Blood of Metal

by Lord Dragon Claw

Disclaimer: Be nice to your teachers.

Note: Several omake after the Author's Notes.

Chapter Two: "I'm Impressed" by They Might Be Giants


Finally, it was the day that the graduates were assigned their teams. For the most part, Naruto had zoned out until he heard names being called out that were somewhat familiar.

"Uchiha Sasuke..."

Naruto snorted at his name. The Last Uchiha (which apparently was a legitimate title; stupid, ignorant villagers) was one of Naruto's least favorite people, particularly because the boy thought he was better than everybody else.

"... Hyuuga Hinata..."

A shy girl from the most prestigious clan in Konoha. Naruto knew about the fact that there was the Main House and the Branch House in the clan, but many of the Branch members seemed to like to sneak onto the Inuzuka compound whenever Naruto performed there. Odd.

"... and Nara Shikamaru..."

Ah. The lazy boy in the class. So lazy that he got the lowest scores because he couldn't be bothered to put forth any effort.

"... are Team Seven. Jounin-sensei is Sarutobi Asuma."

Really? The second son of the Hokage was taking a team? Interesting.

"Akimichi Chouji..."

The largest kid Naruto ever met. His clan, famous for being gourmets and physically powerful, were rather laid back and never bothered him. They also didn't take any active interest in the blonde guitarist either.

"... Aburame Shino..."

The stoic one. Sometimes Naruto wondered if the boy had any emotion at all. Knowing what he did of the Aburame Clan, the guitarist sometimes wondered if it was the bugs that controlled him, rather than the other way around.

"... and Haruno Sakura..."

A medic in the making if there ever was one. If only she could get over her "fangirl" phase, and it wasn't just that she was pining after Sasuke either - she'd get herself killed if she didn't put more effort into training.

"... are Team Eight. Jounin-sensei is Yuhi Kurenai."

Not a name Naruto had heard before. Of course, he didn't know most of the higher-ranked ninja's names anyway.

"Team Numbers Nine and Ten are still active."

Oh? So these number designations are an official code then, otherwise they would just reassign the numbers every graduation.

"Yamanaka Ino ..."

There was a chick who was tolerable - not too much of a fangirl like Sakura, but also not too shy like Hinata. Also, it kind of helped that she didn't like Sasuke too much anymore. But was that why she started wearing black leather instead of her purple dresses?

"... Inuzuka Kiba..."

Naruto's best friend. Enough said.

"... and Uzumaki Naruto..."

Go me, thought the blonde as Kiba clapped him on the back.

"... are Team Eleven. Jounin-sensei is Mitarashi Anko."

Eleven, huh? Why does that number feel right?
... Wait... Mitarashi? That name rings a bell. Oh yeah. The civilians spoke of her with the same hatred they spoke of him. Didn't she get promoted from Special Jounin recently?

"That's it for all the teams. You have an hour to get lunch and to meet your team members before your Jounin-sensei show up - you will be meeting them here in this classroom, so don't be late. Good luck to you all!"

With that, Iruka left the room with a wave.

Shino, who had been sitting directly in front of Naruto, turned around.

"Uzumaki-san, what is your take on the team configuration?"

"You're asking for my opinion? Why?"

"You seem to have the Hokage's confidence, or at least a better understanding than the rest of us would have as you are in the Hokage Tower so often."

"Ah," Naruto replied as he thought about it. "Well, Asuma-sensei is the Hokage's son, and a genius of battle, and so he was put in charge of the scions of the two most prestigious Clans. Hinata is there for target detection, Shikamaru for capture or immobilization, and Sasuke for assault, which I only admit grudgingly."

Shino nodded.

"My team... Well, I only know very little about Anko-sensei, but she is an assassination specialist. Ino has skills in interrogation and infiltration, probably in seduction as well, whereas Kiba can track and detect targets as well as make quick kill-strikes. I am in the team for my combat ability, and for the fact that I get along with Kiba so well."

"Understood."

