Title: Chapter Seven: Upping the Ante

Author: wife-chan

Rating: T

Warning: OOCness, Mood!Whiplash, language. Minor lesbianism ;D

Disclaimer: We don't own Naruto; Masashi Kishimoto does. We are not making any money from this fan fiction.

Notes: WE DON'T LIKE OUR SUMMARY ANYMORE. lol So we thought we'd ask to see what kind of summary you lovely reviewers would give Intimate Relations! Please, let us know, we like to know what you guys think when you think of IR.


Sasuke collapses to his knees on the roof, his arms wrapped around his cousin. He's fought off the fucking Ichibi! He did it, he took on a bijuu and won.

Okay, so he was able to talk the boy out of killing everyone by playing up his love for Naruto, but still! There had been a fight! He survived and defeated the One-Tailed Demon!

The downside to this is that Naruto is hurt. He's hurt bad and there's nothing that Sasuke can do about it. Naruto stirs in his arms and Sasuke looks down. The blond opens his eyes and the sharingan fades with the slit pupils from the Kyuubi.

Sasuke wonders if anyone saw Naruto's sharingan.

Someone clears their throat and Sasuke looks from his cousin to see the Hokage looking down at them, his arms hanging, useless, from his shoulders.

"Sasuke-kun." Sandaime's voice is gravelly, like he doesn't know how to respond to something shocking and Sasuke swallows, scared. Sandaime carefully kneels down, staring at the boy in Sasuke's arms. "I saw Naruto-kun's eyes." He looks back at Sasuke then, "And I know what Kushina's family name was before she was disowned."

Air catches in his throat and Sasuke doesn't know whether to laugh or cry. It's over. Everything they've worked so hard to keep (each other), it's over. The council's rulings can be overturned, but the Hokage's word is law.

There's a twinge from his Curse Seal and Sasuke bows his head over his cousin, "Please, Hokage-sama, please don't take him away from me."

"Sasuke," Sandaime purses his lips and then shakes his head, "We will speak of this later." He laboriously gets back to his feet and turns to his jounin and ANBU, commanding them as though Orochimaru hadn't just made him sacrifice his own arms to seal away his ex-students arms.

Soon enough everyone is gone but for Sandaime's personal ANBU and two medics; one poking tentatively at the Hokage's arms and the other standing a little ways away, as though not wanting to get close to Naruto to see if he can help.

Anger pulses through Sasuke and he pins the medic with a stern look, "If you can't see past the prisoner to see the prison, get the fuck out of here. Find someone who can see Naruto as a boy who just helped Sandaime-sama defeat Orochimaru and managed to save Konoha." He can feel the anger boiling up as he spits out the last word, "-again."

"Sasuke," the Hokage reprimands him sharply and Sasuke bows his head again, breathing deeply. "Control your anger. Do not let Orochimaru's seal work against you."

The sudden realization that he's so irrationally angry because of the seal makes him focus and he tries very, very hard to regain his control. Naruto wouldn't want him out of control like this. Because for all that Naruto seems out of control at times, he never actually is.

Naruto's bloody fingers trail over his arm and he watches the black markings retreat from his skin. Naruto smiles brokenly up at Sasuke, who can't help but sob just a little even as he watches Naruto's wounds heal on their own.

Naruto's never had anyone there to heal him, he's always had to do this by himself.

"I'm here now," Sasuke buries his face in Naruto's neck, like Naruto usually does to him, "I'm here now, Naruto."

"-love you," Naruto croaks out and Sasuke nods, not moving his face from Naruto's neck.

"Uh, Uchiha-san?" A voice comes from the side and Sasuke looks up to see a young woman in a healer's garb, "May I approach?" She asks and he nods, keeping his hold on his cousin.

She takes steady steps and her hands are green with chakra when she reaches for Naruto.

"Naruto?" Sasuke asks, wanting to make sure that she's not hurting him. Naruto smiles at him and he's relieved that his cousin is getting treatment. When the medic leans away from Naruto, Sasuke can see that she's fixed most of his wounds. Or, at least, helped his near regeneration ability work faster than ever before.

"Uchiha-san," She turns to him and Sasuke blinks at her in question, "I'd like to look you over as well," she says and reaches for his arm. She takes his elbow and Sasuke startles only for a moment before shaking her off.

"Don't touch me-" He takes a deep breath, "No, I'm fine."

There's a look in her eyes that Sasuke doesn't like and he ignores her as she tries to speak to him again. Instead he focuses on Naruto, helping his cousin to his feet.

The blue shirt Naruto's wearing is almost completely purple with the blood but Sasuke doesn't let that stop him from drawing Naruto into a hug. (He's already covered in Naruto's blood anyway.)

If this is the last time they have together before the Hokage separates them, he's going to stay as close to Naruto as possible.

A person (male or female, Sasuke isn't sure) in a black cloak and white mask appears beside them and gestures for them to follow, moving towards the Hokage Tower. Sasuke and Naruto exchange a look, grasp hands and then follow.

Sasuke is worried.

Their fate is about to be decided.


Sarutobi Hiruzen had been well aware that the Uchiha boy and Naruto were courting almost as soon as Naruto-kun moved into the Uchiha compound. It had taken a few weeks for him to accept that the two boys' commitment to each other was genuine and not just a phase they were going through brought on by loneliness. It was surprising that such young boys were able to make up their minds about each other so quickly, but he had accepted it, because he had no wish to see that new-found happiness in their eyes fade.

