Chapter 18 "Come This Far"
Disclaimer: WH & NKR here. We write dirty wolf fic. We aren't SM. Sadly, Mormon just isn't a good look on us SSH's (Southern Smut H00rs).
A/N: Warning, you may not want to read this chapter at work. We'll leave it at that and let you move forward at your own risk of drooling on the keyboard.
It's undeniable how brilliant you are
In an unreliable world you shine like a star
It's unforgettable now that we've come this far
It's unmistakable that you're undeniable
"Undeniable" - Mat Kearney
"It must be hard for you, with most everyone being paired off. Do you- do you want to imprint? Are you ready for that?"
All I want to do is to turn her around, kiss her soundly and then tell her the truth. I never wanted to imprint. I was content before she came into my life. There was no way I could have ever been ready for her. But now that I have imprinted, I realize just how empty my life was before her. Whether I like it or not, whether I wanted to imprint or not, Lillah is my life now.
I cringe internally, hating myself for what I'm about to say, but knowing that it's my fault I'm in this position. If I had told her right away what happened, I wouldn't have to hide things from her now. Still, I'm as honest with her as I can be, telling her as much as I can without giving the secret away, "I, uh, I've never been interested in imprinting. But it's not like marriage, you don't get to decide if you're ready. It just, happens. The perfect girl is standing right in front of you, and you just know. No questions asked, she is the one. In that second, she becomes your life. It's no longer gravity holding you to the ground, it's her."
"As for everyone being paired off, well, I guess I never really noticed. After my mom, I just, I needed some time to myself. The idea of someone depending on me again, being responsible for someone -anyway, I've got you now. You can be my 'plus one'."
I may not be able to share thoughts with Lillah like I can with the wolves, but I can tell she isn't completely thrilled by the idea of being my 'plus one'. Of course, I should have figured, why would someone as wonderful as Lillah ever want to lower herself to be with someone like me? It's stupid of me to think she could ever be happy with me. We are only friends right now because of the pull she feels. As much as I hate the thought, I'm sure she'll leave me as soon as a better guy comes along. But, until that time, I'm going to do my best to be the perfect friend for her.
Lillah's hands moving against my thighs brings me out of my thoughts. While I haven't strayed far from her navel, Lillah is starting to explore more. Her fingers are pressing into and moving higher up my thighs. I know I should stop her, but her light, innocent touches are like nothing I've ever experienced before. The women from my past could never compare to how Lillah makes me feel.
Wanting to help her relax and encourage her exploration, I move my hands to her shoulders, gently kneading. I try not to put too much pressure on the bruised areas, just in case. "I am sorry about your neck and shoulder. Does it hurt?"
Lillah shakes her head, but I can feel heat building on her neck, "No, it doesn't hurt. It felt- I mean, I liked it when-"
I tilt my head down to whisper against her ear, "Are you trying to say it felt good and you liked it when I sucked and bit at your neck and shoulder?"
"Yeah, oh wow, yes." Goose-bumps appear all over Lillah's arms and her hands tighten on my thighs. I feel her body shake for just a second.
"Good," I begin to slowly, run my tongue down the shell of her ear until I reach her earlobe. Being as gentle as I can, I tug her earlobe into my mouth and bite down with my front teeth.
Lillah gasps, turning her head as soon as I release her earlobe. She quickly turns her body to face me, returning one hand to my raised knee, the other burying deep in my hair as her lips descend to mine.
As soon as our lips touch I'm lost. I wrap my arms around her, pulling until her chest is against mine. She opens her mouth to me, her tongue meeting mine, hesitant but hungry, needing to feel. Both of her hands have moved to my chest but she seems to be whimpering. I pull back reluctantly, not wanting to break the contact. I resist the urge to begin to attack her neck and shoulders again, instead outlining the shell of her other ear with my tongue.
"What? Tell me what you want, Lillah," I whisper against her ear before dropping tiny kisses from her earlobe to her chin.
"May I- I want to feel- your chest." It takes Lillah a moment, but she does manage to speak what's on her mind. Seeing her slowly become more comfortable voicing what she wants makes my heart bump in my chest.
I lean back just slightly before tugging my shirt up and over my head, tossing it on the floor next to the couch. "Feel away, sweet Lillah."
