Lately I've been enjoying the show Castle and wanted to try my hand at a fanfic on that one, but decided to write it as a crossover with Bones. There are only five chapters to this one, and I will post the other four depending on how well this one goes over with the readers. This first chapter is a scene between Booth and Bones discussing Beckett and Castle, who had come to DC to consult on a serial killer that had been found adding to his body count in the DC area. I hope you all enjoy this one. Gregg.
Disclaimer: I don't own, or profit from, these characters or franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
"We should have had them help us on this," Booth said with a mock glare at his partner, best friend, and now girlfriend.
"We don't need their help," Bones said from her desk without looking up. She continued typing rapidly on her laptop. She smirked at his attitude. She was the one who did most of the paperwork on their cases unless gunfire was involved during the course of the investigation, so she didn't see what he had to complain about. Long ago she'd accepted that, and rather enjoyed just having him there for company while she did their paperwork.
"Bones," Booth sighed from behind several boxes of Thai takeout. "It's now 2 in the morning. We are nowhere near done with the paperwork, and you're saying we don't need any help?"
"We would have been done some time ago if someone hadn't been more interested in making out on the couch," she pointed out logically. "Besides which, I assume that they have a great deal of their own paperwork to do for the New York Police Department."
"It was a motivational exercise," he clarified, a smile on his face. "And they could have at least offered to help," he grumbled good naturedly.
Bones stopped typing. "Motivational?" she asked, clearly amused.
"Of course," he told her, making a show of picking up a file and determinedly flipping to a photograph.
"So that's what they call simultaneous oral sex now," she grinned.
"69, Bones," he told her with a chuckle. "And remember the rule. No squint talk when discussing foreplay or sex."
"Foreplay is sex," Bones responded logically.
"No, Bones," he told her. "For me, foreplay is only one bite of the taco. Why settle for that when I can have the whole taco."
Her lightening fast mind caught him in a fun innuendo, and she decided to pounce on it. "So you're comparing my genitalia to a food item you purchase from Taco Bell?" she asked.
His jaw hung down in shock. She'd still used some squint talk, but she'd actually made a damn good joke! "Just returning the favor, Babe," he reminded her. "Or don't you remember ordering me to haul out Jr. the other night for some attention and calling him your LONG, THICK, TASTY ZUCCHINI? Using a possessive, too, Bones. Naughty, Naughty." He wasn't about to tell her that when she'd said that he'd almost strutted around the room like one seriously proud peacock. As it was Jr. had given an extra generous performance that night.
"Men are supposed to be flattered with such complimentary comparisons," she argued. "Women are degraded when it is done to them in return," she added in a totally nonsensical rebuttal. Booth loved Mexican food almost as much as he loved Thai, so him comparing her most intimate bit to his favorite Mexican dish was flattering in her opinion. Not that she'd ever tell him that. He was too willing to use her words against her. "And while using a possessive in relation to your genitalia is somewhat arcane and degrading, I can't help how I feel. If some other woman tried to have it, you don't want to know the consequences. Especially to you."
Even though he would never dream of cheating on Bones, he cringed at the mental image of what she would do to him if he did. There wouldn't be enough evidence to convict a flea, let alone a jealousy crazed Forensic Anthropologist girlfriend. The one sliver of a silver lining in that statement of hers, though, was the strong implied commitment to monogamy. That was one Hell of a victory in his opinion.
"What do you think of Beckett and Castle?" Bones asked when she decided he didn't want to risk answering her joke. Her skills at teasing him and making jokes must be improving, she mused.
"They're good," Booth admitted as he booted up his laptop and networked with hers so he could follow what she was working on. He was very careful about his networking as she had let him know he would have no gonads left if he tried to get into any of her non-work related files which contained the drafts of her new novels. "He's a bit flaky, but looks outside the box. His stories seem to move the investigations along."
"Beckett has a very analytical mind," Bones said approvingly.
"They're a good Yin and Yang," Booth agreed. He'd thought Castle was a nut when he started spouting out possible scenarios, and Bones had given the guy the iciest glare he'd ever seen her give anyone, but he had to admit that the man had been dead on in the end. Bones still had a bit of a hard time accepting any kind of theorizing without any supporting science to back it up.
"You should have let me remove him from the Lab," Bones said with a glare in Booth's direction.
"You would have thrown him off the platform head first, Bones!" Booth argued. "And he was right!"
"He was lucky," Bones shot back.
"I don't think so, Bones," Booth replied. "I had a talk with their colleagues in New York. Esposito said the guy's rarely wrong."
"They certainly argue a lot," Bones continued.
"So do we," Booth reminded her.
"We bicker, Booth, not argue," she rationalized.
"Don't tell Sweets this, but bickering is arguing, Bones," he told her sympathetically. He loathed the idea of letting the twelve year old know that he agreed with him on anything. It would mess up the perfect Therapist/Patient dynamic they had going.
