To be and Not to be

Please note that this has been re-written quite many times, so if you think you've read this before, you might actually have ;)

Bella P.O.V

It was the day of Edward's party. And I couldn't be more excited! It was my first party, ever! I had taken a short black cocktail dress on, and black high heels on. And just for the warmth, I had my brown leather jacket on. My truck came to a stop in front of his house. Or should I say mansion? It was huge four stairs tall and with huge windows following around most of the house.

"Wow" I mumbled. I couldn't help but feel awed, by the beautiful mansion. I jumped out of the truck, and slowly made my way to the front door. A tall muscled man stood at the front door, looking like a bodybuilder. He had a black and white suit on and his dark skin was almost black as his black jacket.

"Name," His voice boomed making me automatically take a step back.

"Bella Swan," I replied in a low voice. He looked at the list he had in his hand, then up at me, then down again at the list.

"You can go in," He said, and opened the door for me. I quickly rushed in, and looked around. People were everywhere, it was almost like a sea of humans most were drinking, making out, or dancing. Making it even harder to find Edward.

I sighed and made my way to the bar, that was placed up against a wall that wasn't made of glass. It was almost impossible to come in contact with the bartender, because of all the people. When I finally got my drink, I decided to go look for Edward. When I stood up I couldn't deny that maybe, just maybe, I was kind of drunk. Like really really really drunk. I shook my head trying to get rid of it, which only made things worse. After some time just standing trying to get my balance I finally started to go look for Edward. But you see, firstly: this was the first time of my life I had ever been drunk, second: I was drunk as hell, and thirdly: somebody must have turned the lights up because I had never seen such bright lights. What was in those drinks anyway?

Suddenly somebody walked into me, making me lose my balance and fall into the person my walked into me.

"Are you okay? I mean, I'm sorry I walked into you! I didn't see you!" Edward yelled, his voice drowning slightly in the music.

"I'm okay!" I yelled. He looked hot. Wait did I just think that Edward is hot? He kind of is.. I mean with his wild bronze hair, his smoldering green eyes, and his white shirt and black pants, he almost looked like someone who just walked out of a commercial.

"You came!" He said interrupting my thoughts. But instead of making me think normally again, he just made it even worse. What he just said, could have meant something oh so very different.

"Of course I did!" I smiled to him.

"I'm glad you did, I just didn't think you would. I mean you-..." I couldn't really hear him over the music. So I quickly dragged him after me, as I walked into the closest room I could find. Which turned out to be a toilet. Without looking at Edward I leaning against the wall releasing his hand, and then very slowly I glided down so I sat on the floor. Without any sound from him, he sat down at my side, and sighed. And then the silence filled the room. Not uncombable silence, just.. Noticeable silence.

"Tanya is cheating on me," he suddenly said. I didn't dare to turn to see him. I just kept looking right out into space.

"And you feel?" I asked him slowly. He didn't answer immediately, probably sucking in the question.

"Embarrassed, hurt, shameful, used, and.. Angry," he said. I quickly turned to him.

"You're angry? But not heartbroken?" I asked in disbelieve. I haven't tried the whole relationship-thing, but I'm pretty sure that if I was ever being cheated on I would be very heartbroken.

"Well.." He said and then he took a big gulp of a huge bottle of Vodka, I - surprisingly - hadn't seen him having. "It wasn't like we had the best relationship, you know?" He asked.

"Well, no.. I don't know. But you were together for two years, you know how long that is Edward? That's a very long time," I said and turned away from him again. He sighed and took a gulp again.

"Doesn't matter anyway! I know that she wasn't the one, so.. She wasn't the one," the last part came out as a whisper.

"Why did you date her for so long then?" I asked.

"Well, she was hot..." I glared at him. "What?" he asked in disbelieve.

"Just because she was hot, does not mean you should date her," I said.

"No, yes, I mean.. I guess.. Not," he said, and took a gulp from the bottle again. Then suddenly he turned fully to me with big eyes.

"This is so embarrassing I just keep winning, when you could be out there and have a great time," he said and pointed to the door.

"I think I would be better in here, instead of out there with all the drunk people," I said giggling slightly

"I'm also kind of.. Drunk," he said smiling to me.

"Me too" I said and laughed, then I fully law down on the floor starring up at the sealing. He quickly followed me.

"I never thought we had such a beautiful sealing" Edward suddenly said and then I laughed.

"Yes, it's very beautiful," I sighed. "But the dots would be more beautiful if they would stop spinning, you know," I said and rolled onto my side, the dots were kind of making me sick.

"Yeah, probably" he said and looked down at me.

"I would love to just- " I got interrupted by his hot lips against mine. I gasped and then kissed him back. My hands quickly found their way into his hair, messing it even more. I felt his arms snake around me, pressing me against him.


I slowly opened my eyes, my eyelids felt massively heavy and thick, but I managed. Though when I got them opened I quickly closed them again, the bright white light was shinning from the roof into my eyes blinding me. I slowly opened them again, this time prepared for the scarp light. I kept them close together so a little line only managed to get through. I waited until my eyes had formed to the light. Finally I could make out the room. My jaw dropped as I saw that I wasn't in my bedroom, I was in fact in the middle of a white clean bathroom. Suddenly it all came back to me, the party, the alcohol, the many people, the tears, the dancing and the.. Sex. Oh shit, shit, shit, shit. This was so not happening.

I quickly sat up into sitting position, or tried. A pair of strong pale arms held me in place. I slowly looked up the bare arm, to the shoulder, to the neck and to the face. I gasped as I saw his face.

"Ed-.. Edward?" I whispered shocked. God, he looked gorgeous. His hair was messier than it used to be, I guess that was sex hair, his eyes were shut so I had no chance to see his wonderful eyes, his lips were wide agape almost as if he also were in shock as I was. He looked adorable.

"Edward," I whispered, but got no response.

"Edward!" I whispered more loudly, still no response.

"Edward!" I tried again. This time he mumbled something to low for me to hear. I leaned in to listen better: "Edward!" I said shaking him slightly.

"Aliiice. Go away!" he grumbled, his eyebrows pressed together.

"Sorry to break it for you, but I'm not Alice!" I hissed at him.

"What?" he asked as he opened his eyes slightly, his jaw fell and his eyes turned huge as saucers.

"Am I-.. Am I dreaming?" he asked slowly gaping at me.

"Do you often dream of waking up with me, naked?" I asked ironically.

"No," he said slowly. I looked away from him, the headache taking my attention completely. I pressed my eyelids together and tried to get as far away from him as possible under the little sheet we were laying under. This was so not happening!

I sighed. My throat was dry, my stomach was growling, and my head was spinning it was clearly not the place and time to discus this with myself. I had to get away, and quick.

Oh my God, I was actually laying on the bathroom in Edward Cullen's house, with Edward himself, naked.

A/N: Yeah, so I don't think I'll be writing more on this. Though it is not coming up for adoption! I won't! So quit asking!

Please review, they will make me smile!