Okay, so I was really frustrated after watching Chuck last night. I'm getting angry that Sarah's character keeps having these breakthrough Sarah moments with Shaw, whom in my opinion she has absolutely no chemistry with, instead of having them with Chuck like she should be. Anyway, enough ranting about that.

I kind of like this whole idea of Sarah thinking Chuck has actually killed someone when he in fact has not. On top of that Chuck needing to lie to her about it, in order to protect both her and Casey. This Story is going to pick up from where "Chuck vs. The Final Exam" left off.

So I probably shouldn't be taking on another story right now, but I kind of want to see where I go with this, hope you do to. Enjoy.

Spies, Secrets and Lies

Chapter 1

The gun felt heavy in his hand. He should have been used to the weight by now, the feel of his finger resting on the trigger, ready to pull back. Chuck tossed the gun down on the table and stared at his hands. Were they capable of taking the life of another? As far as his team was concerned, as far as Beckman was concerned, he had passed his red test with flying colors. He was a killer. He had pulled the trigger, inevitably ending the life of Hunter Perry. Everything was different now. There was no going back. Chuck was a spy.

A knock at the door roused Chuck from his thoughts. He had been waiting to hear back from Sarah. Surely she would come see him when she heard what had happened, when she got his messages.

"Oh, thank God Sarah." He said aloud as he made his way to the door.

Chuck grabbed hold of the doorknob, and swung it open expecting to find Sarah on the other side.

"Sarah…" He started only to discover it was not Sarah on the other side of the door. Instead he was greeted by an unfamiliar face. That of a female agent.

"Good evening Agent Bartowski. Your flight to Washington leaves in an hour. I'm here to take you to the airport. Are you ready?"

Chuck stood before her dumbfounded, everything was happening so fast.

"An hour?" He managed to get out.

"Yes Agent Bartowski. We must leave immediately." She replied.

"But..But I…" He wasn't ready for this. He needed to talk to Sarah. Why the hell wasn't she calling him back. "I'm not packed." he finally said.

The female agent looked at her watch. "I can give you five minutes." She said before turning her attention back to him.

Chuck swallowed hard. It wasn't much time, but he would take it. 'Thank you." he said. "I'll be quick. Please come in… have a seat." Chuck gestured for her to take a seat on the couch as he made his way back to his bedroom. He no sooner got in his room, closing the door behind him and he had already hit the speed dial on his phone.

"Come on Sarah pick up." Chuck paced the room as the phone rang and rang but she didn't answer. Why wasn't she answering. Surely she had heard by now what had happened tonight. Chuck sighed when the phone finally went to Sarah's voicemail again.

"Sarah!.." he sounded frantic. "Look, I really need to talk to you…there's an agent here to take me to the airport….They're taking me to Washington tonight. I'm leaving in an hour….Sarah….I just" His voice softened. "Sarah…I need you….Please… call me back."

Chuck closed his phone and made his way over to his closet. Opening the door, he removed his big black duffle bag. He tossed the bag down on his bed and went to work pulling random items out of his drawers and tossing then into the bag.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Agent Shaw asked as she escorted him to her door.

"Yeah." She lied. "I think I'm going to call it a night." She finished.

"I can stay if you like."

"No." She responded, maybe a little too quickly for Shaw's liking. Sarah could tell by his expression that he was definitely surprised and perhaps even a little hurt by her quick response. "I'm just really tired…I think i need some time to myself."

Shaw nodded as he opened the door. "Goodnight Sarah." He said making his way out the door.

"Goodnight." She closed the door behind him. She leaned against it, taking a brief moment for herself. That moment was short lived when her cell phone rang from across the room. Sarah rushed to grab the device that was laying on her bed. Sarah glanced at the screen on her phone. This was the third time in the past ten minutes the thing had gone off. She was not surprised when she was greeted by the beautiful image of one Chuck Bartowski. Sarah's finger hovered momentarily over the ignore button before she finally pushed it. She couldn't deal with Chuck right now. She didn't know him anymore and the worst part was it was all her fault. She never thought he would be capable of taking another's life, but thanks to her, that's exactly what he did. She had turned him into a killer.

The tears welled in her eyes once again. Why did this have to be so hard? Chuck was just doing his job. She never thought twice about Bryce taking a life, nor would she had it been Shaw. It's what they did, it was part of the job, But they weren't Chuck. He wasn't that guy, it just wasn't in his nature, that's what attracted her to him. His innocence, his ability to find the good in everyone, to always do the right thing. The government had robbed him of that and she had played a big part in it. She blamed herself.

Sarah's phone beeped, indicating she had voice mail. She glanced at the screen on her phone once again. She had three new messages. Sarah wiped at her eyes and called her voice mail. She punched in her password and waited patiently for the new messages to play.

"Hey Sarah it's me."

He sounded troubled and why wouldn't he? Sarah knew exactly how he must be feeling. Like she had told Shaw moments ago, the day she took her red test was the worst day of her life.

"Please call me back Sarah, I really need to talk to you."

Sarah erased the message and waited for the next one to play.

"Sarah. Look I don't know where you are or why you haven't called me back, but I really need to see you or talk to you. Call me… Please."

He sounded desperate and she hated it. It brought up too many horrible memories. Memories she thought she had put behind her. Your first kill is never easy and not something you ever forget. She wanted to comfort him, tell him it was going to be okay, that he would recover from this, but knowing Chuck, she wasn't so sure he would. After being prompted to do so, Sarah deleted the message and waited for the final message to play.

"Sarah!.." he sounded frantic. "Look, I really need to talk to you…there's an agent here to take me to the airport….They're taking me to Washington tonight. I'm leaving in an hour….Sarah….I just" His voice softened. "Sarah…I need you….Please… call me back."

