The Grease Monkey and the Princess
Rated: T
Disc: Not my gals, and I make nooooooooo claim to their sexuality.
Main characters: Nattie Neidhart, Melina Perez
Mentions of: HBK, John Morrison, Big Show, Joey Mercury
Summary: Mickie makes all the single folks backstage take part in a company-wide blind date-athon.
Pairing: Nattie/Melina
A/N: This here is for Simply_Cath for the Spring Slash Prompt! I hope you like it Cath! :D It was too good to pass up!


Melina looked down at her cell phone. The digital numbers flashed 7:57 at her. Her 'blind date' was supposed to be here by 7:30. "This is so stupid. I don't know why I let Mickie convince me to do this." She mumbled crossing her arms angrily across her chest.

Every single member of the WWE was to put their name in a hat, and Mickie picked that person's date. Only Mickie knew who was dating who. She let out a sigh, looking around the restaurant nervously hoping to see her date show up. There were already some mishaps with Mickie's grandiose scheme. Thankfully for her entertainment's sake, everyone was required to have their date here to avoid confusion. Big Show somehow wound up with Shawn Michaels, which prompted an angry (and apparently still smarting from their break up) Chris Jericho to dump his glass of wine all over Big Show's new suit.

The waiters were still scrubbing the massive red stain out of the carpet. She giggled slightly and turned her attention on her ex, watching as John found out who his date was. Beth scowled at him from the other end of the table. Apparently she didn't find pretty men like John very attractive. Melina frowned a bit, not sure how she felt seeing John with another girl, even though Beth didn't seem that interested. It was for the best, really. It was a mutual split for them to try out other relationships before they went on to the next stage. She picked up her water glass, swirling it around slightly as she watched the ice cubes clink softly together. Her date was obviously more than just late. She fidgeted in her seat slightly, glancing every couple of seconds to the doorway to see if anyone was coming.

8:15. She sighed and slowly put her phone away into her purse. "Maybe I'll just go." She murmured and picked up her sequined clutch. She kept her eyes down cast on her clutch as she fumbled slightly with the strap, wondering just how long she was expected to wait.


Melina glanced up and there was the one and only, Nattie Neidhart. "Nattie? Are you my…" She frowned slightly; this was supposed to be a black tie dinner, and here Nattie was dressed in ripped up blue jeans and a beat up Hart Dynasty tee shirt. The blonde's pretty face was covered in black streaks instead of any trace of make-up, matching the several other smears of grease she had down her arms, and on her jeans. "Date?" She finished and made a face.

"Um, I think so. I'm sorry I'm late, my car broke down and I had to walk here. Couldn't figure out what was wrong with it, but at least I tried. Why's everyone dressed up?" Nattie sat down at the table, putting her arms up on the table.

Melina quirked an eyebrow. "Nattie, this is a five star restaurant. This isn't some grease monkey pit. You were supposed to come dressed up to this!" She pointed to her perfectly done up do, accented with a large star gazer lily. "Levis do not equal Versace gowns!"

Nattie looked at Melina's plunging purple deep v neckline gown and shrugged. "I don't know, it looks like you're trying to put out for me. Was that your goal; because you're falling out of that gown. I'll take my levis any day."

Melina tugged her shrug around her shoulders, feeling self conscious. "Excuse me! Maybe if I got one of the male members of the Hart Dynasty they'd be a little more impressed."

"Maybe." Nattie reached over and took Melina's water. "Mind if I? Good. Thanks!" She said gulping it down before Melina had a chance to react. "That was a long walk!" She brought her fist up to her chest, thumping on it lightly until she let out a quiet burp. "Ofh. Sorry. Drank that water too fast."

"…Are you trying to embarrass me? I'm trying to be open minded about having a date with a woman, but you're not swaying me any. It's like having a date with Joey Mercury!" She grumbled and tossed her clutch on to the table in defeat.

"Well excuse me, Princess, but I wasn't raised to be a girly-girl. This isn't me! This isn't any fun- everyone looks really uncomfortable. If this whole stupid WWE blindate-athon was held at a more relaxed atmosphere, I bet everyone would be having way more fun regardless of who they're with." Nattie frowned back at Melina and crossed her arms across her chest. Nattie's arms left sizeable grease stains on the white linen. Melina's face scrunched up.

"You're a mess. Why didn't you clean up before you came in?"

Nattie shrugged. "I didn't want my date to feel like they were stood up. I felt bad. But had I known you were my date and you were going to be this bitchy, maybe I wouldn't have rushed."

Melina's upper lip twitched. "You know, Nattie, I would have rather you cleaned up then shown up looking like you worked on a car for eight hours." She stood up scowling at the other woman. "If you're having such a miserable time, you can leave. I'll go to the bar- I could really use a drink right now."

Nattie sighed watching the other woman storm out of the restaurant. Melina really did look pretty. She really put the effort into tonight. She picked up the spoon and glanced at herself in the reflection. "Man…" She grumbled, putting a couple of strands behind her ear.


Melina sat at the bar, her lily pulled out of her up do and discarded on the mahogany surface. Her slender fingers grasped at the stem of her glass, staring down at the red wine with a frown.
"Stupid Nattie. Stupid Harts. Stupid Canada! Why doesn't anyone have any manners anymore?" She put her head down on her arms with a sigh. She felt a warm hand on her back, prompting her to look out of the corner of her eye. "What do you want?"

Nattie sighed. "I'm sorry. I didn't know this meant so much to you. I thought it was a big joke."