Lillah's eyes are wide, her bottom lip tucked in her mouth. I slide lower on the couch, pulling her hands until they are flat against my abs, "You can't hurt me physically. I'll even try to behave."
"I don't think you know how to behave." Lillah's eyes twinkle with laughter as her fingers tentatively start exploring, tracing the outline of my abs, "How much do you work out?"
"What? How do you have a body like," Lillah waves one of her hands above my chest, "THIS if you don't work out?"
I have to laugh at Lillah's indignation over my lack of a work out, "I patrol every day for three to four hours, which involves running all over the reservation and, now, up here to Forks. Plus cliff diving and just wrestling with the other wolves pretty regularly."
"Oh. Did you not patrol in Forks before?" Her fingers dancing across my abs are driving me crazy. I want to pull her to me but I'm trying to let her take her time getting accustomed to my body.
Without thinking I respond to her question, "No, Jake patrolled up here pretty regularly because of Ness, but we usually only patrol on the reservation."
Lillah's hands pause as she reaches my pecs, "So, why are you patrolling up in Forks now? I mean, if Jake is here."
"You really have to ask?" Lillah's eyes lock with mine; she has a puzzled look on her face.
I lift myself from the couch so that we are eye-to-eye, cupping her face to hold her still, "I patrol up here in Forks because you are here. All alone. I wasn't joking before, being around us, it puts you in danger. Paul patrols late morning, early afternoon, so I know you are safe at school since that's the only time Rachel is away from Paul. But before and after school, there isn't anyone here to watch out for you. Beyond just getting to spend time with my beautiful and sexy friend, being here means I can protect you. Believe me, if I had my way, there would be someone guarding you at all times."
Lillah rolls her eyes, pushing gently against my chest, "Embry, you can't be here all the time. You need a life too."
"I don't know, I'm kind of liking my life right now. A beautiful woman willingly rubbing her hands all over my chest, it doesn't get much better than this. Now if I could only get her to share her M&M's with me, that would be perfect," I have to laugh when she narrows her eyes at me.
Lillah stands from the couch, grabbing the bag of M&M's. While she stands up, I take the opportunity to stretch out on the couch, taking up the whole length with my legs. When she turns around, Lillah laughs and puts one hand on her hip and taps her foot, "And just where am I supposed to sit now?"
I grab her hand from her hip and pull, "On my chest."
"Embry! I can't do that, I'll crush you!"
"No you won't! Lillah, you weigh next to nothing, but if you are really worried, you could always straddle me. You know, putting more of your weight on your knees instead of me." I do my best to keep my face clear of the excitement that is coursing through my body at the thought of Lillah's lush thighs wrapped around any part of me. I am such a sick fuck.
"Straddle you? I…I don't…is that a good idea, Embry?"
I smirk at Lillah echoing my words from earlier, "Probably not."
She grins broadly, "As long as we both know that."
Lillah places the bag of M&M's on my chest then swings one leg over me, straddling my thighs. She hovers above me, like she is unsure where to sit. I wrap my hands around the back of her thighs and pull her up to my chest. When she passes over my hips it takes everything in me to keep from stopping, but I manage to ignore my dick and keep pulling her up, away from the 'danger zone'.
Once she's just over my abs, I move my hands to her knees, helping her to lower her body. I hold my breath until I feel her lovely ass against my stomach. I can also feel the heat coming from between her thighs; I try to ignore that sensation. I keep my thoughts on that to myself, knowing if she had any idea that I could feel her, she would be off of the couch like a shot.
Lillah smiles before returning her hands to my chest, running them up to the bag of M&M's. When she opens the bag she frowns a little then looks at my chest. I'm puzzled by this reaction, "What, Lills?"
"You really do run a higher body temperature, you melted the M&M's. A few are stuck together in the bag." She pours some into her hand to show me, "Look!"
I'm already sliding my hands under her shirt, itching to lift it, but I have to smile at the candy she's showing me, "They'll still taste good, even if they are a little melted. I like my treats soft and sweet."
One of Lillah's eyebrows lift in surprise, "Soft and sweet, huh?"
I close my eyes when Lillah drops an M&M in my mouth, "Perfect balance of soft and sweet," I whisper, then lick the melted chocolate off of my lips.