"Oh my God Chuck." They were moving him tonight. Sarah looked at her watch. The last message from Chuck was from nearly 15 minutes ago, which meant that in 45 minutes Chuck would be airborne. He would be on his way to D.C to finalize everything with the General before leaving for Rome.

Without hesitation Sarah grabbed her coat and her keys and flew out the door.

Chuck sat silently in the airport near his gate waiting for his plane to board. The female agent accompanying him sat directly across from him.

"I heard you passed your test with flying colors." She said breaking the silence.

"Huh?' he looked up at her. "Oh, yeah. Flying colors." Those were her words not his. Of course he knew the truth. Him and his former handler Colonel John Casey. It would be their secret. He had no other choice. If he told the truth, It would be the end for Casey. He was a civilian now and what he had done was nothing short of murder. He didn't have a title to hide behind anymore, it would be the end for him. To make matters even worse, it would be the end for any chance Chuck had of ever being with Sarah. He would go back to being just plain old Chuck Bartowski, nerd hearder extraordinaire of the Burbank Buy More. How could he ever be expected to go back to that after all he had seen, after all he had done. It wasn't fair.

"Flight 1263 to Washington D.C is now boarding at gate 12." the announcement came from the intercom.

"Well that's us." The agent announced as she stood up.

Chuck looked up at her as she stood in front of him, waiting for him to gather his belongings.

"You coming?" she asked.


Chuck stood up and grabbed his carry on bag. He slung the strap over his shoulder and removed his boarding pass from his pocket. He proceeded to follow the agent as they headed towards gate 12.

Once in line, it moved quickly. Everything seemed to be moving quickly Chuck thought to himself. Chuck pulled his phone out of his pocket and looked at the screen. No missed calls, no messages. Sarah never called. The look of disappointment on Chuck's face was abundant and didn't go unnoticed.

"Everything okay Agent Bartowski?" His companion questioned.

Chuck tucked the phone back in his pocket. "Everything's fine." he said. "Just anxious to get to D.C. I guess."

The wheels of her Porsche screeched as she sped up to the loading zone at LAX. Sarah jumped out and headed for the door.

"Lady you can't park there!" A security guard yelled to her.

Sarah whipped out her badge and flashed it. The guard immediately stood down and let her pass through the doors. Sarah had made some calls on the way to the airport and discovered that Chuck was supposed to be on flight 1263. A direct flight from L.A to D.C. Sarah checked the outgoing flights and discovered that Chuck's plane was leaving from gate 12. She ran as quickly as she could, flashing her badge to bypass security. Sarah slowed down as she approached gate 12. She looked around searching frantically for him. Finally she spotted him in line.

"Chuck!" She called out to him. Her voice caught in her throat making it barely audible. She watched as he advanced in the line. Every second that went by she was a second closer to losing him.

She had to stop him. "Chuck!" She tried again. This time her voice loud and clear.

Chuck was getting ready to hand over his boarding pass when he heard it. His mind must be playing tricks on him he concluded and proceeded forward.


He heard it again. Chuck looked around and then his eyes met hers.

"Sarah?" He didn't know if she was real or not. He watched as she headed towards him.

"Chuck wait!" She called to him.


"Agent Bartowski? The plane is boarding." The fellow agent reminded him as he veered from the line to meet up with Sarah.

"I'll just be a minute." He assured her as he stepped out of line. She followed suit and moved aside as she waited for him to return.

"Chuck." She panted, obviously out of breath from her long sprint through LAX.

"Sarah. You came." he reached out for her hands taking them into his own.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

He smiled at her. "I am now."

"I'm sorry Chuck…I didn't know they were going to give you your red test tonight…I…forgive me?" she pleaded with him.

"Forgive you?" He was confused. What did he possible have to forgive her for?

"If it wasn't for me, you never would have killed him Chuck…I turned you into this…" She looked down, she couldn't stand to look him in the eyes.

"Sarah…no.. you don't understand…"

"No, Chuck, you don't understand. It's because of me that Hunter Perry's blood is on your hands. I remember what it's like, the first kill. I'm so sorry." She cried.

"Sarah, stop." He wanted to tell her so badly. He wasn't a killer. He was still that man she asked to run away with her months prior. The man she was ready to give everything up for. "It's not what you think." he continued.

"Chuck you don't have to explain. You were doing your job."

"Sarah no….I didn't.."

"What?" She asked.

"Nothing." He looked down to the ground. He didn't want to lie to her but what choice did he have. This wasn't the time. There were too many people around.

When she had entered the airport, the only thing on her agenda was stopping him. She told herself she would do whatever it took to keep him there. She didn't want to lose him. It wasn't until now that she began to realize that she already had. Her Chuck was gone.

"Final call for flight 1263 to Washington D.C." The announcement came over the intercom.

"Bartowski, we need to leave now." His traveling companion approached him.

"Yeah. I'll be right there." He motioned to her.

"You better go. You don't want to miss your flight." Sarah said.

"I don't?" he asked.


"Sarah, we never finished our conversation from the stakeout the other night."

"I know." she replied averting his eyes.

"I'm a real spy now Sarah. This is what we've been waiting for. This is a good thing for us…right?"

Sarah didn't answer. She didn't know what to say.


"Bartowski now!" The agent barked at him as she tugged on his arm.

Chuck never broke his gaze with Sarah who refused to look up at him. It was too hard for her.

"Goodbye Chuck." was the last words he heard from her as the agent escorted him away through the gate. Sarah's eyes remained fixated on the ground. She couldn't bare to look at him.

Okay so I know a lot of you may not be happy with that ending for the chapter, but just let it play out. I would love to hear your feedback on this. Should I continue?