A little something that just popped up in my head. It's an odd one, I know.


Pip glanced up as he heard the childish singing. It sounded like a little girl. Pip didn't now of any little girls in Hellsing. He waited as the sound came closer to the hall he stood smoking in. With a twirl a small fragile fourteen-year-old girl waltz through the hall.

"Oi." He called attention to the girl as she passed him, her long strait black hair swaying around her back. She turned a pair of sharp red eyes on him. Pip's hand reached down for his gun casually as if only resting it on his hip. "What's a little girl like doing strolling though Hellsing?"

"Shut up, Aussie." She stuck a little tongue out and turned again.

"Hey, you little vampire bitch, get back here!" And Pip withdrew his gun and shot it at her shoulder.

It blasted through the flesh, sending blood spurting into the air and onto the ground. The girl ran with a cackle and scream of delight as if it were some game. Pip ran after her as she turned the corner.

As Pip turned the same corner he froze as he was met by the tall foreboding Alucard. He looked around the vampire's body to see if he could spot the little girl, but he saw nothing. He looked up nervously at Alucard again. "You 'aven't seen a little bratty vampire running around, 'ave you?"

Alucard made a slight grin, as he rubbed his shoulder, "No."

"Uuuhhh…" Pip shook his head. Had he been seeing things? "Never mind then…aha…" and he turned around and walked slowly back to his place in the hall where he had been before.

Then he heard it again. Then he saw it again. A little fourteen-year-old vampire girl skipping down the hall. She winked at Pip as she passed by. "Hi there."

Pip tried to ignore her. It's just your imagination, just your imagination.

"I said HI THERE." She stomped her foot before him.

He tried to ignore her.

"I SAID HI THERE." And she dug her little foot into his.

Pip cried out as she crushed his middle toe. No, his mind wasn't playing tricks this time. "Gah!" He withdrew his gun, "Come back 'ere!" He fired several rounds, all of them tearing apart one of her arms as she ran with a squeal of delight.

But like before, he turned the corner and saw nothing except for Alucard, who was picking at his fingers silently while leaning on a closed door. He glanced up at Pip, who was breathing hard and gaping at the empty hall. "What's you problem?" Alucard asked.

Pip only silently walked back into the hall where he had been before, his toe throbbing with pain. It was defiantly broken, but there was no little vampire to hunt down for it. He groaned as he lit another cigarette. He was going to shoot for her head this time, even if she was a little girl.

She came. Prancing along like any other happy little girl.

"Hi there." She stopped and said with her hands behind her back.

Pip pulled out a gun and aimed it at her head, smiling. "Hi there." He fired.

Her head was thrown back by the blast as it went through the center of her forehead, but her body did not fall back, instead she stood up strait again, a mad smile in her eyes and on her lips. "Again!" She cackled as the blood trailed down her face.

Pip's lip twitched. "Die already!" And he set to empting his gun into the little vampire.

Her body jerked with the shots put into her, blood flying up as she was shot and blasted. Once Pip's gun was empty her body fell to its knees and slumped back in a pool of blood.

Pip sighed as he lowered his gun and his head. Then he rubbed his eye as he looked up again. He jumped, startled.

Alucard stood there where the bloody dead girl had been, but all evidence of her slaughter was gone. "Alucard! What the f---, stop doing that!"

His form swirled for a moment and he disappeared, then standing in his place was the little girl. "I'm just a little girl looking for someone to play with." And she/he smiled.

Pip gawked for a moment, then growled through his teeth. "I hate you so much right now."

She ran away cackling madly.

Random! But we never see these two interact much, now do we? Fanfic writers of Hellsing, lets write more Alucard and Pip interaction! I agree with user VampiresGutsFangsBlood on that one.