jackbauer: so i guess this is the last chapter, huh?

Daisy: Thank goodness, now I can finally stop interacting with y….I mean… yeah, too bad.

jackbauer: It doesn't have to be. We could write more. There's still Jasper and Alice to resolve

daisy: this is edward and bella's story. not jasper and alice's

jackbauer: what about that crackfic we've always wanted to write together? Can we start that now?

daisy: nope. been there done that. I don't really like writing comedy. I prefer emo.

jackbauer: Well do you want to write that Emmett/Carlisle story we brainstormed?

daisy: now you're just making things up. You're too prude to write slash.

jackbauer: I would do it if it meant we could do something together again.

daisy: i think we both need to just move on. the divorce is painful enough without dragging it out.

jackbauer: But you said we could still be friends

daisy: Well there are friends you talk to everyday and friends you occasionally think of fondly when you're bored.


daisy: sigh.


daisy: *eyeroll* stop being so dramatic

jackbauer: (sings) How can I live without you…

daisy: omg stop. This a/n is big and annoying.


Daisy: Is that the phone ringing? I better go.

Meant to be Broken Chapter 3

I was determined not to think about Edward.

I tried not to think of him every time I passed the ultrasound station in the training room. I tried not to think of him every time I camped out at my table at the coffee shop where he had made himself welcome. I tried not to think of him when I studied for Anatomy with his totally anal-retentive study guide. I mean, the boy used charts and color coded everything. It was cute. I especially tried not to think of him when I was with Emmett or Jasper, because surely either one of them would be better for me than Edward.

I found myself trying so hard not to think about him, it was all I had time to think about.

I couldn't fall for Edward. I just couldn't. Edward was an athlete, and athletes couldn't be trusted. He'd proven that when I found he'd known what Jacob was doing to me, but didn't tell me. Was that the kind of person that made a good friend? Still, I'd thought we were friends. I wanted to be his friend, but I couldn't. I needed to stay away from him.

So there I was, trying not to think about Edward while studying my super duper color coded charts on the endocrine system. Jasper sat across from me at the coffee shop, quietly tapping his pen on the table, a highlighter perched like a cigar between his back teeth. I caught him sneaking glances at me, and he just gave me a half grin. I had to tell myself not to think about how his eyes would have been much prettier if they were green instead of blue.


"Yeah, Bella?"

I wanted to tell him that I couldn't do this anymore. I couldn't balance dating around on top of getting over Jacob and thinking obsessively about Mr. Dazzler. "My brain's getting pretty fried. Maybe we should go to Harry's and blow off some steam for awhile." Maybe I needed some liquid courage to actually get the words out of my mouth.

"Sure, I could use some fun," he answered, and we started packing up our things to go.

We made our way down State street to the bar, sliding into the last empty booth in the back. Jasper made his way to the crowded bar to grab us a pitcher, and I sat with my head in my hands. These boys were starting to give me a headache.

I felt a hand gently rubbing my back, and the contact sent shivers radiating down all of my limbs. I felt a small surge of hope and smiled to myself; Jasper's touch usually didn't have this effect on me.

"Thanks Jasper, that feels good. I guess I'm just a little tense."

"Jasper?" a voice which was definitely not Jasper's answered.


Oh no.

My head shot up and I turned to face the eyes I'd been trying to forget. He looked like I had just killed his puppy or something. Why was he always looking at me like that?

"What do you want, Cullen?" I practically spat. He was the last person I needed to see right now.

His hand stopped rubbing my back, and he tensed, his expression falling even more. Great, now I'd killed all his puppies.

"Nothing, I don't want anything. I was just trying to… I mean, you looked so… oh forget it."

He turned to walk away, and before I could stop myself, I reached out to grab the back of his coat.

"Wait, Cullen. Wait. I'm sorry, that was really rude. I didn't mean to snap at you. I'm just a little on edge."

"Edward," he said.


"Please call me Edward. The guys and coaches call me Cullen… I'd rather you didn't."

"Oh, okay. Edward."

He smiled widely and slid into the booth, across from me.

"So, why'd you think I was Jasper?"

"We came in together. He's just at the bar getting a pitcher. We've been studying all day and needed to unwind for awhile."

"You've been with Jasper? My TA, Jasper?"


"The Jasper I introduced you to that time at Greyhouse."

