A week had passed since the horrible accident that killed Renee and Phil happened. I relived the night every time I went to sleep. There wasn't a single detail that I could possibly forget. The police had believed Phil's body had been damaged in the wreck and didn't look any further into it. Emmett used a shard of glass to cut the main artery in his throat to explain the lost of blood.
Renee probably would have had a higher chance of survival if she hadn't been pregnant. The crash had caused her water to break prematurely. They had to make quick decisions. It was either save the baby or they both died. One out of three was still sad but at least Elizabeth survived. She was too young to not get an opportunity at life out of the hospital. At least Renee and Phil had been happy before they were gone.
The funerals were in Florida so I obviously missed it. Not that I minded at all. I had been to more than enough funerals to last me a life time. I felt bad for not being their but funerals were just a way to say goodbye. I had already done that so I really had no reason to do so.
It still amazed me how Jasper had managed to deal with all of the blood. There had been so much and he never even seemed tempted by it.
Carefully I laid the tiny body bundled in the ugly hospital blankets on the bed in between my legs. I had been holding her ever since I got up at eight this morning, only putting her down to use the bathroom and for her feedings. It was already ten at night and my arms were killing me.
The doctor was surprised to find that Elizabeth was able to maintain a steady body temperature after only being out of the womb for three days. He took her off of the incubator but she had trouble breathing sometimes so she was still on the ventilator. For a premature baby she was extremely strong, a fighter. She made me think of Phil in that way.
I stiffened when she started making noise; I thought I had woken her back up. She screamed really loud when she got upset which she did whenever I wasn't holding her. It was nice at first, being close to her, but then I realized she probably missed Renee which made me sad. I watched as my little sister squirmed before settling down. Her light snores began to feel the air.
I leaned back onto Jasper's chest with a sigh. I was sitting in between his legs on the bed. I wanted to make sure he was close by just in case I dropped her. It was only partially because of my sprained wrist. Neither of us knew anything about babies because I never had any siblings and Jasper wasn't human. He had seen way more movies than I had so he knew the basics. He taught me how to hold her properly without hurting her. Every hour I stayed with her I learned something new. It was a joy to just watch her, even if the only thing she did was sleep, cry, poop, and drool. She hasn't opened her eyes yet but the doctor said that was normal and to just give her time.
"Jazz," I said softly so I wouldn't wake her.
Elizabeth smiled in her sleep as she heard Jasper's voice. He refrained from holding her all that much for the obvious reasons but he talked to her all of the time. I was sure if he were human he would have wanted kids. I could see him with two little boys and a girl with the white picket fence. I was glad that he would be a part of Elizabeth's life.
"We never really talked about the accident," I stated.
He nodded. "I wasn't sure if you wanted to or not." We were both silent for a moment, not sure what to say. He ran his fingers lightly up and down my arms. I couldn't really think when he was doing that.
"Um…Well, I was just curious to know how you were alright with all of the blood. Were you even tempted?"
"I'm not really sure how that happened. Since I have been with you my control has improved drastically. I think I was just so worried about you that I couldn't focus on the blood. Even if you were perfectly okay I would never hurt you by feeding off of your parents, dead or not." He pressed his lips to the top of my head. "How are you with all of this? Taking care of your sister, I mean. What are you thinkin?"
I sighed. If I ever knew what I was thinking I would be a hell of a lot calmer.
"Well…I feel kind of obligated to take care of her. She is my sister. But it's not just that. If I were to put her in the system there are so many things that could happen to her. Victoria could find her and kill her. She could get to a family that doesn't care about her or treats her wrong. She could end up with people that beat her. And I'd never be able to see her and make sure she was okay. I know being a vampire you aren't always comfortable being around humans and I just want you to know that when Victoria and her army are taken care of you can leave if you want."
That hurt me so much to say I had to block my feelings from him. I was suddenly glad I was facing away from him since I didn't have to see his reaction. I felt it though even though I was blocking mine from him. I gasped as the unexpected onslaught of emotion pounded into me. He was feeling so much hurt, confusion, and rejection. I felt tears burn in my eyes as I cut his emotions off. I hated myself for making him feel that way.
"You don't want me around?" His voice sounded so confused and heartbroken.