"Watching you eat candy should probably be against the law," Lillah is staring at my mouth when I open my eyes. I have to chuckle at the glazed over look on her face.
I easily take the bag of candy from her. Pouring a couple in my hand, I offer her one. She takes it in her mouth and closes her eyes. My fingers linger on her lips, "Don't you just love the hard peanut wrapped in the soft and sweet chocolate?"
Lillah moans softly, her eyes still closed. I place another candy against her lips and she quickly opens her mouth. But before I can pull my finger out, she wraps her lips around my finger, sucking on the candy and my finger. Her tongue does a slow, torturous lap around my finger before she opens her mouth again to release my finger. Well, shit.
"God woman, that mouth of yours is going to kill me," I mutter.
Lillah blushes lightly but grins, placing another candy in my mouth. I do the same to her, trapping her finger in my mouth. I add a little suction along with my tongue lapping her finger. Lillah starts pushing her lower body against me, her hips making small circles in time to my tongue. When I finally release her finger, she doesn't immediately remove it, instead dragging it down over my chin.
Lillah leans forward and places a small kiss on my chin before continuing her finger's descent over my throat to my collar bone. "Hmm, no bite mark."
I smile, "No, I heal pretty quickly and with my darker skin, it wouldn't really show up anyway. I wish it did though. I would proudly show it off."
Lillah chuckles softly, "Men."
She sets the bag of candy down on the floor, letting both hands move across my chest. When she tentatively runs the pad of one finger over my nipple, I nearly jump off the couch, the sensation too much for me.
Instead I close my eyes and clench my fists at my sides. A low moan escapes my lips, "Fuuuu-uck!"
Lillah pauses for a moment, worry in her eyes. I speak quickly, to comfort her, "No, baby, it's good. I promise. I've just never- God, I love when you touch me."
"Oh, good. I like touching you," she admits shyly. Lillah's eyes light up as she places a small kiss on the center of my chest. My heart is racing at the feel of her soft lips, her hands on me. I need to touch her like she is touching me.
"Lillah, I want to feel you too. Will you take your shirt off for me?" She hesitates for just a second before nodding her head. She lifts her arms and grips the hem of her shirt. I can tell she's a little nervous, so I place my hands at her waist, rubbing small circles to soothe her. I can feel the tremor that runs through her body, but she doesn't stop, pulling her tank top off for me. Of course, she still has a bra on, but the sight of her creamy white skin above me drives me wild. She is beautiful. She is perfect. I don't think I'll ever get used to the sight of her, the swell of her breasts peeking over the top of her bra, her gorgeous smile.
Unable to stop myself, I brush the pad of my thumbs over a pert nipples, through her bra. She gasps, whispering my name as her breath hitches. She arches her back slightly, pressing her chest toward my hands as her hips press down against my torso. The most amazing sounds are coming from her mouth, though she isn't saying anything, other than whispering my name amongst her whimpers and soft moans.
I slide my hands back, slowly releasing the clasp on her bra and freeing her glorious breasts. They are just as beautiful as I remember. Full, round perfection with pink tips. I sit up so we are bare chest to bare chest. The movement causes Lillah to slide lower, she's now straddling my hips, nearly on top of where I want to feel her most. Trying to stay focused on her, I brush my lips against hers briefly, "You feel so damn good against me."
Lillah is still slowly moving her hips in small circles, the movement, now so close to my excruciatingly hard cock, is driving me crazy. I'm holding her against my chest now, my hands splayed across her back, trying to regain control of myself. But this time, Lillah has other plans.
She once again places a small kiss against my chin, then slowly kisses up my jaw until her mouth is pressed against my ear. I can feel the heat of her blush beginning across her torso and I know I'm in trouble. "I love how you feel against me. All of you."
With that statement, she slowly pushes herself down my body until she reaches my throbbing cock. Even through her yoga pants and my jeans I can feel the heat rolling off of her. I want to push her forward until she's flat on the couch, her legs wrapped around my hips as I bury myself in her.
"Lillah, this probably isn't a good idea. I'm too close," I'm speaking through clenched teeth, doing my best to hold on to the last little bit of control I have.
"I know, I can- feel. I think I am too," that is probably the last thing she should be telling me at this moment.
