Who Are You?
Remus lay face down clutching at the sheets and panting as Severus pounded into him from behind, clutching at the werewolf's hips, bruises of varying ages attested to having had tried this before, garnering similar results.
'Stop, stop,' he pleaded as he gasped, biting back a sob.
Severus stopped and gently pulled Remus down so he could spoon behind the slightly smaller man.
'I'm sorry,' Severus whispered into the damp flesh of Remus' neck.
'I can't, I can't,' Remus gasped as he tried to breath, the sex hadn't left him breathless; it had been the gaping void in his chest that had.
They weren't complete, they needed their third, and Severus knew that and so did Remus, but it had been almost three years since their third had left. Not by choice. No, Harry had died.
It had been the final battle, Harry had only turned 19 just over two months before and as Severus had fought several death eaters and Remus snapped and snarled with Greyback, Harry had faced off against Voldemort. The explosion rocked Hogwarts and when it finally calmed the only thing that was left of Harry was his wand.
They had only had Harry for two months at the time.
'I need him, Sev, please,' Remus clutched at Severus' arm as he held Remus tightly as he shook and he murmured soothingly to Remus, who soon drifted off and Severus lay quietly, his face buried in Remus' hair as he shed his own tears for their lost lover.
'Thank you all for coming this morning,' Minerva greeted everyone as they sat around the staff table. An assortment of greetings returned to her.
'As you know, I've hired another new defence professor,' she stated clearly exasperated with the fact that the position couldn't be filled for more than a year. Actually the last two had only lasted for half a year each. The first one, a Spanish wizard who, they were all sure was older than time itself, had collapsed in class one day just before the holidays, dead before they got him to the infirmary; and the second had simply vanished into the Forest sometime in May.
'I have not yet met the young man but he should be here shortly. He's got two small children, twin boys,' she gave a small smile, there hadn't been small children in the castle for some time, and she was looking forward to spoiling them, if their father would allow it. 'He has asked that you don't ask about their mother, their birth was hard,' she stated, 'and he doesn't remember much of his life growing up, so please don't ask him about it.' Just as she finished there was a flash and a squeal of delight and a shriek of terror from outside the door.
'Does this phoenix belong to anyone?' A smoky voice asked from the door way, everyone stared the man standing there with said phoenix on one arm and a toddler curled into his neck with another at his feet trying to jump up and grab at the tail feathers.
'Harry?' Remus breathed, unable to believe what he was seeing. Severus held Remus back from launching himself at the young man. The new comer did look remarkably like Harry, expressive green eyes that peculiar shade of green, though the glasses were gone and while his hair was wild it seemed to have a red tint to it. The hair fell across his forehead so he couldn't be sure.
'He seems to have chosen you,' Minerva offered, in a sad but amused kind of way.
'What?' he said in surprise.
'He's been in hiding for several years, since the last headmaster passed on, this is the first we've seen of him in several years.' Professor Sprout offered since Minerva had gotten a little misty eyed.
'Oh,' he said rather stupidly.
'Who are you?' Filch asked, glaring at this new intruder.
'Oh forgive me,' he blushed, and Severus' heart clenched because he looked as fetching as Harry had, 'Roan, Roan Steward, and these two are Roderick,' he bounced the one in his arms, 'and Sebastian,' he nudged the other boy with his leg.
'Roan, forgive us,' Minerva stated.
'There is nothing to forgive,' he said slightly distractedly, 'you're very beautiful but you're getting heavy, plus I would like my arm back,' he spoke to Fawkes who rubbed his head against Roan's before taking flight and soaring out the window.
Sebastian, who had been entranced with Fawkes, was now staring about the room with wide amber eyes. His dark mop of thick hair was just as unruly as his fathers and suddenly he was toddling forward as he giggled. The staff watched as Roan followed Sebastian as the boy bee-lined it to Severus, of all people. The boy gave Severus a toothy grin before he began to try and pull himself up using Severus' robes.
'Bastian,' Roan began to chide.
'It's alright,' Severus stated, helping the boy onto his lap, settling him so the boy could still see his father, who had taken the seat next to Remus, who was staring at Roan in utter confusion and devastation. 'There, now, is there something you needed, child?' Severus asked, his attention focused on Sebastian. He completely missed the looks that ranged from horror to amusement on his colleagues faces.