"Of course I do. I just don't want you to feel like you have to stay. I won't hate you if you ever find this is too much to handle. You didn't exactly sign up for all of this. I know that if you stayed it would be a daily struggle for you and I don't want that for you."
He wrapped his arms around my waist as tightly as he could without hurting me and rested his chin on my shoulder. I felt his cool breath on my ear. "I love you more than anything and nothing will pull me away from you. I'd rather die."
"But what happens when I do, die I mean. We aren't all immortal."
"I know Darlin but we can figure something out. If you want to stay human for the remainder of your life I am okay with that. I'd prefer to keep you forever but I'm lucky just to have you now. I will stick with you until you order me away."
I was surprised by his words. I never really thought being changed was an option. Edward had been so against it I had just assumed Jasper would be too. Though, I had no idea why. Jasper and Edward were nothing alike so why would they have the same values?
"Okay," I said simply and placed a soft kiss on his lips.
***End of Flashback***
I glanced up when I heard the door to our door slide in. I had expected it to be Jasper. About half an hour ago he had gone to get me some lunch. Rosalie was roaming the hospital's perimeter while Emmett was taking a wider sweep of the whole block. It wasn't really ready considering Laurent had said she was preparing an army. Even Jasper had said it would take at least four months to get them to the stage where they were somewhat functional. They couldn't be sure if Laurent was being truthful though so they were always alert.
I was surprised to see Jacob walk into my room. I placed Lizzie, my new nickname for my sister, into her bed. Jacob stood awkwardly, barely inside of the room. He looked even taller next to all of the baby equipment. He was wearing a pair of cut offs and a wife beater which was weird since it was really cold outside but werewolves had that weird extreme heat going on for them so he probably didn't even notice.
"Hey Jacob," I said as I crossed the room to hug him. He seemed even warmer to me since I was so used to hugging Jasper.
"Hey. I uh…I'm really sorry about everything. I promise that we will get her," he said sincerely.
I pulled away to look at him. For the first time I noticed just how exhausted he looked. His eyes were bloodshot and bruise like shadows hung above his cheekbones. He wasn't sleeping because of me. Jacob should be a normal teenage boy chasing girls and going to parties. It wasn't fair that he had to grow up so quickly. Victoria had ruined everything, and it wasn't even my fault. I didn't kill James. I didn't rip his body to pieces. I didn't burn him. All I did was lay there in pain trying to not allow the fire he pushed into my veins to take me over. The only person she could be angry with was James. Stupid vampire.
"I know you will Jake."
"So…The bloodsucker left you alone."
I gave him a dirty look. "The bloodsucker's name is Jasper and he didn't. Rosalie is downstairs."
He scrunched his nose. "Yeah I smelt her. Why isn't she up here with you?" He walked over to the couch and dropped on to it. His massive body took up most of the tiny loveseat. He ran a hand threw his shaggy hair and yawned.
"She does sometimes. They don't believe Victoria will attack soon or at a public place but they want to be sure. They'll relax when we can finally go home with Liz."
He raised an eyebrow. "You're keeping the kid. Do you think that is the best choice?"
I walked over to the bed and lifted Elizabeth out. Thankfully the wires were long enough to stretch almost all the way to the other side of the room. I could hold her while I was on my bed or on my couch. She made a noise of complaint as I woke her from the nap she was taking. All she ever did was sleep which according to the nurse was a good thing. I actually kind of wish she was more fussy so I could feel like I was actually doing something every once in awhile.
I sat next to Jacob and put my legs on his lap. Lizzie rested in the crease between my legs making soft cooing noises. She was making weird faces and for a second her eyes opened only to be slammed shut again. The light was too bright for her. She had been doing that a lot. Sooner or later she would adjust and we'd be able to see her beautiful eyes.
"I'm positive this is the right choice. I've gone through a million scenarios in my head and this was always the best result." Being next to Jacob she was already beginning to get warm. I took her little cap off of her head and raked my fingers softly through her hair. For a preemie, or a baby in general, she had surprisingly thick hair. Most babies came out bald but she had a mop of curly brown hair.
"What about school," Jacob asked. He stared down at my little sister with a look in his eyes. Was it confusion, maybe?
"I talked to the school officials and they said I didn't have to return until the 6th and the 7th for my finals. They understand that I need space from everything after all of this that has happened."
