Title: Wrong Number
BoyxBoy, language, drunkenness and silliness! xD PWP-ish :b
I don't own Kyle or James, I just made them drunk! Robby owns CHERUB and all of its characters!
James is drunk, and Kyle steps in to help him get back to campus in one piece. But James has other ideas of how to spend the night.
An idea I don't even remember how I got xD I wrote it some time ago, and now I've finally published it! Thanks to my loveable beta-reader and number one fan, Xipil, for beta'ing and encouraging me to write more JamesxKyle! :D I hope you'll all enjoy this little piece of cuteness! xD

At some point, he would have to teach James how to walk while drunk. He couldn't baby-sit him forever, and tonight he actually felt a bit tipsy. Not that he would ever dare get really drunk in the presence of James – all the stupid things he could do! And say! It was only his good luck that was preventing him from doing something to expose himself to the other boy. And of course, his friends had been a big help. He really didn't mind not being present at that many parties, if he could avoid James learning the truth about his feelings.

"James, could you at least co-operate? You're not the lightest person in the world!" Kyle snarled, surprised how mad he really sounded. Well, in some ways, it was easier to be mad at James when he was drunk - or when he had done something stupid. Those two things, however, seemed to be always connected. But James was usually hard to get really mad at. His stupidity was one thing – that loveable, sad face he made when Kyle snarled at him was something completely different.

'You're weak!' He told his inner self, dragging James up the flight stairs, hoping that their return to James' room would be a little bit more discreet. Everyone should be asleep by now – but they could still manage to wake somebody up, if this was one of James' loud days.

'You make it sound like this happens a lot,' he mused silently.' It's not like it's a regular occurrence at all. There's a reason you're always avoiding 'par-taying' with James.'

Halfway up the stairs, James lost balance, and fell sideward to support himself by the rail. Kyle rolled his eyes – oh yes, he could easily get mad at James when he was drunk.

"Can you walk yourself now, or do you want me to carry you like a one-year-old?"

'Some one-year-olds can walk better than he can right now!'

James mumbled something incoherently, nodding lazily. He looked at Kyle and narrowed his eyes. Then he let go of the rail with one hand to tousle his hair. Kyle pressed his lips together and gasped for air.

'Oh no, not the hair tousling,' he pleaded to himself. 'Anything but the tousling!'

"I … think so," James said, cautiously taking one step up the stairs, smiling widely when he succeeded. Kyle sighed.

"I'll be right behind you if you fall," he made James aware, considering how easy it'd be just to let him fall and fall asleep on the stairs where no one would notice him before tomorrow morning. James chuckled, making Kyle's thoughts much softer.

'Yeah, I'll catch you if you fall… but you can fall into my arms… aaany time you want.

Are you drunk?'

James began humming ahead of him, taking light steps up the stairs, swaying a bit when standing still for too long. It was disturbing to watch, and although James smelled like a pub, Kyle would much rather be supporting him all the way to his room.

"Hey, watch this!" James exclaimed happily, making some sort of dance-step on the stairs. Kyle ran up to prevent him from falling when he leaned backwards and swayed alarmingly for half a second. "Uh… what a rush!"

Kyle shook his head and grabbed James by his arm, pulling him away from the rail.

"Maybe I'd better carry you, you know," Kyle said, "just for your own safety!"

James chuckled. "Or maybe you just like to touch me!" he mused cheerfully. "Maybe you're just a rough boy!"

Kyle smiled wryly.

"Yeah, that's the only reason I'm doing this. I wanna get into your pants."

James laughed dizzily, giggling as he pushed Kyle lightly.

"Such a tease," James said accusingly, "you should know better than hitting on your mates, Kylie!" Kyle almost lifted him up from the last step – moving him as far away from the stairs as he could – which was quite a job, since James was heavier than he looked. All those muscles, he thought, trying to ignore the fact that making a move whilst James was drunk would be the easiest thing in the world. James probably wouldn't remember it very clearly either.

"Just can't help myself," Kyle admitted with a smile, trying to drag James away from the stairs that led further upwards. While trying this, James made another swaying dance-step, performing some sort of a pirouette, bumping into Kyle who was dragging his limb forcefully.

James tripped, falling into Kyle (who, of course, held his arms wide open to catch him as he'd promised) forcing them both down to land on the hard floor – if there hadn't been a cement-wall preventing them from that.

