Down the River with Daggett (An Angry Beavers Fan Fiction)

It was a beautiful spring morning and the birds were tweeting merrily and the fish were jumping out of the river happily until suddenly, the sweet sounds of springtime were interrupted by two loud voices that were screaming at each other. Daggett and Norbert were arguing with each other once again.



"FINE!" yelled Daggett.

"FINE!" yelled Norbert.

"FINE INFINITY!" yelled Daggett as he began walking out the door.

"FINE TWO TIMES INFINITY!" yelled Norbert as he began going towards the door.

"FINE LOOPY ROOPY GROOVY TO THE TWENTIETH POWER!" yelled Daggett as he goes out the door.

"FINE FRUITY TUITY LOOFY PROOFY DOPY WOPY TO THE THIRTHIETH POWER!" yelled Norbert as he follows Daggett to the door.

"FINE TO THE D, TO THE A, TO THE G, G, E, T, T, why boy you ugly!" sing song Daggett until Norbert shut the door.

"Humph! I don't need that porcupine haired spooty brother of mine! He thinks that he's better than me, doesn't he? Well, I can do everything by myself…except that he's still my brother and I never really got anywhere farther than the bridge to our dam! Oh Norb-mmmppphhhffffff!!!!"

Suddenly, two mysterious figures jumped down from thin air and grabbed Daggett and one of the figures pulled out a remote control and pushed a huge red button on the control and up came a huge rat looking ship that came out of the river. The two strangers jumped into the ship with Daggett in their arms and the ship submerged into the bottom of the river.

Meanwhile, Norbert was still inside the dam and he walked back to the couch and yelled out loud, "Ha! Finally! I thought he would never leave! Now, I got the dam to myself! I don't have to worry about my spooty brother's constant annoying voice, his unbear-ee-able screaming, his overbearing weirdness and his…" Norbert stopped a moment as he saw a picture of him and Daggett at their birthday party they had a couple of days ago and he goes to the picture and he sighed.

"And his usual fun-loving attitude at our parties. Oh! Look at how my baby brutha was enjoying pinning the tail on the donkey, even though he ended up pinning the cord that went to the TV and made the TV blew up. Awww…I got to go out and find him!"

Norbert ran outside the dam and screamed out, "DAGGY!!!! DAGGETT!!! WHERE ARE YOU LITTLE BRUTHA?!"

As Norbert ran through the forest to search for Daggett, Daggett was still inside the mysterious ship and he screamed at his captors:


"Awwww….quit yer yammering ya pointed bird thingy!" said a gruff voice.

Daggett looked up and saw a huge river rat about 6 feet tall and he wore a blue and white striped suit with black shoes and a blue and white striped hat.

"What's up with the gangster outfit?" asked Daggett.

"Zip it shorty! I'm Big Tall Eugene and I own this here ship! Me and my gang kidnapped ya because we're asking for some big cash money! Besides, we don't have the money to pay fer the rent and the light bills. I'm telling ya, those light bills are murder!"

"Yeah, well you know I like to stay and chat about why light bills are always so high for some reason, but I got to get back to my brother since I don't usually stay away from home for too long and…" Daggett started.

"SHUT YER YAP!" shouted Big Tall Eugene and Daggett stopped talking. "Tomorrow, we're going to ask yer brother fer the ransom money and he better give us the money if he wants his precious little brother again!" said Big Tall Eugene and Daggett shivered at the thought.

"Now, I'm going to get my beauty sleep, so nobody better bother me!" and Big Tall Eugene went to the back of the ship.

Daggett looked at his two captors and he started talking. "You guys just stand here all day and do nothing? Man, I can't stand standing still for so long, I mean I gotta let off some energy you know? Speaking of letting off some energy, I gotta a cramp in my hands, so why not just untie me for a second, hmm?"

"Not a chance, shorty," said one of the captors.

"Yeah, the boss won't be happy with us if we just let you go," said the other captor.

"But, it's just for a second. Pleeeeeeaaaaaaassssseeeee, with sugar honey on top?" pleaded Daggett, looking innocent.

The captors hesitated then said, "Awww…alright shorty, but no games!"

The captors started to untie Daggett and Daggett suddenly hits the captors with the swipe of his tail and he starts running out of the room and through the ship.

