AN: I've been watching too much YouTube xD I've been watching a bunch of Kagome/Hiei videos. But this story was inspired by KelseyWeeks00's video Hiei and Kagome [Fallen]. I'm telling you the name so you can look it up and watch it! No links because this site says "no links for you!" Anyway, this is a one-shot. I hope you enjoy!
Disclaimer: I don't own, please don't sue!
Kagome sat in her living room reading when a light tapping sound caught her attention. At first she dismissed it as the wind causing a window to rattle somewhere in the house and was content to return to her book. But the sound gradually grew to an uneven rapping that she could distinctly tell was coming from her front door. Glancing at the clock above her small fireplace she saw that it was nearing midnight.
"Who in the world would come here this late?" The twenty-six year old woman asked nobody in particular as she placed her book on the coffee table, hefted herself off of the couch, and made her way through the kitchen.
The knocking continued as she flipped on the light in the front hall before unlocking the door. Her hand had barely touched the door handle when the knocking stopped and a long scraping sound replaced it. The cause of the sound began almost directly in front of her face and didn't stop until it reached the bottom of the door. Kagome's heart almost stopped in her chest as an incredible sense of foreboding caused her to give a heavy shudder. All sounds had stopped.
The night air was now silent and felt thick. An almost electric charge danced across her skin as she closed her eyes to get a grip on her now frayed nerves. "I'm getting too old for this kind of stuff," she whispered while cautiously opening the door.
Darkness greeted her.
One glance at the outside of her door revealed five rough claw marks gouged into the wood. She instantly began to scan the shadows of the shrine grounds without stepping past her home's threshold. Unless there was a very large predatory cat roaming Tokyo, there was only one thing that could have done that to her door. Steeling her nerves and using the most commanding voice she could muster, the wary woman called into the dark courtyard, "You've chosen the wrong shrine. I am trained and confident in my abilities. I do not need a weapon to defeat you. If you are looking for trouble, I will end your search here."
Kagome briefly wondered if she sounded anywhere near as convincing aloud as she did in her head. She'd come far in her training but she wasn't positive that she could take on any adversary that decided to rush her from the shadows with her bare hands.
Quiet continued to reign as she waited for some kind of response or movement. But when something suddenly gripped her ankle tightly, she easily broke the stillness with a terrified shriek. She instantly looked to her feet to see what was holding her only to see a bloodied hand extending from a crumpled black form. Jerking her foot back and wincing at the few light wounds she received from the creature's claws, Kagome swallowed the lump in her throat and asked, "Who are you and what is your business here?"
A low groan was heard as the blood-covered hand extended blindly as though searching for her before a deep, rough voice choked out "Ka…go…me…"
Blue eyes widened before she quickly dropped to her knees and rolled over a firm body and, for the first time in several months, laid eyes on the demon known simply as Hiei. "Oh my God…" she whispered shakily before panic set in. "Hiei! Talk to me! What happened to you?" When she got no response, Kagome grabbed the man's shoulders and tugged him into the house before shutting the door. With several more huffs and labored tugs, she was able to pull his strong body onto her tiled kitchen floor.
It was at times like this that she was both grateful and regretful that she now lived alone. It would be much easier to move Hiei with some help, but she didn't want to subject her family to anymore danger. She tried waking him one more time without success before she rushed to the hallway bathroom to grab her box of first aid supplies.
When she returned her stomach turned slightly at the sight of dark blood spreading across the floor through the grout of the tile. But she quickly brought herself back to the situation at hand and sat beside the injured demon. She'd been through similar scenarios in the past countless times, but another person's blood never failed to shake her a little. She quickly set about cutting away the tattered shirt he wore and held back a sob at the deep gashes running across his chest, stomach, and arms. At least they were clean cuts; 'Made from a sharp blade, most likely a sword,' she thought with an analytical eye.
The only problem was that they hadn't stopped bleeding. "I'm so sorry, Hiei…but I can't let you die." With that she was instantly on her feet again and rummaging through her kitchen drawers. It was in the third draw that she found the knife she was looking for and mentally noted to reorganize her kitchen when everything was over. Flipping on the flame to one of her gas oven's eyes, she heated the knife until it had a slight glow before rushing back to Hiei and trying to cauterize a few key places on his wounds. The rest of the cuts and gashes were closed with stitches and wiped clean. She wasn't overly concerned with infection because she knew that his body would likely fight anything that was left, but she did spray on some disinfectant for good measure before wrapping his chest and arms.
