Olsen's Secret Life



Disclaimer: I still own nothing about Hogan's Heroes, unfortunately. They just come out from time to time to play.

I want to thank all my betas for this story, Waikiki, ColHogan, and Bits and Pieces.

Colonel Robert Hogan finished changing out of his black sabotage clothes and into his American Army Air Corps uniform. He and his men had just come in after setting explosives for a train carrying munitions due to arrive in the morning, a short distance from Stalag 13. "Let's get upstairs and try to get some sleep, we have roll call in four hours," he told his men while trying to rub something out of his eye.

"Oui, mon Colonel, it's been a long, busy couple of weeks," LeBeau answered yawning.

"Yeah, and we still have that other job that London wants done this week. They're going to have to give us a break; six jobs in two weeks are too much. Boy, when it rains it pours around here," Carter replied, hanging up his sweater.

"I'm with you, sir. I'm dead tired. Sure hope Newkirk gets better soon to help us out some," Kinch said, trying to stifle another yawn. "Sir, are you all right?" Hogan was scratching his leg.

"Yeah. Something bit me. No big deal. I'm sure it'll be gone in the morning," their commanding officer responded, then climbed the ladder leading up to barracks two. His men following close behind. Hogan softly walked over to Newkirk's bunk, reached down, and felt his forehead; he was still running a slight temperature which Hogan didn't like. Hopefully the penicillin London dropped the day before would do the trick. Newkirk started to move a little, but settled down when Hogan pulled the blanket up and tucked it in around him. Behind him the rest of his team were quietly climbing into their bunks, falling asleep quickly. Hogan bid them goodnight and then went into his office. About the time his head hit the mattress he was out.

The following morning, Schultz came into the barracks waking the occupants in what seemed like only moments after they'd closed their eyes. "Raus, raus, everybody, time to get up!"

"Schultzie, give us another hour," LeBeau requested as the guard hit the side of his bunk to wake the men.

"I can't do that, the Kommandant is in a good mood today," Schultz answered. "Up, up, up, everyone get up!" he continued to bellow.

"I don't care what type of mood he's in. I'm sleepy," Carter responded slowly sitting up.

"If you boys weren't up to monkey business all night, you wouldn't be so tired. What am I saying? I know nothing! Nothing!" Schultz answered then walked over to check on Newkirk.

"Why's Klink in a good mood?" Kinch asked as he started dressing.

"I don't know. He doesn't tell me everything. Newkirk, how are you feeling?" Schultz asked shaking him gently to awaken the corporal.

"'Ello," Newkirk responded in a weak voice. "Is it time for roll call?"

"I'm sorry that I have to make you come outside, but the Kommandant insists. Perhaps Colonel Hogan can try to speak to him again and get you out of roll call until you're better." Schultz truly didn't want to make him move. He knew gunshot wounds were painful, even though it happened during their 'monkey business', he worried about the men under his charge. Schultz had been bringing them some supplies to help care for Newkirk.

"It's okay. I'm getting up," he said sitting up slowly. Newkirk tried to stifle a moan from the pain radiating down his arm. Fortunately the bullet hadn't shattered his collar bone, but Wilson had a difficult time removing it. Schultz had walked in during the 'surgery' and nearly passed out at all the blood.

LeBeau handed him some aspirin and water, it was all they had for the pain except for the morphine London had sent. Unfortunately, a shot of morphine wouldn't allow him to make roll call. "Thanks, LeBeau," Newkirk smiled gratefully.

"You're welcome. How are you doing?" The Frenchman asked with worry written all over his face.

"I'm all right. Carter, can you give me a hand getting ready?" He asked standing up gingerly.

"Sure thing," Carter answered as he finished buttoning his shirt. He then proceeded to help Newkirk dress.

"Roll call in five minutes!" Schultz said one more time then looked around confused. "Where's Colonel Hogan?" Walking over to the Colonel's door, Schultz knocked and yelled. "Colonel Hogan, roll call!"

"I'll be out in a moment, Schultz," Hogan responded without opening his door.

"Officers," Schultz said rolling his eyes, and then reminded the prisoners to be outside quickly as he left.

Hogan walked out of his office and poured himself a cup of cold left-over coffee, making a face as he took a drink.

"I'll make a new pot right after roll call, mon Colonel," LeBeau said watching his commanding officer's reaction. "Are you feeling all right, sir?"

"I'm fine," Hogan gave him a quick smile. He didn't feel fine, but didn't want to worry his men. They'd had a long week and everyone was tired, plus they had another job in a few days to accomplish which he still needed to plan. LeBeau's coffee would help when it was ready. Looking around at his men to make sure everyone was ready, he asked. "Newkirk, how are you doing?"

"I'm better this morning, sir. Nothing to worry about," the Englander smiled following the others out for roll call. No one believed him.

Schultz did his count, finishing as Klink came out of his office yelling 'repooooort' in too chipper a voice. The guard reported all prisoners were present and accounted for.

"Very good, Schultz. Now prisoners, our illustrious Luftwaffe thwarted another attempt by the foolish Allied air forces last night as they attempted to bomb an important war plant outside Hammelburg. Our new ack-ack batteries made shreds of the enemy aircraft. Over twenty planes were shot down. No doubt new prisoners will be arriving sometime in the next few days," Klink gloated as he informed the men. Boos and hisses were heard from among the ranks. "You shouldn't look upon this as a bad thing; it means the war will be over that much faster. The Allies will realize the futility of fighting and lay down their arms in defeat."

Hogan stood there listening to Klink's babble. He was having a hard time keeping his eyes open without fidgeting. Normally he'd never have this type of trouble, but he was just exhausted and the Kommandant was going on and on. Suddenly, black spots started appearing before his eyes. Hogan took some deep breaths trying to push the darkness away. Then his head started to swim as it took all his concentration to hear what Klink was rattling on about. His words sounded like they were in the distance and moving farther away.

"Colonel Hogan, don't you agree?" Klink was saying. Hogan didn't answer or even look up at him. Angrily, he walked over and stood near his senior POW officer. "Colonel Hogan, I said, don't you agree?"

Unbeknown to anyone in camp, stealthily stalking through the woods, a man approached the fence of Stalag 13. He'd been able to avoid the patrols and made it within a stone's throw of the fence. Arriving at his destination, he crouched behind a tree stump and looked at the Allied prisoners. Spotting the person he was looking for, he took careful aim with his rifle and then fired into the crowd of men who didn't deserve to breathe German air.

Instead of answering the Kommandant, Hogan collapsed to the ground as the bullet from the first gunshot hit him in the head. The second shot came so quickly no one had time to react as Newkirk went down with a cry of pain. All the prisoners, Schultz, and Klink dove to the ground as several more shots hit the earth near them. The camp's guards moved in to subdue the lone gunman.