This is based on the What If story where Jane Foster accidentally received Thor's powers instead of Don Blake. At the end of the story Odin grants Jane immortality, and proposes to her without a first date or anything! (yeah he is the universal pimp!) Thor meanwhile had hooked up with Sif, so Jane turns to Odin as he is something like Thor was anyways... yeah, creepy.

Chapter 1. Breaking the ice. (or ass)

Jane Foster gazed out at the breath-taking view before her. The impossibly vibrant lands rolling out greenly under a blindingly blue sky. The pristine towers across from the one she currently stood. The solid stone of the fortress that spoke of eternity. As the wind blew across her, lifting her long dark hair and billowing her rich green dress Jane wondered again at how she had become a part of all of this. Sometimes it all seemed so surreal. The archaic place, people, and culture constantly reminded her that this was not where she was from despite how comfortable she had become here.

Jane heard movement behind her and glanced back to see Odin walk out of their bedroom onto the balcony with her, his powerfully muscled chest bared, his sleeping pants of purest white silk. His soft white beard tickled at her as he leaned in to kiss her gently. His one eye gazed at her lovingly as he pushed a lock of hair aside to have a get a better look at her beautiful face in the morning sunlight. ''I bid you good morning, my love. Does this day find you well?''

Jane smiled back, resting a hand gently on his extended arm. ''Yes. How are you today, my dear?''

Odin's smile widened as he regarded his wife. ''I am most splendid. My rest was sound, as news of the exploits of my favored son reached mine ears last evening before I retired, leaving me in good mood.'' Odin beamed with pride. ''Thor ever proves himself capable of one day taking my place as sovereign of Asgard.''

Jane nodded to Odin, happy with his contentment, but knowing that something must be said, she took his hand in both of hers. ''Odin, we must talk. The words you use concerning Thor, while good in intent, are destructive in subtle ways.''

Odin's eye widened in surprise. ''Oh? In what way do you mean?''

Jane kept her smile on her face, a part of her wondering how she, Jane Foster; a nurse from New York, could ever remand the lord of all gods. ''While what you say is certainly good for building Thor's confidence, it also must have equal negative impact upon your other son, Loki. Loki is banished now, but I have seen you say such things when both your sons were present. It must nettle Loki to no end to hear you speak as if he is in no way favored.''

Odin's brow drew down at the mention of his other son. ''Loki hath done nothing deserving of my gratitude, thus I have not showered him with undue praise. His wickedness should only be met with scorn.''

Jane sighed. She had known this was going to be difficult. After all, Odin was All-father; he was understandably arrogant despite being a good person. ''This is true, but I'm saying this because I think you miss how hurt Loki is by what you say, and how that might in turn spur him on in his bitter rivalry with Thor.''

Odin waved his hand dismissively. ''Brothers must be rivals, it is the nature of things.''

Jane's brow furrowed as she spoke. ''Yes, but Loki's rivalry approaches hatred. You are more aware than most that he has committed rather serious crimes in attempts to do his brother real harm. That can't be a healthy sibling bond.''

Odin waved his hand again, as if trying to shove the matter aside. ''This is because Loki is evil in his thoughts, and does not aspire to nobler ideals as does his brother.''

Jane was growing upset now. She didn't want to know how long Odin has avoided this issue, but it was high time someone brought it up properly. ''No, Odin. His thoughts are those of a poor boy who has not received enough kind words from his father over the years to make him feel like he CAN aspire to your nobler ideals. He thinks himself inferior because you dote on Thor as you do, I can promise you that kindness on your part will have more effect than constant banishment.''

Odin stared at Jane, surprised at her anger. ''Loki is banished for treasonous behavior, I cannot allow such acts as his to go unpunished.''

Jane nodded. ''I did not say don't punish him; just don't banish him. All you are saying to him when you send him away like this is that he is unwanted, further compounding his feelings of being an outsider here.''

Odin gestured emphatically as he spoke. ''But he is my son! And I have shown him great kindness, in allowing him to return time and again to our realm to start anew. He tramples this act of faith each time of his own accord.''

Jane shook her head at Odin. ''No. He is your adopted son. That may not make a difference to you, but he feels it very acutely. It is one of the things that makes him more jealous of your affections to Thor, since they only concrete his feeling that Thor is your only REAL son. You allow him over and over, but you don't tell him that the reason you are letting him return is that you love him. He may suspect that you have fatherly feelings toward him, but can only hope it's true since you do nothing to validate that hope.''

Odin's brow drew down again in annoyance. ''We of Asgard are made of tougher stuff, if Loki is so thin skinned as you say then he still brings his plight upon himself, and needs toughen up.''