Those two boys truly deserve their happiness.

And here is the root of the problem, Hiruzen thinks. They deserve each other, and have the right to choose their lovers as they want... but Naruto is an Uchiha. His student's student had been secretly dating Uchiha Kushina, Sasuke-kun's mother's disowned sister. He hadn't even considered that very old piece of information until the moment that Naruto had turned from the defeated Nidaime to stare at him with fully evolved sharingan eyes.

Naruto-kun and Sasuke-kun are cousins. First cousins. And both of them apparently know this; know, and don't care. Hiruzen isn't sure what to do, a first for him for quite some time. There are separate clan laws for cases of... incest, because although that word leaves a bitter taste in his mouth, he knows that is what it is. He's unsure about the Uchiha clan's views on such matters were and doesn't really want to go digging through the old records to find out. Not only does he not want to know, he doesn't want someone else - like Danzo - to find out Naruto is an Uchiha, either, especially not by bringing the old man's attentions to those records.

He hasn't told anyone about the situation, not even those who should ostensibly be informed, like his advisers. He knows they wouldn't approve, and he isn't sure he would be able to blame them for that. He isn't sure he approves, despite knowing how happy the two boys are together.

The only thing good about the situation is that they're both boys and thus neither will be able to bear children. It's not proven that first cousin relations are more likely to have mentally or physically handicapped children, but among people with bloodline abilities, you can never know how the genes will react. Either way though, that point is moot and one less thing to worry about.

He knows he's not looking at things objectively, knows that his relationship with Naruto is coloring his view of this, but isn't sure if he cares. So few things have gone in that boy's favor, and although that apparently hasn't worked against him - just look at the way he fought the Nidaime! - Hiruzen isn't sure if the boy would be able to take being separated from his lover.

And that's another catch in this: Hiruzen doesn't think he'll be able to separate the two, the way things are now. He looks down at his paralyzed arms, considering all the jutsu he's lost. He's sure one of the Sannin would be able to defeat the boy, should it come to that, but he doubts they'd be able to escape without major injuries (he does realize that he might be deluding himself on that point, to make himself feel better about Naruto being so strong. He has to believe that if the Kyuubi suborns Naruto's body, someone will be able to mitigate the damage).

It seems like he never did have to choose whether to accept this arrangement or not, after all. They can't afford to lose a fighter as good as Naruto because Hiruzen might disapprove of something that doesn't harm anyone. (At least he hopes it isn't harming anyone.)

Naruto had seemed so scared when he realized that Hiruzen had seen his sharingan before he'd deactivated it, so scared that he would be condemned, and Hiruzen had looked into those sky blue eyes in the genius boy's face and seen both a competent shinobi and a child.

He considers his arms again and is very happy he has such a handy excuse to avoid making a decision he doesn't want to.

The door opens and one of his personal ANBU lead the two boys into the room. He waves the ANBU off and signals for his other guards to leave the area. He knows that Sasuke and Naruto don't want anyone to know that they're related. He's not sure if it's because they're afraid news will reach Itachi, or if Naruto doesn't want to be ostracized even more, taking his cousin with him.

"Sasuke-kun, Naruto-kun." He looks at the pair and he can't seem to drum up a feeling of disappointment or disgust. He loves Naruto like a grandson, how could he disapprove of Naruto finding love? It's just not possible.

"Sandaime-sama," Sasuke bows his head.

Naruto takes his usual approach, though a bit more restrained, "Hiya, Hiruzen-jii-san." He looks like he wants to duck his head in shame, but holds it high, rebellion in his father's blue eyes.

"So, you are cousins." Hiruzen starts, "You know that your mothers were sisters, correct?"

Naruto nods, "Yeah. I-" The blond boy shakes his head, "When I found out that I was half Uchiha, I couldn't stay away, not really."

"How long have you known?" He asks the boy. He wants to know if Naruto knew they were related before they'd gotten together in a romantic sense.

Sasuke finally looks up, "Hokage-sama, please," the boy is desperate and Hiruzen feels bad about scaring him. His guilt isn't about to make him act impetuously though. His guilt has never made him act impetuously. "Please don't take Naruto from me."

"When," Hiruzen repeats, "-did you find out you were Uchiha, Naruto-kun?"

Naruto bites his bottom lip, "I was eight."

Ah. And that would explain why Naruto 'failed' three genin exams. He was obviously manipulating Konoha's shinobi training to remain with his only living cousin after the massacre (the only cousin he would claim after all, Itachi is the only other one he has, and Itachi was the one to take the rest of Naruto's family away). Who he's evidently fallen in love with.

"Sasuke-kun," Hiruzen turns to the public Uchiha, "Who approached who in concerns of this relationship?" Naruto loves Sasuke far too much to let the other boy take any blame so Hiruzen has to ask Sasuke this question. Naruto would lie to even the Hokage to protect Sasuke.

Sasuke blushes, "Naruto approached me," He tells the truth and Hiruzen doesn't know if that means that Sasuke thinks Naruto is strong enough to protect himself from the consequence or if he isn't as protective of Naruto as he is of Sasuke.

"Hiru-jiji?" Naruto's voice is very soft (like he was three years old again) and it sounds almost like he's begging, "Are you going to take him away? I didn't mean to-" He breaks off and turns to stare at Sasuke, "-I didn't mean to anger you by telling Sasuke. I just couldn't work beside him every day without him knowing about it."

