Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters.
Okay, firstly, sorry for my lack of updating. Honestly, FanFiction is not really that high on my list of priorities right now, not to mention that I haven't even felt inspired to write lately (You can blame a messy breakup for that. Dirty, rotten cheater… So, if you are going to hate someone, I beg to you hate my ex, not me!)
I have a very important violin audition coming up (If I make it, I'm going to NY!) and I'm playing in qualifiers for a nationwide junior golf tournament… Busy me. I'm going to camp soon, but I promise you wonderful readers that you guys are still important to me and I will get updates up, even if they take me a while.
Edward and I have been enemies since the day we met. Sure, it sounds cliché, but it is true. Edward was always the boy everybody loved, he got tons of girls, whored himself around, which made his reputation even better in the eyes of this particular school. He got the perfect grades, was rich, the star quarterback on the varsity football team, and to top it all off, Edward was unbelievably hot. I hated him with a passion. The thing that made it all worse… he had no weakness.
Jacob and Edward have had each other as enemies since Kindergarten. I moved to Forks in the eighth grade, and sure enough, Edward certainly caught my eye and I thought I caught his as well. But a girl like me could never get so lucky. As soon as I moved here, Jacob Black began befriending me, explaining to me the complicated social rules of a town so small. Too late, I would figure out that he liked me way more than I liked him. Something he would tell me only after I needed it; he never mentioned Edward.
Since Edward and Jacob had been enemies for so long, as a simple rule they always tried to outdo each other, whether it was the pranks they pulled or the girls they dated. Knowing that Jacob liked me, Edward used me to get back at him. He asked me out two months after I moved to Forks.
While I went out with Edward, it all seemed great. I loved hanging out with Jasper and Emmett, his two best friends, both of whom seemed to have a mutual feeling. Jasper's sister, Rosalie, and I became very close, being the girls who every other girl envied.
Four months later, Edward broke up with me. I assumed it was for Rosalie until he started whoring himself around, which as I heard, was much like before I even moved to town. The break-up was more than cruel. It was awful, disgusting, emotionally scarring, embarrassing, and by far the most horrendous thing that anyone has ever done to me.
I walked with my head held high, with a level of confidence that I never had before. My lunch tray was filled with food that I would not eat, because every school lunch is the same thing; brown mush that looks like it was once green, pizza with pepperoni so sticky you can throw it at the ceiling and it will stick, and chicken nuggets that bounce like rubber balls.
Smiling, I took my seat next to Edward. My face fell as soon as I heard the nasty, squishing sound beneath me. I got up to find the brown and supposed to be green mush all over the seat of my pants and spread around directly below me. There was no way it could have wandered there, it was placed. I turned back around to grab a napkin when my own tray was flung upward toward my face; courtesy of Jasper.
Covered in food that wasn't even edible, I began to tear up. I got up from my seat and slipped on the red Gatorade spilled beneath me. I couldn't hold it in anymore. I burst into tears. Edward got up as to help me up and offered me his hand. When I took it, he let me go halfway up. I fell again. Everything hurt.
Edward and Jasper began to laugh. "Did you honestly think that I," Edward motioned to himself, great and mighty and towering above me, "would ever like someone like you?" I nodded meekly as he began to laugh harder. "Look at yourself. You are an ugly, clumsy bitch who doesn't even know her place in this town yet! Well, here's some advice." He paused, figuring out the wording of his next insult. "Lesson number one: We have social classes here… and you will never be good enough to get into one higher than theirs." He pointed to where Jacob and a few of his friends sat. I saw Jacob clench his fists. "Lesson number two: I used you. If you're not careful, I'd do it again too."
Emmett looked at me with a look of genuine sorrow on his face for me. He hadn't contributed in any way to my humiliation, but he didn't try to stop it either. Rosalie wasn't at lunch.
I was sobbing freely and I needed desperately to get out of there. I got to my feet, without slipping again, and ran into the girls bathroom, where I stayed for the rest of the day.
Rosalie came in the bathroom and smiled at me. "Get out," I said. She looked at me curiously.
"Bella? What happened? Are you okay?" She asked. I told myself that she was only feigning concern.
"You know perfectly well what happened!" I screamed. "Leave me alone!" Wide-eyed, Rosalie fled the bathroom. Searching through my backpack, I found exactly what I was looking for, my pocket knife. The blade hesitated above my wrist, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I sat like that for who knows how long, the knife just a hair away from breaking skin. Could suicide be better than this? When the whole world is against you, is it worth it to live?
Three hours later, someone knocked on the door. "Bella, it's me Jacob. Will you please come out? You've missed all the buses, but I can drive you home." I opened the door at the first sound of Jacob's comforting voice. He hugged me. He wasn't worried about getting anything on his clothes. "Let's get you into some clean clothes and you can just hang out at my place for a while."
I smiled. "That would be great Jake. Thanks." Jacob did just as he promised and more. He explained to me everything. He told me about Edward and his ways and he told me about them being enemies. It was then that I decided that Jake and I would be the greatest of friends.
As it turned out, Rosalie never did figure out what happened on that day. And to this day, I'm sure she still doesn't know. I've seen her around, but never more than just a few glances at each other in the hallways. We don't have a single class together and we haven't since the year we met.