"Well, yes. How many Jaspers do you know?"

"Just the one," he mumbled. His brows furrowed together, and he seemed to be lost in though. I didn't think they were happy thoughts. "How long have you guys been… hanging out?"

"Pretty much since that day. We get together to study and stuff once or twice a week. He's a great study buddy."

"Study buddy… yeah, I bet he's great at studying."


My beer was here.

"Jasper," he greeted him, before gesturing to me. "And Bella?"

"Yeah, Bella," Jasper answered, setting the pitcher and mugs down in front of me and sliding in next to me. He draped his arm over my shoulder, and I was suddenly uncomfortable. Very uncomfortable. Edward seemed to be staring daggers at Jasper's arm, which I shrugged off nonchalantly, leaning forward on the pretense of pouring myself a beer.

"Should I get another glass for Edward?" Jasper asked as he turned to me.

"No, man. Don't bother. I don't want to intrude on… whatever. I'll just get back to my friends," Edward answered before I could.

"Okay sounds good," said Jasper.

"Bye Edward," I murmured trying to sound friendly. "Thanks for checking on me."

"Of course, you know I worry about you," he shrugged. "I'm… glad you're not here alone. You guys have fun."

He was gone before I could say anything else, and Jasper's arm resumed its position around my shoulders. We drank in silence for awhile, making our way through our first and second pitchers in record time. I was feeling lightheaded and flushed, and I was glad for Jasper's steadying arm around me. Every time I chanced a look at Edward and his friends, he was staring at me. The kind of stare that makes your heart rate pick up and caused all the hairs on the back of your neck to stand up. We were just starting on our third pitcher when I opened my big mouth.

"Jasper," I started. I was suddenly grateful for all of the liquid courage, and I took a deep breath before my honesty spilled out. "You know I can't keep doing this. I just...I don't think we want the same things here, and I don't want to keep leading you on."

He looked defeated, but resigned. His arm tightened slightly around my shoulders, and I leaned into him, resting my head on his chest.

"Yeah, I could sense you were feeling this way. I understand."

"I've tried, Jasper, I really have. It's just not… there. You know? I like you. You're kind, sensitive, honest, brilliant… and gorgeous."

"Go on," Jasper said, and we both chuckled.

"I just don't feel it. Whatever it is."

"I know; you don't have to explain. I like you too, but I don't think this… whatever this is… is enough."

I nodded silently, hoping we were through with the heavy talk.

"You ready for me to take you home?"

"No, not just yet. You can go ahead and go, I think I'm going to call Alice and have her meet me down here for awhile."

"You sure? Do you want me to wait with you?"

"No, no don't be silly. I'm sure she'll be here in a flash. And I could use a few minutes alone before she gets here."

I saw Jasper cast a wary glance at Edward, some sort of tense conversation passing wordlessly between them.

"Just be careful, Bella. Please? You deserve better than one of them."

He gestured at Edward's group in general, and I nodded.

"I promise. You don't have to worry. The last thing on my mind right now is another football player."

I was lying, of course. Edward was the first and only thing on my mind right then. Jasper seemed convinced though, offering me one last hug and gentle kiss to my forehead. He slid slowly out of the booth, tossing some money on the table to pay for our pitchers, and turned to walk away.

He stopped and turned.

"Call me soon? I mean… I'd still like to study with you, if that's okay."

"Of course I'll call you. You're a great study buddy," I smiled.

He grinned again before turning and walking out the door. I poured myself another, deciding finishing the drinks alone would be less pathetic than calling Alice down here to mope with me.

I was barely halfway through my first glass when someone slid in across from me. I didn't have to look up to know who it was. The churning in my stomach was almost enough. Add to that the sensation that every inch of my skin was crackling with some unknown energy, and well… I was 99.9% sure that it was Edward.

"What happened, Bella?" he said, laying his hand on mine which was lying flat in front of me, next to my beer glass. "He shouldn't have left you like this. Why'd he leave you all alone like that?"

"I asked him to go."

"You asked him? Why? Did he do something to you? Did he hurt you? If he hurt you, I swear to God… I don't care if he's my TA; he can flunk me if he wants to. I'll kick his -"

"Edward, stop. He didn't do anything except be my friend."

