Summary: Afraid of everything, hated by most, life's not easy for everyone- especially not Bella Swan. Little does she know Edward Cullen is set to turn her life around. But what if he's just as damaged as she is? Can they help eachother, or are they past saving? A short, romantic, angsty story. Based off the Taylor Swift song, also called Fearless.
This is a new one from me! And one I'm hopeful for... if people like it I'll continue. It's going to be short-ish story, with about 10 chapters at most. I hope you all like it! Prepare for it to be a little bit depressing at first... it'll soon get a LOT happier though. And prepare for one of the fluffiest HEA's ever too.
If you like it, let me know!
"And I don't know how it gets better then this,
You take my hand and drag me headfirst, fearless.
And I don't know why but with you I'd dance,
In a storm in my best dress, fearless."
In this moment, as I stood here in the pouring rain in the darkness of midnight I knew one thing for certain.
I knew that now my life was no longer the miserable and lonely one I knew before… the one that was all I had known for seventeen years.
… And I also knew that it didn't matter that the girls at school were out to get me, it didn't matter that my mom still blamed me for my best friends death all those months ago. And it didn't matter that no one really likes me, or ever has.
… It didn't matter because I know that he does.
In these weeks he has taught me so much - he has helped me become myself, away from the lifeless shadow that I used to be.
I looked over at him, to see his green eyes gleaming with some unknown emotion. "Do you want to dance?" he asked me softly, brushing my wet cheek with his fingertips.
And even though it was crazy… being out in this rain, soaked to the skin, with only the darkness of the sky above us. It seemed that somehow these things only made the moment even more perfect.
We laughed as we danced and we swayed together, and then he began spinning us around together, so fast I was sure we were going to fall.
But I'm not afraid.
Because of what he kept whispering in my ear- "You are my life now… I love you, Isabella Swan."
"Imagine no possessions,
I wonder if you can?
No need for greed or hunger,
A brotherhood of man,
Imagine all the people,
Sharing all the world.
You may say I'm a dreamer,
But I'm not the only one.
I hope some day you'll join us,
And the world will live as one…"
Two Months Ago...
A night full of vivid dreams quickly faded away and before I knew it the darkness had passed and soon it was my least favourite time of day again. The morning… the start of a new day… oh, how I hated it.
I slowly, reluctantly opened my eyes, and looked out of the window, only to see the sight of grey again. The way that my bed was positioned meant that I always awoke to the sight of the window every morning, which meant that dismal skies that covered Forks for the majority of the year were always the first thing that I saw.
The skies that covered this dull town were just like my life… they always looking the same - bleak and unappealing.
As I yawned and stretched I noticed that it seemed like it was earlier then my normal time to get up, it looked even darker then usual.
So, why was I even awake at this time again...?
The nightmares rarely woke me, so it couldn't have been that.
I groaned loudly as I pulled the covers back over me, trying to salvage another hour of sleep. I knew if I managed it, that by the time I got up that it would only be me in the house… something that I always wished for.
As I began to drift again, wishing for the silence to still me, I became aware of an annoying buzzing - no ringing - sound coming from beside me. I prayed it would go away or just stop after a moment or two.
… No such luck.
I realised after a short amount of time that it was alarm clock making this noise, the time on it read 6am.
Meaning only one thing…
I glanced over to the calendar on my wall in panic, and sure enough it was the first day of September, and the start of senior year - the first day back at school after the summer.
Oh how I hate these days with a deep passion.
I hate how the time passed so quickly- the time spanning from June to September being nothing but a blur.
Admittedly the summer hadn't been enjoyable for me in the slightest. All I had done was spend the days working and secluding myself in this room, not having anyone to spend my time with.
However, I would choose staying home alone any day as compared to having to face them crowded halls of Forks high again.
Because all that did was remind me even more of how people felt about me- at least if I was at home I could pretend that the situation was different, and that I did have people out there who cared.
I slowly crawled out of the comfort and security of my bed, getting myself ready for the day, all the while mentally preparing myself for the day ahead.
I pulled on my comfy pair of baggy jeans and dark green sweater and chose to tie my hair up.
Funny how as I dressed simply and dreaded what was ahead of me, that I didn't realise how today's events would change everything.
I walked cautiously down the stairs, hoping that my dad Charlie had gone to work already, unfortunately when I walked into the kitchen my hope was erased as he sat reading the newspaper and drinking coffee just like every morning.
If people actually cared then they may ask me - why do I dread seeing Charlie?
To which, I would always answer with a surprising response- it wasn't because Charlie was mean to me, or beat me or anything remotely like that… actually, I would rather have them things then his actual way of acting around me.
No… the problem is that he ignores me.
Which basically means that most of the time he doesn't talk to me, or acknowledge me - apart from the times when I talk to him, which in that case he'll only reply with one worded answers if I'm lucky.