'I'm sorry,' Roan began again, 'he doesn't normally do that. They both usually just cling to me, much like Roddy here.' The other boy had settled into Roan, his head on his father's chest. The staff finally realized that the boys looked nothing alike, Roddy's hair looked incredibly soft, almost feathery and it was a soft reddish brown and his eyes were a dark, almost black, green.
Remus had to forcibly remind himself that this man wasn't Harry and that these boys weren't his sons. He wanted to sob for his loss and strangle this man for taking Harry's life. He wanted to toss this man onto the table and ravage him stupid.
'Wolf,' that voice and a hand on his arm brought him back. He blinked back tears and gave Severus a watery smile, but he couldn't and he wouldn't and had to accept that.
'Are you okay?' Roan asked, placing a gently arm on the clearly distressed werewolf.
'I'm sorry, I have to go,' Remus said suddenly, pulling away from that arm. He rushed from the staff room. Severus gave a sigh.
'I'm sorry, I didn't mean anything, I just... he looked so sad...' Roan trailed off, his gaze still on the door that was slowly closing.
'You did nothing wrong,' Severus said softly, 'you just bear a striking resemblance to a lost lover. The loss was very hard on all of us,' he said, fighting to control his own emotions. 'I'm sorry sweet child, but we'll have to continue our conversation later.' Sebastian pouted as he was placed on his father's lap. Severus said something to Minerva, who nodded, and with a final sad glance at Roan, followed after Remus.
Minerva gave a sympathetic glance at Roan, who was still watching the door, before she started on her meeting.
Severus found Remus at the giant window that was across from their rooms.
He stood staring out, though Severus was sure that Remus wasn't actually seeing anything, his arms wrapped around himself.
Severus moulded himself to Severus' back and wrapped his own arms around his wolf. Remus relaxed into Severus' arms, leaning against his chest.
Neither one said anything for a long time.
'I love you,' Severus whispered softly into Remus' hair.
Remus turned and buried himself in Severus.
'Mr. Steward,' Minerva called him over, the other staff members, Flitwick, Hooch, Sprout, and Sinistra mainly, were playing with Roddy and Bastian.
'Roan, please, Headmistress,' he said with a small smile, 'Mr. Steward makes me feel like my grandfather,' he said by way of explanation. Minerva gave him a confused look but didn't comment.
'Don't take their reactions personally,' she said, 'you look remarkably like their partner and it's hard for them.' Roan went to ask about them but Minerva continued, 'Harry had only been with them for a short while before he d- was taken away. Even if they had only been with him for a few months, they were-' she sighed, 'they were inseparable.'
'This, Harry, was very lucky to have been so loved,' Roan said softly, and Minerva could feel a pained longing coming from him.
'It doesn't have to be tonight, but if you need to talk, my door is always open,' she offered with a gentle squeeze to his shoulder. 'And please, call me Minerva.' She offered with a smile.
'Thank you, Minerva,' he replied returning the smile.
'Daddy?' a small voice from around their knees pulled them from their gloom.
Roan crouched down, 'What is it, Roddy?' he asked.
Roddy yawned, 'sleep,' he buried himself into Roan's chest.
Roan chuckled softly as he stood, pulling his son into his arms, 'alright then, come on,' he turned to Minerva, 'if you could show me to our rooms, that would be fantastic.'
'Of course,' she smiled at the sight of the boy clinging to his father with his face buried in his clothes.
'Bast,' Roan called over, and chuckled, Sebastian was curled up with Flitwick who was only slightly taller than the toddler.
Professor Sprout took Sebastian so Flitwick could get up, 'I'll take him,' Roan offered.
'You sure?' she asked.
'Yeah, I've managed so far,' he said quietly if slightly bitterly, 'yes,' he stated loudly, 'I'll be fine, thanks.' He smiled brightly and Sprout returned his smile.
'Welcome to Hogwarts,' she offered as she followed the others out of the room.
Minerva was waiting for him at the door and as he settled his twins in his arms he followed her out and to the defence corridor.
His rooms were just past the Defence classroom and there was a tapestry that led to the infirmary just across from it. Poppy had offered to look after the twins when Roan had to teach.