"Your friend? I thought you guys were -"

"No. We're just friends. I mean it's not like we didn't try. There's nothing wrong with him. He's smart; he's good looking; he's sensitive. Any girl would be an idiot not to… Why am I telling you this?"

And why was Edward looking at me like he cared. Ugh! I was completely pathetic!

"You don't have to; I didn't mean to pry," he shrugged. "You just looked like you needed someone to talk to."

"I know," I sighed. "It's just awkward."

"Why is it so awkward, Bella? Tell me why. I thought we came to some sort of truce the other day, but earlier you acted like you hated me again. I...I just don't want you to hate me. I can't stand the thought of you hating me."

His eyes were hard and intense now, and the way he was looking at me was making me feel even more flushed than the beer.

"I don't know," I mumbled.

"Yes, you do," he pushed.

"No, I don't."

"You do," he pleaded, taking my hand in both of his. "Don't lie to me, Bella. Tell me why. Tell me the truth."

"Because you're just like him," I whispered. "You knew. You knew the whole time, and you didn't say anything. Not one word. What kind of person watches that happen and doesn't say anything?"

He dropped my hand quickly, and I regretted being so harsh with him. I knew it wasn't his fault. He hadn't done this to me, Jacob had. But they were all fundamentally the same, and well, I'd made a resolution.

"Bella, I wanted to tell you. I tried so many times. I told Jake you deserved better. I told him if he didn't tell you that I would. He promised he was going to tell you over Christmas break. I didn't want to hurt you. I just...I thought if I told you, you wouldn't believe me or it would warp your perception of me and ruin... I wanted you to find out from him. I was wrong, and I'm sorry."

I didn't know what to say, so I didn't say anything. I just emptied my glass of beer and then the pitcher. Edward never moved his eyes from my face.

"I'm going home," I announced slamming my glass down on the table.

"You're not driving," Edward announced.

"Don't be silly. I don't have a car here. I'm walking back." I started to slide out of the booth.

"No way. It's cold, and you're out of it. Come on, I'll drive you."

I started to argue, but then I remembered how I could smell his cologne in his car and how he had The Sporks on his stereo, and I didn't want to tell him goodbye. It would make me all achy again. We walked out to the car, and the cold air seemed like it wanted to push me over. I wobbled a bit, and Edward grabbed me around the waist steadying me.

I rested my head on his shoulder. Damn, he smelled good.



"Are you sniffing me?"

"Oh yeah, sorry."

"It's okay. I don't mind," he chuckled.

He got me into the car and kept looking at me every few seconds probably trying to make sure I didn't throw up in his car. I wasn't that drunk. I was just a little...tipsy.

The drive to the apartment was way too short. Edward hopped out of the car and came around to my side. He opened my door and held a hand out to help me up. I shook my head no at him. I didn't want to get up. I wanted to stay in his car, and I wanted him to get back in.

"Can you stand up, Bella?" I shook my head no and tried to give him a mean look so he would know I was serious. "Do you want me to help you?" I nodded yes. I wanted him to help me by getting back in the car. He must not have understood my signals, because before I knew what was happening he was scooping me up out of the car. I felt him trying to set my feet on the ground, but I wasn't having that. Walking was overrated. I wrapped my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck holding on for dear life.

"Bella, what are you doing?" Edward sounded panicked.

"You said you would give me ride home," I giggled.

"This isn't exactly what I meant," Edward said uncomfortably as he shifted me a little bit on his waist.

"Giddy up," I squealed and kicked his butt a little with my heel.

I could hear Edward mumbling something, and then he started making his way toward my door.

"What the hell?" I heard Alice's voice and high heels clicking on the sidewalk.

"Shit!" I screeched and let go of Edward who let go of me. I went crashing to the ground landing flat on my ass. "Ouch!"

"Are you okay?" Edward and Alice asked in unison.

"I'm fine," I answered sobering up considerably as I stood.

"Oooookay, I'll just let the two of you finish up whatever it was you were doing," Alice said looking back and forth between me and Edward suspiciously.

"We weren't..." I started to say.

"I don't even want to know." She shook her head, walked inside, and shut the door behind her.

Before I had time to be embarrassed, Edward said, "So, we have an Anatomy test this week." He took a step toward me, and my heart started racing at his proximity.

"Yeah, I've been using your notes," I said barely louder than a whisper.

