Hey all, this is the first story I am posting on Fanfic and hopefully the updates with be fairly regular as I already have 17 chapters written. Hopefully everyone will give the story a chance and also enjoy it. Please let me know what you think as it means a lot to me. Hugs, Ember
No Brother of Mine
There are some things in life where no matter how hard a person tries, they just can't fix or take back. There are no do overs. No I really didn't mean its. What's done is done, and you must move on and try to rebuild from there. But even with that knowledge in the back of Sam Winchester's mind, he still tapped away at his computer keyboard searching for some way to get back the last two weeks of his life.
It had been two weeks since Dean disappeared. Two very long weeks. No one just disappears without a trace as if they never existed – but Dean did. Bobby, who had practically raised them both, had never even heard of him, and thought Sam was either going off the deep end or had been on a drunken bender when he'd called the older hunter to ask if he'd heard anything from Dean.
Sometimes I really wish you weren't my brother. Raking a hand through his hair in frustration, Sam pressed his eyes closed as he thought back to the last words he had spoken to his older brother.
Yeah, well join the club, Sammy, cuz that's exactly the way I feel about you, too. Dean had stormed off after uttering those words, and more than likely had gone out to some bar to get drunk. He did return to the motel later that evening. Sam had heard him shuffling around in his duffel bag for clean clothes, and had heard the bathroom door shut along with the water turning on. But in the morning he was gone. The room cleared out of everything that belonged to him. The only thing remaining was the Impala.
He should have said something. He should have told Dean he didn't mean what he had said, but he just laid there pretending to sleep. Both of their tempers had been flaring from the moment they had returned from saving their mom and dad in the past. Although they had managed to save their parents from Anna, what good did it do as they still died eventually – the Yellow-Eyed demon still came into Sam's nursery and killed their mother, and their father still made a deal with the demon to save Dean's life. Michael had made certain of that when he erased both of their memories of the entire incident.
With a heavy sigh, Sam pried his eyelids open, and jumped, startled at the sight of Castiel. The fallen angel always had the nerve racking ability to appear out of nowhere at the least expected moment. The angel's lips were drawn downward in a frown, and as always there was the same inquisitive searching quality in his clear blue eyes. As usual, he wore the same blue suit with a matching blue tie that he had loosened until it hung low, which always made Sam wonder why he hadn't taken the damn thing off if it bothered him so much. His tan trench coat was as rumpled as ever, which all in all by picture book and church depictions, made him very unimpressive looking as far as angels went.
"You find anything out, Cas?" Sam asked as he pushed back his seat and rose to stand.
After a brief pause, Castiel gave a curt nod. "Yes, but you're not going to like it, Sam."
Sam braced his hands against the back of his chair, preparing himself for the worst. His stomach twisted in knots as silence filled the room, knowing if Castiel was hesitant to explain where Dean was, it had to be pretty damn bad. Swallowing hard against the thick lump that had formed in his throat, he uttered, "Where's my brother?"
For several more unbearably long moments, Castiel remained quiet, and then he turned his back on Sam. "Your brother – the man you know as Dean Winchester ceased to exist . . . Lucifer granted your wish – and Micheal allowed for it to happen."
Mouth dropping wide open, Sam's knees buckled and if it hadn't been for the chair he was holding firmly onto, he would have collapsed into a heap on the floor. "Th-they killed him?" he stammered, his mind reeling at the idea of an angel and demon taking Dean's life. "They killed my brother?"
"No," Castiel shook his head, and turned back to look at Sam, but couldn't quite manage to meet his gaze. "You can not kill what doesn't exist, Sam – the Dean you knew was never born."
"No, that's not possible." Sam searched his mind for a way to refute what Castiel had told him, and quickly lit on the most obvious reason of all. "Someone's lying to you, Cas, because if he never existed, he couldn't have possibly broken the first seal, which means Lucifer wouldn't be walking free right now."
Castiel lowered his head. "Someone else broke the first seal."
"My father," Sam breathed, and with that knowledge his legs gave out him, and he crumble to the ground. With tears blurring his vision, he looked up at the angel. "He traded his soul for me instead of Dean, didn't he?"
Ignoring Sam's question, Castiel said, "It wasn't a perfect plan, Sam," and then taking a step forward, he took hold of Sam's arm and helped him to his feet. "There were . . . wrinkles – things that can not be changed. The Apocalypse still is at hand . . . and Dean, he is still Michael's vessel."
"I don't understand." Shaking his head in confusion, Sam narrowed his eyes on the angel. "If my brother no longer exists, how could he still be Michael's meatsuit?"
"It is complicated." Brow furrowing, the angel pursed his lips. "Before they erased his history, they plucked his soul from him, and then Micheal went back through time, and placed it into an unborn child."
"You're talking about reincarnation?" Sam dropped down onto the chair, fearing if he didn't sit down, he would be on the floor again in any given moment. "My brother is someone else now?"
"So how do I get him back?"
"You can't. What's done is done and can not be changed."
"There has to be way," Sam's voice rose several octaves as he glared at the angel. "Take me back to the night before Dean disappeared, and I can make things right."
"I'm sorry, Sam, but I can't." With a weary sigh, Castiel pulled out a chair, and took a seat beside Sam. "I've already tried, and I just could not make it there to stop you from saying you wished you weren't brothers with Dean."
"Then we'll find another way . . . there has to be something we can do to fix this."
"I wish there was, but I have tried everything I could think of. Dean is gone."
"No, he's not gone!" Sam gripped hold of the edges of the table, and with anger driving him, he heaved it as hard as he could, sending it toppling to the floor. His computer along with several partially full cups of coffee crashed to the ground. On his feet in an instant, he fisted his hands in Castiel's trench coat, and dragged him to his feet. "If his soul still exists, then my brother is alive! So you better damn well tell me where he is!"
His threat was met with momentary silence, and then as he finally spoke, the angel grasped hold of both of Sam's hands, and pried then from his jacket. "His name is Drake Marlowe. He's lived twenty-one of your earth years, and the place he calls home is in Naples, New York."
Upon hearing where Dean was living, Sam strode from where he was standing, grabbed his duffel and began stuffing his belongings in the bag. Within a matter of five minutes, he'd packed everything, and had double-checked to make sure there was nothing belonging to Dean that he might have overlooked before now. His lips curled downward in a frown as he realized they had taken every single thing his brother had owned, only leaving Sam with his memory.
"Are you coming with me?" he asked as he hefted his duffel over his shoulder and headed toward the door.
"I would like to, but at the moment, I can not," the angel responded evasively, leading Sam to believe Michael was somehow the reason why Castiel could not come with him.
"Cas, you're the only one I've got," Sam said, hazel eyes pleading with the angel to reconsider, "I can't do this on my own, so you can't let them stop you from helping me."
"I can make you no promises, but I will do what I can."
"Fine, but if in the time while you're doing whatever it is you do, Michael somehow gets this new Dean to say yes to him, I'll be coming after you." With that said, Sam flung open the door, and stormed from the room.