SURFING THE NET
. . . Where on earth do I get the time to do all the things that I do?
I really shouldn't be writing this, but it's a plot bunny that refuses to leave my head, so here's a quick Chack prompt.(This was typed quickly, so I apologize for any and all mistakes beforehand)
Summary: On average, most teenagers spend up to 8 hours a day online, and that statistic includes a certain evil genius. The only difference is that when Jack visits his favorite sites, he has a evil dragon on his case instead of nosy parents. CHACK PROMPTS
Warnings: Nothing new here, just the usual mentions of slash, shounen-ai, boy's love, BL, yaoi, etc. that I usually have.
Disclaimers: I don't own Xiaolin Showdown . . . obviously. Christy Hui and KidsWB, however, do.
Fictional Chinese monk and Tai Chi master(circa Tang Dynasty-620 CE) who turned to the side of evil over 1,500 years ago. According to the legend, the powerful warrior betrayed his temple and fellow monks by selling his soul to a demon in order to gain immortality and dark magic. In some versions, he could even transform himself into a dragon-like form.
"You've got to be kidding me!"
At the moment, both villains are in their shared bedroom within Chase Young's mountain lair - the teen genius fuming as he reads the Wikipedia entry currently on his computer screen. Long since used to Jack's weekend hobby of correcting the online encyclopedia's entries, Chase barely reacts to his lover's outburst. He simply chalked it up to some foolish post that claimed cold fusion was impossible . . .
"What is annoying you this time, Jack?"
"It's this entry about you. It's just ridiculous and downright insulting!"
Peaking his interest, the evil man leans over and reads the short, albeit fairly accurate, snippet about himself.
"The dates here are incorrect." - begins the dragon warlord, "I left the Xiaolin Temple during the chaotic times of the Northern and Southern Dynasties. By the time the Tang began their rule of China, I had already disposed of Hannibal into the Ying Yang World and claimed the Land of Nowhere as my domain."
"Chase, you have to be kidding me, the only problem you have with this entry is the dates? So what if he's off by a few dynasties? This guy didn't even write about all the amazing battles you've fought or the so-called "invincible" warriors you've defeated and are now eternally serving you as felines!"
"Or the fact that you aren't just a master of Tai Chi, but practically every form of martial art out there!" -interrupts Jack, completely ignoring the immortal's interjection. "Hell, you've probably invented a few of them!"
"He didn't even have the decency to say that you are far from a fictional person! I can't even imagine how you must feel, but I'm pissed. The man I'm in love with is being summed up in some little pathetic paragraph written by some guy who probably spends all his time blogging about meaningless and inconsequential crap . . . I mean seriously, just because you have a computer and internet access doesn't mean you're an expert on anything! If I ever met this douche bag in person, I swear that I'll eviscerate him with a rusty spoon!
Hearing his last name at such an octave, Jack pauses in the middle of his rant and turns to the man behind him. Ruby eyes widened in surprise by the amused look currently on the warlord's face.
"As adorable as it is to know that you'd disembowel a complete stranger with rusted utensils on my behalf, this is nothing to lose your temper over. But if you are truly bothered by this person's oversight, feel free to right a more . . . detailed entry."
"A biography written by an intellectual genius, I'd be honored."
With a blush, Jack turns back to his computer and starts typing away, intent on creating a entry that would please his idol. The teen genius is so focused on his new task that he is startled when he feels Chase's breath in his ear.
"You will of course remember to include that my consort is an unrivaled genius that would make Zeus's Ganymede hide in shame, correct?"
"Of course. Thanks for the compliment by the way."-replies Jack, smiling to himself.
"Well, the purpose of an biography is to present the truth. . . When you're finished, come find me."
With that, the Heylin warlord leaves his young mate to his current project, knowing fully well that his biography would most likely go from a concise paragraph to a detailed, ten-volume collection.
"Jack, it is not my birthday."
"And neither is it our anniversary."
"Where is it written that I have to give you a present only when I'm obligated to?" -asks Jack, slightly annoyed by the warlord's insinuations.
"You make a valid point, however it doesn't quell my suspicion."
"Would you just open the package already! It's not like there's a bomb in it."
With no further argument, Chase opens the cardboard box in his hands to see two books nestled in packing material:
The Complete Art of War by Sun Tzu and Sun Pin
The Book of Five Rings by Miyamoto Musashi
For a few moments, the warlord is silent as he removes the two hardcover books from the box.