She pulled up his loose, dirty pants legs and saw that the only had a few minor cuts and scrapes that would be easily treated with some ointment and band-aids. When he was no longer bleeding and all of his wounds were examined, Kagome went to a guest bedroom and grabbed a t-shirt and sweatpants that Souta had left on his last visit. The pants would be a little big on Hiei, but with the drawstring she knew that they would do for now.
The clean clothes were set on the kitchen table while she pulled Hiei down the hall and into the bathroom where she propped him up against the side of the bathtub. "Please wake up, Hiei." She coaxed as she gently stroked his face. A small spark of hope grew when he moaned in his sleep but was quickly extinguished when he quieted again. With a sad sigh, she grabbed a few rags and began to wipe the blood, dirt, and grime from his skin. His body was still so familiar to her hands. How many times had she treated his wounds before?
"Hiei," she softly began her reprimand. "Will you ever stop picking senseless fights?"
The demon she was bandaging avoided her eye contact and instead scowled at the wall for a moment before answering, "A human woman like you wouldn't understand."
"I'm pretty smart, Hiei. Why don't you try explaining it to me this time? Because frankly I'm getting really tired of washing your blood off of my hands every to every other week." Her tone was a little harder, a little colder this time.
Hiei turned to face her this time and flatly said, "It's who I am."
She silently urged him to turn back around so that she could finish what she was doing. No more words passed between them until she stood to wash her hands and leave the room. Pausing in the doorway but not looking back at him, she said, "You are who you want to be, Hiei. Fate may dictate the situations you're put into, but your reaction to them is ultimately your decision."
Kagome gently lifted Hiei's head from its resting place on the edge of the tub after rinsing the last of the blood and sweat from the dark locks. She towel dried his gravity-defying hair as much as she could before gently brushing it and then dressing him in her brother's clothes.
She rested against the tub as well before attempting to move him again. She looked over at his unconscious form and remembered the first time she ever saw him asleep. She had been shocked to say the least. It was almost three years after they met that she saw him asleep for the first time. He was nestled at the base of the God Tree where he usually waited for her to get home from school. But with the warm weather and gentle breeze, it was easy to see how he had dozed off.
Her cousin, Yusuke, had shown up at her house one day saying that they needed to have a little "chat." He explained what he did and that there had been a high influx of demons into the human realm. His boss was apparently worried about what would happen if one of them reached her and the jewel that she still carried within her body. Their orders had been that one of them was to guard Kagome at all times while the rest dealt with the high demon population. And Hiei had been chosen as her protector.
She knew that he had resented her, but they had eventually formed a shaky understanding of one another. And that was how it happened.
They fell in love.
Kagome hadn't missed the glances Hiei would give her when he thought that she wasn't looking. He was gentler than he used to be. She didn't lose her temper as quickly with him as she used to. He didn't glare at her anymore. She actually took comfort in his presence.
There were little signs that things had changed between them at some point, but they wouldn't understand the new feelings until the day that Souta had moved to live in the dorms of a private high school he'd gotten a scholarship to attend while her mother and grandfather left her to run the shrine on her own and make it easier for her to raise her own family one day.
It was her first night in the house on her own and things were so quiet. She was curled up on the couch just looking around and listening to the empty house. She felt so alone. Just as her head was resting on her knees the front door opened and Hiei entered the house to give his perimeter check report.
"There are no threats. The shrine grounds have been closed for the evening and all visitors are gone. I'll be in the God Tree again if you feel threatened…" Hiei trailed off as he looked at the young woman in front of him. "Why are you crying?" He deadpanned.
"I'm sorry, Hiei," she answered as she wiped at her cheeks with the back of her hand. "It's nothing. I'm just feeling lonely since it's my first night in the house now that I'm living by myself."
"Foolish woman. I've been living on these grounds for some time now and you still count yourself as alone?"
She stared at him for a moment before smiling softly. "You're right…I'm sorry. You're just not in the house that much." She paused. "Will you come sit with me?" At the wary look he gave her, she amended herself. "Just for a few minutes?"
Hiei hesitated for a moment before walking around the couch and taking a seat on the opposite end.
Kagome wasn't sure exactly why she'd done it, but she soon found herself at the same end of the couch as a very tense Hiei as she snuggled up to his side. He was so warm and solid. In that moment he was exactly what her little world needed to stabilize again. And maybe it was that thought…or maybe it was the soft firelight that made him look so handsome…but something in her guided her hand into turning his face towards hers so that she could kiss the lips that told her that she wasn't alone.
