I always blamed you
Hey lovely reviewers and other people I think are lovely, sorry I seem like I have been dead. I wasn't I just had more writers block...-.- oh summer how you hate me so. Anyways this is the next chapter that you awesome sauce people have been waiting for so please read on. Rated M for smut, language (mainly Hidan) and yaoi. No flamers please and people I would love it dearly if you would read and review not read and go away. I accept anonymous reviewers too so yea...Review! I don't own anything (not the characters, the plot, the pasts if they happen to be what Masashi Kishimoto came up with or ANYTHING!)
I had just proposed to Dei, I had been planning this for a while now and its finally coming true. Dei will soon be my wifey and do the housework from now on. I was kissing and hugging him when Pein called us down for a meeting. I grabbed Deidara's hand and walked down to the main hall with him. Three people were already there aside from Pein and Konan. It happened to be Zetsu, Kisame and Itachi. Then we came and went in our assigned seats. Soon after our arrival Tobi arrived and then Kakuzu who was dragging Hidan. Hidan didn't want to be here, he would much rather be sleeping or doing more rituals but it was a pretty important meeting so he had to come.
"Excellent, now that you are all here I would like to discuss something. Today is a special day, Konan made it up, tell everyone how you were born." Pein explained. Isn't it obvious leader? We all had parents at one point, well maybe except Hidan...he might have been thrown out of hell or something.
"Leader I have a question!" Kakuzu stated while throwing his hand in the air.
"What is it Kakuzu?" Pein pointed to Kakuzu like a school teacher...not an unusual thing for leader to do.
"Why does this relate to our primary mission?" Kakuzu had a point, why does this relate and what relevance will this have?
"Uh...it doesn't really relate or have any relevance at all...its just for fun. So lets have Kisame start!"
Kisame thought about it hard. He sat down and thought, Itachi thought that was very cute. "Uh my mom was a shark and my dad was a human and they mated and had me in a sac." Everyone stared at Kisame for a moment, Hidan started busing up with laughter.
"HOW THE HELL DID YOUR DAD MATE WITH A FUCKING SHARK?" Hidan was rolling and laughing, he was actually crying it was so funny to him. Dei was giggling which didn't surprise me but I didn't think it was that unusual. How else would Kisame have been born?
"Ok now lets ask...Deidara." Pein said pointing at my Dei who stopped giggling.
"Ok un. I was born with a perfectly fine mom but on my dad's side un, there's a genetic disorder that skipped him and got me and that's how I ended up having hand mouths un!" I never knew that, I never asked either.
"Ok now Tobi." Pein said again pointing like a school teacher...man that was getting to the point of annoying.
"OK! Tobi is a good boy, Tobi had two parents who made a Tobi in bed! Then Tobi came out of mom and was named Tobi!^-^" Could you say Tobi more than twice in a sentence? That was more annoying than Pein.
"Now Itachi." Point. Grrr...stop it!
"I was born with two parents in a hospital like any other baby, I was just specialer then them." Specialer? Was that even a word?
"Ok now...ah Hidan. Why don't you tell us how you were born."
"I clearly have no idea and all I care about is that I'm alive to worship mah Jashin sama." Pein and the rest of the Akatsuki went silent and stared at Hidan for a few seconds.
"Ahem well ok...Sasori!" Pein said while looking at me. I might as well tell them I was born a normal child.
"I was born a normal child in the sand village, then I decided to become a puppet...now I'm human again. I can't make up my mind I suppose." I smirked and looked at Deidara who had a cute little grin on his face like he had never killed anyone and went to church every Sunday. Ew.
"Ok Kakuzu? You wanna share?" Pein said.
"Ok then...Zetsu how about you?" I had always wondered how he was born...he was a plant for Jashin's sake! Oh no I'm turning into a Hidan...i hate myself.
"Well...i don't really know but if I had to make an educated guess-"
"Educated guess? just tell them a lie!"
"They'll figure it out eventually!"
"Not if you keep it a secret!"
"Fine...I had a plant as a mom and a human as a dad and well my dad mated with the plant and fertilized it and I came out as a seed and planted in the ground. My dad came by and watered me everyday until I got out of the dirt and joined Akatsuki." Clearly that internal conflict was something to be worried about but nobody bothered. Pein thanked Zetsu and dismissed us. Me and Dei held hands and walked towards our room, Hidan and Kakuzu walked by and I could hear Hidan ranting halfway down the hall.