If there's one thing that Hiruzen knows for sure at this moment, it's that Naruto loves Sasuke. When Sasuke returns the look, Hiruzen knows that Sasuke also loves Naruto.

He can't separate them. It hurts his heart too much to consider taking someone Naruto loves away from him. But there has to be stipulations. Konoha needs to be strong and that means that he has to be strong. And that means that he sometimes has to do things that he finds reprehensible.

Like what he's about to do.

"I won't separate you, Naruto, Sasuke." The boys light up, impossibly bright and Hiruzen doesn't want to dampen their spirits, but he must. "You may remain together - if Sasuke-kun is willing to father a child in the future to insure the survival of his clan."

Sasuke glances towards him only for a moment and there is an unexpected question of Hiruzen's sanity in his eyes, "Of course I will insure the continuation of my line, Hokage-sama." His eyes turn back to Naruto, "Have no worry about that." He blushes, "Not now, not for a while, but yes. Yes, I will have children."

Well. At least Sasuke has actually thought this relationship through. And he's most likely discussed it with Naruto because Naruto doesn't look jealous to know that Sasuke will be having sex with a woman some time in the future, that Sasuke will be cheating on him in the future. From the look that Naruto is giving Sasuke though, he doesn't consider fathering children to be cheating or a betrayal of their relationship.

Proud of his pseudo grandson's maturity, Hiruzen smiles, "I'm glad to hear that, Sasuke-kun, Naruto."

As the boys turn, hands still clasped together, Hiruzen stops them, "Wait another moment please," Naruto looks to him with curiosity and Hiruzen smiles, "Do you really think that after such a battle that you, that all of us have been through that I would be able to hide either of your abilities? While I'm pleased that you have that much faith in me, far too many people saw what you are capable of, Naruto."

Naruto frowns and cocks his head to the side, "What do you mean, Hiruzen-jiji?"

Hiruzen chuckles, bemused, "I mean: congratulations of your promotions to chuunin, Uchiha Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke."


"Hey, Naruto," Shikamaru murmurs when Naruto flops down beside him on the grass.

"Shika." Naruto lounges silently for a moment and Shikamaru doesn't want to disturb the boy. Naruto might be young, might be chuunin like him, but Shikamaru has heard the reports of Naruto's defeat of the Nidaime, of how he'd managed to keep the Sandaime's fight with Orochimaru (Sannin no Orochimaru!) evenly weighted. Orochimaru, the resurrected Shodai, and the resurrected Nidaime verses Sandaime-sama and Naruto.

He knows that Naruto is ludicrously strong, has known for a while, but hadn't thought his strength had rose to such heights that it apparently has. If he's done the math correctly, Shikamaru suspects that Naruto is as strong as a Kage plus about half a Sannin. Shikamaru doesn't want to keep thinking about Naruto's monstrous strength though (it's troublesome in several ways), so as he shoves the thought from his mind, Sasuke's dilemma floats up, unbidden, to replace it.

Damn. Shikamaru glances warily to Naruto and figures that he hasn't been told yet that Sasuke had been a victim of a seduction genjutsu. He's sure that if Naruto knew, there would be little pieces of Kabuto scattered around Konoha for the scavengers to pick at.

Finally, he can't take the silence anymore (maybe because Naruto isn't known for silence, or maybe because his head is too full, he doesn't know really), "Congrats Naruto."

"Hmm?" Naruto smiles at him in a confused manner and Shikamaru shrugs a shoulder lazily.

"Congrats on defeating the Nidaime. And helping Sandaime-sama live through the battle. And, of course, making chuunin."

Naruto's hand comes up behind his head and ruffles his hair, smiling widely, "Thanks Shika. Congrats yourself for making chuunin."

He looks embarrassed, and it's not really a look that Shikamaru is used to seeing on the blond. He knows that he has to tell Naruto about Sasuke. It's picking at his brain, insisting to be mentioned.

"Hey, Naruto," Naruto looks at him in question and Shikamaru sniffs lazily, shrugging a shoulder in false nonchalance, "I know something that I should tell you."

Naruto frowns, "What's up? It's gotta be pretty important for you to speak about."

"So," Shikamaru sighs, debating about how to tell this to the blond. It would be far to troublesome if Naruto got angry and started yelling and hunting Kabuto down, but Shikamaru doesn't really feel the need to candy-coat what went down. "When you were separated from Sasuke, he stumbled over me one night and he was really out of it." Naruto is watching him with a keen eye, "Turned out that someone had used a genjutsu on him outside of sparring."

Naruto's voice gets very low and growly, "What kind of genjutsu?"

"A seduction one."

Shikamaru flinches away when Naruto emotes enough killing intent to kill small children and animals through fear and shock alone.

"Who?" Naruto queries in a voice Shikamaru's never heard before. Not that Shikamaru is very surprised by this behavior. The teenager has just found out that his lover was assaulted, so it's really to be expected.

He looks at Naruto blankly, not showing how concerned he really is, "Sasuke didn't tell you?"

"No." Naruto snarls, "Tell me who did that to him."

Shikamaru sighs and shakes his head. "Troublesome," He mutters. Sasuke could have at least been man enough to be the one to tell Naruto about it. "Yakushi Kabuto. Genin specializing in med. He was adopted by the chief medical officer of the Medical Unit."