"I know you already have a study buddy, but maybe you'd like to get together and study each others' anatomy. You know, like compare notes."

But I already had his notes. "Okay." Who cared about the stupid notes? I wanted to study his anatomy.

"So I'll pick you up Wednesday at eight?" He took another step toward me.

"Okay," I swallowed hard.

"Bella?" He started to lean forward until our faces were almost touching.

"Uh huh," I whimpered barely able to breathe with him so close.

He leaned even closer until his lips brushed my ear and whispered, "I really wish you hadn't made that New Year's Resolution." With that he reached down and opened the door for me and then turned and walked back to his car.


I spent the beginning of the week in a daze. I found myself daydreaming about green eyes and the strong arms that carried me to my door. I thought about the way he'd made me laugh when he took me to dinner. By the time he picked me up to study for Anatomy on Wednesday, I was a nervous wreck. Maybe he was different. Maybe he was a good guy. Maybe I was delusional about the chemistry between us, but I couldn't get him out of my head.

When he came to my door, I wasn't sure how I was supposed to act. Were we friends? Should I flirt with him? I decided to just try and be myself. I just wasn't exactly sure who I was. The the whole time we were studying I found everything he said to be hilarious. He brought me to his secret studying corner in the library, and made me vow to never show it to anyone else. We started going over our notes, but he kept distracting me by doodling on my papers or making funny faces. We didn't start out there, but after a little bit we somehow managed to be sitting so close that our arms were touching. I might have been imagining things, but I thought he was leaning over a little more than necessary to compare our notes.

The library was about to close so we started packing up our books. Edward put on his back pack and then took mine from my hand and slung it over your shoulder.

"What are you doing?" I giggled. Giggling? What in the world? I wasn't a giggler.

"I wanted to carry it for you," he shrugged.

"Why?" For some reason I thought it was the strangest idea in the world. There was obviously something wrong with me. Smooth, Bella.

A blush crept up Edward's neck and he shuffled his feet. He seemed embarrassed. In my experience athletes rarely acted embarrassed. "To be nice?" he answered.

"Oh." I looked at the floor and smiled.

"After you." He motioned for the door.

We began the walk back to the car. There was a group of girls walking down the side walk in our direction. "Hi, Edward," one of them drawled.

"Hey," he flashed her a smile and kept walking next to me. Ugh, I always hated how Jacob had all these little groupie girls that liked to flirt with the players. They were almost as bad as the cheerleaders.

We stepped off the curb and couple of guys who had just gotten out a car saw us, "Yo, QB," one of them called over to Edward.

He stopped and turned. "Oh hey, man, what's up."

"Man, those workouts are killing us, man. You've got to talk to coach for us," the other guy said clapping Edward on the shoulder.

They split off into football speak while I just stood there and stood there and stood there. I finally started to get irritated. Then I realized something. Edward was an athlete.

It wasn't like I didn't know it before; I just hadn't realized how typical he was. From the smiling at the giggly fan girls to forgetting I existed the second someone brought up football, he wasn't any different. They really were all the same.

"I'm just going to walk back," I interrupted their huddle, picked my bag up off the ground where he'd set it and started walking. It wasn't far, and it wasn't that cold.

"Bella, wait!" Edward called after me.

I kept going, and I heard him tell the guys he would talk to them later and run after me. "Bella, I'm sorry. There's a lot of stuff going on with the team right now. I didn't mean to ignore you. Please, let me drive you back." He grabbed my arm to stop me, and I snapped it back. I turned around to yell at him, but froze when I saw the desperation on his face. I was stupid for building him up in my mind as something I wanted. I guess it came from years of unrequited football player crushes. I was weak. I couldn't help it, but now I knew better.

"It's no big deal. I just felt like walking. Have a good night." He might not be the one for me, but I didn't have to be mean about it. He hadn't exactly done anything wrong.

"Okay...I guess. I wanted to ask you something though." He tentatively put a hand on my shoulder to get me to stop walking. I stopped and looked at him and my breath caught in my throat. He was awfully good looking. Of course he was; he was a football player! They were all good looking. Well not Mike Newton, but most of them were.

"I was um wondering..." He trailed off and started looking unsure again. "Oh, do you want to study again tomorrow night? Our test is on Friday."

"I can't. I have plans already." I was glad to be busy, because I wasn't sure my hormones could handle another night with Mr. Almost Perfect.

