: Hi! Since I got so many reviews for 'Cinderella' I wrote another parody as thanks and this time its 'Little Red Riding Hood'! When I first thought of this idea, I was thinking… "What anime am I going to put it with? Gravitation(Woodcutter-Yuki)? Naruto(Wolf-Sasu)? Saiyuki(Mother-Sanzo)?" After contemplating it for days or weeks, I decided to go with Junjou. Anyways, I hope you like it. ^_^
Disclaimer: …it's obvious isn't it? No need to rub it in my face.
Warnings: It's a parody…a poorly done fairytale and BL(Boy's Love)-considering it's Junjou Romantica-with a lemon ice-cream serving. You know what I mean…I'm inexperience at writing lemons so you can skip it if you want to.
Summary: What happens to the little red riding hood who hates her little red riding hood?
-:-Little Red Riding Hood-:-
Once upon a time there was a village gi—boy with dark-brown hair and deep-green eyes, he's quite an ordinary guy but let's not talk about that because it'll hurt his pride as a main character if he had nothing special. His mother…er…father loved him dearly, as did his grandmother, who had bought him a little red riding hood which suited him so well because he was also small.
"I'm never wearing that freaking riding hood ever again!" Misaki exclaimed angrily.
Sorry, that was a sensitive topic…Enough of the riding hood, it may be the title of this story but it's not our hero's name or even related to what my tale like most fairytales so let's skip that. One day his father said to him…
"Your grandmother is not feeling very well. Go see how she is and take some of your homemade cookies and jar of jelly." Hiroki, his father, ordered.
"Sick?" Misaki felt a bit worried.
"Just do it!" Hiroki bellowed, scaring the hell out of him.
"Y-YES!" He quickly scrambled to the kitchen and grabbed his coat and shoes.
In the end, Misaki agreed-forced-to go, it's not like his home is the best place to be especially when you have a demon for a father, he thought he just saw Hades back there. But still, he didn't want to go to his grandmother's house…for several reasonable reasons but he had no other choice. At least, that was what he told himself.
He left right away before his irritable father could throw a knife or something equally dangerous to him, making sure that he took the cookies and jam so he wouldn't have to go back again.
"Stupid grandmother!" Misaki screamed, his grandmother lived in another village so he had to walk a long distance. He can't afford to ride on a vehicle since it was expensive, besides, is there a means of public transportation back then in the middle of the forest? Why the fuck is her grandmother's house so far away? Why the hell is he little red riding hood when he wasn't wearing the fucking hood? You chose the wrong fairytale! Damn it!
While he was busy complaining…to himself, a wolf appeared. He didn't dare hurt little red riding hood—Misaki because there were lots of woodcutters nearby, he didn't wish to die in such a young age so he pretended to be kind and casually asked Misaki where he was going, he introduced himself as Sumi Keiichi.
According to what the brunette heard, wolves were dangerous, they eat people and gobble them up in one swoop or something but since the wolf looked nice enough, he thought it was alright.
"I'm going to visit my grandmother." He politely said.
"Oh? Does she live far away?" Sumi asked.
"Yeah, her house is beyond the hill, the tallest building in the village." Misaki pointed at its direction.
"I see." He smirked to himself and after a small chat, they bid goodbye.
After Misaki was out of sight, Sumi, the wolf, set off to the shortest path he knew, running as fast as he could to the grandmother's house while Misaki took the longer path because he wasn't in a rush besides he didn't want to climb the hill. Meanwhile, Sumi didn't take very long to reach the grandmother's large abode.
He pressed the doorbell, once he confirmed that it was grandmother's home. This was his chance!
"Who is it?" came a voice from inside.
"It's your granddaught-son little red riding hood." He replied.
"Lift up the latch and come in." Sumi did as told and once he was inside he-
The sun was about to set by the time Misaki arrived at his grandmother's house.
He fumbled for his key and opened the lock, he hesitated at first, knowing what was waiting for him beyond the door but remembered that his grandmother was sick and she can't take care of herself, well, even if she isn't ill she still can't take care of herself. What a handful grandmother!
Misaki lifted the latch and came in. "It's me, Misaki." He called out, putting down his luggage on the coffee table, seeing there was no one on the first floor he went up the stairs and knocked on his grandmother's bedroom.