It was soft and warm and shy, but when Hiei pulled her closer instead of pushing her away, it was magical.
That had been the beginning of a new chapter in Kagome's life. Hiei started sleeping inside the house (something that Yusuke wasn't particularly fond of) and Kagome started wondering what it would be like to spend the rest of their lives like that; happy together…maybe with a family one day.
Kagome laughed almost bitterly to herself as she dragged the demon's body to her living room couch. 'Please,' she scoffed. 'That dream was nice while it lasted. It was before everything went to hell…'
Not that she had anyone to blame but herself. Even Hiei's team—his friends—tried to warn her about his nature. But had she listened? Of course not. She loved him and he loved her. Surely that would have been enough to overcome any problems they faced…right?
"Hiei!" Kagome yelled as she ran out of the house after her lover. "Where are you going?"
Barely glancing over his shoulder, he answered, "To the demon realm. I'm going to get some training in. I shouldn't be gone more than a week."
Angered by the dismissive tone in his voice, Kagome reached out to grab his shoulder and forcefully turn him around. "Stop. You can't keep running off like this. If…if you want to train then let me call Yusuke or Kurama and you can spar with one of them. Going out and fighting miniature wars against demons isn't going to make you stronger, it's going to get you killed!" The thought of Hiei's unmoving body brought tears to her eyes. "Don't you want to stay here with me? What's so bad about living a peaceful life?"
Hiei released an exasperated sigh. It wasn't the first time that this topic had been brought up. "Of course I want to be with you. I've stayed at this shrine far longer than my job required, haven't I? But a peaceful life will make one weak. I won't allow my skills or senses to be dulled because of your irrational fears. I will be back in a week." And with that he turned to leave once more.
Kagome felt a piece of her heart crack with his words. And within that single crack, she found her conviction. "No…you won't." She watched with trembling knees and shaking breath as the black-clad demon stopped and turned to face her with a questioning look. With a deep shuddering breath, she hardened her gaze and her voice before speaking again. "If you leave these grounds now to go to start another senseless fight and take more lives without just cause…don't…don't bother coming back." The last of her words came out in a cracked voice.
She saw a fire of disbelief and rebellion light in his eyes momentarily as his stance became tense. It was obvious that he was replaying her words, her ultimatum, in his head, and she had no idea what his reaction would be. But she hadn't truly expected what he did next. Looking her dead in the eye and glaring slightly he said, "Have it your way." And then he left.
When he disappeared from her sight, Kagome felt like she had been punched in the stomach. He had really left her. Was she really that easy to walk away from?
Sinking to her knees, she did the only thing that she was able to do at the moment; she cried.
After getting Hiei onto the couch, Kagome sat in the floor at his side and watched him sleep for a moment. Without her noticing, she eventually drifted into a light slumber feeling more secure and safe than she had in months. His presence always did have that effect on her.
But while Kagome slept, Hiei was having dreams of his own. They weren't anything specific, just little clips of memories. His dreams were filled with images of Kagome's smiles, her kind and caring eyes, her gentle hands that always touched him as though he would break. He could hear her laughter as she found amusement in some small, insignificant thing. He could smell her scent which had always reminded him of a spring day when all the world was in bloom. It was the same scent that surrounded him now, and the scent that he gradually woke up to.
When he noticed where he was and that not only had his wounds been treated but he'd been cleaned and changed, Hiei felt like a world-class jackass. What had he been thinking? How could he even think to show his face to her again? He had completely left her and any dreams that she may have had for their future.
But while he lay there beating himself up about coming back, deep down he knew why he'd done it. He had finally been overwhelmed and barely escaped from his fight with his life. He knew that he was losing strength quickly and if he was truly going to die, he wanted to see her one last time. It was selfish, he knew, but he couldn't help it.
"Kagome," he rasped as he moved a shaky hand to run through her hair. She'd fallen asleep watching over him. How could she still care after everything that he'd put her through?
His fingers lightly traced the features of her face; the smooth skin of her cheeks, her long and delicate eyelashes, her soft lips. He had missed those lips. The backs of his fingers ran across her jaw and down her neck to her shoulder. He skimmed down her arm and allowed his hand to fall to the floor from there, but not before bumping something else on the way down. With a confused frown marring his features, he lifted his hand once more to inspect what he had bumped since he couldn't sit up quite yet.