I hold on to her as I lay back down on the couch, her chest still flush with mine. Even though I know I shouldn't, I slowly move my hands from her back to her hips. I speak softly against her ear, "May I feel how close you are Lillah?"
She sits up just a little, so her nipples are just barely touching my chest. Lillah nods once as her hips continue their pattern against my bulging jeans. I want to pick her up, carry her into the bedroom, strip both of us down and take her. Instead, I move one hand from her hip to the front of her yoga pants. I dip my hand gently into her pants, moving over her silky panties until I can cup her; I watch as her eyes roll back and she cries out, pushing her hips roughly against my hand as she grips my hair to remain steady.
I slowly push her panties aside, sliding two fingers along her silky folds. Her hips buck against my fingers and she tugs roughly on my hair, "Oh God, Embry. How do you always make me feel this way?"
I don't answer her question, knowing the only answer is to tell her the truth. Instead, I pull my hand from her pants, my eyes never leaving hers as I slide those two fingers into my mouth, licking them clean, "Fuck you taste good, Lillah. Better than any candy." I don't finish the rest of my thought because I don't want to scare her. I'd give anything to taste her, to make her cum on my tongue.
Lillah's eyes go wide then glaze over. She leans forward again, kissing against my chest. "Embry, please, help me."
"How would you feel about us helping one another? I can show you another way you can get off, if you'd like."
Lillah doesn't say anything, but she nods, licking her lips when she looks down at mine.
"Stand up then." Lillah looks at me, surprised, but she follows my directions. I stand, grabbing our clothes from the floor in case Angela comes home tonight, then easily pick Lillah up in my arms.
"Embry, what are you doing? I can walk!" Lillah is squirming in my arms.
"I know you can walk, but I like carrying you, you feel so amazing against me."
"Fine, it's your back that's going to give out."
I carry her into the bedroom, closing the door with my foot, then place her on the bed before returning to lock the door. As I turn back around I have to smile, Lillah, lounging on the bed is quite a sight. "You are light as a feather, no worries about my back. And you look too sexy for words on that bed. I'm going to take off your pants, if that's ok?"
She nods as I return to the bed. I quickly shed my jeans, glad I pulled boxers on earlier during my argument with Jacob. Wouldn't want to freak her out by being naked straight off. I lean over Lillah, kissing her forehead, both eyelids, the tip of her nose and finally brushing my lips against hers. "Lift your hips for me."
She does as I ask and I easily pull her pants off. I'm careful to make sure we both leave our underwear on. This is going to be difficult enough, but if we were both naked, I know I wouldn't be able to control myself. I would very likely confess everything to her and beg her to allow me to make love to her right away. Not a bad idea.
I clear my mind as I slide onto the bed, my body hovering over her. I'm careful not to touch her anywhere other than her lips. Lillah's fingers thread through my hair before she tugs me down toward her, and against my better judgment, I let her. She already has her legs spread out, waiting for me. As soon as our lower bodies connect, we both cry out in pleasure. Lillah immediately wraps her legs around my hips and uses her leg muscles to pull me tighter against her. "Oh. Oh God, Embry. So good."
I'm trying to hold myself together but my hips have a mind of their own, they are already moving, needing to feel more of her. She feels so good, her hot pussy pressing against me. I'm worried I might not be able to control my body anymore.
Not wanting to rush this, I roll over, placing Lillah directly on my cock, with just the thin material of our underwear separating us. My hands grip her hips, which have already started moving against me. If I thought she felt amazing before, it's nothing compared to this.
"I think you'll like this even more, Lills. You are in control. You can touch me wherever you want baby," I explain the change in positions.
As she moves her hips against me, I watch her, marveling at how comfortable she feels with me. Amazed at how she takes charge. Just with me.
"I'm so close, baby. I'm going to make sure you cum first, but I might cum too," I warn. "Don't be freaked out, ok? It's a good thing, and it's only because of you," I try to reassure her because I know that any second I will burst.
I loosen my grip on her hips, letting her find her own rhythm. As her hips start moving in tiny circles, she once again slides the pad of a finger across one of my nipples. This time I can't control myself, my hips push up against her. I can feel how drenched she is, as it seeps through our underwear, my cock is pushed harder against her folds. Lillah cries out at the contact, her body already so close to release. I imagine her completely naked, pressing her wet pussy against me, rubbing along the length of my cock until I can't take it anymore and push up into her.
