The Dance

An Alternate Scene for 'Carpe Jugulum'

This is part of my crusade to increase the number of Agnes and Vlad fanfics out there, because hardly anyone writes about them. Please read and review.

Disclaimer: Discworld and all its characters and locations belong to Terry Pratchett, not me.

'Do you dance?'

'Not to bands this bad...'

'Not even for me Miss Nitt? Surely it wouldn't be so bad?' A smile.

Agnes struggled to own up to the fact that she did not have the grace for dancing, but Vlad's arm had already snuck round her waist, and his other hand held hers. As she blushed and Perdita screamed at her Vlad smiled.

'Look dancing is easy,' he whispered conspiratorially. 'And we would make such a handsome couple.'

He began to dance. To her surprise Agnes seemed to be able to dance quite perfectly. It was as though an alien presence had taken control of her body. Perdita tried to grab her attention at this point, but Agnes could focus on nothing but the fact that the most attractive man in the room was dancing with her.

'See? Isn't this just so civilised? I think I will enjoy Lancre. Uberwald is so very backward.' He was still grinning.

'Perhaps.' Agnes murmured. Her thoughts, encouraged by Perdita were having difficultly making themselves coherent or useful. She was uncomfortably aware of his touch, and the way he filled her personal space. The pink fog clouding her brain didn't help. And where was that priest?

'Something wrong?'

'Mmmmm? Nothing,' she managed.

He was frowning slightly. After that his face relaxed into another smile. 'You know you really are completely different from anyone else I have ver met. So...layered.'

Was that a compliment or an insult? The band really was terrible-there were no songs just a lot of noise...

And her and Vlad dancing...

How the hells was she managing to dance? The pink fog swirled gently, telling her not to worry as long as she kept dancing...

They twirled onwards.

'Why are you worrying about vampires? I thought I told you to forget them?' He whispered in her ear. His words smoothly cut through the racket of the ballroom, seemingly without effort.

'When did I mention vampires?' She tried to smile. The words sounded colder than she had intended.

He twirled her round. When the twirl had finished she was much closer to him than she had been before. She thought he must be able to hear the pounding of her heart.

'You didn't.'

This was getting weird. Not only was a handsome man dancing with her (amd he was handsome, he was so handsome) dancing with her but he was also reading her mind.

Out of the corner of her eye Agnes saw Nanny Ogg staring at her. She studiously ignored it. That only drove her attention back to Vlad. Pink fog swirled in her mind still. She fought to clear it then stumbled in mid-step. She felt Vlad's hand tighten on hers to stop her falling, with apparent ease, and without missing a beat himself.

He was smiling even more now. His smile really did make him seem even more handsome, but there was something strange about it.

'Dear Agnes, you seem distracted, are you quite sure there is nothing wrong?'

'I...I don't know.' The truth accidently spilled out. She managed to get a grip on reality to see a concerned expression on her dance partner's face.

'But everything is fine tonight, You do know there's no such thing as vampires?'