Title: Cupid's Got Me
Summary: Cody absolutely hates Valentine's Day but has a secret admirer. He looks everywhere but the obvious.
Disclaimer: not mine
Author's notes: Obviously wrote this in February. It was posted on LJ but the Wrestling world on fanfictionnet needs more SLASH.
He hated Valentine's Day. He felt that it was nothing but a commercial holiday that exploited a person's wallet. Because, seriously, shouldn't a person tell the ones they cared about everyday that they loved them and not just once a year? And if you didn't have the balls to do it during the year to confess your secret love to your crush that it made you a coward to do so on February 14th? And how many cheaters had used it for an excuse to lavish their spouses with gifts in hopes of making amends for their wondering ways? He blamed it all on kindergarten and bringing in those dumb cards for the other little kids.
"Whoa! What are you frownin' for, Baby-boy? You're face is gonna be stuck that way."
"Shut-up, Ted," Cody scowled, swatting Ted's hand from his face. "Just, seein' all that crap, UGH!" He pointed at the pink, red, and white merchandise in the store window, the two of them walking down a busy street in Raleigh, avoiding bundled up locals. "They have Randy Orton themed Valentine's Day scarves! Like the Christmas ones only red and white." Cody shuddered, wandering how Randy had even allowed them to make such a disgusting thing. "And it's even worse that they're selling like fuckin' crazy."
Ted laughed, slinging a companionable arm across Cody's broad shoulders, "Women love us, Codes. Come on, you don't really think girls care about wrestling. They just wanna see us in our spankies," Ted teased at Cody's affronted expression.
"They're not spankies! They're dignified and respectable wrestling trunks. They're not under any circumstances what cheerleader's wear underneath their skirts!" Cody's scowl deepened if it was possible. "So there!"
"You know, you look like a pissed off cat. No, you're not even a cat. You're a kitten." Ted avoided Cody's fist flying at his jaw. "I can see it now. The little ears, the tail. Yeah, you'd make a good cat-boy."
"A cat-boy?! What the Hell? You don't even like manga and besides, cat-boys are generally in yaoi anime and I know you don't watch that."
"Yaoi?" Ted echoed, pausing at a coffee shop, "Come on, I need the caffeine."
"Fine but I want hot chocolate and it better be white chocolate," Cody grumbled, crossing his arms in front of his chest as they went inside. "And yaoi means boy on boy action. Like, gay. And the only reason I know is because I happened to come across at Barnes and Noble."
"Suuure, Cody, whatever you say," Ted grinned, walking up to the register. "Can I get a coffee, black. And make it the biggest ya got," he smiled charmingly at the woman behind the counter, "And my buddy'll have a white chocolate hot chocolate. He's so demanding," Ted rolled his eyes, the girl giggling and blushing before she went off to make the orders.
"I'm not demanding," Cody elbowed him in the ribs, "I just know what I like."
Ted grabbed a pink tiger and pressed its paw, crappy love music filling the shop as the stuffed animal danced, "Isn't this cute? It kinda reminds me of you," he winked cheerfully at the fuming Cody.
"I don't want any of that crap and I swear to God, if I even get one damn card I'm gonna go ballistic and kill everyone. This is the most pointless holiday and fuck, Saint Valentine's wasn't even a real saint! See, that proves that it was created for the sole purpose of taking our money."
"Wow, dramatic much?" Ted shook his head, thanking the girl and giving her a ten, "Why do you hate it so much? I mean, it's a day to spoil the ones you love, to let them know you care."
"But why? Why just one day when you're supposed to be doing it every day?"
"That's kinda depressin'," Ted remarked, taking a sip of his coffee, the two of them returning to the sidewalk that would lead them to the hotel they were staying in for a few days. "You don't let anyone spoil you?"
"I get enough of that on my birthday and Christmas."
"So you're sayin' if you got a box of those delicious caramel candies that you salivate over every time Randy has a box, you wouldn't take 'em?"
It took Cody a few seconds to answer, contemplating. Yeah, the candies were delicious but- "Nope. Because that's giving in."
"How have you managed to keep a girlfriend past Valentine's Day with that kinda attitude?"