"I know nothing about your Jounin-sensei, sorry. But Chouji is in it for combat and capture, you are there for detection and information gathering, and Sakura is in it probably for genjutsu and/or medical jutsu. Any other teams there were... I didn't pay enough attention for the names; sorry about that."

"Thank you for your assessment," replied Shino. "The only info I have on Kurenai-sensei is that she was only recently promoted. Anko-sensei has many rumors running around about her, and she was apprentice to one of the Sannin. Orochimaru, to be specific."

"Thank you for the information," responded Naruto politely before Shino got up and left to go eat.

"Quick kill-strikes?" asked Kiba, pleased with the compliment.

"Yeah, you're good in short skirmishes, but in a protracted battle you would tire easily."

Kiba nodded. "And that's why you are there, to take over in case I miss."

"Hadn't thought about it like that, actually," said the guitarist. "But yeah, I can see it."

"So, our Jounin-sensei was apprenticed to Orochimaru once... wonder what she's like."

"Probably bitter about the stigma surrounding her."

Kiba nodded, filing the information away as important.

By then, most of the rest of the rookie ninja had left the room, including Shino. Now it was just Team Eleven left - Ino, Kiba, and Naruto.

Ino was drumming her fingers on the desk she was sitting at.

"Dude," said Naruto. "Ask her to come to lunch with us."

"You think I should?"

"Yeah! Get goin'!"

Kiba got up and walked towards the back of the classroom, where Ino sat. Naruto didn't hear what Kiba said, but he definitely heard Ino's response.

"FUCK NO! It's bad enough that I have to be on a team with you two! So no, I don't want to eat lunch with you, especially since I'm trying to watch my figure!"

Naruto used kawarimi with the chair next to Ino so he was behind her. He put his hands around her leather-clad waist, eliciting a shriek from the girl. He slung her like a sack of potatoes over his left shoulder, opposite his axe/ax.

She got pissed and began cursing like a sailor, but Naruto just ignored her until she ran out of breath.

"If you are planning on being an active ninja, you're going to have to eat enough to keep your energy up - so you're having lunch with us."

"PUT ME DOWN!" she yelled, punctuating a command with a kunai in Naruto's right shoulder.

"Ow," Naruto stated sarcastically. He had found out earlier that day that his pain tolerance was much higher than it was before by accidentally rolling out of bed onto his kunai pouch.

The fact that the guitarist didn't care that he had a kunai wedged in his flesh unsettled the other two.

Naruto began to carry Ino off, but noticed Kiba wasn't following. Turning, he asked if Kiba was going to eat or not.

"Y-yeah. I'm coming."


Along the way, Ino apologized for stabbing Naruto after he finally put her down.

"It's just that I'm still not quite over what Sasuke did to me when he finally rejected me outright."

"Like I said," he began, pulling the kunai out from between his collarbone and shoulder blade. "I don't mind. I've recently discovered that I have a high pain threshold."

Oddly enough, his shoulder began to itch for a bit.

"Kiba?" she began.

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry for snapping at you."

"It's okay. Do you want to talk about what happened? I listen to my sister rant when she's had a breakup. Though it is different, you might need to talk about it."

"I'd rather not, actually," she replied.

Kiba nodded.

"So where are we going to eat?"

"Well," began Naruto. "I promised the owner that I'd bring my team around for lunch after I became a ninja."

"Oh?" wondered Ino.


Ichiraku Teuchi smiled as he saw his favorite customer walking down the street towards his stand. Naruto was such a nice boy, despite what the idiot neighbors said. This time, not only did he have that Inuzuka boy with him, but a girl too! Must be his new ninja team.

Naruto, true to form, had a new hole in his black leather duster coat, but in his shoulder, oddly enough. His blood-red shirt was new, and looked to be foreign-made if the fox-face design on it were to be any indication; seemed that the boy knew what his status in the village was, and wanted to let everyone else know it too. His shoulder-length blonde hair was messy as ever, and Soranagi was as well-kept as ever. His hitai-ate (forehead protector) was worn in the traditional fashion - on his forehead - making the boy look remarkably similar to the Yondaime Hokage.

