This is something new that I have been working on… I hope you like it… please review… I need the feedback to know if I should continue… oh and p.s. I do not own these characters, Stephanie meyer does, but the story is all mine…

When I woke up it was a foggy, cold day. I could feel a chill deep in my bones and I wasn't sure if it was the cold weather or the part of my soul that was now gone. It seemed as if God himself was unhappy about the events that were to take place today. As I was debating whether or not to get up my mom walked in with a cup of coffee and sat on my bed. I couldn't look at her as she tried to talk to me so instead I got up, grabbed my towel, and locked myself in my bathroom.

As I let the hot water loosen up my tense muscles I let out a sob that only I knew I could hear. The one good thing about showers, I've come to learn, is that the water is able to hide the tracks of my tears. As soon as I stopped crying I was able to finish my shower, all I wanted to do was crawl back in my bed and rewind the past week. I got out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my hair and another around my body. When I walked into my room I wasn't surprised to see my two best friends sitting on my bed waiting for me.

I knew why they were t here and I let them do what they needed to do. They dressed me, did my hair, did my make up, and made me breakfast. I was only able to eat a half a piece of toast and sip some water. If I would have eaten anything else I think I would have vomited. Finally my mom came into the kitchen and announced that it was time to go. I couldn't move, I wouldn't move, I didn't want it to be real. I held in the sob I knew was coming and braced myself for the day ahead.

I held it together until we got in the car, then I silently let the tears roll down my cheeks. My mom offered me a tissue and I refused. I would never wipe these tears away, every tear held a memory, an emotion, my life. We finally arrived at our destination and my body became numb. The time had finally come and I couldn't deal with it. I couldn't deal with all the people, all the questions, all the stares. I needed time to be alone so I snuck off and had a cigarette. I hadn't smoked in 5 years but that all changed with one phone call.

When I walked back over to the car my mom and two best friends were standing there waiting for me. As we walked into the building they never left my side. I looked over to the left and I saw him. I walked over to him and hugged what I could. Then I kissed his cheeks, kissed his lips, kissed his forehead and then walked away. I couldn't look at him any longer, especially with everyone staring at me. I walked into the bathroom and was followed by my mom and my two best friends. The whole time I was in the stall they didn't say one word. They let me cry all I needed to. I was scared, I was worried, I was in shock. I didn't know how this was all going to turn out. I just wanted it to be over. I finally pulled myself together and came out of the stall. I washed my hands, blew my nose, and stood tall. I needed all my strength if I was going to get through this.

We walked out into the entry way and it was deserted so I walked over to him one last time and laid my hand on his cheek and put my head on his chest. I wanted him to say something but no words came out, there was just silence. I gave him one final kiss and then slipped a letter into his jacket pocket and walked inside where everyone was gathered. The next forty-five minutes passed by in a blur. I couldn't hear a word of what people were telling me. All I could do was smile and nod for fear that my voice would betray me.

As we got back in the car I noticed that my hands were shaking. I tried to ignore it but it kept getting worse and worse. My anxiety and stress were getting the better of me and there was nothing I could do to stop the panic attack that was mounting in my chest. After a bottle of water, two xanax, a cigarette, and a few minutes passed I was finally able to catch my breath and relax for a second. When we made it to our next destination I sat in the first available chair and avoided as many people as possible. My mom and my two best friends were next to me the entire time. As we were waiting for everything to start I was lost in my memories. I was taken back to a simpler time, I was taken back to the beginning…

Sooooo… whatcha think??? I hope you like… see you next chapter

Xoxoxo

Dsmrm2023