I do not own Harry Potter. Nor do I earn any moola. It's all JKs…

For St. Patty's Day – just a little fun with fairytales. Rumpelstiltskin is not particularly an Irish tale, but I was thinking of leprechauns (Rumpels was short after all) and pots of gold when this tale popped into my head so I decided to Snarry-ize it to celebrate!! Obviously AU!! Note – Harry is 16. Some dub-con but not described. Mpreg.

Severus Snapelstiltskin – A (Slightly) Grown-Up Fairytale

Once there was an Auror who was very poor and very boastful. He had a beautiful son of sixteen years named Harry whom he loved very much and whom he tried to keep protected from the world. The boy had large eyes green as emeralds, skin white as snow, hair dark as night and lips red as cherries. His only two flaws were a single scar on his forehead attained during the same accident that had killed his mother when Harry was one year of age and the fact that Harry wore glasses. The round lenses should have marred the boy's beauty, but instead they inexplicably enhanced his vivid green eyes.

Harry spent much of his time in the garden outside his home, under the shade of the nearby tress. He enjoyed carving wooden figures out of branches that fell from those trees. He also tended to the cleaning, cooking and the sewing while his father was working. The little cottage they shared bordered a forest that was said to contain many magical creatures. His father forbid him go into the woods lest he be taken by the fairies. Harry was more beautiful than the fairies were said to be and his father was afraid they would be jealous of the young man. Harry believed that they did indeed watch him from the woods as he sometimes felt eyes upon him when he was alone, so he listened to his father and never ventured forth into it.

One day Harry was playing in the garden when he met Draco, a pale blonde, elfish-like young man while the man was on an errand. Draco worked in the castle for the Dark Lord along with his aristocratic parents. Harry and he became friends and Draco told the boy all about his selfish Lord. The Auror was not happy about his son talking to Draco for Draco's father had money and family connections that the Auror did not have and Draco's father frequently belittled the Auror at social functions.

One day the Auror happened to be talking to the Dark Lord himself after reporting some success with capturing wizards making illegal potions. Draco's father had insinuated that he only captured the criminals because of sheer luck. Although the Auror disliked the Dark Lord, he bristled at his henchman's insult and so when Lucius Malfoy bragged about Draco's ability to transfigure sand into glass, he stupidly boasted to the Dark Lord, "Well, my son can transfigure straw into gold."

Now the Dark Lord was very greedy and he loved gold and power. When he heard the auror's boast, he said, "How fascinating! If your son is as clever as you say, bring him to the castle and we will see what he can do." The auror suddenly realized what a mistake he had made. His pride had now jeopardized his beloved son. The Dark Lord's guards accompanied him back to his home to collect the boy.

In despair, he admitted to his son what he had done. Harry paled as he watched his father cry over his foolish act. Together they attempted to figure out how to solve their dilemma. Nothing could be transfigured into gold. No wizard they had ever heard of had ever done such a thing. They considered trying to escape through the floo but the Dark Lord controlled all methods of travel and they knew they could never get away. They would both be killed if they were caught. And his guards were waiting just outside their home. In defeat, Harry accepted he would have to travel to the castle.

When he was brought before the Dark Lord, Harry was repulsed by his reptilian countenance and the aura of menace that hung about his robes like a miasma. Harry hid his disgust and his fear by kneeling before him as all the citizens of the land were required to do. He breathed a sigh of relief to not have to look upon him for long. He knew the man did not have any goodness within him. Rumors had reached even his ears of the Dark Lord's terrible temper and lack of compassion for his people.

The Dark Lord, also known as Lord Voldemort, took Harry to a room in the dungeons that had no windows and was lit only by some candles. It was full of straw. The Dark Lord handed Harry a wand to use. Wands were very much controlled by the Dark Lord and his administrators since he had begun his rule and so Harry had rarely used one except when his father allowed him to borrow his for practice. He did not have his own wand as they were quite expensive and only given on the approval of the Dark Lord.

Lord Voldemort then left the boy after saying, "Off you go then. All this straw must be made into gold by tomorrow morning. If you don't manage this, I will have you killed." The stone door slammed heavily behind him.

Harry sat down in one corner and wanted to cry. He didn't know what to do. How on earth could he transfigure straw into gold when no one else had ever accomplished it? Tears began to well up making his bright green eyes even brighter. All of a sudden a funny looking man appeared before him. He had long, greasy black hair, a hooked nose and crooked, yellow teeth. He said with a low, deep voice, "Good evening. Why are you crying?"