"Now, I know that you already have the original copies of these books, but I also noticed that they were getting a little worn. Back in the day, the paper wasn't properly treated to withstand moisture and long exposure to air. But then again, books weren't meant to last for centuries. Anyway, I put your original copies into a special airlock container that I came up with about a year ago and as long as they stay in there, they'll be preserved for eons. I bought these new edition replacements so that you can still read them whenever you want."
"Jack, these are my favorite books." - states Chase as his normally confident voice wavers with stunned disbelief.
"Yeah, I kind of figured that out since you're always citing them. These particular books have been expanded with some recently discovered material so now you can add some new quotes to your repertoire."
"Thank you, Jack." -expresses the dragon, impressed that the young villain was familiar with both works.
Looking up at the ancient warrior, the teen is surprised to see a warm expression on his face.
" . . . You're smiling."-observes Jack, in an almost accusing tone.
"That is what one normally does when they are pleased."
As he speaks, Chase curls an arm around a narrow waist and brings the goth closer.
"Even evil warlords can be happy. I don't walk around all day with a deep scowl or dark smirk. Besides, how could I not smile from receiving such a well thought out gift for no reason. If I didn't know any better-"
All the sudden, the dragon lord stops speaking as he makes the connection.
"Jack, did you happen to visit a certain online bookstore recently?"
" . . . Yes."
"So, I can expect a ridiculous amount of packages to be delivered here within the week?"
"It's not my fault! I went on for the sole purposes of only buying a present for you. And I was on my way to the checkout page, but then that stupid page popped up - the one that says: See What Other Customers Who Bought This Product Have Bought. Long story short, I ended up buying some reference books, a few DVDs and a new laptop."
After his explanation, the teen genius cheekily smiles up at the warlord.
"Jack, what am I going to do with you?"
"Well, I did just give you a present,"-begins the young villain with a smirk. "I have a few fun ideas . . ."
"Spicer, it is now three a.m., Don't you think that you've read enough of your online comics?"
"Chase, you can never read enough, even if it is just comics. If anything, you should be congratulating me for reading more than the average person."
"Perhaps", -acquiesces the dark warrior with a smirk. "But even you must admit that a novel is more mentally stimulating than a comic book."
"I disagree, comics combine pictures and words to tell a story and therefore stimulate more areas of the brain. Although, the intellectual stimulation of the story is completely dependent on the writer and artist."
"Would you be so kind as to provide an example of this stimulation?" -remarks Chase as he sits down next to the genius.
"Well, I bet that you didn't know that I've gotten a lot of my ideas for my robots from the pages of manga . . . and a few anime series now that I think about it."
"Are these the same ideas that lead to the creation of the koi-bot or, my personal favorite, the bubble-bot?"
"Haha, aren't you just a barrel of laughs . . . I was actually talking about the Clone-bot. When it was finished, that robot could change forms so seamlessly that it would make Michael Bay shit his pants."
Remembering that rather interesting robot, a smirk grows on Chase's face. Getting comfortable on the couch, the Heylin lord mentally prepares himself for the rest of the conversation(despite the fact that it was about the validity of comic books). In all honesty, the immortal cared little about Jack's late night hobby, he supposed everyone had their interests and he wasn't one to judge a person based upon them. He, being an evil prince of darkness, simply liked to play devil's advocate to test the cogency of Jack's arguments. It was a rather fun game trying to stump a genius.
"Not to mention," -continues Jack, well aware that the dragon was losing interest. "some of these series are very educational."
"In what area?"-inquires Chase in a dull tone.
"The bedroom, for one. Remember the new game we played last night?"-suggests the teen.
"Yes, rather fondly actually."
As he speaks, the dark warrior remembers in great detail the fun the two had last night. Even now, Chase still couldn't figure out how Jack managed to twist his body so that no matter what position they were in, their lips always found one another's.
"Well, you can thank Hinako Takenaga. I saw a few of those moves illustrated, in great detail, in one of her comics. So, I decided to try them out."
". . ."
". . ."
"You may continue your research, Jack."
"I thought as much- Hey!"- shouts the teen in surprise when Chase removes the personal computer from his lap. "I thought you said I could continue!"
"And you can, later."
