A/N: I kinda just got into the whole Puck/Kurt love. I totally could get into it. :D not a lot else to say here lol. I might do a series of fics with these two but this one is pretty light on the loving it didn't feel right to have them dive right in so to speak lol First Glee fic :)
The back seat had remained empty for the exception of one for the most of the journey. It was silent back there and nobody had dared to venture out of their seats, not really sure it was in any way a good idea. Quiet chatter had filled the bus but the once popular jock remained silent in the back seat, an air of anger and loneliness surrounding him that the rest of the group were wary of approaching him for fear of either upsetting him or Finn. Kurt however had been unable to avoid glancing at him every now and then, his attention gradually more on Puck sat alone at the back of the bus than on whatever conversation Mercedes was attempting to have with him. Ten minutes and some more of staring and Kurt had decided to go to him, leaving Mercedes without a word, and found himself stood in front of the unusually lonely looking jock.
"What do you want Hummel?" Puck asked lowly, his eyes not meeting Kurt's. He knew Kurt wasn't dumb, and he knew if he looked at him Kurt would figure him in seconds. He'd see past the anger and the aggression and figure he was just as fucked up and lost as anyone else. So he just stared at his guitar, occasionally strumming the strings, and hoped the other boy would leave him alone. "Get lost man. I don't need some fag's help. Not now or ever."
"I see through your facade Noah. You're as bad at hiding the real you as Rachel is at getting dressed in the morning," he replied dryly. Still Puck avoided looking at him, and Kurt couldn't quite decide whether to remain at the back of the bus or return to his seat. It was an impossible task trying to fix Noah Puckerman, but still he felt the urge to because he was so desperately drawn to the guys he could never have; it was messed up, he knew that much for certain. "I may never attempt this again; the slushies I will receive will never be worth it. But I think you need to know that that you're not all alone. And it's terribly depressing watching you sat here, drowning in your own self pity because of a few mistakes."
He hadn't expected it. It was Kurt, Kurt who was to his knowledge desperately in love with Finn, and yet stood offering him solace. Something about it didn't seem right but at that moment he didn't have a whole lot else, and even he wasn't dumb enough to turn away a friend when he had so few left. "What is it about him? What the hell does everybody see in Finn? My whole life I've just been the loser who the chicks go for when they realise they can't have him."
"You're kind of a jerk. And while he is undoubtedly dumb he is naively sweet," his answer was honest. Because to say anything other than would be a lie and Puck figured lies were worth nothing, were the very things that had led him to fucking up on such a grand scale. And knowing that made him almost appreciate Kurt's honesty, almost. "I'm sorry that this all went so badly. And I imagine you want to hold this against Rachel, which a part of me really wouldn't dislike, but she only did what she thought was right."
"Why the hell are you talking to me anyway? Aren't you desperately in love with Finn? God knows everyone else is in this godforsaken town," He spat out angrily, a look of near despondency in his eyes as he looked at the other boy now sat next to him. He didn't hate Finn, he just hated how shit he felt because of Finn. "I fucking hate him sometimes. I hate him because he's everything, and I'm nothing. And I don't get it, I don't get why you, Rachel and everyone else loves him so goddamn much...I don't get why I had to be the fuck up."
"Oh I would never say you're a fuck up. A terribly bad dresser on occasion, but never a fuck up Noah," Kurt stated as he rest his hand on Puck's shoulder. "Sometimes we just need somebody. Then the fucking up doesn't seem so bad."
"You know I'd almost think you gave a shit the way you're talking," Puck retorted, his voice softening as he stared at Kurt. "I just thought...hell it doesn't even matter anymore."
"What did you think?" He asked gently, resting his hand on Puck's without even regarding the consequences or reaction he'd get off the often homophobic football player. It took him seconds to realise what he had done before he pulled his hand away, knowing that Noah Puckerman was even more unavailable than Finn. And it killed him inside, tore up when he realised that he and Puck shared the same problem of longing for something they could never have. "I'm sorry about that."
He didn't say anything. Didn't want to say anything because there was something about Kurt, something Puck was drawn to and made him feel entirely confused. He wasn't gay. He really wasn't. But he wanted Kurt almost as much as he'd wanted Quinn, and that was almost just as fucked up as his betrayal of supposed best friend. "I just figured she'd want me. I figured I'd be the first choice. But I was fucking wrong about that as well; once a Lima loser always a Lima loser I guess."
"You would always be my first choice. Always," Kurt uttered lowly, his words barely above a whisper. Standing up he knew he had to return to his seat before he said anything more, before he'd given Puck all the ammo he needed to make his life a living hell. "I should go."
"Don't," said Puck almost pleadingly as he wrapped his hand around Kurt's wrist to stop him from leaving. "Why'd you say that? What the fuck Kurt!"
He shifted nervously, hoping in vain that Puck would forget it. And he hated himself almost, hated having to try to be the jock's knight in shining armour without considering the consequences. It didn't stop him however, and Kurt realised in that moment he was his own worst enemy. Because Puck wouldn't let it go and slushies would undoubtedly be the least of his problems.
"I like you," he answered nervously. "I seem to want only the unattainable. But then so do you Puck."
The silence descended on them in moments and it took what felt like an eternity for Puck to realise he still had a hold of Kurt's wrist. Releasing his hold on him he trailed his hand down Kurt's arm, his fingers brushing lightly over the back of his hand before he knotted his fingers with his. "Stay here man. Let's talk about Wicked or some shit."
"You hate Wicked." Kurt said with a smile as he sat back down, his hand still not his own as Puck held onto it as if afraid if he let go he'd be alone. It would end only in tears, most likely for himself, but if he could be the knight in shining armour just for one day then that was enough; it really was.
"I'm not gay. Just figured you should know that," Puck declared, noting the look of disappointment in Kurt's eyes as he did. "But you're not so bad for a homo."
"Thank you...I think," said Kurt, a smile creeping on his face as he looked at Puck. "I'm not straight. Just thought that you should know that."