Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, I just manipulate the characters.
I really should get to bed but I needed to write this first. Reviews tell me what to fix so please do. If I get positive responses I might continue but it's late and I have school tomorrow.
Contrary to Popular Belief:
1: Uzumaki Naruto does not love the color orange; he hates it for all it represents. He wears it to stand out and attract attention because, well, who in their right mind wears a bright orange jumpsuit, ninja or not? This garners him attention from shinobi and non shinobi alike and that is what he wants.
2: Mitarashi Anko is not a slut, nor does she like being stared at by every straight male in the Elemental Countries. She got tired of the insults of 'whore' and 'snake bitch' so she decided that if she couldn't make them stop, she'd give them something real to complain about.
3: Hyuuga Hinata does not love her family. She would happily see them dead, even kill them herself, if it meant she could be free to do what she wanted with her life, be with Naruto. She knows that if she did that she'd become a missing nin and then her chance with her Naruto-kun would be gone, so she bears their blank stares and cruel remarks.
4: Uchiha Itachi is not gay, he does not find pleasure in girls the same age as his brother, and he does find women attractive. He simply refuses to start a relationship with someone as he knows his brother will kill him or he'll die from his disease. Besides, the one person he loved is in Konoha, living her life as an ANBU captain and, last he heard, dating a jounin named Hayate.
5: Orochimaru is not a pedophile although he will admit to being gay. He chooses young boys bodies to take over because they survive longer and do not fall apart under the strain of his jutsus. He has used a few girls in them but he really doesn't like being a girl and having to bleed every month for three years.
6: Yamanaka Ino is not obsessed with Uchiha Sasuke but she isn't willing to admit that to Sakura or tell anyone that she was wrong about him. She's had her eye on a pineapple headed chunin for some time but she doesn't know how to tell him, so she makes sure that the Suna chick doesn't get her claws in him first and bides her time.
7: Jiraiya doesn't just want to cop a feel of Tsunade's breasts, but it gives him an excuse to get close to her. He's loved her since they were genin and he felt his heart break when she became engaged to Dan. He hopes that Naruto has better luck because he can see history repeating itself with Team 7 and he doesn't want the same thing for his new favorite blond gaki.
8: Hatake Kakashi isn't always reading Icha Icha when you see him with that little orange book. He's taken one of the covers and slipped it over his Bingo book so that people leave him alone while he sees what his old enemies are up to. He giggles when he sees one of them marked down as dead and then wonders who killed them. This is followed by a trip to the memorial stone to see the names of the ninjas they killed.
9: Aburame Shino is not emotionless; he just doesn't like to show them. He actually harbors some very strong feelings for TenTen as she is very attractive when tossing around weapons. He also hates Hyuuga Neji because he knows that TenTen likes him and he feels sadness when watching them together. No, he is not emotionless but he likes to ignore them because then he doesn't have to feel.
10: Uzumaki Kushina died peacefully because her husband never told her what he was going to do. She thought that Minato would live and raise their son. Maybe if she had known the truth she would have fought a little more for her life, or cursed his name.
11: Senju Tsunade is not secretly 'in love' love with anyone, especially Jiraiya, Naruto or any of the other men in Konoha. She knows Jiraiya loves her but she's doesn't return his feelings and never has. She didn't mean to love Naruto like he is her son but he reminds her of her brother and she thinks that maybe she can keep him safe, and stop a repeat of what happened with Nawaki.
12: Inuzuka Kiba is not and will never be in love with Hyuuga Hinata. He sees her like a little sister and he'll hurt anyone that dares to try to hurt his imouto. He has his eye on a civilian girl who loves dogs and is 'hot' too.
13: Momochi Zabuza never saw Haku as his son. Haku was his younger brother, Daisuke, all over again, from the massive femininity to the wish to never take a life. Every time he looked at Haku he say Daisuke and it hurt him to remember his omouto that died in the coup d'état he tried to pull.
14: Haruno Sakura doesn't like her hair color. It's pretty but she thinks that Sasuke will hate it and the concept of pink haired Uchiha's is scary to him. Naruto showed him a picture of what he thought a kid from the two of them would look like and Sasuke shuddered before turning away.
15: Rock Lee can get depressed. The first time it happened was when he was in the academy and was made fun of by the other children. The second time was when Gaara defeated him in the Chunin Exam prelims. Both times it was Gai-sensei that helped him to be happy again and for that the man can never be repaid.
16: Nara Shikamaru is not completely lazy. Occasionally he comes up with strategies to win over the girl he has decided to marry before discarding them because the girl he has decided to marry isn't the nice, meek woman he always envisioned, but is stubborn, bossy and blond. He then goes back to sleep because he knows she'll come to him on her own time.
17: Akamichi Chouji does occasionally stop eating. This however is a rare occurrence and should be treated as a good reason to stop, look around and see if there are any very strong enemies waiting to kill you. Chouji loves his chips and barbeque and if he has stopped eating then something is seriously wrong.
18: Uchiha Sasuke does want to restore his clan. He however cannot find a woman he finds both attractive and strong enough to carry a new generation of Uchihas and until he finds one he would rather work on getting rid of his brother.