'Thank you,' he said as they stood in the doorway.
She nodded, 'You're welcome.' She turned and with one final sad look that Roan missed, left him to put his sons to bed.
Roan glanced around, finding all his things were in the room, still packed. His bed wasn't though and he carefully placed his boys on the bed, letting them sleep.
He sat next to them, and sighed, this was harder than he thought it was going to be. He may not remember where he had come from but he knew that he was missing something, his son's helped because they were a part of what he was missing but he needed someone. He thought that maybe he would find it here because the school had practically called to him, even as he studied defence in Canada, it sang to him like a siren at sea.
He had thought, that maybe but so far the only two possibilities were together. Even in the short time that he had been in the same room with them he could tell that they were completely devoted to each other and that the only other person they would let in would be Harry. Whoever he was.
His head snapped up, Harry. He knew that name, it was a common enough name but there was something about that name. He moved several boxes both physically and magically, the latter almost absently, as he looked for his books. He found them and started to rifle through them, crying out triumphantly as he finally found Hogwarts a history.
Harry Potter, (pictured below) was probably the most famous student at Hogwarts. Not only was he the Man Who Defeat He Who Must Not Be Named, he was also the youngest seeker named to a house Quidditch team, at eleven years and four months, beating out Aerulius Swift by 23 days.
The article went on to describe Harry's years at school and his defeat of Voldemort and his heroic death. Roan didn't read any of it, he was too busy staring at the photo Harry. The photo of Harry was from graduation, he was with two other students a blonde boy in green and a redheaded girl that wasn't in graduation robes. All three were grinning like mad.
Roan was focused on Harry. His eyes were the same emerald green as Roan's and his hair was blacker than Roan's but the pair could have been brothers, twins even.
He slammed the book closed. This was insanity. There was no way that he had been Harry Potter before he had ended up in Canada, where he had just appeared out of nowhere.
He had woken up in a hospital bed, scared and disoriented. There had been a gentle hand and a soothing voice.
Somehow he had ended up in a wizarding village and they had helped him heal and come to terms with the fact that not only did he have no memory but he was pregnant! He hadn't been badly injured, a few bumps and bruises, serious drain on his magic and, of course, the lack of memory but he was otherwise unharmed.
As the pregnancy progressed he spent more and more time studying, he continued after his twins were born. He had help from the couple that had found him and he had come to see them as the parents he didn't remember. They had adopted him, given him his new name, new life and had encouraged him to go to Hogwarts. The grandfather he had mentioned had died a few months before he had left, he had been a stern man, clearly disgusted with the fact that Roan, a man had been with another man. It was a common enough sight around the town they lived in but Mr. Steward had looked at every couple with distaste.
Roan shook himself from his thoughts and began to unpack. Mostly using magic, but some of the more fragile things, he did by hand.
He stopped for the boys, they always woke up hungry and he let them play in their room, he had finished that first, and continued to work. Choosing not to think about Aaron, who'd he left behind, not that it would work out but he knew he had hurt the other man by leaving, but Roan had told him not to get attached but it had happened anyway. He didn't want to think about Harry, or Remus or Severus, and how hurt they must've been, still were. He didn't want to think about anything.
As Roan worked no one stopped by, not that he was expecting anyone too, and he managed to finish everything just as it came time to put the boys to bed for the night.
He stayed for a few more hours, working on his syllabus, which was admittedly already done, before he checked his boys and went to bed.
That night Roan had dreams of Basilisks, and mirrors, and big black dogs and beautiful Sphinxes.
'Are you alright, Mr. Steward?' Severus asked, he found the younger man out by the lake, the boys were splashing around in the shallows with a house elf, while Roan sat with the water lapping at his feet.
Roan was watching the boys but he had dark circles under his red tinted eyes, he seemed slower than he had been yesterday.
'Yeah, I had some strange dreams last night,' he replied, 'and please call me Roan, or Steward, if you prefer, no mister,' he shuddered mildly.
'Anything you want to talk about?' Severus asked, sitting next to Roan.
Roan turned to glance at him, he gave him an apologetic smile, 'no offence, but I don't even know you,' he said as gently as he could.
'Sometimes it helps when the person doesn't really know anything about what's going on,' he replied, watching the boys with the elf as they giggled and shrieked in the water.