"Oh," Harry said forlornly, "I must transfigure this straw in to gold by tomorrow morning and I don't know how."

"What will you give me," asked the man, "if I do it for you?" He arched a heavy eyebrow as he approached the young man. He stood in front of Harry with his arms crossed.

"My collar," replied the Auror's son after a long pause. He fingered the silver collar which rested on his finely sculpted collar bones. It had the head of a gryffin on one end and the tail of a serpent on the other. Harry's long neck was exposed as he wore a threadbare, sleeveless tunic he had sewn himself from a leftover grain sack. His distressed leather pants weren't in much better shape. "The eyes are made of two small emeralds and a small ruby sits in its mouth," Harry explained. "My mother left it to me," he finished with a whispered hint of sadness. The other man began carefully stroking over the silver bands. His long yellow-stained fingers occasionally slipped and brushed over Harry's skin instead. He seemed to take a long time to examine the collar. Harry felt the man's warm breath on his neck as he loomed over Harry. It sent funny shivers down his spine.

The funny looking man finally nodded as if satisfied and removed the collar from Harry. He walked across the room, his black robes swirling about him as sat himself down on the chair across from the boy. Whoosh, Whoosh, Whoosh, three times the wand waved to the left and the first bale of straw had been turned into a stack of gold bars. Whoosh, Whoosh, Whoosh, three times the wand waved to the right the second bale of straw has also been turned to gold.

Harry felt naked without the weight of the collar he had grown used to over the years. Or maybe it was the way the other man would stop and watch him for minutes on end without saying a word. From a distance, Harry thought the man looked mysterious and intriguing.

The man worked well into the night, seemingly content in his work, until it was done and all the straw was turned into gold. When he was finished he stood up and nodded at Harry. Harry pretended not to cry as he watched the dark-haired man leave with the only thing left to him from his mother.

When the Dark Lord unlocked the door and came into the room the next morning, he was amazed and astonished. His red eyes flashed with excitement. He was delighted with the bars of gold. But the Dark Lord was a greedy man and his heart swelled with greed. This was not enough for him. Now he wanted more. So he took the Auror's son into a larger room that was also full of straw, and again told him to spin all the straw into gold or he would have him killed.

Again, the Lord locked the door and Harry started to weep. But all of a sudden the man from the previous evening came in again and said, "What will you give me this time to do your task?" He had an intense look on his face that frightened Harry but he did not know what else he could do.

"This ring on my finger," he replied. The ring was a family heirloom given to him by his father on his thirteenth birthday. It was the only thing of value his father had left. The man reached out to take Harry's hand and lightly stroked it as he examined the ring while it was still on his finger. Harry felt a slight shiver at the gentle touch. After a few moments, the dour man slipped the ring off of Harry's hand and started work. Whoosh, Whoosh, Whoosh, three times the wand waved to the left and the first bale of straw had been turned into a stack of gold bars. Whoosh, Whoosh, Whoosh, three times the wand waved to the right the second bale of straw has also been turned to gold. He worked well into the night, seemingly content in his work, until the work was done and all the straw was turned into gold.

Harry felt naked without the weight of the ring on his finger that he had grown used to over the years. Or maybe again it was the way the other man would stop and watch him for minutes on end without saying a word. From a distance, Harry thought the man looked enigmatic and fascinating.

In the morning the Lord came in again and was even more astonished to see that all the straw had been spun into gold once again. However his greed meant that he was still not satisfied, and he took the Auror's son to an even bigger room, also full of straw and said, "All this must be spun into gold by the morning. If you do not succeed, I shall have you killed."

Harry's shoulders drooped momentarily but decided he would not fail. He squared his shoulders back and looked at Lord Voldemort in the face for the very first time. "Yes, my Lord," he answered and tried to smile.

The Dark Lord looked the young man carefully. He had never noticed his green eyes before nor his shy, sweet smile. He thought to himself, 'He could be my consort. He may only be an Auror's son, but I couldn't find a richer or more powerful consort in the whole world. And he is an attractive young man. I would enjoy him greatly,' the evil man thought, 'After all, Lords do not live on gold alone.'

As soon as Harry was left alone, he began cry in desperation, the unusual looking man appeared yet again and said, "What will you give me this time for doing your task?"

"I have nothing left to give you," sobbed the Auror's son. He despaired. He would never see his father again for he would be dead in the morning.

