Disclaimer- I don't own Twilight.

Okay, so I was feeling all sad and depressed one day so I wrote this, and later, I went through my zillions of un-posted work and decided what the hell, let's see if people like it.

So I'm seeing if people like it.


Once the danger becomes evident, you're too far in to get yourself out.

For me at least. Or those like me, who didn't know how to get out.

I winced as I pressed the cold compress to my side and tried not to move too much, I knew that it wasn't the only place he kicked or punched.

I took a slow, deep, methodical breath, careful not to put too much pressure on any part of my body. I had grown accustomed to this, to the care I'd have to take to handle myself after our little 'sessions'.

I tried to sing a song in my head, a happy one, to block out the memory of what had just come so fresh this afternoon.

But there was no thought, no amount of pain killers, and no amount of slow, methodical breaths that could keep it away or the tears at bay.

Flashback of this afternoon

What would he like… what would he like… maybe! No… I made that yesterday… what about- no, we don't have any of that…

I sighed as I mentally went through all of the things that I could possibly make Charlie for dinner.

He had spaghetti for dinner yesterday and pretty much all of last week, I knew he must be getting sick of it… if we had any chicken I could make some chicken salad, but it was all moldy.

I would go out and get some but the food money, and all the money is with him in his wallet, and God knows just how much I don't want to ask him for some.

I hung my head against the cabinet and sighed, what was I going to make? I knew that if I didn't make anything, he'd be more than pissed off.

I was so caught up in my mental babbling that I hadn't heard Charlie drag himself down the stairs. I immediately stiffened.

My breath stayed locked in a lump in my throat and I felt my whole being freeze into stone.

I turned my head down and to the right, awaiting his commanding and torturous presence to be heard and felt in the kitchen.

"You little bitch! How dare you forget about my dinner like this!"

My voice was shaky as I swallowed the lump and tried to answer him, "I-I didn't, you don't like to eat dinner until 5 and-"

I was cut off by a sharp slap to my face. I gasped as I felt a warm, salty liquid start to trickle into my mouth. I had to blink back the tears that threatened to spill from my eyes.

I automatically raised my hand to my face to assess the damage, and pulled it away to see the tip of my finger a dark red. My eyes rolled back a little and I felt a bit faint at the sight and smell of my blood.

He continued to glare at me with cold, dark eyes and he raised an eyebrow.

"Answer me, you piece of shit!" he yelled out and the tight and firm tone of his voice brought me back to reality, and made me realize that this was only just starting.

I smelled the stench of alcohol in his breath.

"I-I didn't forge-" and before I got a chance to finish my sentence, I felt his rough, calloused hands give me a strong and heavy blow in my midsection.

Once I was down I gulped for air, but all I was met with was the taste of some of my blood and I choked on it.

With teary, blurred eyes, I looked up at him; he laughed sardonically above me and kicked me straight on my arm, completely visible when a bruise showed up. I cradled my arm close to my chest, waiting for more.

End flashback-

I bit my lip lightly as I used the compress as a stress ball, forgetting about how much the pressure would hurt me.

I snapped my eyes closed and lightened the pressure a little bit. I glanced at my arm, noticing the light outline of a bruise that would no doubt be a stormy mixture of black and blue tomorrow.

I sighed; I was going to have to use more cover up on that than the other bruises. Lucky for me, and note the sarcasm, that tomorrow was a Monday.

That meant that there was school. That wasn't a good thing.

I pushed the melting ice cube around in my mouth; I noted that the slightly bloody spot was now too numb to bleed anymore.

I pushed the cup of ice away from me; my mouth was too numb for more.

I lifted up the compress from my side, yeah, that was going to bruise, but a shirt would cover that up, no problem.

It was now 8 o clock, after I made Charlie a TV dinner and I didn't have to see him for the rest of the night, and most of the day tomorrow.

I had finished my homework a while ago and now I had nothing else to do but focus on the pain that was coursing through my body.

Tomorrow would be better, I tried to convince myself, I mean, school wasn't as bad as this was.

Home life was… well, for lack of better words, hell. It was hell. It was fire all around me. I had to dodge the lava and get to the other side, but that never worked, because the fire and lava was endless. But it was too late to get back to the beginning to get my way out. It was darkness, a darkness that swallowed my happy past with my mom… the mom that had died of breast cancer and forced me to come live with my alcoholic dad.

I grimaced, pushing thoughts of my mom away; that was a touchy subject for me.

School wasn't as bad. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't enjoyable, but I would always prefer it to being… home.

It wasn't unenjoyable because of the academics, which was my favorite part. Immersing myself in school work was really one of the only things that distracted me from life in general.

My teachers were amazingly nice to me, I relished in the nice way they seemed to treat me.