It may have been troublesome to have found out that Sasuke had been assaulted, and it may have been troublesome to be dragged into someone else's life, but he was as curious and as thorough as his father had showed him how to be. Thus, he had a lot of information that could be useful to Naruto.

"What else?" Naruto stares at him with a bloodthirsty glimmer to his blue eyes and Shikamaru imagines for a moment that he sees vague streaks of red in them. He couldn't have though, so he dismisses that thought from his conscious mind.

"He failed the genin exam eight times in the last four years. He's nineteen years old. His blood type is AB and he's been missing from the village since the invasion."

Not that Naruto probably cared what Yakushi's blood type is, but Shikamaru considers it information and any information is good information to have.

Naruto snaps his head to the side, face sharp, "Missing?"

"Yep. No one knows where he is. No body though." Shikamaru falls back onto the grass and looks at the clouds. Clouds are so uncomplicated. Just a visible mass of droplets of water or frozen crystals suspended in the atmosphere. Nothing very troublesome at all.

"So, he's a possible Sound-nin."

"Yep." Given, Yakushi was a possible many-things; but Shikamaru isn't going to point that out. He's sure that Naruto knows that already and Shikamaru isn't one to say superfluous things. Obviously Yakushi could possibly be a great many different things, but one of the more likely of those things is indeed a Sound-nin.

Naruto growls in a satisfied manner, "Perfect. Then when we hunt down Orochimaru, we'll most likely find Kabuto. And I'll be able to kill him."

Shikamaru blinks in agreement and continues to stare at the clouds.


Both of them are as taunt as bowstrings as they sit, stunned, at the dango store counter. They'd come for dango because it was something neither of them were known for liking, and they'd wanted to go unrecognized by the fan club (and everyone else who could possibly be interested in them).

They certainly hadn't expected to find that the Dango Palace, where they had chose to go for a snack, to be the regular haunt of tokubetsu jounin.

"So you're saying that Kakashi-kun was told the council was debating his gay boi's again?" The purple-haired woman from the exam, Mitarashi, leans back in her chair, talking to another of the jounin they'd meet at the exam, Shiranui.

"Yeah," Shiranui shrugs, the senbon in his mouth twirling, "Poor kids. Council's decided that if they can't separate the boys, they wanna get Kakashi to encourage the Uchiha's dominance over Uzumaki. They think the sharingan will help control the...boy in case he goes crazy." He says 'boy' like he wants to say 'monster'.

Sasuke stares at Naruto in wide-eyed horror for several moments before his face clears and his eyes shutter. It only takes Naruto two seconds to come up with a rough plan, and less than a second to convey that he has a plan to Sasuke. Sasuke nods to him, indicating that he'll follow along with whatever it is that Naruto's come up with.

So Naruto stands, making a bit of noise to call the attention of the two tokubetsu jounin to them, and holds a hand out for Sasuke to take. His expression is one of caring with subtle hints of command to it. Enough for betsu-jou to see, should they be looking.

Sasuke smiles daintily and takes Naruto's hand, letting his cousin pull him gently up from his seat. He's obviously already caught on somewhat.

"Thank you, Naruto," Sasuke murmurs and Naruto wraps a possessive arm around his cousin's shoulders.

If the council wants Sasuke to be the dominant one in the relationship, they're about to find out that it's completely opposite to their wishes.


They speed back to the compound, locking themselves in Sasuke's bedroom and sitting down to talk. This is more than a little upsetting to Sasuke. The council is once again trying to hurt the only family he has left; is once again trying to make Naruto miserable for their own selfish reasons. So they look each other in the eye, and they plot.

It's amazing how much they've gotten to know each other these past months; Sasuke has no trouble at all understanding the basics of Naruto's plan even before his cousin tells him. Naruto looks uncertain, though, like he's half-expecting Sasuke to protest or get angry, and it frustrating Sasuke that Naruto still doesn't seem completely sure of his love for him. That he's still expecting rejection, in some corner of his mind.

So when Naruto is finished outlining the plan, Sasuke adds, "It's not going to be enough to just have me be the submissive one in the relationship; there has to be no doubts whatsoever about my being the uke." And so he shows Naruto, without the explicit statement, that he is prepared to go as far as they need to for this.

He frowns and adds, "I'm not sure how much we can trust Kakashi, honestly-" because he's not, and that hurts. Their teacher didn't fight for them until he understood that it was absolutely no way for them to live separated; maybe Kakashi will consider Sasuke controlling Naruto a 'fair compromise', or some such. Sasuke isn't willing to take the risk that their teacher may be trustworthy if it turns out that he's really not.

Naruto nods, grimacing but obviously agreeing.

"Do you even know how to act submissive, Sasuke?" He asks after a pause, a bit of humor creeping into his tone. The way Naruto manages to keep his mood up, almost no matter what, is quite amazing and Sasuke doesn't doubt that it takes a lot of strength for him to do so. Strength and will. How the council can so utterly miss that their revered Will of Fire burns brighter in Naruto than anyone else, he doesn't understand.

"I suppose I'll simply have to let you lead me," Sasuke answers, smirking. He's not quite comfortable with playing submissive or being known as submissive; but in the end, there is very little he won't do for his cousin. And it's really just a continuation of the prank, since no matter what anyone else thinks, the two of them will know that truth.

And it's not like he's ever really cared what people thought about him anyway. (This thaws some of the unacknowledged nervousness in his stomach.)