The man knelt at Harry's chair and grabbed his hands tightly. "Then promise me," the man said with intense eyes upon Harry, "to give me your first child once you are wed to the Dark Lord."

The Auror's son thought to himself, 'That will never happen. The Dark Lord will never bond with a poor auror's son!' So Harry promised the man to give him what he wanted. When the man smiled at him for the first time, Harry felt an electric spark sizzle through his body. Harry no longer noticed his greasy hair or his hooked nose or his crooked, yellow teeth. All he noticed was his calming, commanding presence and his dark, powerful gaze.

The man sat down to work. Whoosh, Whoosh, Whoosh, three times the wand waved to the left and the first bale of straw had been turned into a stack of gold bars. Whoosh, Whoosh, Whoosh, three times the wand waved to the right the second bale of straw has also been turned to gold. He worked well into the night, seemingly happy in his work, until the work was done and all the straw was turned into gold.

Harry felt naked every time the other man would stop and watch him for minutes on end without saying a word. From across the room, Harry thought the man looked inscrutable and captivating.

The Dark Lord came into the room in the morning and found all that he had wished for, so he married the Auror's son the very next day, and Harry really did become the Lord's Consort, much to his dismay. Harry had had no desire for the Lord as he had a monsterous visage and equally horrible personality. His breath stunk as well. But he had been given no choice. Bond with Lord Voldemort or be killed. His father was threatened as well. Although he knew it was his father's fault for getting him into this predicament, he was also the only family he had left and he loved his father. So Harry consented to be bonded to the Dark Lord.

The wedding night was terrible for Harry as were the subsequent nights when he had to share his bed with his odious husband. There was only one night Harry could admit to enjoying marital relations with his husband. The night the Dark Lord decided it was time Harry bore him a son. He brought a potions peddler in to provide the necessary potions to enable a young wizard to bear children. The first night he took it, he remembered his husband being loving and attentive. He felt desired for more than his power or his ability to make gold (which thankfully his husband didn't ask for again). He had even been kissed sweetly and told he was lovely. The kind words were never repeated nor was the sweet kissing upon his mouth ever replicated.

A year later, he had a child with dark hair like his own, and while he still hated his husband, he loved his child. He had forgotten all about his promise to the oddly attractive man until one day he suddenly appeared in his room and reminded him of it. Harry was horrified. He offered the dark-haired man all the riches in the kingdom if only he could forget his promise to him. He cried and cried and cried. In fact he cried so much that the man took pity on him.

The man approached Harry and knelt down in front of him. He gently stroked down the side of Harry's face then cupped his jaw. "I will give you three days grace," he offered quietly. "If, in that time, you can find out what my name is, you can keep your baby and stay in your present situation if you wish." With that offer, the man left Harry to his own thoughts. Harry was so distraught over the possibility of losing his child he never noticed that the hair was no longer greasy nor were his teeth yellow.

Draco, who was now Harry's chamberlain, heard of his pain and went to speak to him. He saw how distressed Harry was so he went out into the world to try and seek out the man and find out his name.

That night Harry tossed and turned all night trying to think of all the odd names that he had ever heard. He sent out messengers around the kingdom, and across the land to ask what other names there may be. The next day, the man came and Harry began to reel off some names. "Remus, Neville, Seamus, Terry, Collin" and all the other names he knew, but to all of them the dark man said, "That's not my name!"

On the second day Harry sent the messengers back out to find out more names, and when the man came back Harry tried all the funny, comical names he knew. "Scar-head, Snivellus, Snuffles, Hedwig, Hagrid", but stern man just answered, "No," to all of them.

On the third day, after having many adventures and meeting many different creatures, Draco returned. He told Harry, "As I walked through a thick forest yesterday, I saw a little hut, and before the hut there burnt a fire, and by the fire sat a hooked-nosed, dark-haired man with crooked teeth. As he sat there staring at the fire, he recited:

Today I brew, tomorrow I bake,

And after that the child I'll take.

I'm the winner of the game,

For Severus Snape is my name".

When Harry heard this, he jumped for joy as he knew that this was surely the man's name. As soon as his visitor arrived that night, he joked, "Is it Tom?"

"No," the man laughed at the irony, knowing full well that that was the Dark Lord's real first name and that Harry still did not know it.

"Is it Sirius?"

"No, you must be joking," he answered, amused.

"Is it Dumbledore?"

"No." The dark man laughed heartily.