"We could work out a new schedule for those days. Sam and I could keep patrol around the school. Paul and Jared could patrol around the hospital. Embry and Quil could patrol around Forks while Leah and Seth keep up with La Push." He nodded to himself. I wasn't even sure he realized he had made that plan out loud. It didn't matter because I didn't like it anyway.
"Jake, if the guys are as exhausted as you are then they really don't need to overwork themselves. The Cullens are pretty much on it and they don't lose sleep over it. And, you know, you have school too."
He smiled, smugly. "Not any longer. We graduate early on the rez. My last day was yesterday."
"Oh…Well then you should be sleeping in until 3 and having fun with your friends like normal teenagers," I protested. It wasn't fair that he had to throw away his life for me. I really wasn't worth it.
"Honey I'm not normal."
I sighed. "I know."
Lizzie made a gurgling noise. I looked down in alarm only to see her smiling up at me. She was blinking repeatedly but her big hazel eyes were definitely open. I covered my mouth to keep from squealing in joy. I had expected it to take so much longer but she was so much stronger than other babies.
"She is really tiny."
"She was born two months early. She is doing really well though."
"Do the wires hurt her?" He grimaced as he stared at the plastic wire in her nose. I could not wait until she was able to get those taken out. She shouldn't have to be hooked up her first few days of life.
"No they just help her breath. Hopefully it won't be that much longer until she can have them out. Do you want to hold her?"
He looked nervous but nodded. I carefully lifted Lizzie up into Jacob's arms. "Am I doing this right?"
I giggled. "Yeah Jake. You're doing great. You should probably get used to holding babies. How is Angela by the way?"
I laughed as his face turned red. "We had a bonfire not that long ago. She knows everything now and she is okay with it. I really love her."
I smiled up at him. "That's really great Jake. I know you guys will be great together."
"You're the reason I met her. Thank you." He smiled over at me and kissed my cheek. Unfortunately I was lifting my head up to look at him when he decided to do it. His lips caught the corner of mine.
I jumped when I heard a growl. I looked up to see Jasper stalking into the room, dropping my food on the floor. His eyes were pitch black again. I had only seen him like this once before but I knew Jacob was not safe right now. I took Lizzie from his arms and stood.
"Jazz," I warned softly as I placed Liz in her bed. "Calm down."
Jacob jumped up to his feet. I didn't even see Jasper move but I did see Jacob fall to the ground with a bang. I felt Jasper's rage as he crouched into an attacking position. Growls were coming from him and he looked ready to pounce.
"Jazz, don't. Jacob, get out of here, slowly."
Jacob tried to get up but Jasper hissed and struck him in his leg, knocking him down again. Jacob was shaking all over. This room was not big enough for him if he were to change. Not to mention the fact that this was a hospital and if they kept being loud someone would come in and see this.
I got up and walked slowly to Jasper. "Bella don't it's not safe."
I ignored Jacob and placed my hand on Jasper. "Baby, let him go. You know I am yours. He was only thanking me."
"He kissed you," Jasper stated. The rumbling growl was still in his chest. "He had his hands on our baby."
I was shocked to hear him say that. Was that really what he thought about us, a family?
I wasn't really sure what to say to him when he was in this state. He cared about Lizzie as much as I did. I knew he would never harm her but I was worried for Jacob. His death would result in the lost of my best werewolf friend, the exposure of vampires, a pack of werewolves after us, and the lost of my best human friends because she would never forgive me. This definitely could not happen.
"I know but it is okay. You have to let Jacob go. If someone sees this they will make us all leave, without Lizzie. I know you don't want that. Let Jacob leave and we can talk okay?" I rubbed my hands up and down his arms, trying to calm him.
"Leave," he hissed at Jake.
Jacob seemed like he was about to protest but I cut him off. "I'll call you later. Just go."
He glared at Jasper before jumping up and walking out. Moving faster than I could see Jasper turned around and wrapped his arms around me. He was so full of hatred it scared me. He was mumbling something that I could only barely hear.
"You are mine! He shouldn't have touched you, kissed. I can smell his scent all over you. I won't let this happen again. You are mine. Nobody else can have you. I won't be weak this time. If anyone wants you they can fight for you. You're mine."