The object was slightly rounded and warm. It was covered in a soft material. He was at a loss for only a moment before a light fluttering of energy made itself known from within. It wasn't much, but that little flicker of life told him all that he needed to know and he felt his chest tighten painfully for it. His first thoughts were of what a fool he had been, but were swiftly followed by the panic-induced thoughts of how there was no way he could have known. But no matter how he tried to reason it out, he knew that there was no excuse. "What have I done?" He whispered into the dimly lit room.
"You know exactly what you did," a sleepy voice answered as sapphire eyes fluttered open to look in his direction.
Hiei was at a loss for words. "Kagome…I—"
"Don't," she said as she sat up and stretched. "How are you feeling?" Her voice was calm and distant as though she was dealing with a stranger.
"Alive," he answered.
"Good. As soon as you're able to stand, you can go. I wouldn't want to hold you back from your "training,"" she almost spat out the last word. "Feel free to eat before you go. You know the basics: don't strain your wounds too much or they'll reopen, get enough rest, etcetera. I'm going to go lay down in my room now. Since I don't expect to see you here when I get up in the morning, it was nice seeing you again." He couldn't help but notice how haunted her eyes looked as she stared at him when she talked.
"I'll still be here," he answered before making to close his eyes again thinking that the discussion was over for now.
There was a small pause before he heard, "Don't be."
"What?" He asked somewhat incredulously. Wasn't that what she wanted? For him to stay?
"I said don't be here when I get up. As much as I hate to say it, I gave you your chances and you ultimately made the choice to walk out on me and, though we didn't know it at the time, our baby. If you couldn't stay because you didn't care about me enough, I don't want you to be here for this baby. I won't give you the chance to walk out on the both of us later on!"
Hiei's eyes narrowed at the woman standing at the food of the couch. "So it would be better for them to grow up with no father at all?"
"Quite the contrary. This child will never lack love. After you left and I found out that I was pregnant, your old team stepped up immediately. They all seem quite excited about helping out actually," he voice held a bit of amusement at some of the memories from the past few months.
Hiei gave her a blank stare before dead-panning, "Excuse me?" His former team was taking care of his unborn child and the mother?
Kagome nodded. "Yes, they've all been very helpful. Yusuke has been helping me baby-proof the house while Kuwabara and Kurama alternate between accompanying me to doctor appointments and Lamaze classes. Kurama has been especially helpful. I think your disappearance was a hard blow to him as well."
The fox was not going to play the father figure in his son or daughter's life. "Kagome, we need to talk about—"
"No!" She cut him off. "The time for "talking about things" is gone, Hiei. You left me. Do you have any idea how much it hurt knowing that you would rather be out killing and fighting than building a life here with me? After you left and I found out that I was going to have a baby, I almost lost it. I had no idea how to cope with that! If it wasn't for your team, I don't know what I would have done. But now that I'm finally starting to pull things back together again, you will not just come waltzing back into my life like nothing ever happened!" She was becoming hysterical now and she knew it, but with all of her pent-up emotions combined with her pregnancy hormones it was a little hard to stop. But after a few calming breaths, she began again, "I know how fast you heal. A few hours rest and you should at least be okay to walk. If you're still here in the morning I will call Yusuke, Kurama, and Kuwabara. Goodnight, Hiei…and goodbye." Holding back tears, she made her way down the hall and quietly shut her bedroom door.
And for the first time in a very long time, Hiei shed a tear for what he knew that he had lost.
It was several hours later when the sun began to rise. Hiei was no longer on the couch, but his tear gem was left in the center of Kagome's kitchen table.
From the bottom of the shrine stairs, the hurting fire-hybrid silently vowed that he would find a way to change…find a way to show her that he had changed…and then he would be back to claim what was his and never let it slip away again. But for now he limped down the deserted sidewalk toward a certain fox-avatar's home. His old friend was probably going to give him a thrashing and a lecture, but he was going to need the red-head's help.
'One day, Kagome…one day we'll have what you always dreamed of. I promise.'
AN: Wow! I started this forever ago and just randomly decided to finish it. Sorry for my absence! My computer got infected with a nasty little virus and once it was fixed I just couldn't get back into the swing of writing. I think this helped though and I should have a few more things going up soon! Thanks for reading, feedback is appreciated! Hope you enjoyed!
STRUCTURE EDITED: 6/29/12. Something had gone wrong when this was originally posted and the spacing and format got all messed up.