On the other hand, I was also dreading another confusing evening with Emmett. Just because I told Jasper we weren't going to work out romantically, it didn't mean I thought things were going to work out with Emmett. The more time I spent with him, the more I liked him, but as a friend. I just didn't feel a spark.

"With Jasper?" Edward asked with disappointment marking his features.

"No. I haven't talked to Jasper since the other night. I'm going to my friend Emmett's to study," I explained. God, I sounded like a complete floozie going out with a different guy every night of the week. That was really not me, or at least it didn't used to be.

"Emmett McCarty?" Edward asked surprised.

"You know him?" What this some sort of sick joke? Green Eyes knew Jasper AND Emmett?

"Yeah, he's a good guy," Edward said.

"Well, I'll see you later." I did my best to try and give him a friendly smile that hid the disappointment I was feeling.

"Later." He gave me a quick wave and walked back to his car.

I fought the urge to cry the rest of the way home. Why did he have to play football? I imagined what it could be like if he was just a regular guy, but he wasn't. There was a reason I made my resolution. It was for the best. I was just glad I remembered that before it was too late.


"Bells, there's something I need to tell you," Emmett was suddenly very serious as we ate our food the next day. Oh no. Please don't let this be a relationship defining talk. I didn't know if I could bear to hurt this big teddy bear.

"Uh huh?" I took a really huge bite of my burger so I could avoid talking.

"We've been hanging out for a while now." I nodded my head in agreement. "And I think you know I care about you a lot." I nodded again, but felt like I wanted to die a little bit. "Well I don't want anything to come between us. I consider you one of my closest friends."

What? Friends? "Me too," I said with my mouth still full and nodded my head even faster.

"So," he continued, "I really feel like I just need to come right out and tell you this." I braced myself. "I met someone."

"What? I mean oh like a girl? That's awesome!" I cheered and punched him in the shoulder. "Who is she?"

Emmett beamed and answered, "Rosalie, but I call her Rosie. She doesn't let anybody else call her that."

"That's great, Emmett. Tell me all about her."

I spent the next two hours listening to Emmett tell me every detail he knew about Rosalie, and I was really happy for him.

"I can't wait to meet her," I said as it was time to leave.

"I can't wait for you to meet her. Man, I was so worried you were going to be upset. I guess I was a little conceited to think Emmett McCarty being off the market would devastate the ladies," he laughed.

"I'll survive somehow," I sighed dramatically.

"I'm actually going to go meet up with Rosalie now. You wanna come with me?"

"No, not tonight. You go have fun, but I want to meet her really soon."

"Okay, babe. I'll call you." Emmett leaned down gave me one of his famous hugs.

I felt like a weight had been lifted my shoulders as I walked home from my dinner with Emmett. He seemed happy, and I got to say friends with him. Everything seemed to be working itself out. My mind wandered back to Edward and what he was doing tonight. I found myself wishing I was with him studying for our test or at least talking to him.

"Bella?" I heard a female voice call out to me.

I turned toward the voice and was surprised to see Leah standing there. "Leah?"

"Hey, I wasn't sure you'd remember me. I mean you got pretty plastered that night," she teased and caught up with me. We were walking the same direction.

"Very funny. How have you been?" I asked her.

"I'm really great. I, oh well I broke our resolution." She flashed me a huge smile.

"What! You're back with Jacob?" I asked horrified. She seemed like a nice girl. She deserved better.

"Oh no. Hell, no, girl. I'm dating one of the defensive linemen. Do you know Sam?"

"Same Uley? Of course. He seems cool."

"He is, oh and he told me all about Edward and Jacob. Girl, please tell me you broke your resolution, too."

"No way. I'm keeping it. Wait, what do you mean told you about Jacob and Edward?" I was confused.

"The whole team is talking about their little fight over you. According to Sam, Edward found out Jacob had been hanging around the training center trying to catch you and talk to you. Edward told him back in January to leave you alone, and basically threatened him."

"Yeah, I was there, but that wasn't in January, that was just a couple of weeks ago," I interrupted.

"Oh, no, I heard about that too, but this was way before that. Sam said that time, after Edward found out Jacob was still trying to bother you, he pretty much kicked his ass at practice the next day. Now Edward always goes up there when you're working to make sure Jacob leaves you alone. I'm not sure if that's stalkerish or sweet. All I know is that the boy has it bad for you."