"You'll have to fool Kakashi well enough that he considers you for an evaluation," Naruto continues thoughtfully. Sasuke blinks and then realizes the truth of that statement. Without an evaluation, it would just be Kakashi's word against another's - this has to be official.

Sasuke grimaces a little, considering that.

"Who is usually called on for evaluations?"

Naruto's faces twists, he drags a hand through his hair and then looks up with his lips upturned in grim amusement.

"Yamanaka Inoichi."

Sasuke stares. He's going to have to practice for this. A lot.


Kakashi lounges in the tree, reading a non-porny book disguised in an Icha Icha cover. Not that he wouldn't love to be reading some porn right now, given that its been weeks since he'd last read anything, but no. No, he is instead supervising his two new chuunin during their training.

Not that Naruto apparently needs training.

Because, holy shit. Naruto went up against the Nidaime and fucking won. Holy Shit.

No, it was more along the lines of Kakashi not wanting the boys to get to... frisky, while they spar. And they need the practice even if they are amazingly good. There is more to fighting than power, after all.

He wanders a lazy eye over Sasuke's form and can see where Naruto is influencing everything in his life because the fast taijutsu that he'd taught the teen before the invasion now has a distinctly animalistic tint to it.

Abruptly, Naruto grabs Sasuke by the waist and buries his nose in Sasuke's neck. Sasuke arches into him and Kakashi clears his throat.

They're allowed to be together again, but he's - somewhat desperately - hoping the boys learn a little discretion.

Naruto glares at him for a moment before grinning widely and taking Sasuke's hand. He starts towards Kakashi and Sasuke mutters, "No, Naruto, come on, we don't have to-"

"Come on, Sasuke," Naruto's voice has a bit more command in it then usual and Kakashi cocks his head to the side. This is new. Not surprising for some of their sexual relationship to bleed into the rest of their life though, so he's not too worried.

Sasuke capitulates and allows himself to be dragged over to Kakashi.

Before Naruto can say anything, Jiraiya appears with a bamph of smoke and a long, loud introduction. Sasuke and Naruto just sort of look at him, like they aren't impressed. Kakashi grins.

"Jiraiya-sama~!" He sings out, allowing himself to roll off the tree branch and drop to the ground. He hits the grass in a crouch and stands quickly with a small twirl, "It's so good to see you!"

Naruto looks taken aback for a moment then a sly smile overtakes his previous grin, "Eh? Kakashi-sensei's gay for Jiraiya-ero?"

Kakashi rears back, visible (and covered) eye wide, "NO! No, Naruto, I'm not 'gay for Jiraiya'."

Naruto doesn't look convinced and even Sasuke and Jiraiya are looking at him funnily, "Doesn't look that way to me, being all excited and shit when he shows up."

Kakashi rolls his eyes. Only Naruto would think that his excitement is because he's gay. He's heard that a lot of gay people saw gayness where there wasn't any because they were looking for it. "I'm excited because Jiraiya-sama writes Icha Icha."

Then it's Naruto's turn to roll his eyes and he tugs on Sasuke's hand, "Come on, Sasuke, let's leave Kakashi-sensei to his not-gay enthusiasm about being around Jiraiya-ero."

Sasuke doesn't look like he wants to leave but when he tries to stay where he is, Naruto sort of glares at him and lowers his voice, "Come on, Sasuke."

The Uchiha boy bites his lip and moves to follow his lover.

"Wait up, there, Naruto," Jiraiya holds up a hand, "I have something that concerns you."

"Like what?"

Jiraiya smirks, "We have a mission."

Kakashi blinks. If there was a mission for his team he should have been the first to know about it. He doesn't like anyone, even Jiraiya, interfering with his team.

"Really?" He's not questioning Jiraiya (as if he had any right to!) but he is worried. Why is his team being split up?

"Oh," Jiraiya speaks with large movements and impressive hand gestures, "-it's just a mission for Naruto and myself. Well, Hiruzen-sensei thought I might like to take Naruto with me, really."

Kakashi knows why Jiraiya is interested in Naruto, because it's just like the original reason Kakashi was interested until he'd had come to like Naruto for himself instead of as his sensei's son.

But he doesn't know if Naruto knows why Jiraiya is interested. It doesn't seem like something that Sarutobi would discuss with the boy.

Naruto's face scrunches up and he looks Jiraiya up and down for a moment. "Yeah, no thanks, ero-sennin." He scoffs, "I'm not a sub and I'm not looking for a dom. And if I was, I'd be more likely to go after Kakashi-sensei."

Kakashi... doesn't really know how to respond to the fact that he apparently has qualities that Naruto... likes.

A sound that is frighteningly familiar to ruffled feathers comes from Sasuke and the Uchiha stares at Naruto, "Naruto," he hisses, "What are you doing?"

"Aw, Baby," Naruto puts a possessive arm around Sasuke, "You know that you wouldn't argue with me too much about taking a lover."

Sasuke continues to stare at Naruto for a moment before bowing his head, "I guess not, Naruto."

That... is a little more than usual 'uke' behavior, Kakashi thinks to himself. That's more submissive behavior and Kakashi has to wonder when Naruto and Sasuke evolved their relationship that far. If that is indeed what it is.

Jiraiya smirks, "Boy, I don't want you in my bed. I'd prefer a gorgeous set of red-head twins. No, this is just a retrieval mission. We're going to get Senju Tsunade."

