Summary: Everyone underestimated her...Arthur, Uther, Alvarr, and Gaius. Even the Great Dragon called her just a simple 'witch.' Morgana's greatest power is also her greatest weakness: no one believes in her. oneshot, written after S2E12.
Disclaimer: I don't own "Merlin". Unlike SyFy, I didn't pay for it. Also credit goes to Nancy Springer whose books "I am Morgan Le Fey" and "I am Mordred" have forever shaped my view of Arthurian legend.
This oneshot was written immediately after viewing Season 1, Episode 12 of the BBC's Merlin. It was always my fervent hope they'd turn her into the badass bitch any Morgan Le Fay was meant to be.
THIS ONESHIT WAS REVAMPED INTO A ONESHOT on AUGUST 5th, 2012 BY DANCELIFEAWAY.
and then on september 9th I went back and edited by typos. because I am too lazy to do it properly the first time.
I AM MORGANA
No one ever expected much of me. Think about it: while Morgause was given to Nimueh, a powerful priestess…I ended up the ward of Uther Pendragon. Even the man who raised me expected me to be quiet and obedient when it was clear there was always a fire burning inside of me. I was never meant to be some classic princess in her tower. No, no...I was meant for so much more. And yet at Camelot I was constantly underestimated. Gaius tried to quiet my visions, stifling my budding powers; Arthur was always surprised that I could fight him and win. They all said they loved me, but they didn't even know me. All those years of ignorance, all the wasted time…
I didn't know it then, but even the Great Dragon considered me nothing more than a simple witch, incapable of harnessing the power of the crystal Alvarr manipulated me into stealing. The ease with which he was able to do it embarrasses me now, but it does not surprise me. I was a little girl desperate for someone to notice me for what I really could be. A stupid girl too blinded by that desperation to see herself. It was unfortunate, but I made up for it later in life.
It confuses me now, how they could have tossed me aside so easily. All those prophecies about Mordred and I 'uniting in evil' and no one thought I could be anything more than a simple witch? Nothing in those prophecies which foretold my true nature? Even Mordred, my dearest companion, so often failed to see me in the way he should have. Nothing, and no one, on earth was brave enough to speak about me in truest term. But in Avalon, they were not.
My entrance into Avalon was unprecedented. Even Morgause, my sister and priestess of the Old Religion, had never achieved such a feat. No one believed I, Lady Morgana of Camelot, would outshine them all. But I did. They Fey of Avalon welcomed me! They proclaimed me to be one of their own in essence! They taught me there, more than Morgause or Mordred or the Druids could ever have hoped to know. In Avalon, I was special. Not a helpess girl, not a hunted enchantress, and not a tool of either fate or men. I became a force to be reckoned with there and I found in myself more power than anyone ever suspected.
Looking back, Morgause was the only one who ever understood. Perhaps it was because she was also a woman, or because she was my sister. Maybe it was both. I remember how once I commented to her that my future was not of my own making. Her reply? I underestimated myself. She was so close to the truth. I underestimated myself and it held me back. In turn, I allowed myself to be underestimated by everyone else.
But not anymore.
They all once believed me to be nothing more than a silly, impressionable girl caught up in an evil scheme. Oh, but I am so much more. One day, they'll realize their mistake. While they scramble to defy fate and change what it is too late to alter, I just stand by and watch, laughing. They should have started with me! But no, they ignored me, my possible value and influence. Pushed me off to the side. So now I say who brought down Uther Pendragon? Who foresaw Merlin abandoning Camelot? Who was welcomed into Avalon? Who will heal the Once and Future King?
My greatest strength will always be that once I was foolish, but now I am strong. Because I let them think so little of my abilities, because they would never have answered "Morgana" to any of those questions…they were never prepared.
When all the rest have passed away and decayed, I will remain. When Morgause faces her mortality and the hounds come to take her, I will remain. When Merlin leaves Camelot and Arthur to die at the hands of Mordred, when it all ends in Camlann, I will remain.
For I am Morgana. I am FATE. In the end, they all bow to me.