I pull her shoulders down just a little until she's close enough for me to wrap my mouth around one of her nipples. Her bare tits have been quivering above me, teasing with every movement she makes. While I lavish one nipple, my fingers pinch and tease the other. Lillah's hips have found their rhythm now: push down, spin, two thrusts forward and repeat. The extra pleasure I'm offering with my mouth makes her moans and gasps increase in frequency.
When I pull back from her breasts to take a breath, she pushes me back to the bed. I glance up at her and grin when I notice the heavy lidded eyes, swollen lips and flushed skin. She's so fucking sexy. She continues her movements, but leans down, her mouth wrapping around my nipple, first her tongue flattening against it, then her teeth joining in. I gently pull her back, whispering, "God, Lillah." As much as I love what she's doing, I'm afraid she's going to make me lose my self control before I can take care of her.
She grins, but I can tell she's very close. She places her hands against my chest, using it for leverage, allowing her to press herself harder against me as she continues to slide over my aching cock. She looks so beautiful, riding me, that I can't help but picture what it would be like to have her naked with my cock buried in her. Lillah's vibrant hair caressing her bare skin, moving with her graceful body, her teeth biting into her bottom lip, her eyes dark and full of lust. Focus! Can't take her now.
"Feels so good, Em-," the catch in her voice tells me just what I need to know. She gasps and her eyes roll back.
"Do you need help with that last little bit, Lills?" I can tell she just needs one more little push to fall over the edge.
She whimpers and nods and I happily slip my fingers into her panties. I slide one finger between her folds, dipping it quickly into her. Lillah moans deep in her chest. I feel her walls tighten around my solitary finger and I'm shocked again at how tight she is. I can't imagine what it would be like to be in her. Heaven and hell. Excruciating pleasure that would make me lose my mind.
Moving my finger forward, I find her clit, pressing against it as Lillah's hips go crazy. She has lost her rhythm as she nears her release. She's mumbling now, "Embry, more, inside, please!"
I'm assuming she wants my fingers in her again and I can't ever deny her anything. This time I slide two fingers into her and we moan, together. She practically purrs when I stroke the walls of her pussy. A few more strokes of my fingers, a twist of her hips against my cock and I'm watching as her orgasm takes over. I want to be the only bastard that ever gets to witness this side of Lillah. Fuck! I'm so far gone with her I would probably rip any other man's dick off that even thought of coming near her. She's mine.
Can't think about that right now. Lillah riding out an orgasm is one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. I force myself to pay attention to her, to notice every detail, commit it to memory. As I watch, her entire chest turns bright pink and there is a small sheen of sweat that covers her as she pants erratically. She presses her hands against my chest, using it for leverage to press back against my cock while her body shakes violently against me. Her hair has fallen forward, brushing my chest as she rides out the waves, her back arched and tense. As if watching her isn't enough, the sounds coming from her mouth are so fucking sexy I could close my eyes and easily cum just listening to her.
I slowly slide my fingers out of her as she finishes. She kisses my chest before she leans down, collapsing on top of me. As she's resting, I know I can't stop myself, I have to finish what we started. With my fingers still wet with her cum, I dip my hand down into my boxers. Lillah's breathing has evened out, but when my hand moves to my boxers, she gasps. Her hand moves to cover my wrist.
"Lillah, I'm sorry, I have to," I apologize with a gravelly voice. "It was too much watching you. I need to cum," if she doesn't think she can watch this I'll have to leave her for a while. My balls are ready to stage a mutiny if I don't get off soon.
Lillah shakes her head then looks up at me briefly before looking away. Her fingers dance over my hand as she whispers almost so low I can't hear her, "I want to touch you, Embry. Please let me touch you."
The thought of her hand on my cock is almost too much to bear. I'm sure I will die at this point if she does touch me. But I'm also sure that I will die if she doesn't touch me. Either way, I need relief, now. Of course, either way, I will die without having fucked Lillah, like I desperately want. I want to push those panties aside and lose myself in her.
When she looks up at me, her eyes are wide, pleading, but I shake my head, not wanting her to feel like she has to do this, like it's expected. Like that asshole, Carter.
"Too much, too close right now, Lills."
