Chapter 4 – Dream a little dream. Later that night;
Chapter 4 – Dream a little dream.
Later that night;
The air was tinted with the scent of roses; looking to the vase standing on the dresser next to me where I was sat; they were my favourite colour of yellow and they were from 'him' – the love of my life. My heart still fluttered at the thought of him, my flesh felt alive as if he were touching me with those long skilled fingers; his touch as soft and light as a feather floating through the air, his lips like lava against my own – I was in love. I was happy and I knew that he was the man that I was going to spend the rest of my life loving.
Unclipping the decorated pins in my hair – I brought my attention back to myself. It had been a long day of visiting with people, who were held in high regard publically. My Father was a highly successful and decorated Judge – it meant that all social gatherings were to be attended by the whole Family, with absolutely no exceptions.
Being the daughter of the infamous Judge meant that I was promised to a man of my Father's choosing. It didn't matter whether or not I wanted to be with this man or not, I was betrothed; end of discussion. My husband to be was a high end attorney who seemed to be at least 20 years older than I was – every time he looked at me; I would get a sliver of disgust simmering down my back. Beady little black eyes, long black hair that was always held back in a tight pony tail when he wasn't in court, a bicycle handlebars moustache that curled upwards and made me want to vomit. In all honesty, I hated the man – he was after something and marrying me seemed to be a part of his bigger plan. There was absolutely no way on God's green earth that my Parent's would accept Liam; the true love of my life. Being a carpenter meant that my Parent's thought of him as beneath us. In my eyes – Liam was everything; he was the air that I breathed, he was the water that I needed to survive, he was the water that cleansed my body and he was my heart beating strong in my chest.
Looking at the flowers once again, I placed my nose against the bud and breathed in the strong scent of nectar. They were more beautiful than anything that I had ever seen. Just those calming and tranquil green eyes that shone with nothing but love when we were together – that wide smile that always made my knees knock together. Whenever my thoughts turned to him, I was left smiling like an idiot and now was clearly not different.
Brushing my long auburn coloured hair; I was smiling like a challenged person. I couldn't help it....I was in love, sometimes however, I couldn't help but wonder if what Liam and I were was something much more than lovers. It wasn't something that had a name but all I knew was that I had never seen or been around anyone who was as deeply connected as Liam and myself.
"There is nothing in this world that can keep us apart," those were the words that Liam had whispered to me last night just before I had sneaked back into the house.
Was that true? Were we destined to have nothing if we couldn't have one another? The thoughts were running rampid through my mind and all I could think about was making love to Liam, feeling the firmness of his body, the tender touch of his fingers and the roughness of his kiss; as if he hadn't been able to contain himself a moment longer to have my lips against his.
Looking up my eyes landed on the man who I was supposed to marry – he was standing in my doorway just watching me; his beady little eyes glancing over the little clothing that I was currently wearing. My skin broke out in waves of shivers; disgust rose in me as his eyes lingered around my chest and he licked his lips as if I were a stuffed pig on a banquet table. Now that he was here, I had no idea on how I was going to get out to meet Liam – he clearly wanted to just watch me and that in itself was creepy beyond belief.
"What do you want?" I asked insolent but not really caring; the quicker this man realised that I wasn't going to bow down to him, the easier it would be on everyone.
"Do you think that I do not know?"
"Know what?" I asked getting up and reaching to the bed for my robe to hide the rest of my body from view.
"That you are laying with a man not worthy of your attention or time!"
"You know nothing......."
"I saw you last night," he spat at me, the anger in his voice rising to a dangerous tone, "do you think that I was just going to sit back and allow my wife to be, to act as if she were a whore?"
"Whore? You know nothing about me, you know nothing about the man that I was with last night......"
"I know that he is beneath you.....that he is not worthy to even breathe the same air as you......"