If I'm lucky… yeah right, I'm far from it.
I rushed past him noting that he didn't look up as I passed, and then I grabbed a couple of things from the cupboards trying to find something worth eating for breakfast, but as I turned back to face the table he was gone.
I sighed, trying not to let it affect me- I should be used to it by now after all.
I leaned against the cupboard, looking out of the window again, regretting it instantly - the weather looked impossible worse then usual today. I cringed at the sight of the heavy rain pouring down, making the green and grey colours of the street seem even more monotone.
I packed my bag quickly deciding on taking my rain coat as some sort of shelter, and then quickly walked out of the front door as I pulled the hood over my head and began the walk to school.
The wind was painfully cold, making me literally cringe, and cars splashed me as they passed along the road. For a moment I considered how convenient it would be to actually have a car of my own… maybe I can try saving some money from my job so I could get one? … I knew that I wouldn't need anything too extravagant, just simple and able to get me to places instead of having to walk and take the risk of getting sick everyday.
… Actually, that seemed unlikely. Who am I kidding? I got my job at the Café so that I can save for college - I can live without a car, but Dartmouth's my future… well, if I was to go ahead with college that is.
When I finally made it to school, everyone was already there, the car lot was full of cars, and groups of people all standing around talking and laughing… probably talking about their summer vacations and the start of the new year.
I passed them all, finding that it didn't really bother me when no one looked my way… it was something that I had grown used to. However, as I passed one last group of people, I heard them talking about some new students joining the school.
Only in a town as small as this would it be such huge gossip… back in Phoenix, the schools were so large that no one noticed when a new person came, they just seemed to blend in… unlike here.
It wasn't that long ago that I was the new girl here, and everyone felt that it was their duty to gossip about me, and then try to befriend me, simply because I was someone new… something different. In other words, some sort of meager excitement in this dull, bleak town. Only, that attention soon faded away quickly when they discovered what I was like.
Bitter. Cynical. Sad. Afraid.
I had my reasons though… and still do. I like things the way they are… I don't like to let people get close to me, and prefer to just stay in the shadows. I know that by doing that I can just be myself… I don't have to pretend to be happy, or to be something for anyone.
I'm fine with being alone…
Or so I keep telling myself.
I passed the group quickly, noticing that it consisted of Jessica Stanley, Mike Newton, Lauren Mallory and some others. They were the people who originally tried to befriend me, but who also gave up quickly. I tried not to listen to what they were saying but managed to pick up on a few words, which consisted of things like-
'A whole new family- three of them,'
'They moved here from Chicago, but no one knows why.'
'One is really handsome, but is apparently disabled,'
I blocked them out after that, unable to listen to what they were saying… do they honestly have no shame?!
I eventually made my way to my first class without any problem, and sighed resignedly when I found my seat. Once again, no one sat beside me and I was glad about that. At least now I could just lose myself in my thoughts, and not have to force casual conversation at all.
The teacher began talking, welcoming us all back for our final year, telling us how important it would be, but instead all I thought about was what happened… less then a year ago.
I pulled at the chain around my neck, lifting the locket out from under my top, and grasped it hard in my hand as I closed my eyes tightly, willing myself not to cry.
Even though the morning hours dragged by, it still didn't seem like long before it was lunch, and I found myself sitting in my normal seat in the far corner of the cafeteria. I only picked at my sandwich and apple I had bought from home, not feeling over hungry.
Sometimes a couple of people would sit at the end of my table, namely Angela Webber and Ben Cheney – we wouldn't talk, but it did help on the whole embarrassment thing. Because even though I did want to be left alone, I couldn't help but feel shame whenever I sat by myself, due to the looks I would get from other people.
Yeah… today was one of those days.
I ignored peoples stares as best as I could and quickly took a quick look around the room, glancing at the regular tables, at the cliques that never seemed to change.
I looked at them all, until I saw people I didn't know… who I had never seen before.
There were three of them, so I instantly knew that these were the new people that were being gossiped about earlier. They sat at a table in the opposite corner to me, and seemed oblivious to everything around them. The Hale Twins, Rosalie and Jasper were sitting with them, which surprised me – as they were famous for not talking to anyone but eachother – but now they seemed the complete opposite as they laughed and joked with the new kids.
Firstly, there was one girl who looked very petite and had black spiky hair, next to her there was a boy who had dark curly hair, and who was pretty much the opposite to the girl – mainly because he was very large and muscular.
And then… there was him.
He sat on the seat, which was the closest to the wall and seemed, like he was quieter then the rest of them – he still laughed, but not so much, and I never saw him say anything. They were all beautiful, but he was by far the most, with messy reddish brown hair, which could almost be called bronze, and with soft looking pale skin. The only thing that seemed weird about him was the fact that he was wearing black sunglasses – why would he need them in Forks and more importantly, indoors? It seemed bizarre, but perhaps he had a good reason, so I decided to ignore it.