He was shocked at the sight, though, it's always surprising to see such a large residence in the middle of the forest and a maisonette at that! But what he saw in his grandmother's bed made him even surprised not because of the massive toys…but because of…however, before he could speak, strong arms were already wrapped around him.
"What took you so long, Misaki?" Misaki blushed upon hearing the husky voice whisper behind his ear.
"U-Usagi-san…I mean, Grandmother?" he quickly turned around and stepped back, indeed it was his silver-haired lover. "Uh, I-I was t-tal—wait! Why the hell is Sumi-san tied on your bed? What did you do to him? Why the heck is he here?" he demanded angrily pointing at the poor guy covered with ropes, he didn't appreciate his new friends getting scared off by Usagi-san and…he was kinda, just a little jealous…perhaps.
"You know him?"
"Un. I met him in the forest earlier."
"How many times do I have to tell you not to talk to strangers?"
"Shut up! I'm not a little kid besides I—don't change the subject!" Misaki irritatedly said, but Usami was completely ignoring his words. "Why the hell is Sum-"
"Hmm, the woodcutter will be arriving soon." Usami said as he looked at his watch.
"Hey! Listen to me!"
"So noisy." he covered his ears with his index fingers while Misaki annoyedly ranted. Suddenly, the woodcutter, Takahiro barged into the room, his face etched with worry and panic.
"Misaki! Usagi! Are you alright? I'm going to save you right now!" Takahiro swung his ax as he frantically looked around for the wolf.
"Nii-cha—I mean woodcutter! What are you doing her-?"
"Takahiro!" Usami greeted cheerfully. Takahiro turned to the source of the voice.
"Misaki! Usagi! You're safe!" the woodcutter sighed in relief.
"I knew this guy…" Usami pointed at the tied Sumi. "…wasn't Misaki since they had different voices besides Misaki will never call himself little red riding hood."
"Oh! Good job Usagi. I didn't know you were so skilled at identifying voices." Usami just chuckled while Takahiro stared at him with awe. That's not only the thing he knew about Misaki…
"You can collect this guy, Takahiro."
"Of course." Takahiro took the tied wolf and left, waving goodbye to the two while dragging the criminal. "Bye Misaki, Usagi! I'll visit sometime again and I'll bring Manami and Mahiro next time!"
"…What the—was that even in the story?" Misaki quickly flipped his copy of the book "Little Red Ring Hood" but found no such scene. "Usagi-san?"
"Finally it's over. Why do I have to be the grandmother, I'm not that old, besides, this role doesn't fit me at all. And why does Hiroki get to be mother when he's as old as me?" He really hates the fact that he could only be with Misaki at the end of the story. Suddenly his cellphone rang. "Hello?"
"Professor Miyagi's not available also you look the oldest because of your silver hair." Hiroki's voice came from the other line and before Usami can retort back, he already hanged up. I didn't know mobile phones were already invented that time! Moreover, how did Hiroki hear him?
"He's right. Just accept it Usagi-san, besides, the story is almost ending, you should've complained earlier, actually this is the end, right? Why the hell are we adding these crap here?" Misaki scolded. "Geez, why do we keep screwing this fairytale up, the readers are gonna freak out and you had to get sick too-" Then he remembered something, the very purpose why is he here! "You're not sick at all, bastard!"
"It's true that I'm not feeling well."
"Liar!" nevertheless the brunette still checked if there was something wrong with his lover but he found none.
"I ran out of Misaki then Aikawa came and beat me up because my manuscript was a month late-" Usami explained.
"Meet your fucking deadlines!"
"So I called a doctor named Nowaki, I guess he told Hiroki." He continued monotonously.
"What? You got me worried for nothing!" Misaki angrily shouted.
"Worried? For me?" Usami teasingly asked, smiling happily.
"N-Noo…of course, not." red covered Misaki's face as he realized what he just said.
"Just admit it."
"Admit what? You idiotic pervert!" the brunette screamed. 'There's no way I can say something embarrassing like that! Besides, it'll only make him even more conceited.' he thought and he really didn't need that. Usami was smirking at him like he was planning something…that won't be good…for him at least. "U-Umm…Usagi-san…" he recoiled until his back was against the wall, then above him he spotted the clock, it was about dinner time.