"Please Embry, I need to," her eyes haven't left mine, but her hand has moved to rest over mine. I want to, but I can't keep telling her no, not when she is finally telling me what she wants and needs, not when she begs. I should probably keep that a secret too.
I close my eyes, unable to look at her, knowing I'm going to regret this, but I nod once. I don't even get the chance to open my eyes before Lillah's hand is moving off of mine and under the elastic of my boxers. Instead of gripping the shaft as I would have done, Lillah slowly slides one finger from the tip to the base. I'm grinding my teeth, trying not to cum at just her simple touch.
Once she reaches the base she lightly wraps her fingers around me, sliding upward. She doesn't have a lot of pressure, but just the feel of her fingers around me is testing my limits.
When her fingers reach the tip, her thumb slowly brushes over the head, spreading the pre-cum she finds there over the head of my cock. She once again slowly slides one finger from the tip to the base. This time when she wraps her fingers around me, she tightens her grip as she slides her hand upward.
I'm doing my best to stay still, but the feeling of her tiny hand finally touching me where I want her to most is killing me. As she's sliding her hand up, I thrust my hips up, which causes her hand to slide down my shaft, squeezing me tight. "Oh, fuck! Lillah!"
She once again slides her hand up, but she is tightening her grip now. Then she slides her hand down once, and my hips once again thrust up, needing to feel the tension of her hand around me.
"God, so good, Lillah!" I'm panting, but I want to teach her what feels good to me, I want her to know how she can easily satisfy me, "Tighter, baby. Let the skin come with you when you pull up, slide it and your thumb over the head when you stroke up."
Lillah's hand moves up again, this time pulling my foreskin up, sliding both it and her thumb over the tip.
"Fuck! Yes! Just like that baby. Shit you're a fast learner."
Lillah purrs against my neck, "You feel- I like- Mmm, I feel like I'm close again, Embry. How can that be?"
I've been so focused on my own near release I didn't realize Lillah was enjoying this just as much as I was. I slide my hand into her panties again. She's right, she is definitely close again. I easily slide two fingers into her tight heat; we both moan when I slip into her wet folds. Immediately she increases her strokes on my cock and she bites down on my chest, muffling her screams.
"Fuck you're wet, Lillah. All for me. You are turned on again just by stroking my cock." I pump my fingers in and out of her at the pace of her hand moving over me. We are both panting and on the edge.
"Pull that skin with you again, baby," I'm trying to concentrate, give her instructions but I'm so close I can barely get the words out now, "Thumb- run the underside- stroke down. I'm so close, fuck you're amazing." Lillah uses her thumb just as I told her, using short strokes now that I'm close. Knowing that watching her cum again will bring on my own release, I keep my two fingers moving in her as my thumb reaches for her clit. As soon as my thumb brushes over that sensitive spot, she is gone.
As her orgasm takes over, her hand starts convulsing around my cock. I reach my other hand into my boxers, placing it above her hand. I'm able to make sure I cum in my boxers but that is my last thought before I feel myself lose control. This is like no orgasm I've ever had before. All I feel is Lillah convulsing around my hand; her hand pulsing around me pulls one of the most powerful releases I've ever had out of me.
It takes me a few minutes to recover. Lillah has pulled her hand out of my boxers and has her head against my chest. Her breathing is still erratic, like mine, but she seems okay. Her lush body is soft against mine. I can tell she's relaxed and sated; it makes my heart swell, knowing I'm the reason for that.
I kiss the top of her head. When she looks up at me, she has the most beautiful smile on her face. She kisses my chest right above my heart before sliding up closer. She is grinning when she cups my cheek, lightly pressing her lips against mine. We lay quietly for a while before either one of us speaks.
"You have some catching up to do."
"I'm up to four and you only have one." Lillah is blushing as she speaks, but still smiling.
I have to laugh, "You are counting orgasms now? Shit, I'm corrupting you."
"You are corrupting me. But I also blame Emily and Rachel in my corruption."
I'm surprised by this admission, "Is that so? How have they contributed?"
"I'm pretty sure I know way more about what Sam and Paul like than I ever would want to know," Lillah blushes fiercely.
"Is that so? This might work out even better than I planned. You can be my spy. You get the imprintees to tell you all their dirty little secrets, tell me, and I use them on the other guys."