Jane's eyes flashed, jabbing a finger at her husband, and Odin found himself taking a step back despite the fact that he towered over her at several times her size. ''That kind of thinking is why you have this problem! No one else here is going to tell you this, that's why I took it on myself. I wasn't born until long after you adopted Loki as a child, but I can hazard a guess that you have always treated your sons the same way, haven't you?''

Odin was perplexed, he had not expected his wife's ire this morning. She had guessed correctly though and he was interested to hear what she had to say that no one in Asgard would. ''Yes, I have always rewarded and punished my sons in the same fashion.''

Jane nodded. ''Loki is simply not as powerful or talented in the the ways you esteem as Thor is. So from an early age he has watched from the background as Thor received your praise and he was seemingly forgotten. Then when he acted out in response to his resentment of that situation, you punished him. In a way, punishment is the only interaction Loki can get from you, so perhaps he will take what he can get.''

Odin had never been berated before, the feeling was new to him. She was right, no one else would have dared. She wasn't wrong though, the things she said had the ring of truth to them. Odin scratched his chin as he looked at her determined expression. ''If what you say rings true, what might still be done to correct our wayward son?''

Jane smiled at Odin, hugging the surprised lord tightly. This was one of the reasons she had come to deeply love Odin; even though no one had ever told him he was wrong before, he still reacted with timeless wisdom accepting the possibility that he could be. ''The first thing we should do is work together on how to change your reward system. If it has not worked for all this time, why leave things the same?''

Odin nodded sagely. ''There is wisdom to your words. Tell me then... how are we to rear Loki?''


Loki's sarcastic smile slid from his face like an avalanche, replaced by slack-jawed surprise. Odin had summoned him from the ethereal world he had been banished, as he always did. Loki counted on it these days; he would stay away for a while until Odin felt he had served enough time, then Odin would summon him back with some threats, and Loki would have another chance at making his plans to be rid of Thor and supplant his father a reality.

But what he saw this time he had not expected. Odin had taken a queen for himself; not entirely unheard of, but that queen he recognized. She was none other than Jane Foster, the mortal who had accidentally inherited Thor's powers for a time. She glowed Asgardian immortality and nodded to him as he regarded her, as if she was not in fact horribly out of place. Loki stammered, ''W-what is this!? You have taken a lowly mortal as wife? Her lifetime is but a drop in the well to our own, her blood impure!''

Odin frowned at Loki. ''Her blood is pure as any others. Her days are now as vast as our own, are you not happy that I have found a queen that pleases me?''

Loki scowled, raising one thin arm to shake a fist in the air near the long curving horns of his helmet. ''She is not deserving of the title, how could she be?!''

Odin's frown deepened. ''I, Odin, make that choice, not thou. Her ascension to the throne is not why you are here. By request of your new mother, I have decided to grant you pardon from your confinement on the astral realm.'' Jane cleared her throat at the finality of his comment and Odin caught himself. ''And... erm... welcome thee back, son.''

Loki reeled, his green eyes flitting back and forth between Odin and Jane. His mother? Never-mind the impossible concept that a mortal was not only now kin to him but his own mother, she had asked for Odin to release him... why? The tone of Odin's voice perplexed Loki as well, what was this strange inflection in him? Loki had never heard Odin speak to him in such a fashion... had this female somehow bewitched Odin? Loki shook his head. Impossible: it was Odin, after all; the All-father was not subject to charms. Loki merely grunted at the peculiar scene, and not wanting to debate this irritation any further he turned his back to them both and strode from the room.

Jane put a comforting hand on Odin's arm as Loki left, seeing how his eyes flashed. ''All children need time to cope with new parents, we can address his rudeness better when he is not on such shaky footing concerning me.''

Odin looked up at her from his seat upon his throne. ''He is no child, though, his years date the stars; how can I allow a man such disrespect?''

Jane kept her voice even and neutral. She felt so out of league advising immortals on anything, but there was no one else standing up, so she did what her heart told her was right. ''His problem stems from being underdeveloped emotionally. It's like we discussed earlier; we'll have to treat him like a child, at least at first if there is to be any hope for him.''

Odin leaned back into his throne, sighing heavily. ''Your words speak true. You prove my decision is choosing you as wife a wise choice; your council is sage and just.'' Odin smiled at her and she smiled back, squeezing his arm.


Jane walked as quickly as she could without breaking into a sprint; she didn't want to alarm the castle guard. If she started running, they would follow. Odin's voice literally shook the walls; his mood had powerful effects on this world itself, as if he breathed life into the stone, trees, and sky by the nature of his emotions. Right now he was obviously very upset, and Jane didn't have to guess who he was yelling at. It hadn't even been a full day, it amazed her how quickly Loki went to work at creating trouble once his punishment had ended.

When she finally rounded the last bend separating her from the scene going on in the royal throne room, Jane saw Loki was bruised and cut, trussed up in ropes between Fandral and Hogun, Thor standing back and to the side watching Odin rage at his other son. '' soon after I bring you back, yet again!''