"Leader sama asked me about mah past...I don't fucking know! GAWD DAMMIT KAKUZU! I WANT A COOKIE! I AM ZIM! FEAR ME AND MY DESTRUCTIVE POWER OF JASHIN DOOOOOOOM!" Then Hidan fell on his face. Kakuzu picked him up by his hair and drug him to their room. Apparently he is Zim and he has destructive Jashin powers. Great the Akatsuki has officially gone insane. I followed Dei into my room and sat next to him on the bed we now shared since he slept with me and never went into his own room anymore.
"You know un. We never got to hear of Konan and Pein's past or how they were born."
"I know, its kinda stupid how we were the only ones that had to share and leader and his pet didn't."
"I wouldn't call Konan a pet, we do the same workout routine." Deidara and Konan did the same workout routine? Why wasn't I informed about it?
"Well, lets just see how that workout routine has affected your body shall we?" I started to take Dei's cloak off of him and I looked at his body. He was toned...I like it. He had muscles and his stomach was flat, along with his arms and ass. I pulled him into my lap and kissed him. He whimpered when my hand trailed down his body and to his growing problem. He licked my bottom lip and asked for entrance which I have of course allowed. He tried to dominate and I wasn't going to have any of that. I forced my tongue into dominance and layed him down on the bed, I stroked him gently he moaned and wrapped his arms around my neck.
Sasori stroked me and I threw my arms around his neck but I experienced something that I hadn't had to relive for a long time.
"Don't struggle, you'll just end up getting hurt more."
"AAHHH OW TAKE IT OUT IT HURTS!" The man thrust into Deidara's virgin cavern and tore him in half. He kept thrusting until Deidara was bleeding and screaming for help. There was no one around, then the man hit a spot inside Deidara and made him see spots in his vision. He threw his arms around the man and told him to stop, the man didn't listen because he angled himself and hit that exact same spot again making Deidara scream in pleasure and spray his hot fluid on the man's and his lower abdomens.
"Nooo!" I said pushing Sasori off me and scrambling for the edge of the bed. Sasori tried to comfort me and put his hand out to me. I just smacked it away afraid of that happening again. Me and Danna had sex before so why was my past now coming back to haunt me? It must have been because we were talking about them with leader. Sasori again put his hand out to me and offered me his comfort. Another flashback and I screamed and curled into a ball, I cried too.
"Dei...I won't hurt you can you tell me what happened? Did I do something wrong?" No danna, you didn't but I mainly blame leader for my episode today. I used to have flashbacks all the time but now its been 5 years since my last one.
"N-no...it's just my past came back to haunt me danna un, and I thought you were...him." I told him.
"Do you wanna tell me about it?" I nodded and calmed down, I mean he was my fiance after all.
"When I was about 14 I was raped by a man named Jariya. He had white hair and he was supposedly a sanin. He raped me in an alley where no one dared to go in because of the murders happening there. I yelled and screamed for someone to help me but I ended up almost enjoying the whole thing. He didn't stop when I told him and he just kept going. un."
Sasori danna looked at me with sorrowful eyes, this was the first time I had told him about the whole thing.
"I'm going to kill Jariya. He won't hurt another person especially you. Tomorrow we leave to go kill him so be ready by then. If he even tries anything while I'm incapacitated (highly unlikely) or not aware then just call for me. If he does anything to you I will rip his cock off and feed it to him and then I'll rip out his intestines and give his heart to Hidan to do rituals with." Danna seemed serious, dead serious. I didn't want to see Jariya again but Saso said he was gonna kill him. So I have to go with him to catch him off guard and put him off his guard.
Bonus story Pein's destiny:
After talking with Kakuzu I feel better about myself now, I have to go fill out papers and give calls. I really don't want to. I would rather do something dirty! *Goes into Konan's dresser* Hmm what do we have here? Ohh nice nice!
"Wait...since when does Konan wear boxers with Jashin symbols on them?" *Turns around*
"Aheheh hey Hidan, how long have you been there?"
"About the WHOLE FUCKING TIME YOU WERE RAVAGING MAH DRAWERS!"
"Uh...I was just...bye!" *Runs away*
"GAWD DAMMIT LEADER GET BACK HERE! I GONNA RIP EVERY ONE OF THOSE DAMN PIERCINGS OUT ONE BY ONE AND USE THEM AS A BASE FOR MY RITUALS IF YOU DONT GET BACK HERE! AND GIMME BACK MAH JASHIN BOXERS!"
And thus Pein's epic journey continues.
Well how was this chappy? I hope you liked it, I got some requests for Deidara's past and I wanted to make Dei feel icky. I also added how Zetsu was born, hope you got a laugh out of that. I just made it up so don't kill me. Anyways please review. Oh ya I made up most of their pasts and how they were born so I don't take credit if they really were born that way. uh...well I'm gonna need 5 reviews for the next chapter so please review, I take anonymous reviews too! DON'T FLAME!