Anger built in me – I didn't have the same principals as my Father, I didn't look at people and judge them by class or social standing. To me everyone was equal, everyone had the right to be treated with respect and dignity. To hear this man that I was supposed to be marrying; I felt sick – I couldn't commit to someone with that type of principles; it just wasn't me and I wasn't going to change for anyone.
It really upset me to think that this man – this creepy guy was stood there trying to tell me what was good for me and what wasn't good for me. This man, William, didn't even know who I was. There had never been a moment when he had taken the time to get to know me; Hell we hadn't even had a proper conversation that hadn't been around my Parent's.
"How dare you......you don't even know him!" I charged angrily placing my hands on my hips and glaring at him.
"I know that if I can't have you then no one else is going to have you," he spat venomently.
"What are you talking about?"
Every instinct in my body told me to run, that I wasn't safe in here with this man – I couldn't get out – he was stood in the doorway, which was the only exit out of my room. The window wasn't even an option; there were wrought iron bars placed outside the glass – living in London in this time, wasn't safe for anyone least of all a girl living on her own. Slowly my body moved backwards as William started walking towards me.....my gut instinct was screaming at me now; I was about to die.
Liam was due to arrive in a little while, maybe an hour so I knew that it wasn't likely that he was going to charge in and save me. I wasn't exactly equipped to fight against a man who was at the very least a foot taller than me and built like the side of a house. There was a dangerous glint in this man's eyes and I was backing up on the far wall of the room quickly; soon I would be trapped in the corner with absolutely no where to go........'
What the Hell was that?
My heart was beating quicker than the beat of a thrash metal tune and the sweat was still coming from me. Pushing back the covers, I stumbled to the hallway and down to the kitchen where I poured myself a glass of nice cold water hoping that it would indeed cool me down.
The images were still flashing in my mind; the man named William; looking at me with that dangerous look. My skin was back to crawling from the creepy feeling that had been present in my dream.........or memory, whatever the fuck that had been. Reaching for my smokes, I lit up and inhaled deeply in the hope that it would also assist on the fact that I needed to calm down.
I had never experienced anything like this before; I had the usual dreams and nightmares of being chased by demons or bad guys; never anything that had been this vivid and played out so consecutively before. It had flowed like a memory and it had come to the point where, thankfully, my mind had woken me before I could experience my own death – or what had felt like would be my own death. Grabbing a handful of kitchen paper towels, I placed it under the facet and then placed the cold cloth to my neck. This was insane – this couldn't be real and the more that I thought about it the more it seemed like a crazy idea. Picking up the phone I dialled the number of the only person who could help calm me down.
"Hello?" my Father answered almost instantly.
"Hey Daddy, it's just me," I smiled remembering how much he had loved me and how important he had been while I was growing up – and just like that, with only one word from him, I felt myself begin to calm down.
"Hey pumpkin, how's things? Are you alright?" he asked slipping into papa mode instantly.
Sitting down at the dining room table, I smiled and finished my cigarette while we caught up with one another. It had been a couple of weeks since we had talked so we had a lot to get caught up on with one another. By the time I got off the phone, I felt comfortable and relaxed enough to actually go back to sleep.
Crawling into bed, I pulled the covers up and let my mind wonder – at least the dream had managed to take my mind off Jeff for a while; that had to be something. The whole night with my best friend, we had talked about him and what would happen if I saw him again. Now that I was lying here alone in my apartment – my mind wondered back to him and what had been between us. Those green eyes, that beautiful smile and the firm body; now that would have me having some very pleasant dreams that were for sure.
The same time;
The same time;
Glancing at my reflection in the mirror of an expensive store, as I moved along the busy street, I was wearing what could only be described as a very old style suit; almost Victorian in style, a top hat framed the top of my head and the bunch of flowers in my hand had me remembering that I was on my way to see 'her' – the love of my life, the woman who had stolen my heart without even trying too.