Kakashi latches onto the name and cuts a discerning look at the Sannin in front of him. "Jiraiya-sama?"

Jiraiya's smile is almost too large for his face, "Hiruzen-sensei wants her to take over for him."

Butting in, Naruto is all belligerence, "I'm not going unless Sasuke comes with me."

Is it Kakashi's imagination, or is Sasuke blushing? It's tiny, but it's there. How strange.

Ah well. To the matter at hand. "Naruto-"

"Sure!" Jiraiya boasts grandly, throwing his arms wide, "Of course he can come. We won't be gone for very long."

"Now, wait a minute," Kakashi raises a hand, "Sasuke and Naruto are on my team-"

"And the Hokage told me that I could take anyone I wanted with me," Jiraiya's tone holds no more warning than a parent telling off a toddler and Kakashi feels a little abashed at his behavior. It's not his place to be questioning or refusing Jiraiya. There are very few people that outrank Kakashi, but Jiraiya is one of them.

"Of course, Jiraiya-sama," Kakashi bows his head.

Naruto cheers and hugs Sasuke to him, lifting him a little and spinning around. Sasuke is still blushing and Naruto finally puts him down. "Awesome! So, when do we leave?"

Kakashi doesn't know what the feeling in his chest is, but he can imagine that it's something that parents feel when their children move out.

Naruto and Sasuke are moving on to a different teacher. Not forever, he knows that, but still. They're going to have someone else to lean on now.

"Meet me at the South Gate tomorrow at eleven," Jiraiya tells the boys, "Pack light and bring money."

"Mmm?" Naruto cocks his head to the side and Jiraiya laughs boisterously.

"We'll be doing a lot of gambling over the next week or so. Tsunade-hime likes her gambling."

The boys nod again before rushing off together.

Kakashi supposes that if the kids are leaving, he might as well be magnanimous because they will be coming back to him. So he offers one warning before leaping away with a grin stretching his mouth wide under his mask.

Beware inappropriate displays of affection.


Jiraiya blinks as he wakes up. He doesn't know what woke him up, but whatever it was, it's happening inside the small camp the three shinobi had set up. He rolls to his side to check on Naruto and Sasuke to see if anything's happened and frowns when he sees the boys sitting at the campfire.

Now, he understands that the pair of them are a couple and he remembers the vague warnings about PDA's that Kakashi had given him before he'd left Konoha, but he's still not sure what's going on.

"Does anyone other than Sarutobi-sama know?" Sasuke's quiet voice says and Jiraiya perks up. He wants to know what they're talking about if it involves his sensei.

"No, he was the only one that saw when I fought that old dude with white hair, the one that Orochimaru brought back from the dead." Naruto's voice is just as quiet as Sasuke's.

Wait, were they talking about what Hiruzen-sensei had told him? About Naruto going toe to toe with the Nidaime?

It seems they are.

"Are you sure that he won't change his mind? Is... is he going to separate us when we get back...?" Sasuke sounds scared as he trails off and Jiraiya is more than a little shocked. An Uchiha? Scared? (Or rather: An Uchiha, showing that he's scared?)

"Come here," Naruto pulls Sasuke into his arms and Jiraiya rolls his eyes when the boy nuzzles at Sasuke's neck, "No one can take you from me. You know that. We didn't let the council break us apart, we aren't going to let Hiruzen-jiji do it either. Besides, Hiruzen-jiji said it was okay and he doesn't lie to me."

Sasuke sighs and Jiraiya's mouth quirks up into a sly grin. After hearing that Naruto can take on a Hokage - even one that had been dead for a while - he knows that no one is going to be taking anything away from the blond without a huge fight. One that Naruto will probably win.

"Naruto-" Sasuke breathes the name out and Jiraiya frowns. What is he..?

"I don't like this on you," Naruto's growl is muffled, "I don't like this seal on you," He says again, "You're mine, not his."

Sasuke snorts, "Then prove it to me."

Sasuke is an arrogant little bastard, Jiraiya thinks with some amusement.

Naruto pulls the Uchiha to the ground, straddling his hips, "You," He bites the boy's neck, "Are," His collarbone, "Mine." Sasuke's shirt is pulled up over his head and Naruto nuzzles the thin teenager's chest over his heart.

Sasuke yelps, then giggles. "N-Naruto!" His hiss is as quiet as he can make it, but it still would have woken Jiraiya up if he hadn't already been awake, "You're going to wake him up!"

"Don't care. I don't care if he sees..." Naruto licks the naked neck and Jiraiya decides that now is a good time to roll back over and pretend that he's not listening. "I want you here, with me, forever. I've claimed you, Sasuke."

Sasuke sighs and there is the sound of clothing ruffling and Jiraiya realizes what Kakashi meant about 'inappropriate displays of affection', because dear gods, they're going to have sex; while he is lying right here, not ten feet from them.

And Naruto didn't seem to care about that.

Jiraiya is straight, thank you very much. Yes, he likes girl-on-girl as much as the next heterosexual man, but he's never, never thought about two guys getting it on. At least, not seriously.

There is a growl - from who, he doesn't know - and then a shuffle, another yelp, then a sigh and a half giggle.

He is not listening to this all night. He is not going to listen to this for the entire trip. Gods, no.

So he channels chakra to his ears. Instead of opening his ear canals and enhancing his ability to hear things, he shields them. A nice, easy solution.

