Will you be there
As I grow cold?
Will you be there when I'm falling down?
Will you be there?
Skillet- Will you be there
I had no clue what I was going to tell Edward. I couldn't possibly tell him that I was a hardcore drug addict. He probably already thought I was on something, so would it really hurt if I told him? I could tell him how good the drugs made me feel. How nothing could make me feel as good as the drugs did. How they were my escape from this pitiful world. God, stop joking yourself Bella. I mentally scolded myself.
"Ummm, I go to Forks High." I mumbled.
"Really? My sister Alice goes there." Was Edward's reply. I could not believe that sinister bitch was related to Edward. She has literally mad my life a living hell and here I am with her angel of a brother actually having a conversation. Why must God hate me?
"Do you know her?" Who doesn't know of Alice. She is one of the biggest bitches in school is what I wanted to say.
"Yeah I guess. I've spoken to her a few tines."
"Really? She's never said anything about you."
"I guess we aren't friends. Merely acquaintances." I mutter. "Actually she kind of hates me." But I don't think he heard that last part.
"So who do you call your friends?" He probed.
"I really don't have friends. I mean there are a few people I speak with, but I don't really consider them friends. So, why don't you attend glorious Forks High?"
"Well I go to school in Port Angeles. I attend Wagster's School of Performing Arts. It is pretty challenging, but I know it will help me get into Julliard. Lauren goes there too." Of course perfect Lauren would go there.
This boy had some major goals. I felt like some insignificant piece of dirt compared to him. Edward had his whole life planned out. Sure I had some pipe dream of maybe attending college, but I knew that college wasn't in the cards for me.
In this moment I envied Edward. He had nothing holding him back from reaching his dreams. He was brilliant and beautiful. He probably had very little demons haunting him compared to me. He was perfect in every way while I was perfectly flawed. "Wow those are some pretty big goals." Was my weak reply.
"What do you plan on doing with the rest of your life Bella?"
"I'm not really sure yet. Right now I'm taking life day by day. I'm letting the adventure of this crazy world play out for me."
"So you don't have any real goals planned out for yourself?" He inquired.
"I mean I have a few things planned out. The one thing that I'm absolutely sure about is that I want to get out of this pitiful town the second I can."
"Why do you want to leave?" This boy was relentless. I didn't know this had turned into a game of twenty questions.
"There is nothing that this town has to offer me." Was my reply.
"Really? I can't wait to leave either. Julliard would be such a great opportunity for me. I really hope Lauren and I get accepted." Again with Lauren. Gag me with a spoon.
A few minutes passed before I heard anything. "Hey Edward." Chirped a hauntingly familiar singsong voice from behind me.
"Alice! I thought you weren't going to be able to make it today." Edward excitedly said while getting up.
"I thought I wasn't going to make it, but a few things I had going on wrapped up a bit early, so I decided to drop by and give my favorite brother a visit."
"I'm so glad you're here." Edward told her.
"So am I. Who is your little friend here?" Alice asked.
"Oh! This is Bella Swan. She goes to your school and says she knows you."
"Lovely to see you Isabella." Alice said with a forced smile.
"Its always a pleasure seeing you too, Alice." I replied with what I hoped looked like a genuine smile. Alice took the seat next to Edward. The next few minutes were spent in an uncomfortable silence until Edward finally broke it.
"Well I'll be right back I'm just going to throw this stuff away."
"Okay." I said. Edward left and it was just Alice and I.
"You know Lardella my brother may like you, but I'm never going to like you." Alice blurted out. She continued to bash me. "Edward may not see the real you, but I see you for who you truly are: a pathetic waste of space. You will always be a loser so stop trying to win. Stop trying to get with my brother to try and make yourself seem cooler. You are just a charity case for him. Edward doesn't really care about you he just feel sorry for you. And if by some odd chance of fate my brother actually likes you I will do everything in my power to bring you down. Stay. Away. From. My. Brother. Got it? He's with Lauren. She's ten times better than you'll ever be." Ouch! That really hurt. I thought Edward was my friend. Just then Edward appeared.
Once the conversation started flowing I stayed quiet mulling over the things Alice had just told me. Was I really just a charity case to him? I hope he thinks a little better of me than that. Yes he saved me from killing myself, but what does that make us?
He's my knight in shining armor; even if I didn't want to admit it to myself. Those words Alice said to me actually cut deep. Which is completely surprising because Alice's words don't usually bring me down this much. It actually felt as if she stomped on my heart.
I just want to know what I did to make her hate me so much. Why couldn't she just give me the time of day? Maybe if she actually got to know me she would like me. Who am I kidding? Alice doesn't like anyone without an amex. All she seems to care about are the materialistic things in life. If her hair is done perfectly, if her clothes match accordingly to her outfit. Secretly I wish I could be more like her. You know all girly without a worry in the world.
And I knew Lauren was ten times better than me. She was perfect in every way I wasn't. She's talented, beautiful, smart, blonde, and last but not least she had Edward. This world was cruel. I was dealt the bad hand at life. All I was good at these days was getting high. To think I used to have goals. I used to have a passion for music and art. Now my only passion was when I'd get high next. I wish I had an easy life like her. To have everything handed down to me on a silver platter. To be blessed with good genes and grace.
But how dare she accuse me of getting close to her brother to be cool. That is absurd. Her brother was probably one of the kindest creatures out there. Yeah, and to think I wanted to be like her. She was a bitch. She was cold. She didn't care who she hurt to get what she wanted. She was one of Rose's disciples. She was the enemy. I couldn't want to want to be like her. She's not a good person. She may have what she wants, but she will never have a true friend. I had been thinking about all of this for well over ten minutes when Edward said, "Well everything is about over now, but I have to stay and help clean up. I'll walk you to your truck first Bella. Bye Alice I'll see you at home." And with that Edward and I were on the way to the parking lot.
"That was interesting." I blurted out.
"What was so interesting?"
"Nothing." I mumbled.
" You know that I heard what Alice said back there right?" Edward said.
"You caught that?"
"Yeah I did and I apologize for Alice's rude behavior and I hope you know everything she said isn't true."
"No Edward she is right. I'm not a good person. You may think you know me but you don't. I don't even know why you would want to know me. Heck if I were you I sure wouldn't want to know me. I'm not good Edward.
"Bella I can see that your a good person and I never claimed that I knew you, but I hope you give me the chance to get to know you."
"I said you don't want to know me. I'll see you next Sunday Edward." And with that I hopped into my truck and left Edward Cullen to get my next fix..
Can someone please review to let me know they're reading. Pretty please. I know the song doesn't fit the chapter that well but if you think hard enough it fits almost perfectly.
Don't forget to review.