But, there is an extra 2 hours in school left unprotected by teachers. And I guess I give off a vibe that renders me an easy target, because Edward Cullen took advantage of those very same hours to put me on the forefront of his mind, and no, that wasn't a good thing because he didn't treat me well.

Edward Cullen was popular. Edward Cullen was a quarter back. Edward Cullen had a dazzlingly white and straight smile. Edward Cullen had a 4.0. Edward Cullen was voted most likely to succeed/most likely to become a billionaire/most likely to have a full head of hair forever/most likely to be good looking forever/ etc.

I, myself, voted him most likely to bring Bella Swan's confidence down an extra -1,000 points by the end of our junior year.

See, Edward Cullen had these mesmerizing liquid green eyes, this pale, clear skin, this perfect body, those perfect cheekbones, that perfect bronze hair… and that perfect everything.

He was every girls' desire, and sorry to say, mine too.

You know, he was all around perfect. He didn't have a girlfriend though; I think he thought that he was above every other girl in Forks. Which was probably true…

He didn't feel the same way about me though, to him, I was just the regular, ugly girl you'd see every day. He liked to point that out a lot.

But I almost welcomed everything he did to me, because nothing, nothing Edward Cullen ever did would match up to anything Charlie did.

But that didn't make it fun. And it's not like I could tell anybody and make it all better like you'd see in the movies.

Edward Cullen had the whole school backing him up; in fact, they'd crowd around him at every chance to see him do something new and 'funny' to Bella.

Sometimes, some of the other kids would participate too, trip me in the halls, and call me a name… stuff like that.

Edward didn't ever do anything physical though, he never shoved me, and I was somewhat grateful for that. He seemed to know when it got to be too much and said something like, 'you aren't even worth my time', and left, rolling his eyes and earning high fives as he strutted down the hall with the football team and his groupies behind him.

Or maybe that was wishful thinking, maybe he didn't care whether or not he went too far… yeah, he told me a lot that he didn't care whether I lived or died. He wouldn't care.

And Charlie? Escaping him? Funny. Charlie was the chief of police in Forks, calling the police would do nothing, he practically ran the station.

And I didn't have any neighbors; we lived in a secluded area, which scared me into secrecy more than anything else. Charlie could come and… hurt me any time he wanted, and no one would ever hear me.

I was too far in to escape. The lava was surrounding me.

I sighed and rolled over, minding my new injuries as I flipped the light off and tried to lull myself to sleep with thoughts of a happier life.


I woke up with a jolt that Monday morning. I hit the top of my alarm clock with unnecessary force and threw the covers off of me.

After I brushed my teeth and washed my face, I lazily walked to my closet and tried to get out a long sleeved shirt to cover up the black and blue bruise that, surely enough, now adorned my arm with a demanding presence, but it was one of those rare, sunny days in Forks and I would be forced to wear a short sleeved shirt as not to arouse suspicion. I would just use more cover up.

I threw on a pair of jeans and my chucks and threw my plain, long brown hair into a pony tail.

My ugly, as Edward called them; murky brown eyes assessed my appearance in the mirror. I caked on as much cover up on my arm as possible to cover up the bruise without making it look too unnatural. I put on enough, but if you looked hard enough you could vaguely see it.

I looked at the corner of my mouth, my ugly mouth which had too full lips as Edward called them, and saw that they were even more swollen from the slap, making them look unnaturally large. Edward would have a field day with that today.

I sighed and grabbed my backpack, this was as good as it was going to get.

I ran downstairs, thankful that Charlie had already left, but I saw a note from him on the counter.


I'm working a double shift tonight so you're on your own for dinner. I'm sorry about what happened yesterday,


Your dad.

I sighed… he was so nice sometimes… see? He didn't really mean it…

I grabbed the keys to my beloved and rusty old red truck and headed out the door, making sure to lock it.

When I got to school, 5 minutes early, not accounting for the lack of traffic, I parked in my usual spot. My spot was about 100 feet from the entrance, but it would do me some good to walk, Edward said I was gaining too much weight, I was nearing 113 pounds.

It was silly how much his opinion mattered to me because I could never live up to what was no doubt, in his mind, the perfect girl. He hadn't found her in Forks, because the eligible Edward Cullen had been single for the two years that I'd known him.

I hurried to my first period class, hoping to avoid Edward but at the same time, wishing to run into him.

I obviously got the wish granted and denied at the same time.

"Hey!" his velvet voice called to me, "Swan!" I slowed, knowing that if I didn't I would be forcibly turned around by his fellow jocks, and that would be even more embarrassing.

I turned around and looked up at him with wide eyes. Even after all he'd done to me; I still had butterflies every time I looked at him.