And instead I just watched them all… I lowered my head so that my hair framed my face hiding it from anyone's view, and looked at them out of the corner of my eye. I watched as they all ate the food served here, grimacing at the meatloaf or whatever it was supposed to be. I smiled as I saw them joking, playing jokes on eachother, and found myself curious whenever they ended up in deep conversation.
It was then that something hit me… it was want. For a year I hadn't wanted to talk to anyone and hadn't wanted anyone to notice me, but in this moment… I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to be friends with them.
How crazy the thought was soon settled in, and I found myself embarrassed at my thoughts… I didn't even know them. I hadn't spoken to anyone of them… so why was I wishing to be their friends? I don't have friends… I don't have anyone. It's as simple as that.
I quickly picked up my bag and pulled it over my shoulder, feeling far too ashamed to be sitting in here anymore. I quickly ran out, not caring that people were looking or whispering about me, and made my way towards my next class just as the bell rang.
I put all my thoughts to the back of my mind and vowed to forget about last lunch and about them. It was in the past, and now I had to focus on the now… which was my English class.
I almost felt like smiling as I made my way to my seat - I loved English, it had always been my favourite class. It was something that I hadn't lost a year ago, as books… literature… writing… would always be a big part of me. Not to mention it was the only subject I considered myself to be good at.
The class was pretty much full now, save for one seat next to me, and I smiled at that. I was in the one subject I liked at school, and I felt okay. Nothing was going to mess this up for me, not anything or anyone…
"Okay, Edward, you can have the seat next to Isabella, I'll just show you…"
… Apart from him.
I looked up from my desk to see the teacher Mr. Greene, talking to him… the bronze haired boy I admired at lunch, the boy who was clearly called Edward. I summised that I liked that name… sure, it wasn't exactly popular nowadays at all, but it seemed to suit him.
"Isabella, can help you with your work…" Mr. Greene was explaining to him, his voice and actions sounding almost nervous or uncomfortable even.
Edward sighed, pushing his sunglasses, which he was still wearing, back into place. "I don't need any help," he muttered quietly.
His comment stung… he clearly must have taken one look at me and decided that he didn't want to talk to me at all.
Only, as Mr. Greene lead him to the desk, I suddenly realised the truth… just as everyone else in the room seemed to as well as they turned to look at him. I wondered how I hadn't noticed before… because Edward's actions, although smooth, were not confident. They were afraid and tentative, as if he didn't know where he was going.
And his sunglasses… they weren't just there was a fashion accessory… they were cover for his eyes.
… Because he was blind.
… And his comment about not needing help was not in offence to me… he didn't even know who I was or anything about me at all. But, instead his comment was about pride… he didn't want to feel like he was unable to do things just because of it, and he certainly didn't want other people thinking that.
He slowly sat in the seat beside me – the one that was against the wall – and leant his cane, which I somehow hadn't noticed until now against it. I was aware that I was staring, but couldn't find it in me to stop. It wasn't that I thought he was a freak or different… but that I was amazed by him.
Mr. Greene asked Edward if he was okay one more time, only receiving a nod in response, before he had to resign to the fact that he wasn't going to get much more then that. He made his way to the front of the class and told us to get our books out. I already had mine piled in front of me, so instead I watched out of the corner of my eye as Edward reached to pull his own books out of his bag, running his fingers along the front of them, before placing them on the desk too.
I only felt in even more awe of them when I noticed that they were in Braille… that was how he could figure out which ones he needed to use. Although along with the awe, I also felt sadness for him – not pity exactly – just sadness… because of his own heartbroken expression.
Mr. Greene told us all to skip to page 50, and gave me a pointed look. I swallowed hard, and turned towards Edward, knowing it would be more difficult for him.
"Erm, d-do you want help with that?" I asked him nervously - mostly nerves out of talking to such as beautiful stranger, and worrying what his response.
Somewhere in the back of my mind I also noted that this was the first time I had spoken out loud today… I tried not to think of it as a coincidence.
Edward let out a breath beside me, "No, I'm fine," he replied shortly, as he flicked through the pages himself.
I nodded, but then realised that he couldn't see that, so I muttered- "Okay then." As I felt foolish for even asking… it was clear already that he liked to do things for himself.
I heard him let out another soft breath and his expression change into a slight frown, as he listened to Mr. Greene talk. I decided to turn my attention to the class now… Edward didn't need my help, so I would focus on the subject that I loved as best I could.
The class passed quickly, and soon it was 10 minutes before the end. Mr. Greene told us we could spend the last ten minutes just talking amongst ourselves, or reading if we preferred- seeing as it was the first day back after all.