Not one that he can continue to employ after tonight, given the dangers surrounding the boys, but one that will work for one night. He's just going to have to tire them out with training tomorrow so they have no energy for this kind of stuff later on.

Naruto will enjoy learning his father's technique, he thinks, the Rasengan. That's fairly tiring. And he knows that the Uchiha likes flashy jutsu, so maybe he'll have to steal Kakashi's Chidori and teach him that, if he doesn't already know it.

At least he'll be able to sleep then.


Naruto preens in front of the mirror, patting and pushing at his new- attributes. The only reason that he looks like this now is because Jiraiya is out.

Not really a surprise that Jiraiya is out - Sasuke has noticed that the man isn't really one to hang around, especially in a town containing either gambling halls or hookers. (Sasuke can't blame the gambling halls for dragging their new "teacher" away because apparently this Tsunade that they're looking for is supposed to frequent them. A lot.)

"Naruto?" Sasuke leans on his elbow, looking at the blonde bombshell wearing a frighteningly skin baring yellow and orange and blue kimono. "What are you doing?" Sasuke has seen Naruto's regular Oiroki no Jutsu and this for is different. Her cheeks aren't marked and her hair is more honey blonde than sun blonde and it's not in pigtails. She looks to be about the same size... clothing-wise though.

"Well," the strange woman in Sasuke's room replies huskily, "We have to blend in, right? We don't want whatever is left of Orochimaru knowing that we're looking for, or that we've found, Tsunade." She spins gaily, whipping her long hair from her face. "This is the perfect cover!"

If he weren't related to the blonde, Sasuke is pretty sure that he'd be all over her right now. Thankfully his hormones are censored by his morality, so he doesn't find his now devastatingly sultry cousin a walking sex symbol.

Or. Well. He does, he just doesn't react like he does.

"Okay, so I'm escorting a-" Sasuke pauses here and then smirks at his cousin, "-lady of leisure to the bars and casinos?"

"Oh, Darling," Naruto giggles behind her hand, blue eyes twinkling. Sasuke is pretty sure that her eyes are blue. They seem to be flashing between blue and green when he really looks close, "No, no, you're going to join me in a body of the female persuasion." Naruto's feminine face lights up and he bites his lip winningly.

It takes a moment for what Naruto means to actually get through to Sasuke.

"What?" It's not really an exclamation, more of a confused and irritated snarl, and Sasuke sits upright on the bed, "Naruto-"

He - though Sasuke is going to have to start thinking in female pronouns because Naruto very rarely doesn't get his... her way - hunches her shoulders and the movement bunches up her very generous bosom and Sasuke pulls his gaze back up to her face.

"Darling, we can't be known as Konoha shinobi." Naruto saunters seductively to Sasuke and drops to her knees in front of him, "Not even Itachi can see through this jutsu." She juts out her slender jaw and trails her long fingers over his thighs.

"Naruto," Sasuke leans backwards, pulling his head back enough to glare down at his cousin, "Seriously?"

"No one is going to be looking for a couple of hot chicks, are they?" Naruto slides from her knees to her ass, leaning against Sasuke and fluttering her eyelashes, "And really, if we happen to come across Jiraiya while we're girls? Even better!"

"So," Sasuke considers Naruto's plan closely, trying to find a down side. Obviously he'll have to play a girl, but really, what's playing a girl when he's pretending to be his cousin's lover? That won't be nearly as much of a problem. "You look like pure porn, how am I supposed to look?" He finally asks, a smirk twisting his lips up.

Naruto breaks out into the biggest grin Sasuke has seen in a long time and she claps her hands excitedly, "Oh! Oh, Darling! That's so perfect!" She tosses her long, light blonde curls over her shoulder and makes a pouting sex face, "If I'm going to be porn, you will be erotica."

Well, Sasuke thinks with a mental shrug, at least he can be demure and hide and blush when Naruto's mouth runs away with her. Naruto's much better suited to be 'porn' anyway, what with her bust size and miles of tanned golden leg. Being 'erotica' will let him wear a lot more clothing too, which is nice because he's not one to be flashing people left, right, and centre.

He stands up and steps around Naruto before bring his hands up into the modified ram seal that Naruto had shown him. He focuses on Naruto's particular chakra patterns when doing his Oiroke no Jutsu and with a the smallest puff of smoke, feels his body change.

He may have previously told Jiraiya that he knew the Oiroke, but he's never done it before.

Long arms encircle his waist, a chin rests on his shoulder, and he looks towards the full length mirror with trepidation.

Looking back at him are two women. One, already having been dubbed porn, with her arms around a brunette's waist. Sasuke's own dark hair is just brushing her shoulders and her eyes are so large that Sasuke isn't sure that she looks quiet sixteen yet. Her cheeks are pale and just looking at Naruto pressed up against her female form makes Sasuke blush.

It's quiet a pretty blush, when he actually lets himself think about it.

"Ready to go out on the town?" Naruto practically moans into her ear and Sasuke blushes deeper, knowing that if she'd have been male there most definitely been a physical reaction to that voice.

"What about names?" Sasuke whispers, looking over her shoulder shyly.

"Do we really need names, Baby?" Naruto kisses her cheek, leaving behind a party pink lip outline.

Sasuke licks her lips and nibbles on her bottom lip, "I- I guess not," she looks at Naruto from beneath her eyelashes, "Darling."