His eyes glanced down at me lips, and his brow furrowed a bit, and I thought I saw a slight frown on his perfect lips, but it was probably just a trick of the light since he smiled cockily a few moments later.

"What, Swan," he never called me Bella, only Swan, "you run into a wall with those fat lips you have?"

I looked down at my shoes and I heard chuckles erupt from the crowd behind him; I looked down and to the right.

"No answer?"

I heard the smirk in his voice and I sunk further into myself, I chanced a look back up at him and instantly regretted it.

He was looking down at me and was about to say something else but was cut off by the bell, alerting us that class stared soon.

He winked at me, and the act confused me, no one was able to see it so what was it for… maybe it was just something that he did, "See you at lunch, Swan."

And I turned around and sped off to my favorite class, English, and gave a sigh of relief. Luckily, and this was the only thing lucky in my sorry life, I didn't have any of my classes with Edward.

But that was bitter sweet, because I always longed to see his face, but not the things that came from his mouth, no matter how amazing his voice sounded.

In the midst of all this hell, Edward Cullen made my life a bit better, until he opened his mouth.

Other than that, I counted on school to make me happy.


2nd and 3rd period came and went too fast, and lunch was soon approaching.

When the bell rang, I frowned and gathered my things slowly.

"Ms. Swan, is something wrong?" Ms. Goff's voice was somewhat soothing, her gentle attitude just managed to make it better.

I smiled slightly and put my last book in my bag.

"Yeah, Ms. Goff, I'll be okay, thanks."

She looked unsure of my response, but nodded anyways and continued on grading her papers as I scurried out of class and to the lunch room.

I sat in the back of the room, per usual, trying to keep a low profile. I sat my backpack down and pulled out my sandwich, ready to eat and read Wuthering Heights in peace.

I peeked over Lockwood's latest diary entry to Edward's tables. Yes, tables. He even had the lunch ladies tied around his little fingers. He had them arrange the tables just for him every day to line up 6 in a row so the whole school could sit with him.

That was excluding me, the geeks, and the emo's.

The only difference was that I sat alone. Edward glanced up to where he knew I would be situated and I bit down on my turkey sandwich nervously, pretending to be totally absorbed in Heathcliff's need for revenge against Edgar Linton.

I heard Edward's familiar footsteps, accompanied by many others, approaching.

I scooted my legs closer to my chest and buried my head in my book further. I didn't look up when the footsteps stopped. I heard the familiar murmurs erupt in the crowd behind him.

I felt it being tugged from my fingers and my eyes widened, I looked up to see it in Edward's long fingered hands.

He stared down at the cover, and something came across in his eyes, but a second later it was gone and he smirked again, quirking an eyebrow and holding it by his face, as if to say 'really? You're reading this?'

He leaned some of his weight on his right foot and pursed his lips, seeming to be annoyed with something.

My mouth was wide open; you could mess with anything else about me… but my books I held close to my heart.

Edward saw the look on my face and smirked, causing his minions to laugh along with him.

I bit my swollen lip and blinked back angry tears. He carelessly tossed the book back at me.

"Bronte? Hmm, Swan, if I didn't know better I'd say that you need to get a new book collection."

My eyes tightened, "What do you want, Edward."

He quirked a cocky eyebrow at me, "I want…" he looked at the sticky soda I had on the table in front of me. He thought about something for a moment and he blinked. His gaze shifted to my bag and the full water bottle I had inside.

After thinking for a moment about whatever he was thinking about, he reached for the water and unscrewed the cap.

I gaped at him, he never resorted to anything physical, and I thought I could always count on that with him. The look on my face must have betrayed my hopeless emotion, but he didn't linger on it, and if he did see it, then he chose to ignore it.

Instead, he plastered a smile on his face, looked to his buddies, and poured it all over me. The ice in the water shocked me, and my eyes flew open. I wiped the water off of my face with my arms, but winced when I realized that this was where my bruise was.

I cradled that arm against my chest. I couldn't tell the difference between my tears and the dripping water.

I heard laughs coming from all around me and my eyes prickled with tears as I looked up at Edward.

He looked confused as he looked at my arm, huh? That didn't make sense… I looked down to see my huge, black and blue bruise, it had grown about 2 inches and it was darker than what I was normally used to, he had used more force.

I gasped and tried to twist my arm so that it was hidden from his view.

He looked up at my watery eyes questioningly, but didn't say anything. He looked at my too full lips again, swollen from Charlie's slap, and something flashed in his eyes.

Oh my… okay, so I'm sure you have questions about Edward's behavior. Or Bella's. I know I made them a bit confusing.

I answer every review so ask me a question. Tell me if you liked it… what you didn't like, etc.


Wow, I just loved this chapter. I was blown away by it. I love this and I got to say Jess you. Are. Amazing. Thanks!



Should I continue?