A/N: I don't own this, we all know who does. What I do own is a very small desire to write something fluffy. Sometimes I need a break from the angst. Weird, I know.
This was written for the Foxy Fics charity drive, and thanks to all you wonderful people in the fandom, over $1000 was raised! Yay! Nice job everyone. You can still donate if you choose to. There is a link on my profile and if you do, you'll get 22 pretty incredible o/s's from some awesome authors…many of which I kinda love. :)
I gotta thank my girls for helping me with this, for telling me it's not horrible and it's decent enough to see the light of day. I love them and trust them…you should too. My regular prereaders Twilight44 and UnchangedAffections, along with my chickies jasperlover16, twilightmommyto4girls, WhitneyLove, husmcn, bugsmama07, and edwardsbloodtype…thanks ladies. I adore you all, SO much!
And sorry in advance. This isn't officially beta'd. My beta's coldplaywhore and MaggieMay14 were off enjoying some Twilight convention in Canada when this was due, and I was insanely jealous. Though I may be more jealous of my brother in law who was in Nashville at the same time as a certain Mr. Pattinson. What I wouldn't give to be in the same city as the most beautiful man on the planet…
Let the fluff begin.
Yeah, she caught my eye,
as we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
And I don't think that I'll see her again.
But we shared a moment that will last 'til the end.
You're beautiful, you're beautiful,
you're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face, in a crowded place,
and I don't know what to do.
'Cause I'll never be with you.
You're beautiful, you're beautiful,
you're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
when she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth.
I will never be with you.
"You're Beautiful" by James Blunt
It was a Monday morning just like every other Monday morning in my life. Nothing exciting ever happened to me, especially on a Monday. The week ahead of me was filled with business meetings, angry clients, and endless mountains of paperwork—I was not looking forward to it.
As I rolled out of my bed this morning, the repetitive nature of my life hit me. It hadn't always been this way, but since Jessica left me over a year ago, things had spiraled downward. I had never been too outgoing or adventurous, which proved to be our downfall. She wanted spontaneity, I wanted schedules. She wanted fun, I wanted a plan. She wanted hot, sweaty sex, I wanted to make love. We were nothing alike, which is why we got together in the first place—the whole opposites attract thing. It was great for a couple of years, but as life started to pass us by, she realized I was only holding her back, and she needed more. Lucky for her, she found it in her trainer at the gym where she worked out.
After she left, my life just kind of fell into a routine, and I was fine with that. I was lonely sometimes, but the blind dates my sister continually set me up on seemed to cure me for the most part. Either it ended with great sex and promises of getting together again, which never happened, or it ended with me running away as fast as I could and vowing to be alone for the rest of my life. Either way, I had yet to find anyone I wanted to spend more than one evening with, and it was fine with me. Alice, my sister, didn't agree, and continued at least once a month to fix me up with "the perfect girl." I knew she meant well, so I couldn't be too upset with her.
As I grabbed my laptop case and jacket, I noticed the time. I was running a few minutes late, which was not good since my new assistant was starting today. I wanted to be early, hoping to get things set up and make the morning run a little smoother. My last assistant, Mike, had received a promotion in the company, which left me training another new employee. Hopefully this one would be a faster learner than Mike had been. He did a good job, he just took forever to figure things out.
I rushed out the door, making sure to lock it, as well as the outer building door. My apartment was in a good part of town, and I hadn't had much trouble with security, but my unending need to be safe assured me that there was a first time for everything. Even though I'd lived in the building for the last four years, I only knew two of my neighbors. I didn't recognize any of the people I passed on the street each morning either. My eyes were always focused on the ground, unwilling to meet the glances of strangers and take a chance at making a connection. The one time I'd taken that chance, with Jessica, ended with my heart broken and me paying off two years worth of her shopping sprees. I was pretty sure that personal trainer wasn't going to be able to afford those for too long.
I felt the breeze on my face, noticing that the morning air was a little crisper than yesterday. Autumn was quickly coming and I could see the changing leaves from my office window. Being the boss's son and a partner at the firm afforded me an office with a great view. Too bad no one but me and my assistant ever saw it.