"So when we bickered the other night on what panties would be the most comfortable for a woman in an everyday setting, we were really arguing?" she asked, a smile on her face. It was amazing to her the variety of subjects that they would go off on tangents about.
"It wasn't bickering or arguing, Bones," he told her. "I'm not a woman so there's nothing I could legitimately argue on the subject. It was simply an intellectual musing on an important subject."
"Castle would have argued the point," she told him.
"If I find him debating anything having to do with your clothes, body, or sex with you I'll rip his nuts off," Booth told her self-righteously.
"I don't think Beckett would appreciate that," Bones said as she saved the last of the paperwork and sent it off to Hacker's e-mail.
"They're not involved, Bones," he told her. He was damn sure of that.
"So they're like we were before we started our relationship," Bones mused.
"Exactly," Booth replied.
"Perhaps we should talk to them and see if we can get them together," Bones mused.
"Excuse me?" Booth asked, quite stunned. "Did you just suggest that we do a little matchmaking?"
Bones chuckled. It was such an Angela thing to do that she could understand his shock, especially as she had a very definite negative view of such activities in ordinary circumstances. "Yes," she replied simply.
"Uh, why?" he asked, now very confused. He almost turned on the news to see if the world was coming to an end or something equally horrendous to be causing Bones to want to play matchmaker.
"Because I'm not clueless, Booth," she told him, dropping the humor and adopting a serious tone. "I can see that they are very good together. They complement each other, not only professionally, but personally, too. Castle is obviously in love with her. Beckett is still trying to understand it. In many ways I see the two of us early on in them. We made a lot of mistakes with each other, Booth, and wasted so much time. Would it be so terrible to see if we can possibly help two others avoid the hurt and anguish we caused each other and went through?"
"No," he conceded. "It wouldn't be terrible at all. But they have a lot of issues to work through, and some of them we didn't have."
"Like what?" she asked.
"The big one is money," he informed her.
"But we had that issue, too, Booth," she reminded him as she shut down her laptop and then went over and sat down next to him on the sofa, leaning into him slightly, loving the warmth of him that seemed to radiate in waves whenever she was near.
"But by and large you live simply, Bones," Booth told her. "Yeah, you're a millionaire a whole bunch of times over, but with the exception of your artwork and artifacts, no one could tell it just by looking at you. Castle, though, is just as rich, but is a really flamboyant guy. Beckett is a working stiff like me, and while it wasn't easy for me to understand that my pride was fucked up on this one, it'll be a Hell of a lot harder for her. It'll be staring at her in the face at every turn."
Bones nodded slightly, understanding the point, and seeing the logic in it. "What else?" she asked.
"He's basing a series of novels on her, and isn't just using her as a template, but is actively around her for research while they solve cases and everything," he observed. "For all our differences Bones, and no matter how much Andy Lister is based on me, your writing is a sideline for you, a way to deal with all that you see and experience. For him it's his career. Is she ready to make such a transition?"
"Were you upset that I waited until we were involved before admitting I based Andy on you?" she asked.
"No," he told her after a minute. "I already had that one figured out, just like everyone else who knows us. I just figured that you would tell me when you were ready."
She breathed a sigh of relief. She knew how he felt about honesty and integrity. He'd never asked her bluntly if he was Andy, so she'd used his meandering manner about asking about it to avoid answering it with complete honesty.
"Do you think they should be together?" she asked him.
"Despite all that I just said, yeah," he responded. "I do. And I think it would work out for them."
"Then can we help them?" she asked, very seriously.
"We can talk to them when we have lunch before taking them to the airport," he conceded. He would never understand Bones. She would always surprise him. Matchmaking?!?!?! Who would have ever guessed.
Bones got a grin on her face. "How about we go back to my place and you can work on finishing your taco?" she purred, a twinkle of lust, and also love, in her eyes.
Booth jumped up with enthusiasm. "After the talk we just had?" he winked. "I may just need a couple of helpings."
"My thoughts exactly, my long, thick, tasty zucchini," she winked with a deliberate look at his growing bulge as she grabbed her purse and walked out of the office, a definite "come and get it" sway to her hips.
"I knew we were made for each other," Booth said under his breath as he rushed out after her. Castle and Beckett could wait until later. Now he was hungry for a spicy Mexican dish. Bones was as spicy as they came, in his opinion.
A/N: As this is a crossover, I wanted the opening chapter to be more Booth/Bones oriented. Whether I continue or let this be a standalone will depend on the reviews. I don't ordinarily beg, plead, or ask fro much in the way of reviews, though I deeply appreciate and love all the reviews I get, but on this one I want to know if this crossover is a good idea. If it continues, the next chapter will be Castle and Beckett discussing Booth and Bones, while, naturally, remaining oblivious as to their own situation. I hope you all enjoyed this one. Gregg.