With that, Chase leans over and begins kissing his young lover, his hands already exploring the lithe body. All thoughts of protest are obviously gone from the young genius once Jack starts to return the gesture. A perfectly-arched eyebrow raises when the immortal feels a firm grope to his backside.
"And which artist do I have to thank for that?" -asks Chase, looking down at the smirking teen.
"That one was all Jack Spicer."
"This is bullshit." -begins a rather irate genius as he surfs the web while simultaneously devouring a bowl of Cocoa Krispies. "I've been an active villain for the last five years and I've got nothing to show for it."
"Well, most villains don't eat children's cereal."-comments Chase absentmindedly from across the breakfast table. The dragon lord busy glancing over a newspaper.
"So if I stop eating kid's food, I'll be evil . . . eh, not worth it."
"I wasn't serious, Jack."
"Joke all you want Mr. Chase Young- Evil Heylin Dragon Prince of Darkness and ruler of the Land of Nowhere . . . you're so awesomely evil you could wear a fluorescent fanny pack and still look menacing."
"Well, when you put it that way, I do sound quite impressive."
". . . Never mind, you don't get it."
Catching on to his mate's despair, Chase goes to see what Jack is doing online that day. The genius is at the moment glaring at a Google search page. Typed into the search bar is JACK SPICER and beneath are a bunch of random articles about the poet by the same name. Not one entry about the evil teen genius.
"Is this the reason for your behavior today? Jack, you are upset for no reason."
"No reason! No one knows who I am, Chase. Not even the internet!" -shouts the frustrated teen.
"Jack, the best villains are ones that stay in the shadows, manipulating the would around them as they see fit. In actuality, it is better to be unknown. It makes it that much better when you play with their meaningless lives and throw them into chaos. . . after all, the Devil's greatest trick was convincing the world that he didn't exist."
"I didn't think of it like that."
"Not to mention, if more people knew about your genius, they would be scheming ways to steal you away from me. We can't have that now can we?"
As he speaks, Chase is behind the genius, kissing the expanse of skin covering Jack's neck and shoulder(The Heylin knowing full well it was one of the teenager's many erogenous spots).
"Like you would let anyone steal me from you."
"Never." -agrees Chase in between kisses.
"And . . . uh, it's not like I really care what anyone else thinks about me."
The dragon smirks as Jack's mind begins to cloud, his logical thoughts turning into ones of a very different nature.
"Isn't it enough that I alone know how valuable you are, Jack?"
"Mmm . . . Definitely."
And with that the subject is dropped as Jack turns around and returns the favor his lover had bestowed upon him.
"Heh . . . Heh heh . . . HAH HAH heh HAH!"
Hnn. . . There it is again, that incessant laughter.
"Hee hee HAH!"
What on this earth could be so funny?!
On most days, the dragon lord could easily block all the noises of the world and focus on his meditation. Even with the new edition of one vociferous teenager to his home, Chase still was able to channel his energy and concentrate on the calming ritual. But not even the most patient monk could achieve meditation with such obnoxious laughter echoing off the mountainous walls. So deciding to get to the bottom of the distraction, the warlord stands up to search for his consort. His search is not long, he simply follows the laughter to the main area of his lair. Jack is sitting on a flight of stairs, a young tiger lounging at his feet. In the genius's lap is his ever-present laptop and in his ears are a set of ear buds. The tiger acknowledges his master, however Jack is too busy laughing his head off at whatever is on the computer screen.
"HAH hee hee . .. Heh HAHA!"
"Hee hee . . . HAH HAH . . *snort*."
Hearing the warlord, Jack jumps and quickly removes the headphones. Crimson eyes look up at the irritated dragon in confusion.
"Chase, is something wrong? I thought you were meditating."
"Then why'd you st- ohhh."
Jack stops when he realizes the exact reason why the Heylin was here.
"I'm sorry that I bothered you, it's just that this video was so hilarious."
"Let me guess, another video of a rodent doing something as ridiculous as windsurfing?"
"No, and that was only one video. I'm watching the show, Jeffrey and Cole Casserole."
" . . . Do I even want to know the premise for this show?"
"Why not? It's a viral show about these two guys that do sketch comedy from their apartment. It's hilarious."
"I'm sure it is."
"Don't act like you don't laugh at this kind of stuff. You totally smirked when I showed you that video from the 'I'm a Marvel and I'm a DC' series. It was a surprise to learn you're into comics, though."
