A/N: This one's been sitting in my misplaced notebook for three years, now that I've found both it and a job hopefully life will return to my writing hobby as well. Thanks for all the reviews on all my fics they got me off my backside at long last.
Rule 113 a.k.a. 'I've been hustled'
Ibiki, your Jounin vest should not be neon orange and pink, however many bets you have lost.
"So sensei, care to make a little wager?" Kotetsu asked.
Ibiki perked up, now gambling was a vice even for shinobi, but what better way to teach his Genin this than to indulge them just this once? And if he were to get richer doing it, well it couldn't be helped, could it?
"How much?" he asked.
"You have to wear this Jounin vest," Izumo produced a sickeningly orange and pink monstrosity, only the most attention-starved ninja would wear, but hey, Ibiki had this in the bag.
"Deal, what's the bet?"
"Iruka here," the last member of the team was indicated. "Will go and make out with Anko-"
"No way! Nu-uh what do i look like? A sucker?"
"-He'll make out with her smack dab in front of Kurenai 'I'll castrate any Pervert' Yuhhi, who won't twitch a muscle."
"I"M IN! Hope you boys bought vests your size."
Ibiki was stunned.
In front of his very eyes, Iruka, the shyest Genin this side of Mars, was making out with Anko Mitarashi. In front of Kurenai Yuuhi and all the 'Ice Princess' did was sigh and shake her head.
It was due to this state of mind, Ibiki maintained, that he agreed to 'double or nothing' stakes only to lose as Anko dragged Iruka off to ravage him with nary a protest from her friend. or his Genin for that matter.
Rule 118 a.k.a. The 'Going once, going twice ' rule
While we empathise with your desire to be free of your genin, Ibiki, you are not entitled to auction them off to foreign nations.
"Our first lot today is one Konoha Genin, slightly used. This Genin comes with excellent references. he can be used for any and all D-Ranks, but is especially good at feline related missions as can be testified by Tora a member of the Fire Daimyo's family."
"Sensei," Iruka interrupted only to be drowned out by Ibiki's patter.
"And for today only, you can get his team-mates free. Take home the complete set, ladies and gentlemen!"
Izumo and Kotetsu who'd been chortling at his plight till then, froze in shock.
"The bidding will start at a 1.00 Ryo."
"1,000 Ryo!" shouted the Tsuchikage.
"2,000 Ryo! I need genin to spot my sons while they work out. Mine are too traumatized or worn out. This is gonna be a real test of 'The Will Of Fire'." The Raikage bellowed.
"4,00 Ryo!" yelled the Mizukage. "Do not worry Iruka-kun, our love is worth more than mere money! And I'll save your little friends too!"
"I have 4000! Do I hear 4,500?" Ibiki yelled, ignoring his charges' green faces. "No? Very well, 4000 going once... going twice... sol-"
"All right, break it up! break it up! This auction hasn't been sanctioned. Move along unless you want to spend the night in a comfy cell." Shishui Uchiha interrupted, backed by the might of the majority of the Konoha Military Police.
'Damnit!' Ibiki thought as he watched the grumbling diplomats disperse, the Mizukage looking especially put out. ' I was so close, so close to freedom!'
Chapter Soundtrack- Just Go by Lionel Ritchie ft. Akon