Kyle bit his lip not to scream out 'Ouch!' as a reflex, but James just giggled loudly and tried to get up, pushing himself against Kyle, who tried to help himself against the temptation of using James, taking great advantage of the state of drunkenness he was in.

'He won't remember anything anyways – why not use to your own advantage?' Kyle knew that he shouldn't like the idea of using James like that – but the mere thought of his lips was enough to make him flush brightly and push James roughly away.

'Well, at least he won't remember this either!'

James stumbled towards the stairs again, and Kyle got up quickly to stop him – he didn't want to argue with James, and he knew how loud he could act when he was drunk.

'Bet he's loud in bed too… wait! NO! Stop that immediately!'

"Come on, James, you need to go to bed!"

'With me. Go to bed with me!Didn't I just tell you to shut up and stop thinking like that? You're still gonna remember this forever!'

James giggled again and turned around, his arms stretched out as if he was trying to imitate a bird. Great. More fooling around. That wasn't gonna attract people's attention at all.

"But … whyyyyy? Aren't we havin' fun, Kyliiiie?" James asked, grinning, pushing Kyle against the wall. "Unless," he whispered huskily, stumbling over the words clumsily. "Unless this isn't the kind of fun you want."

'Oh god. No, please don't do this to me! Please, please, PLEASE don't do this to me!'

James leaned in, smelling unmistakably like booze. God, it would just be so painfully easy to take advantage of this. So easy to just lean towards James, claim those pink, plumb lips, feel them, taste them, suck on them until they went sore…

'Alright, drunk or not, he's NEVER gonna let you do that!'

"Do you want to have fun with me, Kylie? Is that what you want?"

'Yes, so bad. Too bad. Must… resist.'

"James, we should really…" Oh god, he was panting. He was panting, and his cock was beginning to act on James words, rising from its rather stabile, lowered position.

'No-no-no! Down! Down, boy! Down, Joe!'

"Move in to my bed?"James suggested.

Kyle sighed, and placed his palms on James' chest, trying to push him away.

"Cut it out, James, we'll get caught!" He hissed, beginning to get really annoyed. James grinned, and threw his head back in that cute way Kyle cherished so much. Joking. Right. Great.

"For being gay, you're very reluctant towards boys. Am I not hot enough for you?" Kyle flushed, but then smiled. What the hell was James doing, and why wasn't Kyle resisting this?!

"Haven't I told you?" Kyle asked, turning James around, forcing him against the wall. "I think you're hot stuff, James, but I never thought you wanted the same as I did!"

'Two can play this game!' Kyle thought smugly. 'And I'm not gonna lose this one!'

James smirked, as Kyle leaned in, their faces only inches apart. Kyle wasn't that drunk, and absolutely and utmost aware of his actions, but right now, he was into his own rush.

Why the hell did James have to smell this good, even with the bitter scent of alcohol hanging around him like an unavoidable mist of drunkenness?

"Wow!" James said in a raspy voice, his lips painfully close to Kyle's ear. "That bulge better be your cell-phone, Kylie. You know I don't care too much about arse-fucking."

'Oh-my-fucking-god-in-hell! Is he doing what I think he is?'

"Don't you think it's too late to turn around now?" Kyle whispered, biting his lip attentively before taking in James' earlobe. He could feel James' reaction, their bodies pressed together as they both shivered of the friction between them. This was too good to be true – it couldn't be happening. Not for real.

Kyle didn't care about James' reluctance – if there was any left at all now – and quickly moved his lips onto James, moaning softly at the smooth skin beneath his own lips. How much better could it get? This was better than he'd ever dreamed of. Better than anyone could've ever dreamed of.

It didn't last long before James let Kyle's tongue access to his mouth, their hot breaths mingling together with the strong scent of alcohol. It was the most wonderful experience ever.

Kyle pushed himself further against James, feeling how both of their bodies were responding to the closeness and heated kiss. James was just as keen on this as he was, drunk or not. He liked it.

He knew it was a risky thing to do, but Kyle decided to move his lips lower, down to James' throat, tease the soft skin just beneath his jaw, sucking on it greedily.

"Love it," James groaned as he cupped Kyle's face and forced them into another kiss. "Don't stop…"

Kyle placed his hands in James' wonderful, soft, blonde hair and tousled it playfully, exploring his mouth curiously with his tongue. It had to be a dream.

Then James found his lobe, and challenged Kyle as he began to nibble it teasingly. There was no way James could be doing this to him. And then he realized, feeling how James intentionally began to suck on the thin skin of his neck, that he was doing exactly what Kyle thought he was.