Jane rushed to his side and placed a calming hand on his forearm, the gesture causing him to glance over at her. Odin visibly relaxed, seating himself as Jane stepped forward addressing those present. ''Your father is understandably upset, so I'm going to speak on his behalf for a few moments to give him time to cool off.'' Jane took in Loki and how fiercely he glowered at her and her nervousness crept back in. What if he just never accepted her as his mother? That would make discipline impossible, if he didn't respect her. Jane shoved the feeling down as soon as it surfaced; if she was going to be Odin's wife then she would have to be Loki's mother, and if she was going to be Loki's mother she was going to be a damn good mom. ''What happened, Loki?''

Loki stood aghast and confused. Aghast that Jane dared speak for Odin his father, and confused that she asked him what happened and not Hogun or Fandral to his left and right or Thor behind him. Loki was not used to being asked his side of the story first. Loki pushed the feeling aside; this woman had no place here, so he snarled. ''What care you, woman? I don't feel inclined to explain myself to you regardless.''

Jane walked up to Loki and he flinched back a little, suddenly very aware of his vulnerable state tied up as he was. But when she reached up it wasn't to slap him but to gently turn his head as she inspected his face. ''You are hurt. Hogun, could you please fetch me some bandages?'' The tall warrior nodded and quickly moved away to do as he was asked.

Loki stared, ''Why care you whether or not I bleed?'' His face twisted once more into an angry scowl. ''If you think that I will accept you as my rightful mother just because you doctor the wounds Thor inflicted on me you are sorely mistaken.''

Odin stood quickly and Jane whirled around to share a look with him. The All-father clenched his fists as he reeled in his angry comment, and to Loki's surprise Odin turned, leaving the room suddenly. Loki's voice rang of incredulity, ''What mad sorcery have you placed upon my father?!''

Jane almost laughed but held onto the urge tightly, knowing that Loki would think she was mocking him if she did. ''You know I don't have any special powers, Loki. Your father simply respects me and understands that anger isn't going to help you.''

Loki's mind still reeled from the initial shock of Jane speaking instead of Odin; this was too much and he suddenly felt like everything was upside down. ''I never asked your help, nor do I desire it!'' Hogun returned with bandages and Jane did not reply to Loki's words, instead turning to tell Hogun that he could leave before swabbing at Loki's cuts with a damp cloth. Loki winced at the treatment, ''Ow!''

Jane gave him a crooked smile. ''Oh don't be such a baby. Fandral, Thor, he is bound tightly so I don't think there is any need for you to guard him while we talk.''

Fandral responded with a ''Yes, ma'am'' before departing and Thor thanked her, bowing before he also left.

Loki sneered at her. ''You may have made a mistake in dismissing them, you underestimate me.''

Jane shook her head at him as she continued to dress his wounds. ''I don't think you would try to hurt me, Loki. In fact, I will prove my faith in you by untying you.''

Loki stared at her wide-eyed as she did what she said, pulling the knots free of the ropes binding his arms before returning to ministering his cuts. Loki stared at her hard as he rubbed his sore wrists. ''I do not understand, what do you hope to gain from this?''

Jane shrugged. ''I don't really have any plans, I would just like for you to trust me. I love your father, and want you to know that while I may never be your mother, I do want to be your friend.''

Loki had heard it all today. So many things this woman extended him that none had ever offered Loki. Friendship? ''Clearly you are an imbecile, and do not understand who and what I am. Let me be the one to inform you; I am Loki, god of evil, mischief, and trickery. The others fear me for good reason, as you also should.''

Jane merely shook her head at him. ''Nonsense. Perhaps the fact that I have a fresh perspective helps me see that you are a victim here, too. Stop backing away, I'm trying to get some dried blood.''

Loki slapped Jane's hand roughly, sending the towel flying. ''Do not presume to know me, mortal! Obviously you have much to learn about what it is to be a victim!'' Loki grabbed Jane around the hand. ''But I can happily show you!''

Jane's face changed completely from the concerned look she had when she had been tending his cuts, and Loki felt things had turned for the worse even before she snatched his wrist, pulling it powerfully off of hers. Jane moved back towards the throne and Loki found himself pulled inexorably forward, the might of her limbs shocking him. Loki realized his mistake now; he had assumed that Odin had only given her immortality like the rest of them, but her grip was like granite, suggesting that Odin had imbued her with more than a little godly strength.

As Jane seated herself upon Odin's throne, Loki reeled in revulsion at the act mixed with panic at what she might be about to do; he was confused, but some instinctual part of him said this was about to get very ugly. ''W-what are you doing!? Unhand me, wench!''