Kiba was wearing his usual black leather jacket open and had Akamaru, his little dog, sleeping on top of his head. His mesh shirt showed off his advanced physique and his clan tattoos, and his hitai-ate was also worn in the traditional fashion. He was twirling a kunai in his fingers as they walked.

The girl looked somewhat different, but she fit perfectly with the "black-leather look" the other two had going. Her ankle length skirt was made of leather and had brass studs in it to weigh it down somewhat. She also wore a leather sleeveless shirt with a mesh undershirt whose sleeves reached the arm bracers she wore on her forearms. Her hitai-ate was being worn as a belt. She also had her hair in a high ponytail, and from the swaying of it, it seemed like she had a few kunai hidden within it. Clever. Probably had lockpicks serving as bobby pins in her hair too.

"Welcome," Teuchi said to the three new ninja. "Brought your third teammate today, boys?"

"Yeah," responded Kiba.

"Wait..." began Ino. "Ramen? Do you realize how many calories are in one bowl!?"

"Do you realize how many calories you burn tree-hopping?" replied Naruto. "Or how many you use for kawarimi?"

"Uh... no."

"You need this many calories just to keep up with most other Genin."

"O-okay," she sighed. "I'll have a pork bowl, please."

"SIMPLE PORK!" Teuchi declared to the back.

"SIMPLE PORK!" echoed Ayame, Teuchi's daughter from the kitchen.

Kiba holstered his kunai. "A chicken bowl with a side of diced beef for Akamaru, please."

"CHICKEN HATCHING A COW!"

"CHICKEN HATCHING A COW!"

Ino looked at Teuchi like he was insane.

Naruto thought about it for a minute before ordering. "Two beef, one miso, and one pork for starters, please."

"NARUTO SPECIAL SEVENTEEN!"

"NARUTO'S HERE!?"

"YUP!"

"GOT IT! SPECIAL SEVENTEEN!"

"Wait, Naruto has his own order code?" asked Ino, a little perplexed.

"All my regulars do," retorted Teuchi with a smile.


They met back at the classroom to find that the other handful of teams who passed hadn't yet been picked up by their Jounin-sensei yet.

One by one, the Jounin showed up and took their teams with them, until only Team Eleven was left.

Soon, Naruto noticed movement outside the window, before the glass was smashed in by a large, black object. It suddenly unfurled, revealing itself to be a banner which attached itself to the ceiling and floor by its corners with kunai. The banner read:

"The Very Sexy Mitarashi Anko
"Jounin-sensei for Team 11
"Still Single
"And Horny, Damn It!"

The three Genin nervously sweated at this, but what really caught their intention was the black-haired woman standing in front of the banner. Her pupil-less, light brown eyes seemed slightly maddened as she stared a challenge at the three younger ninja. Her tan, leather trench coat was open, revealing that she was wearing a full-body fishnet suit that was mostly opaque, with a dark orange skirt over it. Her hair was done in a spiky ponytail, held back by her hitai-ate, which was otherwise worn in the traditional fashion. On her legs were studded greaves.

"Any questions, maggots?" she suddenly asked. Kiba and Ino were intimidated, though Kiba wasn't as much. Naruto...

"Why is my first instinct to attack you now and ask questions later?"

Anko blinked for a moment. She then laughed; it was a laugh full of genuine mirth, though it was rather short.

However, when she stopped, her eyes showed annoyance and more than a little real insanity.

"Predatory instinct," she declared, releasing a little killing intent. "I am the bigger predator here, and you will respect me as such. Follow me to the roof if you want to live."

Naruto found that his head was nodding "yes", though his legs were not following. He realized that while on the one hand, she could easily give five good reasons to follow her... on the other hand, no one else was leaving the classroom. They were paralyzed with fear.

Naruto pushed himself to take steps towards the door to the hallway, his determination giving his teammates courage to also move.

