New Beginnings

Summary: Spring is normally Sam's favorite time of the year, because of the rebirth it represents. That may all change without the support of his brother. S5 spoilers. Beta by the wonderful Sendintheclowns.

A/N: This story was written for the Sam Love March Madness Prompt of - March is a time to celebrate the Irish and coming spring so what fun or terror is in store for the Winchesters, especially Sam? A link to Summer of Sam Live Journal Site is on my profile page... so go read all the other entries. :0)

This story is dedicated to Bayre for her birthday. Thanks for being such an awesome friend!

A big thanks to Princess_schez for her feedback and wonderful story banner. Oh and another big thanks to dontknowmyname for coming up with the Sam Love idea. It is always fun to have a reason to celebrate Sam!

Sam sat on the park bench soaking in the sun. It had been the first really warm day of spring and so after finishing classes he and Jess decided a picnic in the park was in order. After eating the awesome sandwiches that they picked up at the local deli, Jess had suggested just sitting and enjoying the sunshine. Sam had found it to be a relaxing idea.

They had held hands as they relaxed on the bench, eyes closed, enjoying the sun on their faces and the sounds of spring that surrounded them. Jess loved spring and after spending it together last year, Sam had caught spring fever too.

Sam loved listening to her prattle on about all the new flowers in bloom, she knew every name of every plant. Jess also loved the song birds and could identify most of them.

The last few minutes had been spent on the bench identifying song birds until they fell into a comfortable silence. Sam had almost fallen half way into a sleep state when he felt the tender touch of Jess's hand on his left cheek. Turning to face her he had to blink a moment to adjust his eyes to the sunlight.

"Sam, I wish we could just bottle this moment in time. It seems so perfect." Jess sighed as her hand went back to holding Sam's.

"Yeah, it's pretty wonderful. I never really took time to examine spring time until I met you." Sam replied shyly, his eyes turning to his knees. He could feel a blush across his face.

Jess laughed. "Oh how I love you, my geek boy. Only you would use the words examine spring."

Sam chuckled. "Yeah well, I don't know why you put up with this geek boy, but I'm glad you do."

Jess turned to look at him, her expression serious. "Because it had to be you Sam, always you."

Sam felt his breath leave him for a moment. Something seemed off, the words spoken in love were setting off alarm bells.

"I guess, if you believe in fate and that sort of thing." Sam said in a light tone trying to clear his mind of the dark thoughts trying to form there.

"Yes, I do believe in fate and destiny. I also believe in what spring represents; new beginnings and rebirth. That's what spring is about right, Sam?" Jess had moved closer and wrapping her arms around his left arm.

Sam nodded, still uneasy about the direction of the conversation. He had always believed one chose their path in life, but if Jess believed in destiny what was the harm?

"You do believe in new beginnings, right Sam?" Jess asked earnestly.

That was a question he could answer with a resounding yes. His whole purpose of coming to Stanford had been to start over with a new life away from hunting.

"Yes I do. Stanford is my new beginnings, just like it's yours." Sam replied honestly with a smile.

"No, Stanford was just a little playtime until you were needed." Jess answered seriously.

Sam felt sick to his stomach. The spring time park was wavering around him, and he realized at that moment he was stuck in a dream about the past only this wasn't some innocent dream of his past, this one was being guided by Lucifer. It had been over a month since the dark lord's last visit to him in a dream and he had let his guard down.

"Stop marring her image." Sam screamed as he got off the park bench wishing fervently that he could wake up. It never worked, not while Lucifer had him trapped.

"It's the only way you'll talk to me. In fact, I'm staying as Jess this time, so you'll listen to me." Lucifer stood with his stolen facade and gave Sam a sympathetic smile.

Sam swallowed hard and wanted to run but there was nowhere to hide, nowhere to go. He knew the only way to end the dream was to either say yes to his demands or to at least listen.

"Fine, I'm listening." Sam spat out.

"Good, so we were talking about spring. It is a time of rebirth and new beginnings and it would be like spring for you Sam if you would just say yes. All the heavy burdens you're carrying around would be gone. No more saving the world without thanks or big brothers who don't understand you. You would have me and I would treasure you Sam. I would." Lucifer moved forward as if to touch Sam.