"Oh, funny, ha-ha. Bite my ass, Teddy," Cody took a massive gulp of his hot chocolate, savoring the rich smoothness. God, it was like drinking heaven. "This is the best shit ever. You want a sip?"
"Really? You'd part with it for that long and you'd share it? Has Hell frozen over?"
"Fuck you, Ted."
"Okay, I'll try it. Just for you and no, I won't hog it all," he said, seeing Cody's expression darken. Cody watched closely as Ted's full lips parted against the Styrofoam cup, ignoring the voice that told him that Ted probably tasted better than anything else in the world, even his beloved hot chocolate. "Yum. I might just steal it."
"Oh fuck no!" Cody hissed, yanking the cup from Ted's hand, greedily drinking the contents at an alarming rate, not liking how Ted was eyeballing him. He paused mid swallow, noticing that a few drops of liquid were still on Ted's bottom lip. It would have been too easy to lean forward and claim those lips but he couldn't. Not when he'd been harboring this secret for far too long. He wasn't about to give in now. Not even with Valentine's Day just around the corner.
Because he was one of those idiots that couldn't tell his crush that he loved him. Not in almost ten years. And Cody had gotten used to it. Ted was as straight as they came, married, a devout religious man. Cody had dated in hopes that someone, anyone, could replace Ted in his heart but it was futile. Ted was burned into his soul and there was no replacing him.
"Mister Rhodes, you have a package," the man at the front desk said the second they walked into the lobby.
"Me?" Cody frowned, taking the package, a little wary. He'd seen Randy get dirty panties in the mail; he expected the worse every time he opened his mail these days. "I wonder who…"
"Hey guys! It's sooo cold outside," Evan grinned, running towards them. Sometimes, Evan's bouncy energy grated Cody's nerves and this was definitely one of those days. "Don't you wish you had someone to cuddle up next to?" he pointed into the bar at a booth where Jake, Randy, John, and Mike were.
Cody rolled his eyes, stifling the urge to tell Evan to just buy matching rings, he and Jake were so blatant about their relationship. If only he was an ass like Randy. "Sure, why not? Maybe this is a bomb and it'll blow us all up."
"Cool!" Evan bounded back towards the table, reminding Cody eerily of Tigger.
"Did he really-"
"Yeah, Teddy, he did," Cody bit his lip to keep his laughter down. Evan was in Jake's lap and probably had had too much to drink already. The man could not hold his liquor. "So, what do you think it is?"
Ted shrugged nonchalantly, sliding in next to a pouting Mike, "Aww, Miz, what's up with the long face, man?"
"He hasn't gotten laid in a week," Evan piped up, getting smacked in the face with a piece of ice from Mike's untouched martini, "Dude!"
"Duuuudddee!" Mike grinned, "Where's my car?"
"That was the worse movie, ever! Even though Ashton's like really, really hot!"
"I'm surrounded by morons," Randy groaned, "Coddles, what you got, man?"
Cody shrugged, fidgeting with the tape on the top of it, "There's no return address. I'm kind of scared to know. Remember, dirty panties?"
John laughed a little too loudly, his eyes already glassy from alcohol, "At least he didn't get a jock strap."
"Um, wow, John, that's really…gross," Jake grimaced, "I'm glad I'm not popular enough to be getting that kind of fan mail."
"Quit bein' a pussy and open it, Cody."
Cody glowered darkly at Mike before he ripped off the tape, removing a red heart adorned present in the shape of what else, a heart. So cliché. "Valentine's Day crap. Great. I don't even want it."
"Ah, someone went to a good deal of time to wrap that. The least you could do is open it," Ted drawled, making him feel guilty for being so crass.
Cody prepared himself for the worse. If there was any women or men's undies in there, or cups or- His mouth fell open when he removed the paper. There, in it's stupid heart shaped box, were his guilty pleasure; a pleasure he rarely divulged in because of the amount of calories and carbohydrates per serving (what, he didn't have his body because he ate junk food.) Milk chocolate truffles with a white chocolate center, crushed hazelnuts sprinkled over the top; it was better then sex. Or at least the sex he'd had couldn't compare to the truffles. "These are like…expensive and hard to find. And it's kinda freakin' me out that someone out there stalks me enough to know that these are my favorite, even more then Randy's caramels."