"You even went all the way here, let's do-"
"AHHHHHH! I'm going to start up dinner!" he hurriedly ran for the kitchen before Usami could grab him.
Now that Misaki looked at it, he noticed that the kitchen was messy, actually, the whole place was a total disaster, like a storm got in or something, Usami's shirts and other articles were scattered around, the ashtray was full of snuffed out cigarettes even Suzuki-san's ribbon looked grayish blue already, probably not been changed.
"As I thought, he really doesn't know how to take care of himself." He exasperatedly sighed, he decided to clean up a bit before cooking dinner; he put all the shirts lying around to the laundry basket then picked up the pieces of paper on the floor. He had advised Usami to use paper and pen instead of the laptop when writing because it saves electricity. Usami said he didn't need to since he was rich but Misaki insisted also it was a waste of money. Yes, laptops were also developed at that period.
When he was about to begin cooking, he spotted a balled paper under the coffee table. Misaki was about to throw it but he got curious of what kind of novel his lover was writing recently so uncrumpled it. "This better not be another BL novel…!" But to his surprise, there was only one sentence on the paper and after reading it he could only mutter a soft, "That moron."
It's very ridiculous how that homo pervert can make him extremely happy by just writing a single sentence. He was really thankful that Usagi-san was busy playing with Suzuki-san because he was sure he was grinning like an idiot right now. 'I feel stupid.'
'I miss Misaki.'
"Umm, U-Usagi-san?" Misaki washed the dishes while Usami ate the cookies Misaki had brought as a snack, he was rereading his manuscript.
"Y-You...if you want to s-see me…i-it's fine…" he blushed as he lowered his voice and hesitantly spoke but other still heard him. "…don't make lame e-excuses and j-just tell me!" by this point, Misaki's whole face even his ears are red, he embarrassedly turned away and concentrated on furiously scrubbing the grease from the plates.
Then he heard Usami's laughter behind him, emerald green eyes glanced at the man on the couch, he saw Usami's amethyst eyes widened for a moment before he smiled. "W-What? You have a problem with that?"
"No. Nothing." The author just continued to smile and chuckle.
"Damn it! Don't make fun of me!" He had the urge to throw the porcelain plate he was holding to the laughing idiot but gave up the idea, the plate might be expensive. Usami neared him, wound his arms around his waist and pulled him flush against him.
"Stay with me, Misaki." Usami whispered from behind in his low voice, he nuzzled his face against the brown hair inhaling Misaki's scent.
"Why should I?" he annoyedly asked.
"…" the silver-haired man just silently stared at him.
'Damn! Why does he always win? Life is so unfair…' Misaki sighed tiredly. "I'll have too since you can't take care of yourself." Usami seemed satisfied with the answer. '…I guess it can't be helped…'
"How the hell did it turn out like this?"
"Weren't you the one who seduced me?"
They are presently in the bedroom with Usami currently hovering over Misaki who is laying on the bed. Wait a second! This is a fairytale! Is it alright to put such things in? I think that's a bit too much…
"Huh? What are you talking about? When did I? In what way exactly?" Misaki irritatedly scowled at his lover, demanding answers. "You can't just molest other people without their permiss-" But before Misaki could continue, Usami had covered his lips with his own. "Mmph! Nnn…" Usami forcibly entered his mouth, his tongue swept all over the warm cavern then withdrew it to lick the plump pink lips before parting.
"You taste sweet today." He teased. "And I haven't refilled on my Misaki yet."
"Y-you stupid pervert, don't say such e-e-embarassing things!" Misaki blushed and panted, he pushed the older man away but Usami didn't budged, instead he lowered his head and lightly kissed and licked his neck.
"Hey! Wait! Stop! What are you doi—Listen to me when I'm talking!" He struggled when Usami was taking off his clothes, he would've succeeded in pushing the man off if not for the soft, insistent nibbling and suckling on his neck. "Wai-Ahh! Mmn!" Misaki moaned as he felt a wet sensation on his nipples.
"You like mouth here, right?" Usami mercilessly bit the perky nipple until it was bright red while he rubbed and twisted the other one.
