A/N: Last night, I listened to this song. Today, I decided to write about it. I'm sorry that it's so sad. But it's not my fault. It's the song's fault. I just happen to love the song. ;-)

*** I still have the scars ***

I've been to hell. And back. Not once. Not twice. Not … Well, I've lost count somewhere somehow. Maybe I did it on purpose. Maybe it was just a reflex, a kind of self-protection.

They've taken everything away from me. They? TPTB. The powers that be. Or at least, that's what some people – like Jarod – call them.

I've been knocked down and stepped on

Cut right clean down to the bone

This road has been a hard one

I still have the scars they all show

My father.

"Daddy" has hurt me so many times. He's ignored me. He's lied to me. And he still called me his angel. He let them hurt me and he himself hurt me on purpose. He wanted to break me. He wanted to make me his own personal huntress.

He hasn't learned a thing. But I did … even if it took me way too long. The little angel has grown and lost her wings.

I still have the scars.

I have been betrayed and double crossed

Deceived by the ones I love most

And it is hard to trust in anyone

When you've been burned so many times before

My mother.

I would have given my life for her. But in the end, she was the one who gave her life to protect others. Well, that's what she had intended to do. She shouldn't have done the things she's done. If she hadn't been so damn selfless, she might still be alive. She wouldn't have let me down. She wouldn't have left me.

She's dead. And what did it teach me? Love leaves and you can trust no one. Even your so called loved ones can betray you any minute.

I still have the scars.

Ain't it funny how the story goes

Always getting high, still feeling so low

The scars on my body may heal

But not the ones in my soul

Well, ain't it funny that Daddy's little angel has tried everything to fly high and be adored and all she's done in the end is landing with her feet on the ground with her head not even close to the clouds?

I've tried so many things to earn his love. But he hasn't shown any mercy on me.

I've tried to make my heart shut up with Scotch and cigarettes – and other things when I was younger.

I've tried to numb the pain with other kinds of pain.

I still have the scars.

I've been turned around and lost before

And didn't know which way I would go

And it seems sometimes I'll never find

A place where my heart can come home

When I got closer to Jarod as a child, when I told him my secrets, when the scars started to be healed, "Daddy" sent me away.

He wanted me to be taught life's lessons.

But all they could teach me at the schools he's sent me to was that I wasn't like the other kids. I wasn't one of them and I would never be.

I was lost and I had no idea who I was.

I tried to be one of them. I hid the parts of my soul that didn't fit in. I cut them off.

I still have the scars.

It's been that way with me, always in between

The bad mistakes and the heartbreak I've known

The scars on my body may heal

But not the ones in my soul

I returned to the Centre after more than a decade.

I had expected that I would fit in. And again I tried to be a part of the so called Parker legacy.

I've done horrible things. And I wanted to forget them. So I drowned them in shots of Scotch and nights spent with men.

But all it got me were days spent in hospitals. My ulcer. And other scars.

I still have the scars.

The scars on my body may heal

But not the ones in my soul

Sydney still tries to talk to me about my "problems". He's always wanted to help me. But I know better.

Because I still have the scars.

The End

A/N: The song will always belong to Rosey Carter, June Carter Cash's little Wildwood Rose.