As he walked, he was inspired by the events to remember the exits behind him.


Anko was waiting for them on the roof, and she was smirking. It infuriated Naruto to see her so non-chalant, especially since on their way up the stairs, the killing intent began to increase in intensity until Naruto finally managed to open the door. Then it suddenly cut out, causing the Genin to stumble from the sudden release from pressure.

"Introductions, maggots!" She pointed at Ino. "You start."

"Er... introduction?"

Anko glared at the blonde girl before sighing. "I am Mitarashi Anko, former apprentice to Orochimaru-kusotare. I like dango, snakes, sex, and torturing victims. I hate bigots, Orochimaru-kusotare, spicy food, and people who have no sense of fun. My hobbies include working with ANBU DTI, tea ceremonies, and pranking random idiots. I have two dreams for the future: killing Orochimaru-kusotare, and getting those idiot civilians to leave me the fuck alone." (kusotare means bastard or shithead)

Before the Genin had time to process this information, she pointed at Ino again. "Start speaking."

"Uh, right. My name is Yamanaka Ino, heiress to the Yamanaka Clan. I like flowers and black leather." Anko had almost expected her to say something else - a boy's name, at least - but was mildly disappointed while simultaneously impressed. "I hate Uchiha Sasuke -" Oh! There the name was! "- and I dislike the amount of time I wasted pining after him and the fact that most of the Academy instructors were male, and the female ones were far too uncomfortable talking about sex to teach us girls lessons useful to kunoichi. My hobbies include hanging out with these two idiots -" Kiba and Naruto snorted - there was obviously an inside joke between the three already. "- and running my family's floral shop. My dream is simply to be the best kunoichi." She didn't add that it was to prove to Sasuke that she was better than the shit he saw her for.

Had she said that, though, Anko would have berated her for caring what some idiot boy she didn't like thought.

"Dog breath, you're next."

"Inuzuka Kiba. This is Akamaru."

"Woof."

"I'm not the heir of my clan and I don't wish I was. I like what you might call 'typical Inuzuka things' - dogs and the like; I also like hanging out with Naruto... and Ino. I dislike people who assume that I'm stupid or who praise my sister and ignore me. My hobbies are pulling pranks and training. My dream for the future is to surpass my late father in ability."

Anko raised her eyebrow, but simply pointed at Naruto. "Now, what does the other blonde have to say?"

"Evidently, my name is 'Other Blonde'. I like pain, hate sleep, routinely urinate in people's teacups, and dream of becoming a janitor."

Anko chuckled. "Okay, for real this time."

"I am Uzumaki Naruto; for some reason, I am the village pariah." Taking one look at his shirt, Anko knew that he knew, but his teammates did not yet - which was fine; everyone was allowed to have a skeleton or two in their closet. The two other Genin looked at him a bit oddly, though Kiba merely pushed it to the back of his mind. "I like pranks, ramen, music, my teammates, and training. I hate bigotry. My hobbies are music composition and pranking. I dream of forcing people to acknowledge me for who I am, no matter how stupid it makes them feel, even if I have to become Hokage to do so."

Not much that she didn't already know.

"Okay, brats, I've actually been watching you all day. I approve of your behavior, for the most part. Your goals are all rather good, and though your personalities clash with one anothers' at points, as well as with mine, I do see great potential in the three of you as a team, as well as individuals. All three of you pass my test."

"Test?" asked Ino.

"Yeah. You weren't Genin until you had passed my test. All the Jounin who took teams this year put their Genin through a test. Most use a simple one where the Genin have to get a pair of bells from them - and it takes all three to get the bells, even though they are lied to and told that they will only pass if they get a bell each. Me? I figured I'd skip all the bullshit and put you through a test without any of you knowing prior to the start. You'll find that the test for Jounin is very similar, once you get that far. Anyway, we'll start on training tomorrow. Meet me at Training Ground 44 at nine in the morning. If you're late, your training will be very..." She paused here for dramatic effect. "... silly."