The crowd on the streets seemed a little smaller than usual, leading me to believe I wasn't nearly as late as I thought. I rushed down the stairs into the subway, anxious to catch the train that would get me to my mundane life, move me toward one more week of the routine I'd established for myself. As I lined up to push my way through the turn-style, I fished a token out of my pocket. I dropped it in the slot, the same as I did every other day, and listened as the bar clicked, letting me pass through. The train I needed was not there yet, so I waited along with hundreds of other people. I imagined they were all on their way to interesting, thought provoking places with challenging things to do. I was certain that I was the most boring man on the planet, and as I glanced around at the people standing near me, I knew my designer suit pretty much guaranteed that.
After what seemed like a lifetime, the train finally pulled up, the doors whooshing open. We filed in like cattle in a branding chute, and soon enough the doors closed. I managed to find a seat between a rather large man and a teenaged girl with hair that was such a vibrant red color, I knew she hadn't been born with it. I could hear the music from her ear buds loud and clear, and for a moment I wondered what kind of person could actually enjoy all the screeching and banging that was flowing through them.
As I sat mentally preparing for my day, I felt eyes focused on me. It had been so long since I'd had that feeling, the uncomfortable sense that someone was watching me, and I couldn't help but look up. Instantly, I was drawn to a woman sitting on the opposite bench from me, and her eyes were the deepest brown I'd ever seen. My heart fluttered, my breath picking up, and I wondered who she was, how I could have missed seeing her before. We stared at each other for several moments, a clear connection between us, before my insecurities took over and forced me to drop my gaze. My mind screamed for me to look back, to connect with her again, but my eyes betrayed me, refusing to move. Instead I closed my lids, choosing to revel in the darkness they offered rather than look at anything else on the train.
The woman was beautiful. She looked like an angel, her long brown hair flowing in loose curls around her shoulders, and I ached to touch her. I wondered for a moment if she was real, but fought the urge to look back at her and make sure she was actually there. I also felt guilty for wanting her, because I knew that no matter how hard I tried, my mundane life would ruin her. I was no where near good enough for someone as incredible as she had to be, and I couldn't bring myself to tarnish her.
As I sat quietly in my own private hell, my mind started to play tricks on me. I began to see things, visions of a life I didn't know. I let myself be carried away, overcome by these things that I desperately wanted for myself, but didn't think I was worthy of having.
I saw myself walking along the beach, holding the hand of the girl sitting across from me. In my mind I called her Beauty, being that I didn't know her real name and most likely never would. Beauty laughed at my jokes, hung on my every word, and laced her fingers tightly with mine as we searched for seashells and chased waves. As the sun set in the distance, I trailed my fingers along her cheek, pulling her toward me as I gently kissed her lips. She sighed in happiness, feeling content and safe with me by her side.
I opened my eyes and chanced a look at her. She sat still, quiet, with her head down and her eyes glued to her hands that lay in her lap. Watching her, I noticed the soft pink nail polish on her fingernails, and the way she picked at it. Her fingers were long and slender, a cream color that matched her face and neck, and for a moment she reminded me of a porcelain doll. She sighed, just as she had done in my imagination, and I was instantly overcome with more images.
I saw her walking down a long, rose petal covered aisle, her hair up so that I could see the graceful arch of her neck. The snowy white dress she wore was long and sleek, hugging the curves of her body. One hand clutched a bouquet of deep red roses, while the other was wrapped firmly around the arm of her father. Her fingernails were painted a dark red to match the flowers she carried, and I was overwhelmed by the beauty of her fingers. As I raised my eyes to catch hers, the moment consumed me and I held my breath as she continued toward me. The relief that washed over me as her father placed her hand in mine was like nothing I'd ever felt before—I knew that she was really the one for me.
I jumped a little as the vision faded away, the final image one of me kissing her as we were pronounced husband and wife. When I looked over to her again, she was looking at me. After a few seconds, I smiled the lopsided smile that my mother always said would melt any woman's heart. I hoped that today, of all days, that was true. She smiled back at me as her cheeks began to blush the most incredible and beautiful shade of pink I'd ever seen. She glanced down quickly before looking back at me. As I looked into her eyes, I saw all the things I'd ever wanted for my life, and even more than I'd hoped for. The innocence that radiated from her was refreshing and I wondered who she was, how I had managed to miss her everyday of my life so far.