Jane pulled him hard and Loki fell across her knees, his legs kicking around as he tried to stand back up, but she held him tightly, pinning his chest to her leg. ''I hear you can't cast your spells without your hands. I do want to be your friend, but I'm also not going to tolerate you acting out like this. Everyone else says you do it because your evil, but we both know it's your reaction to your own insecurities, don't we?''

Loki strained to look around at her, realizing how absurd he must look draped over her legs like this and blushing a frustrated crimson. ''You know nothing! I have existed before time as you know it, how dare you second-guess my motivations! Release me, or I promise you will suffer most severely!''

Jane shook her head at the squirming Loki, adjusting him so his head fell further forward, pushing his hips into her leg so he had less room to maneuver forward. She pulled his pants down and Loki released a strangled roar of outrage. ''You have had this coming for a long time. You know what the best thing about a spanking is, Loki? It's very personal, I also feel every swat, and in a way share in your punishment, showing that I only do it because I genuinely want you to correct your behavior.''

Loki screamed at her, spittle flying from his curling lips. ''You dare to correct MY behavior?! Mortal, you fail to grasp how far you have overreached yourself!''

Jane slapped his cheeks hard and Loki yelped at the sudden pain. ''First off; I'm not a mortal anymore, I'm a god just like you now, and second; like it or not I have married your father and am your mother now, so deal with it.''

Loki bucked and thrashed as she continued to swat him hard and he threw a baleful glare back her way. ''You may be immortal now, but you shall never be my equal! And you will never be my mother!'' Loki cried out as Jane increased the pace, slapping him hard and fast on the same cheek over and over. The arm closest to her was pinned under himself and hung uselessly in front of him, while her iron grip still held the other tightly to his back. Loki suddenly realized that he couldn't stop her from hitting him no matter how he struggled and this filled his heart with a new panic. ''Release me, or the damned of Niffilheim will shudder at thought of what I do to you!''

Jane kept her pattern of agonizing slaps, Loki's ass starting to turn a bright shade of red under the punishment. ''At some point your going to realize that words like those never help you.''

Loki groaned and twisted, weighed down by his helpless loss of control. He didn't know what she wanted, but he didn't feel like he could take much more. Perhaps the woman was too stupid to realize that what she did was incredibly dangerous? If so, how long did she intend to keep this up? Loki felt sweat bead on his forehead as he kicked, looking back fearfully to see a determined look on her face staring at his ass that both embarrassed and frightened him. Loki gritted his teeth, ''You know nothing, you bitch!''

Jane shook her head sadly and bit her bottom lip as she concentrated on hitting him even harder. Loki really yelled now, thrashing about wildly with his feet and free arm, his mouth an O as his back arched in pain. She could say more but she saw there was no point, at least not yet. She was going to have to break Loki first to make him respect her enough to listen to what she had to say. That thought might have daunted her once upon a time, but somehow this felt right, so she slapped him with zeal, listening to his cries and knowing that she was getting her message across.

Loki was swamped with things he could not deal with today. First the mortal mother, then her supplanting Odin in disciplining him, now she spanked him! Not only was the situation itself highly degrading, but his now involuntary shouts of bitter pain could surely be heard by others of the court. Loki only hoped that none wandered into the throne room and removed all doubt as to what was happening and to whom. Tears of pain and humiliation sprouted in his eyes and Loki turned his head down, not wanting Jane to see that she had made him cry. Yet another indignity she had made him suffer. The worst part of it was that he was beyond his tolerance level for such pain, he was not a stout warrior like Thor, and soon he may not be able to contain his rising shameful desire to beg her to stop.

Jane sensed the shift in his attitude and realized she was close to achieving her goal. She adjusted him so that the arch of his ass was raised high and easily accessible and she began to swat him absolutely as hard and fast as she could. Loki's eyes widened and he wailed as he shuddered and jerked in her lap. ''Stop! Odin's beard, please stop!''

Jane ceased slapping the trickster and panted as both of them regained their breath, Loki's hitching occasionally. He still hid his face from her, but she could tell he was crying. Her expression softened. ''What do I have to do to make you respect me, Loki?'' The trickster god didn't respond, only stared mutely at the floor. ''I would do it, because your opinion of me matters a lot to me. I hope one day soon you realize the reason I did this was to help you grow.''

Jane pulled Loki's pants back up and Loki stood as soon as she released her hold of him, sniffling as he did his best not to meet her eyes. No one had ever cared about Loki's opinion on anything before, and her words only added to his growing sense of confusion as feelings foreign to him fought for a place in his heart. He snarled at her without fully turning to face her, still afraid to let her see the tears drying on his face. ''Do not think we are done, woman. We shall continue this conversation at another time.''

Jane nodded soberly. ''I wouldn't have it any other way.''

With that Loki cast a spell, vanishing in a billowing cloud of unnatural smoke. He shot a glance at her just as he faded away and saw concern on her face.

Did someone really care for Loki?