title: sakura tries to kill naruto
author: ohwhatsherface
characters: Sasuke, Naruto, Sakura, Kakashi
note: If by any chance you stalk my writing journal, you'll know this is sort of a re-post. Sort of. Anyway, this is the start of an anthology of little Team Seven (I'd say 'genin' but Naruto and Sasuke still are). As in when they were still cute. And when it was Team Seven, not The Epic Bromance That Is NaruSasu.
disclaimer: Don't own. Duh.



"So," Kakashi drawled, idly flipping to the next page of his book, "is someone going to tell me what happened?"

Standing in front of him were Naruto and Sakura, looking frantic and a bit guilty respectively. Naruto's arms were flailing about as he tried to express with words what had happened. Sakura, on the other hand, had her arms crossed and was tapping her foot, frustrated. Sasuke was leaning against the wall, not getting involved with the situation.

"Anyone?" Kakashi prompted.

"I did nothing wrong." Naruto and Sakura both cast Sasuke annoyed looks of back off.

Kakashi turned the page. "Yes, yes, Sasuke, we know you had nothing to do with—"


"WHAT?!" Sakura glared at Naruto, while her jaw dropped in utter disgust. "You make it sound like I molested you."

Naruto briefly pouted back at her before looked at Kakashi, pointing at Sakura accusingly. "I KID YOU NOT, SENSEI—"

"OKAY—I tried to smother Naruto." Sakura's lips her pursed and her fists were clenched. "He was—I..." She sighed, defeated. "Yeah. Okay. I'm not going to lie. I fully tried to murder Naruto."

Kakashi seemed amused.

Sakura grabbed Naruto's finger and twisted it painfully. "I did not, however, take advantage of this idiot."

"Then why did you try to kill him?" Sasuke inquired, a bit enraptured—secretly, of course—by this more evil side of Sakura.

Kakashi nodded. "Yes." His single eye seemed to reflect disappointment in her. "I would've expected this from Sasuke, but not you, Sakura," he said sadly.

Briefly, Sakura contemplated turning this situation around and getting the attention away from what her teammates were most likely dubbing her 'homicidal tendencies'. She could easily pout and ask Kakashi why he didn't expect her to attempt murder on Naruto. Really, that was just unfair! Was she not good enough or something?! She really should've.

But she didn't.

"He wouldn't shut up!" Sakura cried hysterically. "If he wasn't rolling around and flailing, then he was snoring loud enough to shake the inn, and then if he wasn't doing that, then he was talking. TALKING." She tucked her hair behind her ears mostly as a way to keep her hands busy (and away from Naruto's throat). "He was sleep talking, Kakashi-sensei. About ramen. And it was creepy. AND LOUD. AND ANNOYING." Sakura pulled at her hair. "Kakashi-sensei, I had to do it!" she whimpered, looking at him pleadingly.

At her glassy eyes, Kakashi sighed. If he just said "okay" and went back to his room, leaving the little genin on their own, Sakura was surely going to try killing Naruto again. And it wasn't like Sasuke was going to defend the blond, so there was only one other option.

"Alright, Sakura, you can sleep in my room. I'll stay here with the boys," Kakashi said, sounding a bit defeated.

"R—really, sensei?" she asked. The shock and hope on her face almost made him feel guilty for making her room with Naruto and Sasuke, something he certainly shouldn't have felt guilty about. "I can have a room all to myself?"


"Oh, thank you so much, Kakashi-sensei!" Smiling widely, Sakura grabbed her bag and ran into the bedroom that had formerly been Kakashi's, shutting the door behind her.

When they heard the lock turn, Sasuke scowled at Kakashi. "You realize that she was faking it, right?"

Kakashi turned to him. "Hm?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Sakura's slept through Naruto's snoring before, Kakashi." He cast the blond a dirty look. "We all have, actually. She just wanted your room."

As Naruto snorted at how he 'just got totally pwned', Kakashi looked at the closed door and sighed.

That conniving little bitch—

Er, that sweet little girl was going to make a great kunoichi one day.




You can tell it's fiction when Kakashi notices Sakura has mad skills. :D
OKAY SORRY. I know I make bashes at Kakashi and Naruto and Sasuke a lot.