"A-Ahh! Sh-Shut up! I-I don't…Haa—Ah…" Misaki adamantly denied, flushing in shame because he knew inwardly that the damned pervert was right but there's no way he's gonna say that to this egoistical bastard. Usami continued to trail his large hands over Misaki's tanned body, memorizing the boy's feel and heat, he really missed it.
'…his hands are so cold but why does my skin feel as if they're burning…?' Misaki shivered as those hands softly caressed his skin. "Hnn…"
Usami's mouth traveled lower until he reached Misaki's dripping arousal, it was so swollen and red that he eagerly licked Misaki's balls then trailed to the underside of his cock. "Ahh…hah…ah…uhh! That's-!" the teen grasped Usami's silver hair trying to ground himself futilely, Usami's right hand firmly held his cock, fingers rubbing against the heated skin while his tongue was sucking the head, swallowing the clear liquid spilling out of it.
"…ahh…ha…U-Usagi-san…stop…I-I can't…! AHHH!" With a cry, Misaki came, his body trembled as he spurted his cum into Usami's mouth, who gladly drank it. Usami pulled away to look at his lover, chuckling at how cute he was, his tanned, sweaty body flushed, his chest heaving as he panted heavily, his manhood and nipples equally red and swollen as his ravaged lips puffing for air even his cheeks were furiously blushing and his green orbs were misty.
He turned Misaki's body around so that he was on his elbows and knees, licking his lips hungrily when he caught sight of the boy's hole. "You're red even here." He commented, fleetingly touching it with his forefinger.
"I—Nnn! Noo…" Misaki was about to protest when Usami roughly ran his thumb over it, licked around the clenched muscles and shoved his tongue in the entrance. His hands parted the plump cheeks while his tongue stretched the tight hole. "Ohh…mnn…ngh!" Misaki flinched, his erection was hardening because of his lover's ministrations, he could feel the wet muscle probing in him. Usagi-san is really good at giving him pleasure.
Eventually, Misaki loosened, Usami gave one last kiss to the wet and dripping opening, leaving it slick yet sticky with his saliva. Misaki shuddered as the older man gave a long lick along his spine, leaving a kiss mark on the back of his neck. He gently entered Misaki, he slowly thrust, reveling in the tight silky texture of his lover around him and savoring it.
"AH! Usagi-san…ha…uhh…ah…" Misaki gasped and moaned sweetly, his face contorting in pleasure which was too seductive that Usami couldn't resist plunging in faster and harder into him.
"Hmmph! Hnn…Mn!" Misaki tightly clutched the sheets upon feeling the erection inside him dive in violently, he couldn't stop the embarrassing moans from coming out his mouth so he hid his face and covered his mouth using the pillow. Usami was displeased, he loved his small lover's irresistible face and his helpless cried out moans. He easily lifted Misaki, making him sit up and lean on his chest, the weight causing his arousal to be buried deeper inside.
"Let me hear them." He whispered huskily, placing small kisses along Misaki's neck. Usami heaved him up and slammed him down on his hard erection, he incessantly shoved in. "Hn!"
"Uwaah! Aaahhh! Haa! Ahhh! Ah!" Misaki tried but in the end he couldn't contain his screams, it was too much. He could practically hear the squelching wet sounds of their body as the hard manhood was getting hungrily swallowed by his ass and his cheeks smacking against Usami's thighs and balls.
"U-Usagi-s-san…I…Ha! Ahh! Yaa…ahh…hah!" Misaki stuttered, Usami simply cupped Misaki's redden cheeks, tilted his face and kissed him deeply, sucking the breath out of him. "Mnn…fuu…" his hands roamed around the brunette's body, he pinched the perky red nipples while his other hand skillfully pumped the erection. Misaki couldn't take anymore of this painful pleasure…it was too overwhelming. He could feel Usagi-san's cock thrust even harder and deeper. "Y-You have to…Nnn! S-stop! Ahh! I'm…"
"Haa…I…AHHHH!" Misaki came again, his body softly trembled and arched as he spurt his warm cum all over himself, his face twisted in sweet pleasure. Usami could feel the hot walls around him constricting tighter and spasm, the heat was unbearable and the expression of ecstasy on his lover, he was already at his limit. With a grunt, he also came, filling Misaki's opening to the brim.