Victoria – the name was embedded in my head and my heart; she was like a vision every time my eyes found her. Long auburn hair that was like running my hands over expensive silk, gorgeous blue eyes that shone without any sign of judgment, which was something that most people in her standing had when they looked at me. In their eyes, I was just a servant, hired to help them with their decorations and building. Victoria had never once looked at me like that – she had the kind of mind that I had thought could never exist. With her, she had taught me about so many things and most importantly; she taught me about humanity and humility. Because of her, I never judged people and I never looked down my nose at them just because they weren't in the same 'supposed class' as I was.
It tore at me to think that the woman I was so desperately in love with was intended to marry someone else – even if she told me that she felt nothing for this other man, it still stung to know that her Family would never accept me as the man who would die for their daughter. I had seen the way they looked at me; there was a faint sign of disgust in their eyes whenever they caught me looking at their little girl, but it couldn't and wouldn't ever stop me from being with her.
We had talked a lot about running away together, we had wanted to just pack up a little amount of our belongings and just flee; but we had no idea of where to go because of her Father's influence, we suspected that it would have to be abroad somewhere but neither of us were very worldly. Unfortunately tonight was the night that we would have to decide because time was ticking by a lot faster than either of us were willing to admit and the date in which she was to marry her Parent's choice of partner was closing in and there was no way in Hell that I was going to allow her to be taken away from me by someone who knew absolutely nothing about her.
Usually I hated walking along these streets in this part of town; mainly because I knew that people were looking at me as if I were some kind of leper – I didn't belong in their sector and they knew it. In the distance I could see Big Ben standing above the city telling me for sure that I was in London. Couples were walking past looking regal and proper; their cloths costing more than my entire home – they had no cares in the world. There was no one to tell them that they couldn't be together and they took that for granted. It made me sick to the back teeth just thinking about it.
As I neared the street where she resided, I was drawn to the large puff of smoke rising in to the gray sky – it was weird, living in London, it was rare to see a blue sky; the weather was so completely unpredictable and you just got used to the miserable weather. My heart quickened when I realized that the smoke was indeed coming from her street. My feet picked up quickly as I raced towards her; hoping against hope that she wasn't in trouble. I don't know how I would cope if I lost her – the flowers I had been carrying were long gone; discarded in my attempt to get to her.
"Excuse me," I pushed my way through the small crowd of people who had formed around outside her home – it was her house that was on fire.
Victoria was home, I knew that she was because it was our time – the same time every night that we met up. My stomach dropped and I was sure that people were talking but all I could hear was an underwater type of drone – everything was muffled and my heart was now pounding violently in my ears.
I was unceremoniously pushed back and away from the scene; my eyes were drawn to the window where her bedroom was and I could see her – the outline of her body thrashing against the window in desperate vain to get out. Those stupid bars had been attached to the windows at the request of her Father to ensure that nothing could get into the house in the middle of the night but now they were preventing her from getting out and away from a fire that was sure to cause her a long and extremely painful death.
Once again, I rushed against the men; battling to try and get through their barricade but they quickly took me down and restrained me against the wet pavement. My heart was thundering as it shred into a million tiny pieces, my breath was coming quickly and in a more urgent state than I had ever experienced before – the world was crashing in around me and the more that I tried to get up, the harder the man behind me pushed his knee into my back to restrain me.
"Please no......someone has to do something...........she's going to burn to death; please someone help her!" I groaned at the pain in my back and in my heart. No one said a word to me; the atmosphere was eerily silent apart from the banging on the window up on the 3
Struggling against the men's restraint, I looked up to the window to see that it had been completely consumed by the fire – she was gone, she was nowhere in sight and there was no way that she could have survived that kind of destruction. I gave up and allowed the men to hold me down, I didn't want to fight now; I had nothing to fight for – my whole world had slipped out of my grasp and there was nothing for me here anymore..........'
