A/N: I don't own any elements of Twilight or this story.
Before you start: This is Leah/Jasper ship. Will sail slowly but surely. I am not objective in my judgment and have little sympathy for some cannon characters. Be aware:)
The first chapter is short as it is an introduction to the story. Yet, the story will be larger and chapters longer depending on content.
Beta: BlackwaterLove the Great
"So this is my life," she thought of past years and the tiny community of La Push.
When she was younger, she always hoped for a new day to bring a change and take her away form the small reserve, its poverty and unemployment, its gossip and obscurity. So every day, she went to the small community school and hoped. She found someone who loved her, as strongly as she only wished. He gave her hart and support—together they planned on escape, moving to the city and starting college. But then he took away her hart and disabled like that, her hope left her a little.
Yet, after graduating, she still hanged on; working at the only grocery store in the area, she still counted on some change, everyday. And like this, day-by-day, her hope went away, slowly eaten by the obscurity of her everyday.
And perhaps this was the main reason that the night before her twenty-fifth birthday, Leah stood on the beach, her face looking toward the red line of the horizon. "Fate," she thought, "I am though with waiting for you."
" I am stronger than you, and I am not waiting for you any longer. I will make my life my own." She closed her eyes, her long hear dancing with the wind around her face.
Fate listened to Leah and smiled, "But I am not though with you Leah, not by a long shot my little one."
Fate focused her timeless eyes on the girl, "Your life begins now."
Walking back home, she kept her human form. Night was dark and humid wind pulled the warm air toward the ocean. Sand was quiet under her feet as she walked. The ocean roared in darkness, and only lonely pelicans cried over its steady hum. The birds flew above her head, always staying close to the water. "It is like my life. Being wolf makes me stay here."
And this was true; her recent decision hurt her is some way despite being a smart choice considering she was 25, looked like 20, and still needed her education. This and a small fact that there was almost no jobs for her in the reserve and any decent position in La Push was filled by college-graduated White middle class. She snored at the thought.
Being a wolf gave amazing life, potential infinite life, breathtaking animal wildness, and a new sense of self. Indeed, she loved her new instincts and power. The moment of phasing, once mastered, brought a pure explosion of senses and perceptual orgasm of perfect vision and smell. Yet, her instincts made her into an animal giving her unstable fits of range, forcing her to stay with her pack, making her weak and obedient every time she faced the voice of her alpha. And this part of her wolf-self she hated. She despised how dog-like her personality became.
Like with all pack members, the essence of her was coated in commitment and faithfulness. Dog-like devotion to other wolfs who, frankly, looked at her as alien and stranger despite their general acceptance of the she-wolf. Canine loyalty that forced her to follow her alpha. The alpha with ego as overgrown as his immaturity, the alpha who forced them to stay wolfs and protect his vampire-ish imprint.
With night, the beach grew quieter, wind coming down to strong gusts of warmth on her face. Walking slowly and watching the contours of the trees and water, she smiled at the thought of what was to happen.
"Who would though that coming back to school would make me feel happy?"
At the thoughts of going to college she felt her life grew more important. She felt important and mature, growing above her cheap clothes and dark color of the skin. Her head filled with dreams of new people and the power of knowledge, her walk gained a happy bounce. She turned away from the wind and climbed the sand back to the road and home.
The road was quiet with night so dark her eyes strained to see the pavement under her feet. And yet, the smell and fine sounds of summer forest guided her senses.
In the past she hoped to study things she liked, literature or music. She hoped to pursue something artful and light, something full of creativity and wildness. Yet, with years, the importance of staying close to her family started to matter. Now, finding a career that would allow her to stay close to her home, and perhaps support Seth through college, became her focus. The protective, wolf side of her dictated her plans now.
"My decision is final!"
"Do you know what you are even talking about?"
"I am more that capable of being among people, I haven't touched them in decades, Alice. Now I actually have to learn how to live with them. How long do you think you can keep me secluded from everyone!" Jasper's voice rang among the walls of the spacious house.
Carlisle looked at his wife, both staying quiet.
"You are not the only one. How about including us into your decision." Now Alice was fuming. Stepping close to his face she shouted, her eyes focused on Jasper's.
"I'm thinking of you! I need to re-learn the society so I can be what you want me to. I feel your frustration that we always have to stay secluded," he looked at her, "Can you deny that?"
Alice stared at him, her moth moving but not forming words.
"Jasper, you know," her face pleading despite fists tightly clenched at her sides, "you know that since that night …Perhaps you need more time?"
"More time? Alice, I attacked Bella at her party, I know." His lips curled lightly in self-conscious disgust, " but it was seven years ago. I am different now. Don't you see? I feed on animals regularly and I work on being with humans"
"Why don't you see that, Alice?" His face was still carrying the signs of self-loathing, but Jasper's body took a defensive stance.
Carlise and Esme observed how Jasper moved away from Alice, clearly annoyed at feelings he read form her.
"I feel your disatisfaction, Alice." Before he left the room, Jasper turned to her again, "I started to think about going to school last year. And since than, you became angry. Angry and disappointed with me."
"Why wont you enroll with me? When was the last time you went to school? You could start on a new degr-…"
"No Jasper. I will not."
This time Alice moved away even further from Jasper, "I cannot."
They stood in the opposite corners the Cullen's living room, separated by only thin air. And yet, the still air felt like a timeless divider between the two.
Then, both left the room. Without a word and without making a single noise, the couple left each taking different exit.
Esme kept quiet, witnessing the scene.
It was not the first fight of theirs. Recently they became more than recent and louder than usual.
Jasper started to avoid Alice hunting and roaming forests though night. Alice became quiet and angry and avoided everyone.
When asked what future she saw, Alice preferred to stay elusive. " I don't see much, Esme. It is as if he disappeared. I only see me. Me alone."
Esme slowly sniffed the air. The air was still humid and heavy with impeding rain. It was like any other morning in La Push, which inevitably would end up with a rainy afternoon.
Yet, she also felt something new.
Ions of excitement that buzzed her senses.
The change was coming like a wave.
A/N: This is just a start. Thank you for reading.