"Contrary to popular belief, I do more than scheme and meditate in my free time. But my hobbies are not the reason I'm here."
"I know, I'll try to keep my laughter to an acceptable decibel."
-THE NEXT DAY-
"AWESOME, Jeffery and Cole Casserole is now a show on LOGO! I can't wait!"
" . . . "
"Chase, what's wrong?
One night in his lab, Jack is randomly checking his email while on . The teen doesn't spend a lot of time on the website, in fact he had only made an account so that some friends from high school could get in contact with him. He wasn't one of those weirdos that could spend 10 hours a day on the networking site. Oddly enough, the only person he had regular contact with was Kimiko Tohomiko. At the moment the two are having a wall-to-wall chat.
Kimiko: Hey Jack.
J. Spicer: Hey, you're up late.
Kimiko: I was helping Dad finish the programming for Goo Zombies 6.
: That's good. GZ 5 had a glitch on level 4 that gives you an extra life.
Kimiko: It wasn't a glitch, it's supposed to make the player want to play more. Dad thought it would help boost the player's morale in order to defeat the Zombie Queen.
: Tch, if they can't even make it to level 4 without help, they shouldn't be playing. It made the game WAY TOO EASY.
Kimiko: Well, it's just an ego boost. Anyway, GZ 6 should challenge even you.
: For like 5 minutes.
Kimiko: Very Funny. You and Raimundo both play that game way too well for people that didn't even design it. Anyway, I sent you a quiz you should definitely take.
: Like what, "If you were a Sponge-bob character, which would you be"? I think I'll pass.
Kimiko: Would you just take it? It'll take only five minutes.
: Fine, I'll post the results.
Ending the chat, Jack goes to his messages and sees the quiz in his inbox.
"What Kind of Guy Will Fall For You?"
This is ridiculous, why on earth would Kimiko send me this, it's a girl quiz anyway. Those monks really need more to do. . .
Nevertheless, Jack clicks the box and starts to take the quiz. After about twenty minutes of seemingly random questions about his personality, Jack is understandably fed up by the last few questions.
Do you believe in love at first sight?
() Maybe . . .
() It's possible, so I'm gonna say yes?
(x) It depends on who you're looking at.
() No, I think it's just a bunch of hocus pocus.
This is getting ridiculous . . .
What would you do if you're boyfriend broke up with you over text while you were sick?
() I'm single, but if it were to happen, I would be sad.
(x) Screw him, he was a jerk anyways.
() I would get sensitive and cry.
() I would be devastated for about a week.
Anybody who breaks up with someone in a text message isn't worth it. If you want to break up with someone, have the balls to do it in person.
What would you do if you saw one of your classmates being picked on?
() Go and get help. Maybe talk to a teacher?
(x) Feel bad for them, but laugh about it.
() Run over and help them . ..
() I would walk away. It's none of my business
Good, this stupid thing is done.
As he waits his results to be calculated, and sends the quiz to five random people on his friend list, he thinks.
Tch, knowing these stupid quizzes, I'll probably get paired with some emo reject . . .
Looking at the screen, crimson eyes read the entry and widen with shock.
On Jack's profile is posted the results of his quiz.
The kind of man that will fall for you is one that has a strong, alpha male personality(Think leader of the pack!). Mostly, because that's the only man you could ever see yourself with. Prone to grandiose ambition, this man will most likely seem out of your league, but don't let that stop you. You are intellectual and rational, but not in the conventional way(Most people think you to be strange ,odd, and even goofy). Because of this, your alpha male will find you interesting and not easily bore of your company. Prince Charming will most likely be the type to command attention the second he walks into a room, especially yours since you can be a bit absent-minded. And taking into account your appreciation of the aesthetic, he will be drop dead gorgeous. Despite his looks, he will be able to easily match your intellect and even challenge it. However, BE PATIENT! This man is the type to stake out his territory early, but he doesn't like to be voraciously pursued. When he's ready, he'll come to you!
Beneath the post, Kimiko has posted a comment.
Kimiko: I told you to take it. ;P
J. Spicer: Is this quiz describing who I think it's describing?
Kimiko: I told you, dragon boy's definitely likes you. Why else would he let you hang all over him?
J. Spicer: I guess, but according to this I'll have to wait for who knows how long before I know if I even have a chance.
"Not as long as you think, Spicer."