But Kyle found himself missing James' lips, and quickly he claimed the soft flesh again, this time sucking, nibbling and teasing in just the way he'd always dreamed of. They were playing each other, and playing had never felt this good.

James twitched his hips, his hardness pressing against Kyle, as he felt something vibrating in the older boy's pocket. James groaned.

"Oh god… I – yea-ah…" Kyle flushed and broke the kiss, moving slightly away from James.

"No… No, James, it's my cell."

'Why is this happening? WHY ME?'

"Don't stop!" James demanded, pulling Kyle closer to him. Kyle sighed. He'd totally ruined the moment.

"James…" He growled impatiently. The other boy smirked, and had a dangerous glimpse in his eye.

"What? You're afraid of some boy-on-boy action? I thought you were gay! Geesh!"

Kyle rolled his eyes and pressed his lips together, letting entirely go of James. Yup, he'd totally spoiled the romance.

"James, it was my cell phone! How drunk are you?!" James smirked.

"You are afraid!" He giggled, and swayed forwards, grinning into Kyle's chest. "I feel dizzy!" He informed Kyle, bursting into a random fit of laughter.

"Right, maybe I should get you to bed before you faint or something," Kyle said through his gritted teeth, supporting James as he let him to the door. As they walked down the hallway towards James' room, James giggled again.

"Faint? You know, you're not that good a kisser, Kylie-boy!"

"Aw, now I feel bad," he mumbled sarcastically, not putting any sort of effort into feeling hurt. "Wonder why I didn't just leave you on the street. I'm way too soft."

'Why did he have to spoil it? Why can't that boy be serious for one freaking moment in his freaking life?' Kyle wondered sourly, opening James' door and watching him jump over to the bed.

James crawled under the blanket, and Kyle raised an eyebrow.

"You're not gonna take your clothes off?" He asked. The blonde grinned and looked at him with a mischievous grin.

"You want me to take my clothes off?" Kyle rolled his eyes for the god-only-knows-how-many time this evening.

"Yea, I'm dying for you to strip for me, Jamie. I just wanna rip ya clothes off, lover-boy!" Kyle's voice boiled with irony, but James just jumped up and hopped out of the bed, smirking at the other boy.

"Okay, if you really want it that bad," he said, "it's not like I haven't practiced!"

Kyle moaned when James began to sway his hips without a rhythm and unbutton his shirt. There was no way he could be watching this.

"James, cut it out and go to bed! It's four am!" He ordered, trying to focus on something other than the now half-naked James. "And don't you have a t-shirt to sleep in or something? You're gonna catch a cold or something…" He said, his voice a little weak now. No, this shouldn't affect him in this way.

James laughed and trashed his head back, pulling his pants off and swinging them around as he began to sing.

"I'm too sexy for me shirt… too sexy for my shirt so… shit! So sexy that it hurts…" James almost tripped as he pulled off his socks, performing his striptease worse than Kyle had imagined. He sighed.

"James, I'm gonna leave now, and you're gonna sleep. Please don't do anything stupid while I'm not here to stop you, okay?" Kyle said, as he grabbed the handle and opened the door. He really hoped to just wake up and find out it was all a dream – a bad dream.

"Playing hard-to-get, ice queen?" James teased, flashing another one of those mischievous smiles at him. Kyle glared at him darkly.

"If only you knew, James," he said. "And goodnight. Try to get some sleep, or you're gonna die tomorrow."

James nodded and murmured:

"Always so melodramatic, that poof."

Kyle repeated himself as he exited James room – the sooner he got out of there the better – and wished that he didn't have to remember this night for the rest of his life.

"Goodnight, James."

"G'night, lover-boy!"

'My poor brain…'


He hadn't expected James to be awake when he entered – he shouldn't have been awake after being that wasted the night before. And if he knew James as well as he thought he did, he would usually have spent the entire Sunday in bed.

James groaned in pain as he stumbled out of his bed, only wearing the briefs he'd stripped into the night before (Kyle remembered the process very clearly – way too clearly!) when Kyle had forced him to sleep.

He grinned challengingly at James.

"Good morning, sleeping beauty!" He said cheerfully, closing the door behind him as silent as possible as to not worsen James' already aching head. James still grimaced badly when he yawned loudly and stretched his arms.

"Like hell," he said wearily. He looked around the room, noticing especially the way his clothes had been tossed on the floor, and the way a strong scent of alcohol still hung heavily in the air around him.