"Obviously." Melina made a face at her and glanced quickly over her shoulder to see if there was a grease smear there.

"I washed my hands!"Nattie said defensively.

"Thank god for small favors."

Nattie snickered a little. "Yeah, whatever Princess. Come on, I owe you a date."

Melina quirked an eyebrow. "You really want to go back in there?"

Nattie fidgeted a little looking toward the restaurant. She rubbed her arm sheepishly. "No, I was hoping we could go for something else."

Melina glanced briefly at her glass and then at Nattie. Slowly she got off her stool, grabbing up her clutch. "Alright, let's get the hell out of here. But the restaurant better be nice. No greasy spoons."

"No greasy spoons." Nattie promised as the two women left the restaurant.


"Nattie, this is a greasy spoon." She scowled, looking over her menu at the woman sitting across from her.

Nattie gave Melina a curt look. "No, this is Denny's. Denny's is not a greasy spoon. Your standards are too high."

Melina tossed the menu down on the table. "Yours are too low! I can't believe this. I can't believe I'm in a Denny's in a Versace gown." She moaned and rubbed her temples.

"You know what, me neither. You really look awkward sitting there." She snickered slightly. "Come on, would ya try and relax? You might have a little fun."

The waitress came over to the table, pen and pad in hand. "Can I help you ladies with anything?"

"I'll just have a salad and a glass of water."

Nattie rolled her eyes. "I'll have… chicken fingers and a milk shake."

"…I'll take a milk shake too." Melina said quickly. She spotted the little smirk on Nattie's face. "…What, it sounded good. John doesn't drink milkshakes. It's too many pointless calories. It's been so long since I had one."

"Well then have one! I don't care. I like milkshakes. You could stand to drink a milkshake, Melina." She chuckled a little.

Melina strummed her nails on the table, searching for anything they could talk about. "So… you like women?"

"…If I didn't, would I be having dinner with one? What about you, I thought you were together with John Morrison?"

"We decided to take a break- see if we're meant for each other, or if there's someone else out there. I never dated a woman before, so how could I tell if I didn't if I never tried it?" She shrugged a shoulder. "Like I said, so far dating you is like dating Joey Mercury. So it's not that different."

"Joey Mercury sounds like my kind of guy then." Nattie teased.

The two women stayed quiet, letting an awkward silence drift over them. The waitress came over, carrying over their food. Melina dug into her salad finding the taste, like her company, not too bad. She reached for her milkshake, taking a sip out of it. "Oh damn, that's good." She moaned. "I forgot how great these were."

Nattie cut into her chicken fingers. "Well yeah, it's ice cream. How could ice cream not be good?"

"Point made. Thanks for coming to the bar, Nattie. I really am having a pretty decent time." She toyed with her straw in her milkshake, drawing little circles in it. "I never thought I'd be having such a great time with you, Nattie. You're so… different."

Nattie cocked an eyebrow. "Different bad, or different good?"

"Different good! I wasn't sure what to think about you. But you're like… a comfy pair of jeans. I can talk to you. I can joke with you. And you're such a great athlete… but I guess that comes with the genes, right?"

Nattie nodded. "It's literally in my blood. You're good too, Melina. You improved really fast. Plus, I like the scream."

Melina flushed slightly. "I think it'd pretty funny. The fans get a kick out of it." She shrugged. The two of them went back to eating. Food began to vanish; milkshake glasses that were once full were now empty. Melina reached for her clutch once the bill came to take her money out.

"No, nooo don't. I'm going to pay." Nattie quickly grabbed up the money from her jeans pocket. She paid the bill, leaving a nice tip for the waitress. "It's my treat. Put the money toward another Versace gown."

"Hah hah." Melina tucked her money into her clutch. "You should get one sometime. You'd look great."

"Like I said, princess, not my style." She shrugged her shoulder and put a casual arm around Melina's shoulder as they left the restaurant.


The two women walked down the hotel hallway, Melina holding up her hand briefly. "Hey, hold up. This is my room. Look, Nattie- I had a great time." Melina paused a little. "I think… despite the rough beginning… we had a pretty nice night."

Nattie nodded and put her arm around the back of her head sheepishly. "Yeah… true. I wouldn't mind having another one. What about you?"

The shorter woman fumbled briefly with her clutch with a shy smile slowly forming. "I'd like that. Maybe we can coordinate what we're both wearing next time."

"I don't know you and your fancy pants dress looked so out of place at Denny's it was great." She snickered slightly. "Well… I'll see you around then. We'll have to plan for another date sometime soon." She grinned. "Do… I get a good night kiss?"

Melina blushed a little. "A little one; it's the first date." She leaned forward a little on her Jimmy Cho heels, waiting expectantly for the kiss.

Nattie snickered slightly. "A little one, huh? Alright." She grabbed the other woman around her curvy waist, pushing her up against the wall. She kissed Melina's full, soft lips hard- catching the smaller woman off guard. Melina's arms flailed around slightly, pushing at Nattie to get off of her. She nearly caved, wanting to give in when she felt Nattie's tongue sweep across her lips. Finally she got enough leverage to push Nattie off.

"That was not a little kiss!" She yelped and chucked her clutch at Nattie.

"Nope. But I'm not sorry." Nattie winked and picked up her clutch. "Night princess. See you around." She ran her hand down Melina's arm briefly, giving her a wink before heading down the hallway.

Melina sputtered slightly, muttering soft curses as she dug the key card out of her clutch despite the big smile on her face.