Naruto breaks character to cackle for a moment before composing herself and taking Sasuke by the hand and leading her out of the hotel, towards the first of many gambling establishments.


Waiting for the sake to take to Tsunade again, Shizune leans against the counter with a sigh. A sudden commotion near the doors catches her attention and she looks over. For a moment she can't see much other than gathered bodies, and then a seemingly miraculous corridor between her and the doors open and she notices what's caught everyone attention.

However gay she isn't, Shizune can most certainly tell a beautiful woman. The fact that there are two? Cuddling together and laughing and giving each other tender touches? She can see how that would cause a distraction.

The yelling of her shishou calls her attention back to the sake that the waiter is holding limply as he stares at the blonde and brunette, eyes glazed over.

Taking advantage of the women's presence, Shizune absconds with the sake without paying for it - not that she has much money left with how Tsunade is gambling today. Besides, she's a ninja, isn't she? - and starts back over to the craps table to hand the alcohol over.

"Shizune! Sake!" Tsunade pretty much bellows into her ear as she returns to the table and Shizune places the alcohol on the table by her elbow, pouring the first drink. Tsunade tosses the glass of liquid back like it was water and goes straight for the bottle.

Shizune just sighs. She shuffles her way off to the side of the room and makes a promise to keep an eye out on her shishou.

Noise causes her eyes to drift back towards the bar and she can see the two women - though barely legal age - cuddled together, the blonde's arm over the exotically pale woman's shoulders. The pale woman with dark eyes has one hand around the buxom woman's waist, her fingers stretching just to reach inside the first fold of the far too open kimono on her lover.

And they are lovers because they can't possibly be anything else.

Damn, Shizune shakes her head, what she wouldn't give to be that well endowed and 'perky'. It doesn't really matter to the medic that she knows how many problems come with being that top heavy (back pain, gropage, sagging, etc...) she still wouldn't mind having a little more to advertize.

The blonde looks up suddenly, catching her eye. The blue - maybe a little green - eyes twinkle at her and the taller of the lovers, of the lesbians, leans down to whisper in the pale woman's ear.

The exotic - and erotic - woman looks towards her and then her eyes get a shine to them as well. She licks her lips and kisses the fingers on one of the blonde's hands and blushes as she whispers back.

Shizune is morbidly curious to what they're talking about.

Looks like she's going to find out though, because they've started moving in her direction, their eyes pinning her where she stands.

"Hello," The blonde smiles at her winningly, bouncing on her toes. It does fascinating things to her breasts and if Shizune had been a lesbian, she would have been very distracted. About as distracted as the blonde's lover is.

The brunette blushes and turns her smoky eyes from her lover's assets, to Shizune, "We, um, noticed you," she murmurs in a soft voice, "-over here, looking... comfortable."

Shizune frowns internally, not wanting to offend the women. "Really?" She asks, wondering what these impossibly beautiful women want with her.

The blonde lights up and she nods enthusiastically, "Yes! We thought that maybe, because we're so new at this," she strokes her lover's side with a possessive hand, "-we could get some pointers from someone with more experience!"

It doesn't take more than a nano-second for Shizune to realize what the blonde is talking about.

"I'm sorry," she leans in to the couple a little bit, "-but I'm not gay." She feels bad about turning the two away, but she hasn't got any experience with lesbianism, so she can't help the couple.

The thought makes her pause then. Wait- was she just invited to an all-girl threesome?

Shizune is pretty sure that things like that only happen in books and the thought of being pretty enough to catch these women's attention is very ego boosting.

"Oh!" Blonde giggles, covering her mouth with her hand, "How about gambling then?" She wiggles her eyebrows and Shizune blinks, not quite comprehending what she means.

Then it hits her. She's read something like this in one of her shishou's teammate's books (which she'll never admit to reading). It's rather shocking to find those books good for something other than causing nosebleeds. The blonde is asking to put her sexuality up for a bid and if she looses, she owes them a threesome.

Absently she wonders what she would get if she won.

"Ahh, I'm, uhm, not really a gambler," She mutters, ducking her face away. She would have been perfectly happy with ending the awkward encounter there, but then Tsunade starts waving a maniac hand in the air.

"Shizune! Sake!"

Shizune blushes and edges away from the predator-ish blonde, "I apologize but please, excuse me," she finally gets around them and hurries her way to her shishou.

"Well! Obviously she's going to take her offer over ours!" The blonde doesn't seem put out or angry, so Shizune is thankful that she hasn't insulted the women.

(Though, she has to wonder why the blonde would consider Tsunade's 'offer' better than theirs. There's two of them and the blonde is at least as large as her shishou. If she was a lesbian, two would absolutely win over one. Unless she was in love. Which she's not.)


Sasuke sighs a little, leaning back on Naruto's shoulder. "How are we ever going to learn how to gamble if anyone with experience refuses to teach us?" She'd been so sure that the girl, Tsunade's assistant, would agree to teach them. They are rather irresistible, after all.

And given the despairing looks that Tsunade is getting from her assistant, they are sure that the woman knows how to gamble.

"I suppose that we could just not do what Tsunade's doing," Naruto muses, running her slender hand up Sasuke's side, giving Sasuke a set of shivers. She finally nods.

"Sure, Darling." It's not technically a bad plan, and Naruto has always been very good at off-the-cuff plans.

Besides, they had a lot of money for Naruto to learn with.


Again, we'd love to hear what kind of summary you guys would give IR :D