When Roan didn't say anything for a long time, Severus shifted and Roan thought that he was about to leave but he simply took his boots and socks off and rolled up his pant legs, letting the water lap at his feet.
They sat in silence for a few minutes before both of them suddenly had a sopping wet, giggling toddler in their laps.
Bastian was babbling to Severus as Roddy simply lay contently against Roan.
'Oh, really? I had no idea. Is that so?' Severus commented when it looked like Bastian wanted a reply. Roan watched amused as he rubbed Roddy's back absently.
'The Basilisk, it's still in the chamber,' Roan blurted, Bastian continued to babble, even as Severus stared at Roan in surprise. 'You could use it for potion ingredients,' he offered, surprising himself.
Severus watched Roan as he turned his attention to Roddy.
'How did you know?' he asked softly.
'Know what, about the Basilisk or that you could use it?' Roan asked, splashing Roddy lightly, causing him to squirm and giggle.
'Yes,' Severus replied, letting Bastian play with his fingers.
'Hogwarts, a History, I read it before arriving here,' Roan replied.
Severus snorted, 'just like Granger,' he said more to himself, than to Roan.
'Who?' he asked, holding Roddy as he tried to stand in the water, the gentle motion and soft sand making it difficult for him. Beside them Bastian was trying to do the same, Severus holding him gently.
'One of Harry's classmates, they were like siblings,' he said sadly.
'They were?' Roan asked, curious and afraid as to why they weren't like siblings.
'It almost killed her when Harry d- when he left, but she had George and Draco and Ginny to help her. She's better, she and George, they just moved in together, they all miss Harry, he brought them all together,' his voice hitched and he blinked and looked away.
'Harry, he meant the world to you, to you and Remus, didn't he?' Roan asked softly.
Severus could only nod, but his head snapped up when he processed what Roan had actually said.
'What did you say?' he asked, almost angrily.
'What, that Harry meant the world to you?' he replied, confused.
'Why would you say that?' he asked, trying to not let his emotions get him.
'I don't understand,' Roan stated, 'my mum, she used to say it to me and to my boys, usually after an encounter with Mr. Steward.'
Severus' deflated, 'I'm sorry, I used to say that to Harry, we both did,' he explained.
'It's a common phrase,' he offered, 'I'm sorry,' he added softly, as he placed a hand on Severus arm. A jolt shot through both of them and suddenly Roan let go of Roddy grabbed his head. Roddy tumbled and landed on his bum, crying out in surprise. Bastian went immediately to Roddy while Severus reached out for Roan.
'Roan, what's wrong?' he asked, his concern overriding everything else.
Roan cried out as Severus touched him again. 'Roan?'
'Severus?' Remus asked, coming over to the group.
Bastian cried out and Severus absently reached for both boys, setting them farther inland so they couldn't get to the water. 'Watch them,' he told the elf that had moved to watch when the boys had attacked Severus and Roan.
Both Remus and Severus moved to Roan's side as he cried out in pain, 'Roan?'
'Not again!' he cried out as both Severus and Remus touched him. Suddenly all three of them were engulfed in a bright orange, fire-like, light.
He woke groggy and disoriented and nothing he remembered made any sense.
'Ah, Mr. Steward, you're awake, finally,' Poppy stated as she placed a tray on the table beside him and began to check him over.
'Mr. Steward?' he said, confused.
'Yes, Roan Steward, you're the defence professor, here at Hogwarts,' she said gently, not letting her worry about him leak into her voice too much.
He closed his eyes and gave his head a shake, trying to organize it, maybe get rid of the stuff that didn't belong, 'no, I... I'm not, I only just...' he couldn't quite figure out what he was trying to say.
'Daddy!' two voices squealed as two small bodies attacked him.
'Gently boys,' a stern, if amused voice, scolded them.
'Roddy, Bast,' he said in relief, hugging his boys tightly. Both of them snuggled against their Daddy.
'What happened?' he asked, it seemed the simplest question to ask, he finally looked up and his eyes widened in surprise. 'Sev? Remy?' he whispered hoarsely, eyes welling rapidly.
'Harry?' Remus breathed, in a combination of relief and disbelief.