As we sat staring at one another, people passing between us as they hurried on and off the train, I was overcome by yet another vision. This time it was the two of us alone, in a dark room, as we whispered softly to each other. My lips grazed her skin, reveling in the goose bumps that began to appear on her heated flesh. I was causing them, the way I made her feel was doing it, and the thought of that had me flying. She wrapped her arms around my waist, pulling me closer as I let my hands wander her body, becoming familiar with it as my fingertips skimmed the red lace that she had worn for me. My heart beat faster with each moan, gasp, and hum of satisfaction that came from her. She was what my body craved, what my mind was consumed with, and I couldn't imagine any place in the world I would rather be than with her.
My hands slowly crawled farther down her body, tracing over her breasts, her abdomen, her hips, before gently gliding over her thighs. Our eyes met as I pulled away from her ever so slightly, and the hunger I saw in her mirrored my own. "Please," she whispered as I began to touch her in ways I'd never done before. Her eyes closed and I moved to kiss her, sucking her bottom lip between mine before finally sliding my tongue into her mouth. Our tongues began to caress one another as my fingers pushed into her, causing her back to arch and lift her bare breasts against my chest. As her hand moved along my naked back, curving around my hips and cautiously taking hold of my hardened member, I was jolted from the vision. I willed my breathing to slow down, hoping that no one had noticed, but fully aware of the uncomfortable situation now straining against my trousers.
I silently prayed that she hadn't been watching me as I was swept away in my sudden lust for her, and as I looked back toward her, I was relieved to see her eyes once again trained to the floor. If she had noticed anything, I couldn't tell, though she would most likely think me a pervert or creep by the way I was staring at her, my breathing picking up each time her eyes met mine.
I glanced down at my watch, wondering how much more time I had until my stop, and was disheartened to see that I only had about five minutes left. If I was ever going to talk to this girl, it would have to be now. I only had two more stops until my own, and I knew that if I let her slip through my hands, I'd spend forever regretting it. I took a deep breath, trying to plan out in my head the things that I would say to her. I didn't want to appear desperate, nor did I want to come off as a stalker, but I needed to let her know that I most definitely was interested in her. I wanted to know her, in every way possible, and I wanted her to know me. My brain was screaming that I was not enough for her, that my boring life would suffocate her, but my heart knew otherwise. My heart knew that she was it for me, that I would never love anyone else the way I would love her.
Our eyes met again, and again she smiled, a little wider than before. She was beautiful, breathtaking, and I couldn't will myself to look away from her. Her eyes moved down my body, taking in my suit and bag, my hands and shoes, before finally looking back to my face. She was checking me out, and it excited me. Once again, I shifted a little in my seat, hoping to hide the bulge in my pants that she was causing. She hadn't even touched me or spoken to me, and yet I was more turned on by her than I had ever been by anyone else in my life. Jessica couldn't hold a candle to this girl, and I still didn't even know my Beauty's name.
As I lowered my eyes to her neck, her collar bones, one final vision swept over me. I saw us cuddled together on a sofa, a blanket wrapped around us both, and my hand rubbing over her quickly expanding belly. I could feel the movements of our child under the skin, and the wonder of it was showing on my face. She laughed as I gasped with each kick, each twist of the small little body growing within her womb. Her fingers ran soothingly through my hair, scratching my scalp as I lifted her shirt, exposing her flesh. She squirmed a little, trying to hide the stretch marks she was so worried about, but I stilled her, quickly leaning down to softly place a kiss on her stomach. I loved that she was pregnant with my child, our child, and I had never seen her look more beautiful. Her eyes slid closed in contentment as I continued to look at her, to watch her and love her.
Shaking my head, I snapped back to reality, back to the train car that was quickly approaching my stop. I only had a few more minutes to talk to her, and as I felt the train slowing to a stop, I knew this was the last one before my own. I tightened my hand on the strap of my bag and began to sit up in my seat, preparing to stand. I looked over at her and was heartbroken when she glanced at me one last time and stood unsteadily in her high heels. A wave of regret flashed in her eyes, and she moved to the door, turning back one last time to look at me. I sunk back into my seat, defeated by my own insecurities and inability to talk to her when I had the chance. For a brief moment I considered chasing after her, knowing it was only a few blocks to my office and I could still get there in time. Just as I decided to take a chance, the doors slid closed and I could feel the engines underneath me begin to rumble. I was too late. I had lost her.