Lillah playfully smacks my chest, "Embry, I will not do that! Emily and Rachel are my friends."
"Oh come on, just one little thing? Or, better yet, tell me about one of the dreams you've had about me. I told you about mine the other night. It's your turn." I smirk when she turns her face down, her embarrassment evident.
But just when I think she's not going to say anything I hear her whisper, "Last night's dream was pretty similar to what just happened tonight. I mean, we didn't go as far in the dream, but, I was straddling your hips. I could feel you against me. And…mmmm"
Lillah's hand is once again moving over my abs, her delicate fingers tracing the patterns of the dips in my skin. "Did you like feeling me against you?"
Lillah doesn't look at me but I can feel her smile against my chest and I can hear her whisper, "Yes, but I liked it more tonight."
"And when you touched me? That was ok?"
Lillah nods but doesn't say anything. I want to keep her talking, get her accustomed to telling me what she does and doesn't like. And hopefully build up the confidence that Carter stole from her.
"Seemed like it was more than ok, though. It seemed to turn you on again. You were so wet when I touched you. Tell me what you liked about it."
"Mmm, I liked you telling me what felt good." Lillah still won't make eye contact with me.
But, she is talking, so I press her for more detail, "Is that all? Me telling you what felt good turned you on?"
"Yes. And touching you. Knowing that I made you feel that way. Hearing you say that you liked it. It turned me on to know I could be the one that made you feel that good, and I could be the one to help you."
"Lillah, will you please look at me?"
She blushes, but looks up. There is still a faint smile on her face. I pull her up my body until our lips meet. When I pull back reluctantly, I look into her eyes. They are still dilated, with just a small rim of grey around the edge.
"Now you know how it makes me feel when I help you. And when you tell me what you like."
Lillah looks down at my chin, not making eye contact as she speaks, "I don't know what I like, but I've liked everything you've done so far."
I chuckle, "That's good. If ever anything doesn't feel good, I want you to tell me, ok?"
Lillah sighs contentedly, "I can't imagine anything you'd do not feeling good, but ok."
I want to respond to that, but I keep my mouth shut. But inside my head, I'm screaming. I know of one thing that won't feel good. There is no way taking her virginity will ever be comfortable for her. And that's just one more reason why I can't have her.
I hear her suppress a yawn. I glance over at the clock, surprised how late it is. "Do I need to set an alarm?"
Lillah reaches over me, flips a switch on the clock then curls back up around me. "Done. Do not leave me in the middle of the night, promise?"
"I promise. Good night, Lillah."
"Good night, Embry."
Just like Saturday night, as soon as my head hits the pillow, I'm out. I don't have any dreams, and, more importantly, no nightmares while I sleep. I hold on to Lillah throughout the night, adjusting my body to hers but never losing contact.
I feel like I've just closed my eyes when the alarm goes off. I slap my hand on the table trying to shut it off as quickly as possible. Finally, I find the clock, managing to turn it off without breaking it.
Lillah is still curled up around me; her head on my chest, one hand tangled in my hair, the other holding on tight to my side, and her legs twisted around mine. If I didn't know any better, I'd think she was trying to wrap herself around me to keep me from leaving. Little does she know, I'm going to be here as much as I can. I'm never going to make the mistake of leaving her again, if I can help it.
Softly brushing her hair out of her face, I whisper as I kiss the top of her head, "Lillah, it's time to get up if you want to take that run."
"Don't want to run. Warm. Soft," Lillah whining about getting up is probably one of the most adorable things I've ever witnessed.
I can't quite suppress my laughter as I speak, "Yes, you are warm and soft all curled up around me, sweet Lillah, but if we don't get up, you won't have time for your run. I'd hate to be the reason why you miss your third morning run in a row."
Lillah grumbles against my chest, "Why? You're the reason I missed the first two."
"Hey! How can I be blamed for yesterday morning? I wasn't even here!"
"Exactly. If you'd have been here, maybe I wouldn't have overslept yesterday," Lillah places a kiss on my chin, grinning, "Good morning."
I have to shake my head at her logic, "I really don't get how women's brains work. It's a good thing you're so cute in the morning."