"Someone after your heart?" Ted asked, serious but Cody was too shocked and excited to notice.
"Well, fuck yeah! The way to a man's heart is through his stomach and I might just love who sent these." He popped one into his mouth, eyes closing, face a picture of pure bliss. He could have moaned and he probably would have if he was by himself and didn't want to look like a weirdo in front of his friends. "Why didn't they put their name at least?"
"Maybe they didn't think you'd care," Ted said gruffily.
"They spent like a hundred dollars on 12 truffles!" Cody exclaimed, greedily holding the box to his chest, not appreciating the looks from his friends. "That's way above and beyond what anyone should have done. I'd at least like to say thanks. What? I'm not that big of a brat."
"Do you still hate Valentine's Day?"
"This is proof, Teddy. A hundred dollars for one gift. Kinda excessive. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm goin' to my room, watching porn, and eating my truffles. Good night."
Ted sighed, watching his best friend leave, hot chocolate in one hand and box of candy in the other. Randy was watching him curiously. "How many people knew that Cody liked those? Whoever got those knew what to get because that was a pretty specific order…" Randy was looking at him pointedly, "I'm gonna smoke. Why don't you come with me, Ted?"
Ted didn't get a chance to respond, Randy yanking him out of his seat by the arm. The other four were oblivious to their departure, too absorbed in their drinking to notice. "What the fuck are you trying to pull, Ted?" he asked when they were out of ear shot, the cold January air burning their lungs.
"I don't know what you're talkin' about, man."
"Bullshit!" Randy snapped, "You hurt him and I swear to God, they won't find all the parts to your body."
Ted shoved Randy hard against his chest, "Fuck you!" he snarled, "If you care so fuckin' much-"
"Don't push me Teddy," Randy warned, "Don't you dare. I care about Cody but not like you think. Ted, you're the only one that knows Cody likes that kind of chocolate. The only one that-"
"I know, okay? I know!" Ted angrily rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand, feeling the tears forming, hating to break down in front of Randy Orton. "But he won't see me as anything more then his best friend. But he deserves to be treated like a prince. And I won't stand by and let another person use and abuse him because they just want his body."
"So you send him Valentine's gifts? What's that going to accomplish?" Randy asked, wiping the tears coursing Ted's cheek with his thumb. "You're not gonna tell him it's you."
"I am. Just not right now. I…I have a plan and when that plan's finished, he'll know it's me. He has to know it's me or…or I'll have lost my friend."
Randy nodded, apparently satisfied with Ted's intentions, "Okay. I can deal with that. Why now, Ted? You've been pining for him for how many years? At least seven?"
"Because I want to be happy and I want him happy. Besides, Randy, don't you think you should do something about your own crush?" Ted nodded towards the window at the group of men inside. "John deserves to know just as much as Cody."
"No. I can't. Look, it's different. John's never been with another man. He freezes up when I mention anything about it. And he still can't shower at the same time as me, not since he found out that I'm bi."
"Maybe he's nervous and being alone with you, in the showers, naked…" Ted shrugged, "It could turn him on."
"Doubt it but wishful thinking. Come on, I'll buy you a drink. God knows you need one right now. Ted, how do you do it?" he asked as they walked back inside the hotel. "How do you spend every day and night with him and stay sane? This is killing me to be so far from John yet so close."
"Patience. Lots of it. And a lot of masturbating."
"Thanks for that oh so lovely image," Randy scowled, "Ugh. You suck."
"I'm sorry," Ted laughed, not feeling sorry at all. "Thanks for listening, Randy."
Ted glanced wistfully at Evan and Jack. He wanted that with Cody. His gaze fell on Mike who was busily sending text messages on his phone, face having brightening up considerably. He was no doubt messaging Morrison. He smiled a little, seeing John's eyes follow each and every step that Randy made. Maybe it wasn't hopeless for them. But it seemed like it was for him and Cody.
This is meant to be humoruous and quite possibly some of the boys are OOC. I don't know how they really act outside of the ring. :P Creative Liberty. ;)