She suddenly disappeared in a cloud of smoke.


End Chapter Two.

Next chapter: "Dammit Uzumaki! Prepare to die!"

Author's Notes

Nope. Kakashi isn't taking a team.

Okay, before anyone accuses anyone of anything: No, Sasuke did not grope or rape Ino when he rejected her. But he did do something that pissed her off. There is a rather blatant clue in this chapter - look for it.

The inside joke between Naruto, Ino, and Kiba is that Ino's hobby, spending time with her team, has only happened once.

Considering that I have this thing rated at M already, I figured I'd just not censor anything this time around. Still no lemony content (as it is against site rules), but limes and swearing will abound. Almost like the game did.

Thank you, Mr. Fix-It-NAO, for being my beta, though he is currently busy with life at the moment. I've decided to post this without his look-over for now.

Omake Tiem!

all by Lord Dragon Claw


Omake 1: Silly Typo, Guinea Pigs are for Science!


Ichiraku Tenchi smiled as he saw his favorite customer walking down the street towards his stand. Naruto was such a nice boy, despite what the idiot neighbors said. This time, not only did he have that Inuzuka boy with him, but a girl too! Must be his new ninja team.

...

"Welcome," Tenchi said to the three new ninja. "Please do not eat any of the food prepared by Washuu-chan as it has a tendency to bite back."

"DAMMIT TENCHI!" screamed a voice from the back. "How am I supposed to experiment if you keep scaring all potential guinea pigs away!?"


Omake 2: Order


"I'll have a pork bowl, please."

"SIMPLE PORK!" Teuchi declared to the back.

"SIMPLE PORK!" echoed Ayame, Teuchi's daughter from the kitchen.

Kiba holstered his kunai. "A chicken bowl with a side of diced beef for Akamaru, please."

"BIG FAT BABY EATING A BRIAN!"

"BIG FAT BABY EATING A BRIAN!"

Ino looked at Teuchi like he was insane.

Naruto thought about it for a minute before ordering. "Two beef, one miso, and one pork for starters, please."

"EVIL MONKEY SOUP!"

"IN THE CLOSET!?"

"YUP!"

"GOT IT! EVIL MONKEY SOUP!"


Omake 3: Breakfast


"Any questions, maggots?" Anko suddenly asked. Kiba and Ino were intimidated, though Kiba wasn't as much. Naruto...

"Does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe?"

Anko blinked for a moment. "You'll get an answer to that question, Mr. Uzumaki, next Saturday."


Omakes 4-7: Introductions Gone Wild


"Now, what does the other blonde have to say?"

"Evidently, my name is 'Other Blonde'. I like pain, hate sleep, routinely urinate in people's teacups, and dream of becoming a janitor."

Anko chuckled. "Okay, for real this time."

"Alright. I am Cornholio! An- AUGH! MY EYE!"

"I HATE that show," growled Anko as she cleaned off her kunai.


"Okay, for real this time."

"I'm Spartacus."


"I am Captain Jack Sparrow."

Anko stared at him for a moment before slitting his throat. "Fucking pirates."


"I am vengeance. I am the night. I. AM. B-"

"If you fucking say 'Batman', I'll turn you into a eunuch."

"I'll be good."


Omakes 8-10: What Else Would She Say?


"... Anyway, we'll start on training tomorrow. Meet me at Training Ground 44 at nine in the morning. If you're late, your training will be very..." She paused here for dramatic effect. "... sexy."

She suddenly disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

"I'm pulling a Kakashi!" declared one of the three Genin.

The two boys looked at each other before deciding to be five minutes later than Ino just declared herself to be.


"... If you're late, your training will be very..." She paused here for dramatic effect. "... smelly."

She suddenly disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

"Well, I ain't fucking riding no damn pig."


"... If you're late, your training will be very..." She paused here for dramatic effect. "... profane."

She suddenly disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

"So," Kiba began. "We're going to learn how to swear at people?"


End Omakes. For now.