Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
Not Quite Romeo and Juliet (Or: Why Hugo Weasley Obviously has a Death Wish)
By Silver Sailor Ganymede
"Scorpius, I just wanted to let you know that telling my dad about us was the most amusing thing I've done in a very long time."
Hugo Weasley had just set foot on the Hogwarts Express, which was taking him back to Hogwarts to continue his fourth year now that the Christmas holidays were over. His travelling companion, one Scorpius Malfoy, shook his head in exasperation and grinned.
"You really are incorrigible, Hugo, you know that?"
"Of course I do," Hugo replied, pulling a stash of chocolate frogs out of his bag now that they were out of sight of the station. "Sweets?"
"No thank you," Scorpius said. "So tell me, how exactly did your father react to hearing that one of your best friends happens to be the son of one of his old arch rivals?"
"Like I said, it was brilliant," Hugo mumbled through a mouthful of chocolate. "He hit the roof, then started shouting at me for not telling him sooner, then at Rose for not having noticed anything."
"Unsurprising. Gryffindors never do notice anything," Scorpius sighed. "So now your father knows that we've put an end to a two hundred and fifty year old blood feud."
"And what did your dad say about it?"
"Hugo, my father's a Slytherin. We actually notice things, in case you hadn't realised," Scorpius drawled in response. "Besides, anything that annoys Ron Weasley is a good thing as far as he's concerned."
"And there was me thinking the only way to end a blood feud was for the heirs of the two Houses to fall in love, elope and then commit suicide."
"No offence, Hugo, but I'd rather not marry your sister, let alone kill myself for her. You've been reading too much Shakespeare."
"Your dad would have a fit if he knew you'd been reading muggle books."
"Which is why he's not going to find out," Scorpius replied. "Now, as I was saying, I'm not going to marry Rose - and I don't think you'd want to marry me either, so the whole idea of marriage between our houses is not going to happen." Scorpius looked faintly horrified at the prospect. Hugo couldn't blame him; his sister was lovely sometimes, but most times she was exactly like their father – loud, lanky and as stereotypically Gryffindoras it was possible to get, with a bit of their mum's bossiness thrown in. A grin crept onto Hugo's face as a new idea struck him.
"It's a pity we're not going out," he sniggered. "If I'd said we were, dad wouldn't have just hit the roof; he'd have gone straight through it."
"Hugo, wonderful as that scenario seems, it would require us to a. be attracted to other men and b. to be in love with each other. Frankly that's about as likely to happen as Hagrid managing to breed flesh-eating flobberworms."
"He did that two years ago."
"Ok, fine, then it's about as likely as me proposing to your darling sister," Scorpius replied, shooting Hugo a murderous glare that would have made his grandfather proud. "Tell me, does your entire life centre around thinking up new ways of trying to get yourself disowned?"
"If dad was going to disown me then he would have done it when I got sorted into Slytherin," Hugo retorted. "You know that mum wouldn't let him do that anyway."
That was when the compartment door crashed open and to reveal a very irate looking Rose.
"Hugo Arthur Weasley," she snarled. "Why is my trunk full of flesh-eating flobberworms? And don't tell me it was James and Fred – I can tell your pranks when I see them."
"Oh hello, Rosie darling," Hugo said cheerfully. Rose continued to glare at him. Scorpius wondered if he had a death wish. "We were just discussing the fact that Scorpius wants to marry you. Would you care to join us?"
Rose cast a disbelieving look at Hugo then a disgusted one at Scorpius before storming off.
Hugo started to laugh.
"Weasley, if you're not careful then you'll end up renewing that blood feud."