" And this species is always known for extra slimy around the hands so be careful around that, because the slime could KILL YOU. Everyone clear? Any questions? " Jack was finishing up one his important and super serious debriefings. Gwen was tapping her pencil, Tosh was fiddling with some sort of broken technology and Owen, apparently, had a question.
"Yeah, I got one. Who's playing catcher, you or Ianto?" Ianto quickly looked away from the pens he had been arranging, and then looked wide-eyed to Jack. Jack blinked. Gwen rolled her eyes, "For Christ's sake Owen, you can't just throw it at them. We had this bet, yeah?" Jack blinked again. "Oh?"
Ianto glared at him. He was trying to convey "You're not really entertaining this madness, are you?" through one look and he was overwhelmingly unsuccessful. Jack laughed. "Oh yeah? Who bets what?" Ianto glare deepened and he gritted his teeth. "Well," Owen started, "I figure you top. Gwen figures there is some sort of sharing system, and Tosh thinks Ianto tops. "Ianto blinked, and looked confused. How could two thirds of his coworkers be wrong? Jack just laughed, chortled really, at the team's curiosity and Ianto's growing discomfort. Owen seemed unphased, "Yeah, but Gwen is dead wrong. No way that's true."
Jack wrinkled his brow. Now he was interested. Ianto could feel the upcoming conversation like train headed right for his stomach. This was going to be very unpleasant. Jack only tossed a passing glance to Ianto's tomato-colored face before moving on. "Why is that?" Owen sighed as if he was an idiot. As if Jack knew absolutely nothing about his own relationship. "Because Ianto is too anal- Pun intended," Owen granted himself a smirk and Ianto glared at him evilly, "For that. There would have to be some sort of Chart, or points system or you know… " Ianto had had about enough. His face was bright red, and his sex life was being casually discussed as if he wasn't there. You could almost see the lid flying off. "A CHART?" he demanded. Owen nodded, "Yeah, some sort of-" Ianto stood up. " A chart? You think I have a chart? For Sex. You think I have a SEX CHART?"
Tosh and Gwen couldn't squelch giggles as their heads conjured up images of construction paper charts and movable magnets deciding whose turn it was. They almost didn't notice as Ianto stormed off and Jack followed, throwing the team a jaunty wink and telling them to, "Figure it out yourselves!"
AN: So, Who do you think is right? Owen? Tosh? Gwen? Do you think Ianto has a sex chart? Let me know!