"Yeah, yeah. Come on, or I'll have to blame you for me being late again today," Lillah slides off the bed, keeping her back to me as she heads to the bathroom. I hate that we have to get going. I would prefer to spend all morning in bed with Lillah, but both of us have to get to work.
She quickly changes then offers me the bathroom. I quickly clean up from last night, removing my boxers before pulling on my jeans and sneakers. When I walk back into the bedroom, Lillah is putting her ear buds in. I follow her as she leaves the bedroom, walking out the front door to start stretching on the front porch. I close the door behind me and watch her graceful movements. Looking over her shoulder, she grins at me, "Aren't you going to stretch?"
"I run miles every day, no need. Besides, I like the view."
"Get used to it, that's the only view you are getting this morning. Come on wolf-boy, I'll race you!"
Lillah takes off down the porch, heading for her favorite trail. I easily keep up with her, but stay just a few paces behind, allowing her to get ahead of me. Not because I want her to think she's beating me, but because I want to see her hips swing, her ass move gently and the muscles of her thighs contract. In my twisted mind I imagine I'm chasing her to the bedroom, playing a game of cat and mouse before I fuck her senseless. God, I can't wait to do any number of things with her.
I shake my head, reminding myself I need to focus right now. The dream from yesterday evening flashes through my mind and I suddenly realize how far ahead of me she is. As we go deeper in the woods, I move up beside her, grinning at her stunned look. "What? I told you I run every day."
"Is there anything you can't do?" Lillah giggles and blushes as she continues running.
"I can't teach, that's all you and Rachel."
Lillah looks away but I can just hear her mumble, "You've been a pretty good teacher so far."
I grin broadly, but don't say anything. I know she knows I heard her, but neither of us says anything. Mostly because we both need to get to work and can't afford a distraction.
As we finish our run, Lillah heads for the front porch. I grab her arm and pull one of her ear buds out, "Come around back with me."
"Ok. What's going on?"
"Just stand over here, ok? When I tell you it's safe to look, turn around."
"Ok, but Embry, I have to go shower and get ready for school."
As I pull off my sneakers and jeans, images of Lillah in the shower bombard my mind. I try to control my body, but I can't control my mouth, "I know, and as much as I would love to join you in that shower, I need to get ready for work too. It's safe."
Lillah gasps when she turns around. Of course, I have my back to her, but still, I don't think she was totally expecting to see my naked ass first thing this morning.
"I promised you I'd phase in front of you when you were ready. If this is too soon, tell me and I'll go into the woods."
I hear her let out a little "O" before she rushes to say something, "No, it's fine. I want to see."
I nod once then close my eyes, clearing my mind of all thoughts except for those of the wolf. I can feel it taking over my body and before I know it, I'm shaking like crazy. Seconds later, I'm no longer human, but a giant grey wolf. I turn to look at Lillah, concerned that she is freaking out. In this form, my hearing is even better, and I can hear her accelerated heart rate from across her yard.
Before I can stop her, Lillah is approaching me. I want to yell at her to stop, that I'm dangerous in this form, but she keeps coming. When she stops in front of me, her face is a few inches below mine.
Lillah reaches her hand up, stroking the fur around my face. Her fingers lightly trail around my eyes and I hear her whisper, "Like a heart," before she places a small kiss against my muzzle. "You are so beautiful, Embry. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. Thank you. I'll be at Rachel's tonight, but I hope I get to see you later."
I bow my head, trying to convey to her that she will see me later. I run my nose along her cheek briefly, inhaling her scent before turning and running toward the forest.
I can sense Sam in my mind. He's laughing, having seen the images of me phasing in front of her.
I don't need Sam to tell me how deep I am into this. I'm screwed.
A/N: We warned you! Just a reminder that we are always around to talk about "Losing Control" or any of the other stories we've written. You can find us on Twitter (StupidLeeches) or on our website (www[dot]stupidleeches[dot]com). Other links to find us can also be found on those sites. As always, thanks to our amazing beta dailyicandy (daily[underscore]i[underscore]candy on Twitter) who pushes these chapters through like a mad woman and our awesome pre-reader morethanhuman who keeps us motivated by begging for more chapters! Don't forget to hit that little review button, let us know what you think! We reply to reviews and even pimp our favs over at http:/twificpimps[dot]blogspot[dot]com/search/label/hump%20wednesday (when WH remembers to submit)!