Meanwhile, Norbert was dressed up in a military uniform and he went searching for Daggett while saying into his pretend COM link:

"This is Beaver Alpha Dos. I'm searching for a brown colored beaver with a pointy red nose and weird colored eyes. He's been missing for an hour now and…awww… what the heck, I gotta find Dag before my hair starts to lose its moisture and before something bad happens to the little guy!" So, Norbert went deeper into the forest to find Daggett.

Meanwhile, Daggett was running around the ship as he tried to find an opening in the ship to escape to. Finally, Daggett found an opening and was just about to reach the opening when he accidentally tripped on a spider and triggered the alarms. The alarm woke up Big Tall Eugene and he ran outside the room to see what the matter was and his men started crying out, "The pointed bird thingy's escaping! The pointed bird thingy's escaping!" "WHAT!!! Aw man!! There goes my rent!" bellowed Big Tall Eugene and he ordered his men to run after Daggett, who had just finally got out into the escape route and he started swimming away from the ship.

Daggett popped out of the water like a cork and he started swimming towards the dam when suddenly, several river rats started chasing him on boats. Daggett then swam as quickly as he could, dodging acorns as the river rats were using their slingshots to shoot acorns at Daggett. Daggett then zipped towards the bottom of the river and he swam upward so fast that he leaped four feet off the ground.

"Ooohhh!!! Look at the pretty bird thingy!" said the river rats, not paying attention to where they were going and suddenly, the river rats crashed into a bridge. Daggett looked back and yelled out, "!!!!!! See ya spootheads, I'm back home to my toys and I won't be back until—AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" Daggett screamed as he realized that he was closing in on the dam but he was going too fast that he couldn't stop and he flew into the dam and crashed into the couch being knocked out unconscious in the process.

Suddenly, the door to the dam opens and in comes Norbert, his hair looking flat and his uniform looking drenched. "Aw man! Not only is my hair all messed up, but also I couldn't find Daggett! I shouldn't have yelled at him! He always said that he would run away, but he never meant it! And now, he's probably gone foreva!"

Norbert was about to slump down on the couch in sadness, until he heard a loud snoring in the couch and who was in the couch but Daggett!

Norbert just stared at Daggett in the couch with a mixed emotion of joy and anger. Just as Norbert began advancing towards Daggett, a loud crash rang in the kitchen, which woke Daggett up immediately and he jumped into Norbert's arms and said, "Oh Norby! I'm so glad to see you!"

"Dag! What the heck happened?" Norbert asked surprised.

"I'll explain later! I think those rats are after me again!" said Daggett.

The boys then ran to the kitchen and they saw Big Tall Eugene and his minions sitting in a huge mess of broken wood and metal from their boats.

"Ow! Next time I said stop the boat, ya'll stop the boat!" yelled Big Tall Eugene.

"Who are you?" asked Norbert.

"Why, I'm Big Tall Eugene (can't you tell from my height?) And I was trying to kidnap your brother for some ransom money!"

"Kidnap my brother?! That's crazy!" started Norbert.

"And I wouldn't go back to ya'll if you paid me a thousand El Grapadura toys!" interrupted Daggett.

Norbert sighed and said, "Well, if it's money you want, then we can give it you."

"We can?" said Daggett puzzled. Norbert gently nudged Daggett on the side and then Daggett exclaimed, "Oh, oh! Yeah, yeah yeah! We can! We can!"

"You got the money? Where?" asked Big Tall Eugene.

"Right here," Norbert pointed to a huge red sign on the floor of the dam.

Big Tall Eugene and his minions stepped on the huge red sign and Norbert pressed a button on the side of a wall and said, "See you later, suckers!" And Big Tall Eugene and his minions were launched up into the air and through the roof and they sailed through the air where they were never seen again.

"Wow Norby! That was awesome!" said Daggett excitedly.

"Yeah. It was, wasn't it?" said Norbert proudly.

"Hey Norb," began Daggett.

"Yeah, Daggy Waggy?" said Norbert.

"Sorry about the whole runaway thing," said Daggett.

"That's okay, brutha. I'm sorry about running you out of the house." Said Norbert.

"Hey Norb. What were we arguing about anyway?" asked Daggett.

"I have no idea. It's just one of those mysteries of the world that we'll never figure out." Said Norbert.

"Ummm…..okay!" said Daggett, a bit confused.

Norbert and Daggett laughed at this and they went to the kitchen to get some lunch.