The air in here was so humid that it felt like I was choking on every breath that I was trying to drag into my lungs, so I flung my legs out of the bed and reached for my jeans, Lizzie was instantly on her feet happy to be going somewhere or happy to having something to do. I padded down to the kitchen and slid open the French doors that led out on to the patio. Gasping in breath after breath, I felt myself begin to calm down and the sweat started to pass. I was still slightly freaked out by the fact that I had no idea where that dream, or memory, or whatever, had come from.
"What you doing up so early son?" my Dad asked rounding the corner of the house.
My Father; the one man that I had depended on completely throughout my life. It wasn't unusual for him to be around real early in the morning; he would be up at the crack of dawn, sometimes earlier, and he would start all his chores, which usually consisted of him coming down to mine and Matt's place to check that everything was ok. Personally, I had the feeling that he just hadn't gotten used to the fact that I was going to be home for a long while.
"Just a weird dream is all," I replied pulling my cigarettes out of my pocket and handing one to him as he climbed up on to the patio with me.
"Anything you want to talk about?"
"No......yes......no; it's cool, I'll figure it out," I replied holding out the lighter to him so he could light his own cigarette – he always smoked rollies said that they were easier for his throat. I personally couldn't smoke them; they were too tough on my throat.
"Well if you change your mind, you know where I am son,"
"Thanks Dad," I took a seat at the outside dining table, "what about you?....what are you doing up so early?"
"I don't know – I woke up and just couldn't get back to sleep; it's a weird one,"
I was extremely lucky; after all the times that I had supposedly messed up, I had always had the love and the support of my Dad and my brother along with our friends, who were really more like Family to me than anything else. The world around me meant absolutely nothing if I couldn't have them by my side and everyone knew that.
"So what are you planning on doing today?"
"Well I was going to go down to the farm store and pick up some bits and pieces for the veggie patch and then I have a ton of gardening to do......so that should take up most of the day,"
For a man of his age; he was surprisingly spry; he was always on the go and he hated just sitting on his ass doing nothing. I think it came from the years of discipline that he had put in on the tobacco fields – it just became a way of life for him and he hadn't slowed down even when he retired.
"But what about you? Matty mentioned something about a girl......."
"When did you talk to Matt?"
"Last night; he popped in by on his way home,"
Figures; my brother couldn't keep his mouth shut for anyone or anything, especially when it came to my love life. It was like he was always on the lookout for some way to tease me or embarrass me. Heaven forbid I should do the same to him though.
"It's nothing.......I probably won't even see her again anyway,"
"What makes you say that?"
"I just.........we don't really run in the same circles is all," I admitted honestly.
When Shannon and Matt had left mine the previous night, I had sat and thought about Roni for a long time – the images of her, the scent of her still lingered on my nose and sound of her voice was like bells chiming, which sounds corny as Hell I know but it was truly the only way that I could describe her.
"What does that have to do with anything?" my Dad asked watching me closely to see if I was going to attempt to lie to him, which he should know by now I wouldn't – because every time I had tried to lie to him in the past; he had called me on it, "you and Gina didn't run in the same circles when you 2 met......."
"And look how that ended up?" I sighed heavily.
"Not every relationship is doomed to end badly son,"
"No I know it's just......"
"There was something weird......when I looked at her and when we talked; it was like......forget it – it's stupid....."
"If you felt it, it isn't stupid now tell me......maybe an old man like me might be able to help,"
Taking a deep breath, I explained the feelings that I had when I had been around Roni yesterday – the way it had felt so natural to talk to her, like I had been doing it for years and the way her eyes had spoken to me – telling me that I would be loved and cared for with her. It was all so strange but so intense at the same time that trying to explain was making me frustrated – more because I just couldn't get my head around what had happened.
Maybe I was over reacting and maybe I wasn't – the only way that I would only be able to really tell was if I saw her again and got talking to her. Only then would the mystery be cleared up.......hopefully.
R/N - THANK YOU guys so much for the warm welcome that you have given this fic so far; y'all blow me away with how much you support me. So as always; if you want more then please just leave me a comment or review and I will work hard to get the next chapter to you. Love you guys.