I sat dejected in my seat, waiting for my stop. My heart felt as though it had been broken, and I fought back tears that were suddenly stinging my eyes. I didn't cry very often, not even when Jessica left me, but for this girl, this woman I didn't even know, I felt like sobbing. I wanted to run to my mother and collapse in her arms as she soothed me, assuring me that things would be alright. I knew it would be a lie, my life would never be right without my Beauty, but she was gone. I'd missed my chance and I was destined to spend forever alone.
As the train once again began to slow, I knew it was my stop. For a brief moment I contemplated simply staying on the train, riding it until the last stop, then staying on as it turned back to make all the same stops over again, but in reverse. I wondered if she would be on the train again that day, if I could see her once more if I just rode long enough. I had almost decided to chance it, to just wait until I found her again, and then my cell phone rang. I thrust my hand into my pocket, fishing the annoying little thing out and looking at the screen. Alice, my sister. I didn't know why on earth she would be calling me first thing in the morning, but I let out a sigh and opened the phone.
"Edward?" she asked before I could even manage a hello to her.
"Yeah, what's up?" I asked.
"Are you in the office yet?"
"Nope, I'm just getting off the train now, I should be there in a few minutes, why?"
She let out a little huff of annoyance. "Well your new assistant is probably already there, I told her to be early."
"What? What do you know about my new assistant?" I asked, wondering what she had to do with me needing an assistant. She didn't work for my father's company; she worked for a fashion design firm, something she'd always aspired to do.
"Well, I found your assistant, I hired her for you. Dad was busy and asked me to take care of it. She's really nice, Edward. You're going to love her, I promise."
"Alice, I'm sure she'll be fine, but why did Dad ask you to do it? You don't have anything to do with the firm." I began moving off the train car, out into the subway and toward the stairs that would lead me up and back to my boring life, farther away from my Beauty.
She was quiet for a moment, something Alice rarely was. "Well, I told him I had a friend that needed a job, and she's really smart, so he said to bring her in. He liked her, Edward, and I know you will too. I just have a feeling about it. This is gonna be great, you'll see."
I shook my head, quietly agreeing with her as I stepped out onto the open sidewalk and crowds of people moving throughout the city. The cool air once again hit me, and a chill ran through my body. The subway was always warm, hot even, and the difference in temperature was startling.
"Okay Edward, call me as soon as you're done today, I want to hear all about it. And don't forget, we're going to dinner tonight with Jasper. His cousin Bella just moved to town and we need to show her around a bit." I could hear a hint of something in her voice and it made me wonder what she had up her sleeve.
"Alice, this isn't a fix up, is it? You know how much I hate them." I was not excited about the idea of entertaining Jasper's cousin, especially after a long day of training my new assistant.
Alice laughed, "No silly, it's just dinner. She's new and she's very sweet, kind of shy. I just want to take her around a little, show her some of the city. She's starting a new job today and I think she's nervous, I mean she's never lived any place like this before. It will be fun, I promise, and I'm paying so just look at it that way—free food and drinks. All you want."
"Alright, fine. I'll be there."
"Thanks Edward! Have a good day," she said as she began to giggle. She was up to something and I knew it was most likely her thinking I would be a great match for Jasper's cousin. I sighed, knowing that I would most likely not be good company for them after spending the day dreaming about my Beauty from the train.
I continued down the sidewalk until I approached my building, rushing through the doors and toward the elevator. The quiet ride up to the twelfth floor gave me time to think about the day ahead, get my thoughts together before being assaulted by what I knew was coming. The ding alerted me to my reality and I stepped off the elevator car and into the office. Passing by the receptionist desk, I paused for a moment to ask Lauren if my new employee was here yet. She assured me that she wasn't, but that she would send her right in when she arrived. I moved on to my office, closing the door behind me and settling into my desk. Looking out the window, I let the view calm me, and then began straightening papers on my desk. The message light on my phone was blinking madly, and I knew I needed to check them soon.
