So I've got another new story for you guys.
This story is going to be based on a bunch of Taylor Swift songs, but it is not a song-fic. Repeat- THIS STORY IS NOT GOING TO BE A SONG-FIC. It is based on songs, but has an actual story line and plot and everything. So I would really appreciate if you would all give this story a chance!
Hopefully, you won't be disappointed.
The look in his eyes scared me and shook me to the core.
I squeezed my eyes shut as I saw him lift his hand up, and steeled myself for the impact. And when it came, it was worse than I had anticipated. I fell to the ground and looked up at my husband, tears clouding my vision and distorting everything. His face was angry and twisted with rage, and I tried to move away from him in fear.
For three years, I convinced myself that I loved him. And for three tears, I had let myself get kicked around and abused. But I was done. I was sick of giving him second chances and being disappointed when he just would turn around and hit me again. I was sick of crying, sick of being hurt, sick of being used. I no longer had a shred of love left for my husband, but I honestly had no idea how I could get away from him and the hurt he was inflicting on me.
He doesn't realize that I can be broken. Actually, he doesn't realize that I am broken. I can't handle this anymore…I can't handle him anymore. I feel like I don't even know him anymore. He isn't the same man that I fell in love with. He's changed- he's become a monster.
Almost everything he does makes me hurt these days. His temper terrifies me and when he's not mad, he's judgmental and rude. Something about him makes me just want to run and hide…far away. And that's exactly what I need to do. I need to get away from him and try and give myself a normal life.
What in the world is he doing to me?
When we got married, he was everything that I needed. He was like my heartbeat, my oxygen…my life. But it took me a little while to figure out that he had quite the mean streak, and every time it emerged, I tried to run and hide. He had a nasty temper, and I know that he knows how badly he's hurting me. How can he just ignore it? How can he stomach seeing the bruises on my body? How can he touch me when I flinch every time he's around?
Is there even a reason for all of this? I'm sick of being so small and fragile and helpless. I'm sick of having my husband, the man who's supposed to love me for better or for worse, put down my dreams. Sick of letting him cut me down and break me. On some sick level, my suffering is making him feel complete and strong.
I'm expected to love a man who hits me? Who abuses me in more ways than one? No. I'm done. Done with him, done with living like this, and done with being hurt. I'm just…done.
"You can't do this." He said calmly, shoving the papers back towards me. "I'm not going to sign those papers."
I bit my lip and picked up the divorce papers, shuffling them up and flipping through them. "Yes, you do. There's no way that you could possibly love me, after doing all of this. Please, just let me go. I'm not happy, you're not happy…and I just want out." I whispered, and then stepped back slightly, out of his reach. It was a reflex; when I did something that I knew he wasn't going to like, I stepped back and made sure that he couldn't touch me. I wasn't about to fight back, there was no way I could, but I could try and avoid confrontations.
He continued to stare at me, and then rubbed his forehead. "I'm sorry, Bella. Please don't do this. I can change, I won't…I won't hurt you anymore." I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head. I had heard this before, and he had never once come through. He noted my hesitation and sighed. "Look…why don't I give you a little space? We…we can go back to the good days, when we were dating and in love and-"
"Fine." I whispered. "But I'm moving out."
He laughed; a cruel and unflinching sound. "Yeah, and where are you going to go? You've got no one else, babe." I stared at him for a moment, realizing that what he said was true. My husband was all I had. He had cut me off from my friends, I had no family…I had no job, no money…nothing. He had done this, isolated me, on purpose. He was trapping me, and he had seemingly succeeded.
"I'll find somewhere, and I'll leave tomorrow." I said stiffly. I wasn't going to let this happen to me anymore. "Look, I know that you must love me, somehow. But I don't think I can stay with you anymore if you're going to keep doing this to me. You can't just push me down and then expect me to continue loving you."
I didn't tell the name of Bella's husband for a reason…figure it out for yourself! But it will be revealed in the next chapter, so no worries. This first chapter is a bit short, but please bear with me.
Xoxo- Melodyella aka Mellie