I pulled out my book Wuthering Heights and opened it up to the page I was last on, and prepared myself for a good ten minutes of reading, when a soft voice filled the space beside me-
"I'm sorry if I seemed rude earlier," Edward apologised, his head turned towards me.
I blinked a couple of times, surprised that he was talking to me and that he was actually apologising. After several seconds of surprise, I finally found my voice -"It's okay… I understand," I told him sincerely.
His eyebrows creased slightly, "You do?" he asked warily.
I nodded, and began talking without really thinking it through. "Sure… you're clearly able to do things for yourself, but you're tired of people thinking that you can't… you don't want to rely on people and want to be independent." I explained softly, watching a range of emotions flicker across his face, before apologising myself- "I'm sorry too."
He frowned, "there's no need to apologise," he whispered, lowering his head slightly.
I let out a breath, but couldn't think of anything to say… I didn't know what to say that wouldn't seem weird in this situation.
It was his voice however that broke the short silence, "so… please tell me that the weather isn't always this bad in this town," he murmured.
I laughed slightly, "I hate to tell you, but this…" – I glanced out of the window at the pouring rain – "is what we call good weather here."
He laughed quietly, "Great," he muttered to himself. "I think I'm actually going to miss the windy city, as crazy as that sounds."
I remembered people saying that they were from Chicago… I guess that was clearly true based on what he just said.
"That doesn't sound crazy," I whispered, thinking things through as I spoke - "I used to live in Phoenix… one of the most humid places in the US… I always complained about how hot it was. Yet I would give anything to go back there now," I explained, my voice growing sadder as I spoke. Needing the comfort, I pulled my locket back out from under my shirt so I could hold it again, relaxing as I held it tight in my palm.
Edward clearly heard the sadness in my voice - I saw him frown slightly, even despite the sunglasses covering a large amount of his face, "Are you okay?" he asked me quietly.
I looked up at him in surprise, "Erm, yeah, I'm fine," I managed to stutter out unconvincingly, before attempting to change the subject- "So, why did you decide to come to such an ordinary school like this?" I asked him casually; knowing that Fork's high must seem very boring compared to the schools in Chicago.
Only, it seemed that Edward misinterpreted my question – his expression instantly changed from being warm and friendly, to cold, hard… and almost angry. "You mean a 'normal' school?" he asked quietly, hurt clear in his voice.
"No, that's not what I meant…" I instantly jumped to defend myself, surprised that he honestly thought that I was saying something against his disability, considering the start of our conversation. I cleared my throat, "What I meant was-"
But he cut me off mid-sentence, "I don't want to know," he told me lowly.
I tried to defend myself again, hating that he had got this impression of me. "But, Edward, I-"
But he cut me off again, "Just leave me alone, please?" he asked me quietly, in a voice so broken that I finally realised… he wasn't angry, he was just upset and hurt.
I opened my mouth, intending to tell him that I didn't mean anything against his disability – and that I was only trying to make another lame joke about this boring town. But it seemed that he didn't want to listen… so what was the point of trying? For a couple of fleeting moments back there I actually thought to myself that he could be a friend…
… But clearly this was god's latest way of telling me not to get too close to anyone yet again.
"Fine," I eventually whispered, my voice breaking slightly, as I turned my attention back to my book, the locket still held in one hand as I seeked its comfort once more.
As I read, I could have sworn that I saw Edward open his mouth to say something a couple of times, but it was probably my imagination. If he really wanted to say something I'm sure he would have.
The bell eventually rung and I shot up out of my seat, pretty much running out of the classroom in my haste to be the first to leave.
The rest of the day eventually passed and I repeated my movements from this morning, passing everyone with my head down, ignoring everything around me. Once again the only people who caught my eye was Edward and his friends… I noticed how they all walked in a group, seeming as happy as earlier. Though that wasn't really what got my attention… it was mainly Edward himself. He was being lead by the short pixie-like girl, and his expression didn't match the others at all.
It was what I always saw reflected back at me whenever I looked in the mirror…
Loneliness. Pain. Sadness. Fear.
And it was then that I realised that Edward and I were more alike then I first thought.
And that he needed help just like I did.
… And maybe I could be the one to do just that for him.
I pulled my hood over my head and began the walk down the rain covered streets heading towards my house that I know is still empty. I smiled to myself, going through my new plan in my head – my plan to help Edward… and myself.
Though at the time, as I walked through the rain to the place I hated to call home, I didn't know just how much it would change my life… in more ways then one.
So yeah, hope you like it so far. Don't find it annoying that Edward's blind... I wanted to do something different apart from the normal vampires. This story will show the amazing things what people like him can do despite it all. And like I said... happy ending. ;D
Please review if you like this.
Thanks for reading! Emma.x