"Ngh…" Misaki's eyes fluttered open automatically as the clock hit 6:00AM, he was still so tired but he can't go back to sleep anymore so without any other choice, he got up and did his morning routine. 'That bastard! He didn't let me sleep until morning!'
'I'm still not full of Misaki my ass!' he inwardly screamed. Besides whose ass is getting stuffed here anyway?
"Grr, damn him and his…" he growled to himself as he set the plates on the table. Because of 'him' he was having serious problems moving around, he winced every time he bent slightly and he was extremely exhausted. "Shit! I'm going to make him pay for this! I'll murder him in his sleep!" he laughed evilly while planning the bloody demise of his own lover.
"Misaki, what are you laughing about?" Usami asked as he descended the stairs, surprising Misaki making him jump and unluckily fall on his aching butt.
"OUCH! What the-?" he screamed, he glanced at the clock, it was 7:00AM already, which explains why the jerk is awake. He tried to pick himself up, using the table's edge to support him. Finally, after a few minutes, he successfully stood up but he was crouching and holding his hips as he walked, making him appear like a walking old man.
"Hahaha! The grandmother role fits you, Misaki, you've already mastered how to walk like one." Usami smugly laughed and taunted him.
"Shut up! It's all your fault, you shitty twisted pervert!" Misaki pointed accusingly at him as he tried to stand up straight. He piled the pancakes on the plate and poured maple syrup on the top layer, he made sure he drowned them in the syrup because he knew that Usami didn't like sweets.
"Oh? Do you want me to take responsibility for it?" Usami suggestively asked.
"No need." His younger lover flatly turned him down. Who knows what kind of making amends will the pervert do?
After breakfast, Misaki proceeded to clean the place before leaving, his mo—father must be worried about him, though he highly doubted that. Once the kitchen was done, he moved to the living room, he was about to wipe the coffee table when he noticed a stack of papers on it, if he remember correctly they weren't there yesterday.
"Hm? A manuscript? But I thought he just finished his newest novel." In his curiosity, he scanned the first two papers, his eyes widened, then he peeked at the twentieth page to confirm his suspicion, it was a slight reversion of last night's escapade. "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS CRAP? OI! YOU IDIOT, YOU WROTE ANOTHER BL AND YOU PUT ME IN IT AGAIN!"
"I was really inspired, I even finished next month's issue." Usami proudly sprouted, Misaki would've been glad but what's with the… 'Ahh! Akihiko-san open me and fill me up!'
"GAH! I won't let you publish another perverted book with me in it! GRR!" Misaki brutally tore all the paper into pieces. "H-how is that?" he panted as he sharply glared.
"As usual, the original is in here." Usami arrogantly smirked at him and showed the disc where he saved the next installment.
Before the bastard could hide it, Misaki quickly snatched it and snapped it into two then dropped it on the floor and stomped on it just for good measure. "Now it's gone forever!" he smiled victoriously.
"You have to stay here now, Misaki." Usami scolded.
"Why is that?" Misaki irritatedly asked.
"You ruined my manuscript and made a mess in my house, you have to take responsibility for it." The novelist explained pointing at the scattered papers on the floor.
"Fine." Misaki sighed defeatedly. Damn! The asshole won again! 'I guess I have to stay a little bit longer…' He felt like smiling at the thought, suddenly he felt his body being lifted up and being hauled to the…bedroom? "Hey! Wait! Just where do you think you're hauling me off to?" he protested.
"You said you'll take responsibility. You have to be punished."
"Just what kind of responsibility are you talking about?" Usami simply smirked, Misaki could clearly see the lecherous intentions reeking. He could be so naïve at times, Usami had already sent the manuscript to Aikawa thru e-mail. Misaki should start fearing the power of technology… "YOU HOMO, DIRTY OLD MAN!"
A/N: Did I disappoint you? My sister told me it's not as good as 'Cinderella' so I threw in an extra lemon for you fans so I won't dissatisfy you too much. Did you like the lemon? I'm no expert at writing lemons so I kept looking at the manga as a reference, but I don't think it worked so I apologize if you didn't like the lemon scene, anyway, let me hear your comments. Please review!