I understood why he was so possessive now. He didn't want to lose me like he lost Alice. This would be a normal reaction for humans but since Jasper was a vampire he was really aggressive. I really hated Alice. How could she do this to him? He was so unsure of himself. I couldn't even be angry with him for not trusting me.
"I am yours Jazz. No one will take me from you, I promise." I pulled back to look at his eyes. The blackness began to fade and then there was only his normal golden color. I leaned up and pressed my lips to mine. "I love you and only you."
"I love you too. I'm sorry…"
"Don't," I interrupted. "Don't apologize. I know you didn't mean to upset me. It's okay." Looking at him I noticed the rip in his jeans that wasn't there when he left along with the dirt on his shirt. "What happened," I demanded.
Jasper ignored my question and walked over to Lizzie. "Do you think it will be okay to hold her? The wolf made her hot. I don't think I will bother her much…"
She was already bundled in two blankets. I really doubt Jasper's temperature would bother her at all. I picked her up and placed her in Jasper's awaiting arms. He smiled widely at her when he saw that her eyes were open. She looked up at Jazz with wonder in her big eyes.
"She likes you. You should hold her more often."
He smiled at me. I ate the food he brought me as he cooed at the baby. It was so adorable to see them together. "Do you really think of her as our baby?" I asked once I was finished.
He felt embarrassed and I instantly knew the answer. "Yeah…I've always wanted a family."
I got up and joined him on the couch. "I think you will be a great father." I changed the subject. "Are you going to tell me what happened now?"
He sighed. "While I was out I stopped by Charlie's house. I was going see if there were some things that you might have wanted. There was a newborn there. He was gathering things with your scent on it. I chased him into the woods and killed him. Emmett went back to the house. He is going to clear out the house then we'll put it on the market."
I nodded sadly. I knew the house would have to go eventually. I would never be able to go see it without seeing Charlie's blank stare. It needed to go.
"Knock, knock," the nurse said as she came into the room. She was annoyingly cheerful and chipper. "Sorry to interrupt but Elizabeth needs to go through some test. If she passes she will be able to go home really soon!"
With a sigh Jasper released Lizzie and watched as the nurse took her away.
"Okay we can probably go back now," I said once the credits began to role.
"I'm hurt. You didn't enjoy our date."
Jasper insisted that since we wouldn't be with Lizzie we had no reason to be there. He took me to get ice cream then we went to a movie. It was nice to do this with him but I was worried about Liz. I wanted to know if she would be able to come home soon. Rosalie was there but that didn't make me feel any better. She wanted a baby. For all I could know she was trying to steal her! I hated thinking about her like that but it wasn't like we were best friends or anything.
"I did baby really," I assured him. "It was great. I just want to go see Lizzie. This is the longest I've ever been away from her."
He smiled and kissed me. "Alright Darlin. We can go back."
He held my hand as he drove. Every few minutes he would turn to me with a big grin on his face. I wondered what he was thinking about but I didn't want to break the comfortable silence that fell around us. I had never felt so comfortable with a person in my entire life. I knew he was the one.
"So, I was thinkin'," Jasper started after awhile. "After the newborns are taken care of we should leave somewhere. Just the three of us. We haven't been together long enough and I am just not ready to share you yet."
"That sounds like a great idea Jasper. Did you have any place in mind?"
"Well there is this island I bought awhile ago. I had bought it for Alice but she really hated it. I thought that well maybe you would appreciate it and well…If that doesn't seem like a good idea we can go somewhere else."
"I really hate her," I told him honestly. "Who doesn't like an island? It's an island!"
He smiled grimly. "It doesn't have a shopping mall or the type of animals she likes. Oh and there is a lot of sun so she could see my scars even better. I couldn't really blame her for not liking that part of it though."
"I don't mind your scars in the slightest," I told him honestly. "They're apart of who you are."
He smiled over at me but didn't say anything. He gently brought my hand to his lips and placed a light kiss on it. I felt like my insides were going to explode. He was so perfect and I would never understand how I had gotten lucky enough to have him.
AN: Sorry I haven't written in awhile. My computer was screwing up. I just got it fixed so hopefully I can keep the chapters coming. I'm sorry this one was short. R&R