The sudden voice next to his ear startles the young genius who shouts in surprise and nearly falls out of his chair.
"Chase! What're you-"
"These results are fairly accurate, as well as the fire monk's intuition." -interrupts the warlord as he peruses the webpage.
"Wait . . . Are you saying that quiz is right, that you actually have feelings for me?"
"I have no interest in teenagers that idolize me, Jack."-begins the evil lord. "However, a rare genius that has genuine romantic feelings for me, is an entirely different thing indeed."
As he speaks, Chase has turned the genius around in his chair. The dragon has lowered his gaze to meet the seated teen, a seductive gleam in the golden eyes.
"I came here tonight to share my observations with you, Jack. In the last few years, you have acknowledged your weaknesses in physical combat and begun to cultivate your intelligence. A wise decision that led to your increasing victories in showdowns and earned the respect of the Xiaolin as well as the Heylin. Despite the fact that you battle foes that use magic and sorcery, your machines have adapted to compensate that disadvantage. Your plans and schemes are designed with the forethought of a true genius. I'm impressed."
"You are?" -asks Jack, his voice thrown off by his obvious confusion.
"Is it that hard to believe?"
"Honestly, yes. You've practically ignored me and when you don't it's only to acknowledge my shortcomings."
"I had to allow you time to realize your own potential. . . to acknowledge that you have gifts."
"Gifts? Like what?"
"Intelligence, manipulation, unpredictability, beauty - gifts that villains spend forever trying to attain and you naturally have. Gifts that I can bring to their full potential. . . now, would I be wrong in assuming that you still want me, Jack? That those looks of idolized admiration were masking looks of lust." -asks Chase with a dark smirk.
"Never."-responds the evil teen quickly.
With that, the immortal kisses the pale teen. It isn't gentle, as the action is done to wordlessly claim the young villain as his. It is passionate, like something the warlord had wanted to do for a very long time. He takes the time to properly taste and savor the eager mouth offered to him. Leaving the teen breathless, Chase makes his way slowly down the pale throat. Relishing the attention he was finally receiving from the Heylin lord, Jack's hands are busy threading through dark, silky hair. A smirk is on the goth's face as he realizes something.
"I guess, I'll have to change my Facebook status."-gasps out the pre-occupied genius.
"If you wouldn't mind."
Over on the forgotten computer screen, a new comment is posted on Jack's wall:
Kimiko: Jack? Are you still there?
I got the idea for this when I was online one day. As those of you that use Internet Explorer know, whenever you open a new tab, it displays the nine websites you visit most.
WIKIPEDIA - I just thought it would be funny to see a wikipedia entry about Chase Young since there seems to be one about everything else.
AMAZON - I have a love/hate relationship with this site. Basically I love when I have money and I hate it when I don't.
ONE MANGA/SPECTRUM NEXUS/MANGA FOX - (This is based on an actual conversation, minus the bedroom part, that I had with my sister)It's no secret that I read a lot of manga, however due to a lack of funds most of them is read online. A few favorites of mine include, but are not limited to Naruto(Masashi Kishimoto), Bleach(Tite Kubo), Vagabond(Takahiko Inoue), and Vassalord(Nanae Chrono).
*Hinako Takanaga is one of my favorite BL/yaoi manga-ka.(I suggest both her "Challengers" and "The Tyrant Falls in Love" series)
GOOGLE - Oh fanny packs take me back the early 90s . . . Anyway, this is based off what comes up when you actually type in Jack Spicer in the Google search engine- besides the Xiaolin Showdown stuff of course.
BTW, I love Cocoa Krispies, even though I'm 22.
YOUTUBE - I had Jack watching some of my favorite videos on YouTUBE.
"Jeffrey and Cole Casserole" is ridiculous but hilarious show on LOGO that started as a viral show on YouTUBE starring/written by Jeffrey Self and Cole Escola
The "I'm a Marvel . . . and I'm a DC" series is for any of you comic book fans out there
(Just type the titles into the YouTUBE search bar, and you'll find them).
FACEBOOK - I thought this would be a fun way to Jack and Chase together. Personally, I don't use this site a lot, but I like taking the weird quizzes, some are stupid and others are fun - I took a Which Greek God are you Quiz, my result: Zeus.(I'm not sure what to think of that).
ANYWAYS, I hoped you all enjoyed reading this! I know I enjoyed writing it . . .