He nodded as the blinked causing the tears to roll down his cheeks, he gasped and bit back a sob. Suddenly he couldn't breathe a combination of the well of emotion and the fierce kiss he was on the receiving end of.
Suddenly the warmth and love and need and passion and desire were pulled away, 'Remus!' Poppy chided, but he grabbed the front of Remus' shirt and pulled him down into another one of those kisses.
He pulled away only long enough to breathe, 'Bear,' and Severus was there.
'Boys!' Poppy practically shouted. They stopped kissing but didn't pull away, he and Remus gave Poppy sheepish smiles while Severus simply glared half heartedly at her.
'Tell me your name,' Poppy asked him sternly.
He gave her an incredulous look, 'Poppy, it's me, it's Harry,' he stated, Remus whimpered and pressed his face into his neck. She frowned and crossed her arms expectantly.
'Harrison James Potter, I was born July 31st, 1980, to James and Lily Potter, I was adopted two years ago by Miles and Cara Steward. I have two sons, Roddy and Bastian, I carried them, I'm pretty sure they have different fathers. I've killed Voldemort like half a dozen times, faced a Basilisk, saved my godfather only to see him die years later, competed in a tournament I was too young to compete in, studied my brains out to get my masters in defence and watched my mentor kill himself, is there anything else you want to know?' he stated, fighting to keep his anger at bay. He wasn't angry at Poppy per say he was just frustrated that he had so many memories and he couldn't organize them.
'Welcome back, Harry,' she said with a small smile, 'I just want to make sure you know who are.'
'I know,' Harry replied with an apologetic smile. 'Could you maybe run-?' he started to ask.
'I already am,' she said glancing from Remus to Severus.
'We hope you don't mind,' Remus said softly, with an apologetic smile. Harry shook his head.
'I just, I wanted to know, so I could tell them about their fathers,' he replied with a shrug.
'Take care of him boys,' she said to Remus and Severus, 'don't do anything strenuous.' She said before she turned and went back to her office.
'Come on boys,' Severus said as he scooped up first Roddy and then Bastian. They eagerly clung to him, Bastian babbling happily while Roddy simply clung to his shirt and rested his head against Severus' shoulder.
'Do you need help, or can you manage on your own?' Remus asked as he moved to help Harry anyway.
'You know a little help never went amiss,' Harry replied with a grin.
Remus hoisted Harry into his arms and carried him bridal style after Severus and the boys.
Remus and Severus put the boys to bed as Harry took a bath, as he was getting out Remus and Severus appeared in the doorway. They watched as he towelled off and pulled on a pair of sleep pants.
'Shame that,' Remus commented, Severus made a noise of agreement. Harry laughed and threw the towel at the pair.
'How are the boys?' Harry asked as he climbed into bed.
'Roddy wanted a story, Bastian wanted three,' Severus replied, causing Harry to laugh.
'Count yourself lucky, normally he wants five,' he offered with a grin.
Following Harry's example, both Remus and Severus donned sleep pants and curled around him. For a long time, they simply lay holding each other.
'I missed you,' Harry whispered softly, breaking the silence, 'I missed both of you so much,' his voice hitched as he buried himself in Severus as Remus held him tightly from behind. 'I didn't remember you but I knew I was missing something and there was an ache that nothing filled, nothing eased it. The boys helped but they weren't you.'
'We're here, Tiger,' Remus murmured as Harry sobbed, he had been holding it together fairly well but seeing them, being with them, remembering them, it had been almost too much.
Remus and Severus whispered soft nothings to Harry and each other until they fell asleep.
The next morning when Harry woke he was surrounded by warmth.
He was laying on Remus' chest with Severus wrapped against his back.
Sometime in the night one of them, either Remus or Severus because Harry hadn't, had gotten the twins. Bastian was curled against Remus and Harry figured that the extra heat from behind him was Roddy.
Harry grinned as he rubbed Bastian's back.
He was warm, inside and out, and the ache, he rubbed his chest where the ache originated, the ache was gone.
Harry yawned and settled back down against Remus, his hand on Bastian, he fell asleep almost instantly, finally content.
Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed this fic enough to leave a review, but please don't ask for it to continue, as it was just intended as oneshot. Thanks again and don't forget to vote in my unrelated poll!