Just a little something that I wanted to write about. Something I had a dream about a few nights ago, decided to write a short story about it. I hope you enjoy. It's nothing special.
It was 5 years ago today when she was first diagnosed. Nobody expected her to live as long as she did. She was slowly losing her battle though. Here I sat, on a small chair next to her hospital bed. The only sound in the room came from the various machines that were hooked to her. She was in a coma. Her body had began shutting down. I tried not to cry each time I looked up at her. She looked so peaceful, her eyes closed, breathing slowly. At least she was still breathing.
"Haruka, why don't you go home for a little while? At least take a shower."
I turned to look at the doctor as he entered the room. He was probably right. But I didn't want to leave her. I didn't reply to him, I only rested my head back on the edge of the bed, waiting for some kind of response from the woman I loved.
"At least go and get a cup of tea, or coffee."
I jumped when he placed his hand on my shoulder. "Yea…I suppose." I looked down at Michiru. "I'll be right back sweetheart. I promise."
After placing a soft kiss on her forehead I left the room. I took my time walking out to the cafeteria. It was a trip I had made several times a day for the past two weeks. It took six minutes, that included the elevator trip, to get from Michiru's room to the cafeteria. At the pace I walked it usually took 413 steps. I grabbed a prepackaged sandwich as well as a cup to fill with strong, black coffee. I pulled my wallet out at the register to pay for the items before making my six minute trip back to her room.
My body froze when I turned the corner to see two doctor's run into Michiru's room. "No…" I barely noticed as the items slipped from my hands to land on the floor, my focus turned on getting to that room. The only sound my ears focused on was the heart monitor that had flat lined. I stood at the door, making sure to stay out of the doctor's way as they tried to revive her. Each passing second felt like an eternity. I slowly fell to my knees when I saw the doctor look up, all he did was shake his head. She was gone.
The house was so quiet. It was so peaceful, so calm. Too quiet. I slid my jacket off, as well as my shoes, my keys fell to hit the floor. The first thing I did, I walked into the living room and put Michiru's favorite CD into the stereo. Soon soft piano music filled the empty house. She'd want it this way. I felt numb. How was I suppose to go on without the one person I loved? I loved her ever since I first laid eyes on her. That was more than 40 years ago. She wasn't suppose to die.
I haven't even cried yet. I don't think it's hit me that she's never coming home to me. I walked into our bedroom to see the perfectly made bed. She was always a stickler for things being so neat and tidy. I flung the closet doors open, half of it was full of dresses, skirts and blouses, the other half, full of dress slacks, khakis, button down shirts, and t-shirts. I reached in and grabbed her favorite black silk dress. With the hanger still on it I placed it over my neck and hugged it tightly. My eyes closed and I tried to envision hugging her for one last time. The feel of her skin, her hug, the touch of her lips against mine, the smell of her ocean air body wash, the scent of her perfume. It all lingered in my thoughts and senses.
I removed the dress from my neck and laid it on her side of the bed. Then I returned to the closet and pushed a few boxes out of the way to get to the built in wall safe. 1, 27, 3, 6. The door opened as it always did. I reached in to pull out a small wooden box. I placed it on the bed beside her dress and opened it. The gun it contained was already loaded, we never unloaded it, just in case. I didn't hesitate. I took one final breath, placed the barrel in my mouth and pulled the trigger.
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