Dazed, I took in my surroundings. It was pouring rain and my truck was the only truck left in the parking lot. School obviously must have ended. It wasn't late, but the clouds cast a dark color over Forks, making everything dimmer and harder to see as I looked around. I tried to turn my car on, only to hear the engine rev a little and then followed up by an engine failure. It looked like I was walking home. I looked at my phone again.
I called Jacob, Embry, Quil, Leah, and Emily, only to go straight to voicemail on every one. If I recalled correctly, they were at the La Push beach. I thought I was going to go, but I, no doubt, was not getting there without a running vehicle. I slammed my hand against the dashboard and screamed, letting out a bit of my frustration.
I got out of my truck, not bothering to lock it; there was nothing of value inside. Putting on my thin, black jacket, pulling the hood up, and stuffing the keys in my jeans' pocket, I began to walk home. I kicked the tiny pebbles on the sidewalk, frustrated and angry with myself.
Rain hit the ground from the overhead gutters in rivulets, making the problem of the flooded sidewalk worse. My hood was doing the bare minimum of keeping the pouring water from touching long hair but I can't say the same from my face. And as the wind blew harder, it forced the hood from my hair, so not even my hair was protected from the rain. The little makeup I wore was, I was sure, streaking my face with rivers of black, silver, and blue. I was getting water down my shirt, where the jacket didn't zip up all the way and my shoes were already soaked in mere seconds. I could feel the soggy soles squishing beneath my feet.
A familiar looking, silver Volvo pulled up alongside me. Oh fuck.
The window rolled down. I walked faster… but there was no denying that I heard the voice that called after me.
"Bella!" Millions of thoughts raced through my mind.
My options were limited.
1. Take my chances and run.
2. Take my chances and get in His car.
3. Take my chances and actually turn around to talk to the devil himself.
I was not in the mood for taking chances. Edward's car pulled up closer. I wrapped my jacket a little tighter around my slender waist and turned to where his face was close to the open window.
"What do you want Edward?" I asked, having to yell over the sound of rain and thunder.
"Get in the car Bella; you're going to freeze." It wasn't a question, but rather a statement, a command. I looked around; was anyone watching? He reached across his car to open the door for me. "Get in." I hesitated for only a moment before stepping into his heated car.
I closed the door behind me and shook out my dripping wet hair, smiling to myself as Edward chuckled lightly.
"Yeah, thanks for that Bells," Edward said, wiping the water droplets from his face. "And buckle up your seatbelt. I won't let your death end up as a black mark on my record."
"Because humiliating me in front of the entire student population of Forks Middle School is a whole lot better." Edward grimaced.
"I apologized," he stated harshly.
"An apology is really going to make up for that Edward!" I yelled. "I thought about suicide that day! I thought the whole world was against me. I was going to do it right there in the girls' bathroom. My death was almost a black mark on your record." I glared at him. "Let me out of the car. Let me out of the car now." He shook his head and he pulled over. He leaned over the center console in the car and grabbed my shoulders.
"Bella! Never think about that again! Suicide is never worth it and I have seen enough accounts of it to know. My dad is a doctor and seeing all those kids, kids our age, coming in either dead or close enough is a terrible thing to see. They had their whole lives in front of them and now their lives are over. They ended it with one mistake. You can't take something like that back, Bella. It's never worth it, not matter how you feel at the moment."
"Edward, did you ever think that I'm not the first person to have thoughts like that because of actions you and your little posse did yourselves? You, and everyone like you, could be very well the reason those kids, kids our age, committed suicide!" His already pale face paled even more. He was paper white; it looked as if all the blood had drained from his face.
"Bella…" he whispered, his hold on my shoulders loosening. "Bella, I'm so sorry, you have no idea. I will never forgive myself for what I did on that day, for causing you to have the thoughts that you did."
"Funny, I probably won't forgive you either. And you know what? That day caused changes in me. Had Jacob not come in, I would have followed through with the action plan I had in my head. But I changed, Edward. I became the girl you see now, hardened, sarcastic, loose, and bitchy, all because of that day. I'm not that innocent little twelve year old girl who was once infatuated with you anymore."
"No, Edward. I'm not talking about this anymore." He nodded and pulled back onto the road. After a long silence, he was the first to speak.
"Rosalie misses you still, you know. She never gave up hope on you. She still wonders why you screamed at her that day."
"Well, I won't be the one to tell her. If you and Jasper had any conscience at all, you would both tell her why she lost me as a friend and why I still refuse to speak of any of you, even Emmett."
"Emmett and Rosalie aren't to blame…'
"Maybe not Rosalie because she wasn't there, but Emmett did nothing to stop the two of you." I jumped out of his car the second he pulled into my driveway, eager to dodge the rest of this conversation. As I slammed his car door, the realization of what exactly happened that fateful day finally hit Edward. He rolled down his window and called out to me as I was about to walk in my front door.
"Bella is what my friends call me. And you, Edward Anthony Mason Cullen, are not my friend," I yelled back at him, slamming the door to my house behind me.
I hated Edward Cullen.
With a fucking passion.
Well, I hope you guys liked this chapter and I hope to have updates up sooner in the future. Anyway, thank you wonderful readers for not giving up on me and holding on to this story and I hope you all are having a lovely summer!
Please review! I would love to know your thoughts! :D