Sam stumbled backwards, eyes wide with fear. "The answer is still no."

"Sam, when are you going to listen to reason?" The beautiful borrowed voice started to sound angry and that made Sam panic.

He began to run, and started a mantra in his head. "No, No, No!"

-0-

Dean sat cleaning guns. He had been asleep but a nasty dream about hell had awoken him and instead of turning to his old friend Jack for some sleep, he opted to be useful with his time. The guns needed cleaning and he did find comfort in the routine of it.

Dean had avoided late night activities like this in the past few months because that left him with too much time to think but lately... well lately things had been better. The world still felt like it was going to hell in a hand basket and that they were just little pawns being moved around but...

But he felt closer to Sam which tended to ground him. They had their so called Team Free Will and while the odds were totally stacked against them, it did make him at least want to fight. To try and be the last, as it were, three standing.

Cas had started to become part of their little inner circle and while he would never be on the level of Bobby, he was a trusted friend just like Pastor Jim had been. In fact in Dean's mind that was the role he had assigned Cas. Their spiritual leader with lots of gray areas, in their corner to the end.

With Bobby sidelined by his injuries and the painful loss of Ellen and Jo it was nice to have another able body who did have some cool powers.

Dean was just about finished with his task at hand when Sam started to stir on the other bed. It had been his hope that Sam would at least get some sleep tonight but it was beginning to look otherwise by the movements and sounds Sam was making.

Crap. Sam hadn't had any horrendous nightmares in weeks but it looked like Sam was making up for lost time.

The kid was thrashing in bed, yelling No in a terrified voice. Moving quickly, Dean first grabbed both of Sam's wrists so that the kid couldn't give him a shiner and then began to gently shake Sam, calling out his name. When that didn't work his movements became stronger and he found himself yelling his brother's name.

Sam's eyes finally flew open and the look of terror there tore at Dean's heart. It took a moment for Sam to finally realize that he was safe before he seemed to relax and it was then that Dean released his grip.

Dean tried to catch his breath as he spoke. "You okay?"

"Gonna be sick," was groaned out as Sam leaped from the bed and headed to the bathroom.

Dean moved towards the bathroom door warring with the urge to go in and rub his brother's back. He knew that Sam preferred privacy so he just stayed close willing his little brother to realize he was there for him.

Once the retching stopped and Dean could hear the water running from the bathroom sink, he moved to sit on Sam's bed.

Sam soon reappeared and quirked an eyebrow at Dean.

"My bed's kind of full at the moment Sam." Dean replied with a reassuring smile.

Sam nodded and moved to sit down next to Dean. The kid remained quiet though.

"Wanna talk about it?" Dean asked testing the waters.

"Not really but considering Lucifer paid me another visit I guess I should." Sam replied in a quiet voice.

"Son-of-a-bitch! What was his demented mind game this time?" Dean grunted out in anger. He moved closer to Sam so that his shoulder was touching his brother's in a show of support.

Sam sighed. "Spring time was the lesson today. He took on Jess's form because she loved spring, taught me to love spring. Spring with the beautiful rebirth of the plants and its show of new life. It was a great time for a rebirth or new start."

Dean huffed. "So Lord of the Hell Fire Dance, wanted you to what embrace the idea of a new start with him right? Cause that would be oh so lovely, but instead of the spring time song of birds it would be screams of pain and suffering."

Sam smirked. "Lord of the Hell Fire Dance?"

Dean smirked back. "Stupid PBS was showing that Lord of the Dance dude last night."

Sam nodded. "It's just so frustrating. Our lives...."

Dean finished for him. "Our lives suck out loud for the most part, and it would be so easy to just say yes. I get that Sam, I do but we can't. As long as we have our little team free will, I'm not giving up. Not on our fight or you."

Sam smiled. "Yeah, me too."

Dean knocked his shoulder gently against Sam's and spoke. "And as I see it, we have been reborn, both of us have died and come back. This is our rebirth and our new beginning and while it kind of sucks, as long as we're together I have hope."

Sam rested his body closer to Dean. "Me too Dean me too."

Dean nodded. Holding onto hope when you felt so empty inside was really hard but he meant what he had said to Sam as long as they were together, he would cling to what little hope was left. It was all they had, so it had to be enough.

End

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