After putting my laptop bag away and taking off my jacket, I contemplated calling out for someone to bring me a cup of coffee, but then remembered Mike was no longer there, and the new assistant wouldn't know where the coffee was—I'd have to show her. I figured I could wait until she got there, then get myself a cup as I showed her where it was and how I liked it. Just then, there was a light knock on my door, and my heart began to race. She was here, and I quickly moved toward the door, straightening my shirt and tie as I did. Reaching for the handle, I pulled the door open and sighed in contentment as my heart continued to race.
As the door opened, my eyes were overwhelmed with one thing—brown...all I saw was brown. Slowly other things began to come into view, as she glimmered, sparkled, and sighed at the same time I did. Her eyes glimmered, her smile sparkled, and her face seemed to relax as she took in my form before her. Beauty...brown...it was her, and I was finally able to let go.
I saw love before me, and I knew she saw it too.
As the train doors slid closed, I realized something—I got off on the wrong stop. I started to panic as the car pulled away, leaving me a few blocks short of my destination. Fighting back tears, I pulled out the map my neighbor Angela had drawn for me, showing me exactly how to get to work. I had been there a few days before to fill out all that annoying paperwork, but I had yet to go there on my own. I turned toward the stairs and started my way up to the street.
I felt a little pang of sadness for a moment—sadness that I would never get to meet the man on the train. I had seen him get aboard and my heart fluttered at the sight of him. He was beautiful—tall, reddish-brown hair, piercing green eyes, and broad shoulders. When our eyes met, I thought I saw a bit of wonder in his, but he quickly glanced down to the floor, breaking our connection. I wanted to ask his name, his phone number, his astrological sign, but with so many people on the train, not to mention the fact that he was a complete stranger, I didn't. I instantly regretted it and now he was gone forever. The chances that I would see him in this city of over ten million people were zero to none and it made me sad. I'd never had a significant other to bring to an event with me, and as we sat across the aisle from one another, I wondered if maybe he could be mine.
The breeze hit my face as I reached the street, and I quickly ran across the road, camouflaged from the elements by a large group of people. I prayed that I would be on time—that I wouldn't be too late, but the heels I was wearing were working against me. The pencil skirt and kitten pumps were clearly not Bella approved attire, but my new friend and neighbor had insisted I wear them, claiming they would make me look professional and put together. I was somewhat of a klutz and was simply grateful that I had found a job that was something other than waiting tables or dancing on a pole. Me doing either of those things would most likely prove to be deadly, whether it be to me or to a customer.
I hurried down the street and rounded the corner, letting out a sigh as the building came into view. I would have to bake something extra special for Alice to show my appreciation to her for finding me this job. I wasn't sure how she had done it, but after only being in the city for a few weeks and not even getting a call back for any other application I'd submitted, my cousin Jasper's girlfriend found something perfect for me. It was almost too good to be true, but no matter how much I thanked her, Alice simply smiled and told me that it was really her that should be thanking me. I had no idea why, but her smile told me she clearly knew something I didn't.
Alice had invited me out to dinner tonight, along with Jasper and Alice's brother who I'd never met. She said he was great and that she just knew we'd get along. I didn't have the heart to tell her that I wasn't looking for a serious relationship, though I knew that if something amazing jumped up out of no where, I wouldn't pass it up. I was smarter than that, or at least I thought I was. Then the man on the train happened this morning and now I was second guessing myself. I wondered if he'd be on the subway later in the day when I went home. I hoped he would, and this time I would talk to him—no matter what.
I hurried toward the building, pushing through the front doors and silently muttering to myself as I entered the elevator, pushing the button for the twelfth floor, "I hope Mr. Cullen likes me..."
A/N: I don't have any plans of continuing this, don't worry. When jasperlover16 asked me to, I started mentioning crazy Jessica coming back, angry Carlisle flipping out over his son dating his assistant, and over protective cousin Jasper going all whack job on Edward, and she changed her mind, begging me NOT to continue it. Seems like her exact words were something along the lines of "Abort! Abort! I changed my mind, NOOOOO!" Something like that. I think this is better all fluffy and sweet. And you KNOW I can't keep that up for long. :D
Thanks again! Hope you enjoyed it, I was privileged to help out a little bit. :)