"No way, Edward and I are barely friends," I argued. This was all sort of blowing my mind.

"Bella, don't be so naïve. The whole team has been giving him grief about it."

"I don't know what to say," I admitted.

"You don't need to say anything to me. You need to find that man and confess your undying and love and devotion to him before he slips away. He is a good guy. Any girl would kill to be in your place."

"You don't think he's just like the rest of them? Like Jacob?"

"No way, they are like the sun and the moon. No comparison," Leah said adamantly.

After I left Leah, I wandered aimlessly through the campus trying to make sense of the mess in my head. I remembered Alice's words. Do you feel the ache? I felt it with Edward. I couldn't deny it. He made me laugh. He was smart. He worked hard. He didn't seem privileged or arrogant. He went out of his way for me time and time again. Why couldn't I date him? Because he liked to talk about football? I spent my whole life talking about football. When did that become a bad thing?

That stupid resolution. I thought back to every other New Year's resolution I'd made. I had never lost that five pounds. I still didn't balance my checkbook. I never went to volunteer at the homeless shelter. I was pretty sure I was never going to get over my fear of heights by bungee jumping. New Year's resolutions were meant to be broken.

Besides, Edward was there for me when I needed him. He had protected me from Jacob, and I owed him for that. The least I could do was give him a chance.

I found myself in front of the library. What a coincidence. Edward just happened to mention that he would be studying for Anatomy, and I was hoping he was in his secret studying library corner. I mean I thought I might as well look since I was already there.

I would just stop in and say hi. Maybe see what he was up to. He might need help studying or color coding his notes. If he didn't need help, he could always help me study. Maybe he was hungry and would want dinner. I wasn't hungry, but I wouldn't mind watching him eat. I didn't really care what we did; I just needed to see him. Things between us had changed. I wanted to find out exactly what that meant.

I walked to the place we'd sat last night, and my heart was pounding in my chest. I was scared and excited to see him. As soon as I rounded the corner, my face fell. The table was empty, except for a single piece of paper. I picked it up, and saw that it was one of Edward's anal retentive color coded study guides. I ran my fingers over his handwritten notes on the side of the page. Even his handwriting was beautiful.

Maybe he needed this page of his notes. I wouldn't want him to miss any questions about the Neural Integrative. I looked down at what I was wearing. A Purdue sweatshirt with a hole in it and chucks. Not exactly the best way to make a first post-epiphany impression. I decided to run home to change and then go by Edward's apartment.

I practically jogged back to my apartment and was coming around the corner toward my door when I ran into someone coming around form the other direction. We hit each other hard, and started to fall back. He caught me by the shoulders, and before I could even look up, I knew who it was. I didn't give him a chance to let go. I wrapped my arms around his body and hugged him tightly. He seemed hesitant for a second, but then moved his arms around my back and squeezed. "What's this for?" he breathed into my hair.

"I'm just so happy you're here. Wait, why are you here?" I finally let go and looked up at him.

"I came by to see if you were home yet. I needed to talk to you." While he was talking I reached over and grabbed one of his hands. His eyes grew wide as he looked down at them.

"I was just about to go by your dorm," I smiled up at him.

"Really, why?" He beamed back at me.

"I found one of your study guides. You left it." I held it out to him and his face fell.

"Oh, and I wanted to try something." I moved my hand up to his neck pulling him towards me and tilted my head up towards him.

It took him a second, but as soon as he figured out what I was trying to do, he smiled again. He cupped my face with his hand and started to lean down, but then he froze.

"Wait, what about your resolution? I really like you, but I've got a scholarship to think about and…"

"I'm breaking it," I said impatiently.

"Are you sure, because you seemed pretty adamant about it the other day, and I…"

"Will you please shut up and kiss me!"

"Okay," he whispered and his eyes were full of desire as he finally closed the distance between our lips. That achy feeling Alice kept telling me about started to grow in my stomach again.

It hurt so good.

A/N: Thanks for reading and supporting me during this difficult time in my life. This is the end of our little story that led to the end of our fic marriage. I will never forget my first fic love….

You should read Daisy's story Underexposed, review it, and tell her what a huge mistake she made. I love shabbyapples…. Smooch. Thanks for betaing profmom72.