"Could it be………… Severus Snape?" the young man said with a hint of a wink. Now that he knew he would not have to give up this child, Harry recognized the dark attractiveness that the man had exuded those first few nights he knew him. If only he wasn't bonded to the Dark Lord.

"Some idiotic brat must have told you that!" cried the dour man seemingly quite distressed. He swirled his robe angrily about him and strode towards the young man in a rush. He grabbed Harry by his own robes and pushed him against a wall. Harry felt a sudden rush of heat and fear. 'What will this man do now that he's lost?' he thought with trepidation.

Of all the things Harry thought would happen, having Severus Snape kiss him wasn't one of them. And, wow, the man could kiss. He forced Harry's mouth open with his tongue and swiped the inside of his mouth as if Harry were the best thing he ever tasted. Harry couldn't help but respond in kind. He willingly opened up to the man. He felt a surge of heat rush through his veins and pool below. One leg began to automatically lift and wrap itself around Severus' hip. As his mouth was being devoured, he felt a strong hand begin to massage at his groin and grip him possessively. Harry arched and thrust into the other man. He felt so good, so very, very good to thrust against. He had only ever been aroused like this once before.

Severus Snape began moving his mouth down along Harry's lean neck. He tongued and licked and sucked down one side and up the other. Harry shuddered. It was a particularly sensitive part of Harry's anatomy. His husband never bothered except for that one time – the night of little Evan's conception.

"You are so, so, lovely," Snape panted between licks.

Suddenly, Harry pulled away and stared at him… "You!" he half whispered, half gasped.

And Severus Snape pulled him back into his arms reassuringly, "Yes..me." There was a small pause as he smiled at Harry. "It was me that night," he admitted with a nod. He stared into Harry's wide eyes as he explained his actions. "I polyjuiced into the Dark Lord after I slipped a sleeping potion into his drink. I came to you and gave you the potion to make you able to bear children. I'd waited such a long time for you," Severus said between placing kisses over Harry's forehead and cheeks.

Harry eyes widened, "But, but why?" Tears were beginning to well up. Harry had been through so many emotions the past few days, he didn't know how to handle them.

"You did promise me your first-born," and the man smirked at him, but in a slightly warm way, "but I meant the making of it." He kissed Harry's hair almost not feeling the tenseness that had seeped through his body.

Harry was horrified that it had all been a joke, a prank, a way to get in his pants. Severus finally felt him tense up and leaned back to look into his eyes and said earnestly, "I wanted it to be mine Harry. I've loved you for some time. My hut is not so far from your cottage. I watched you from the woods. Watched you in your garden. You are so lovely. So beautiful. So sweet." Severus pulled him into a tight hug and whispered in his ear, "And when those guards came and took you away, I followed. I was so afraid I'd lose you forever. I had to find some way to save you."

Harry was stunned. Never had he thought someone would risk such a thing and yet…

"Why did you make me pay for your services then? Why did you not just tell me?" Harry asked trying to understand the man before him.

"I knew you would never want an ugly man like me. And if I couldn't have all of you, I could have a part of you – your child. It was terribly selfish of me. I'm not a good man, Harry," he admitted. His dark eyes seemed to glisten with shame.

"But you're not evil. Unlike my…" Harry suddenly stopped and became very pale. "Oh my..." he finally whispered, "what will I do about.."

"Do you want to be free of him?" Severus interrupted Harry's thoughts.

Harry thought long and hard about this question. His husband had killed and tortured many people, he had abused his power, his servants, and his authority. He was the worst of despots. "Yes," Harry admitted.

"And so you shall be," Severus swore with a kiss to Harry's cheek.

Harry looked at him nervously, "Um, do I want to know? No – I can't condone any violence. I can't..."

Severus smiled and kissed him gently on the lips. "Of course you can't. You are too sweet. But don't worry, he shall not be harmed. I have a special potion that can make the imbiber suddenly feel a deep remorse for any wrongdoing he has done. If someone as sweet and innocent as you took it, you might weep for a few minutes on some minor infractions you may have committed, but someone like him, well I expect they'll feel a great deal more remorse for their actions."

One week later, Harry was unsurprised when The Dark Lord suddenly announced his desire to become a monk and move out of the country and turn the ruling of his lands over to his former bondmate. He magically transferred all his power of authority to Harry after granting him a divorce and then he left for the distant lands of Turkey never to be heard from again.

So Harry kept his baby, and loved him all the more because he belonged to Severus Snape and not to the Dark Lord after all. And, after a proper courtship, Harry and Severus bonded and lived happily for a very long time.

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