"Shit! I was so wasted last night! I didn't do anything… too bad, did I?" He asked, looking shamefully at Kyle, almost expecting to be told the truth. Kyle, however, merely shrugged and leaned casually against the wall, having decided last night that James was better off without too many details.

"You mean, besides groping anything that was around in a radius of ten meters and attempting to strip while performing an absolutely hideous version of I'm too sexy?" James hit his forehead with his palm, realizing that only made bad worse. Then he flopped backwards onto the bed again and groaned, covering his eyes with his hands.

"I seriously did that?" James asked, whining as he buried his head in his pillow, making Kyle afraid he might fall asleep again. James didn't want to believe that he'd been so stupid – and drunk – again. If only he knew what he had done other than that.

James looked up sideways from the pillow, and Kyle wondered briefly how he could think that James looked cute even with a giant hangover.

"Will you promise to never let me get that drunk again?" James pleaded, he voice partly muffled by the pillow. Kyle just chuckled and nodded.

"Absolutely – and I don't think I'm the only one who'd happily do that. Uh, and I'd avoid talking to that blonde – Jane? – for a while if I was you, she was pretty pissed at you," he added, recalling how James had thought it would be funny to explore alternative ways of scoring, by renewing the pick-up-lines he'd learnt in sixth grade.

Kyle was happy that James seemed to have no recollection of the night or its events, whatsoever, and he'd really appreciate if it stayed that way.

Seconds later, though, he had to realize that it couldn't last forever, and that now was way too soon to start celebrating this victory.

James was sitting up in the bed, and had been glaring blankly into the air. Kyle nervously watched how his expression changed drastically, his eyes widening and his cheeks turning even paler than they were before. James sank into a lump, and looked at Kyle with a strange expression – a mix of curiosity and … fear?

"Kyle, can I ask you a – uh – question?" There was an alarming edge to James voice when Kyle shrugged, afraid he'd sound too edgy if he suddenly spoke. "Why do I have this … uh … very confusing memory of you… and… me… and… a vibrator?" James asked dumbly, his voice light, almost hollow, and his face twisted with pain now.

Kyle flushed to a bright red colour, and tried to hide it desperately as he forced a mocking grin on his face. He cocked his eyebrow at the other boy.

"James, I'm not sure I want to know about the – eh – kinky fantasies you have about me!" He said, chuckling – mainly because he was ramblingly nervous – and smiling crookedly.

James eyed him icily.

"You know Kyle, one day, we'll get really drunk and we'll really end up … doing stuff. And you know what? Then we won't be able to remember! And you'll be all like: 'Oh, if only James had been able to remember this so we could get together and realize that we love each other!'!" James sneered, trying to imitate Kyle's voice unsuccessfully. Moments later, he realized what he said, scowling at Kyle who couldn't help himself against smirking widely.

"I repeat, James: I don't wanna hear about your little fantasies! You should really save those for your diary. Want me to bring you some breakfast?"

James shrugged, and although he didn't look like a person who should be eating right now, he said he'd love to get some breakfast. Kyle exited his room with a relieved feeling in his stomach; he couldn't believe he'd actually gotten away with kissing James! It was too good to be true!

When he returned, James was dressed, and his bed was made. His bathroom, however, smelled like puke. Not the most appetizing thing in the world, but Kyle had already eaten.

James was studying his reflection in the mirror, before turning at Kyle with a questionable facial expression. He was running his fingers over the same spot on his neck over and over again.

As Kyle handed him the toast he'd brought James, he noticed what had been puzzling the blonde.

'Holy crap! Perfect! Beautiful! You just can't have anything going right!'

James ate in silence, and just when Kyle decided that it was an appropriate time to leave, James stopped him.

"Hey, did I hook up with anyone yesterday?" he asked, taking two painkillers for his headache. "I've got a hickey."

Kyle bit his lip, and was thanking god that James couldn't see his expression – or flush – as he answered him.

"Not… not that I know of." James didn't seem to notice that Kyle was stuttering, and just shrugged.

"Guess you weren't there at the time. Wonder who she is."

Kyle grinned as he closed the door behind him. Well, as long as James kept his mind in that place, there were no worries that he'd ever find out about Kyle.

"She was probably hot," James added smugly, smiling with himself. Kyle shook his head and chose not to make a comment about this.

'Maybe I should try to get James drunk more often,' he thought. However, he dropped the idea right away. Kyle remembered that he had a small, purple spot hidden on his neck as well.