Ok so I was watching Naruto on TV the other day, and I was suddenly struck by the crack Kami of inspiration! So I'm warning all of you now, this is probably totally random and stupid :D but oh well, you're reading it!
Deidara sat on the Suna Jinchuriki's corpse casually, staring at the giant rock impatiently. "Come on! When are they going to get past the damn thing un!" he complained.
Sasori shot him an annoyed glare. "Quit your bitching…"
"You don't like waiting either un!" Deidara huffed.
Sasori sighed in irritation. "Sometimes your patience is rewarded. A few minutes won't matter if our enemies are reduced by half."
"Tch, whatever you hypocrite…" Deidara scoffed as turned away from his puppet partner.
After a few more minutes of waiting Deidara started to get claustrophobic with the silence crowding the room. "Maaaaan! How long are those Konoha nin going to keep us waiting un?!"
"Just- shut up Deidara, just shut up." Sasori grumbled. If he was still human, he was sure he'd have a headache right now at the annoying blonde's complaints.
Deidara narrowed his visible eye scornfully at Sasori for a second before scoffing and looking away again stubbornly. "Tch, they're still taking too long un…"
"You should be using this time to prepare." Sasori warned, but it seemed to go through one ear and out the other with this blond.
Deidara glanced at the Suna Jinchuriki he currently sat on and the only thought that went through his mind was that he had no eyebrows. "The hell?" he mumbled to himself. Did he shave them off? Did he wax? Deidara frowned. What's be the purpose of that? A face looked… weird without eyebrows… Deidara's curiosity peaked. What did he look like with eyebrows? Deidara chuckled and wondered if he wanted to know.
"What's so funny?" Sasori asked, not really interested, but even he would admit to being a little impatient (Banzai: A little? O_o' Sasori my man, you are in denial).
"Oh nothing someone like you would be interested in un." Deidara answered vaguely as he unscrewed the cap off a marker that suddenly appeared in his hand out of nowhere.
Sasori watched with mild interest as Deidara started to scribble over the Suna Jinchuriki's face. Was he… drawing eyebrows? It was then that Sasori came over the giant revelation that the Suna Jinchuriki had no eyebrows. Did he… shave them off? Was he born that way? Who was born without eyebrows? Sasori thoughts wondered much like how his partner in crime had not two seconds ago. Of course, he'd never admit it. For him to be thinking about lack of eyebrows would be absurd. It's totally ruin his rep. And how could he afford that? He was the frikin' Phantom Puppet of Suna! Ok, so he was the only one who called himself that (secretly mind you) but he had a rep to protect! So if anyone asked, he noticed the Jinchuriki had no eyebrows a long time ago and it didn't disturb him. Not in the slightest. Nuh-uh. Who was he kidding? There were not eyebrows! What a freak!
Deidara leaned back as he scrutinized the eyebrows he'd drawn like a professional art critic. "They're crooked." Sasori said monotonously, cutting through his concentration like a knife through butter.
Deidara shot him a glare. "What the hell do you care yeah?" Geez, why did Sasori always have to dog on his art?! It got really annoying! Why the hell was he watching in the first place?!
"I don't. I'm merely pointing out that they're crooked." Sasori replied coolly. He couldn't help it. He was a perfectionist, and the Jinchuriki's left eyebrow was a little thicker than the right and was positioned at an angle that wasn't at all symmetrical to the opposite side of his face. Thought he supposed to an untrained eye they'd look the same…
"They are not un!" Deidara protested. "They're perfectly good eyebrows yeah!"
Sasori merely raised an eyebrow of his own (Banzai: Hiruko has eyebrows right? o-o'). "Whatever, it's not my fault that you lack enough artistic talent to draw simple eyebrows." he jabbed offhandedly as he pretended to ignore Deidara.
"Tch, like you have talent enough to realize how perfect myArt is Sasori-danna." Deidara scoffed. Sasori could've sworn he heard the capital on art.
"What would you know about art brat?" Sasori grumbled in annoyance.
"Fine art is the beauty of that single fleeting moment of explosion un." Deidara said as if it was simplest thing in the world. Sasori rolled his eyes from within Hiruko as Deidara finished off with his favorite catchphrase. "Art is a bang!" (Banzai: ok I know in the English dub it's explosion, but I like this better n_n)
Sasori scoffed at this brat's insolence. "Fine art is something wonderful that's left long into the future ... eternal beauty." Sasori flourished like a true artist, not like Deidara's crude explanation.
Deidara gagged dramatically. "As if un!!"
"Watch it brat." Sasori warned, his eyes narrowing dangerously.
"Tch, whatever un." Deidara dismissed and went back to doodling on the Jinchuriki's face.
"Ever heard of respect for the dead?" Sasori suddenly quipped, not at all liking how he was just dismissed like that. How dare he?!
"Hmm, you know, I don't think I have yeah." Deidara said, taking up a thoughtful pose before going back to whatever the hell he was doodling.
After a few moments, Deidara leaned back to inspect his… creation and Sasori took the opportunity to see what he'd done. "What obvious lack of creativity…" Sasori criticized.
"Tch, you're just jealous you didn't think of it first!" Deidara argued.
Sasori snorted. "Desecrating a corpse is hardly how I like to spend my time."
Deidara burst out laughing. "Ha! What a big fat stinkin' lie you hypocrite! What the hell do you call those puppets of yours yeah?!"
"Art." Sasori replied simply, cutting Deidara's laughter short.
"Art is a bang yeah!" Deidara growled.
"If you can call those white lumps of Play-Doh art." Sasori grumbled.
"Whatever yeah!" Deidara huffed before pointedly ignoring him in favor of impatiently glaring at the rock again.
Sasori merely raised an eyebrow, but said nothing. He spared one more glance at the Suna Jinchuriki. He had a mustache, lipstick, eyelashes around the dark rings around his eyes making them look like black suns, and the kanji for 'homo' next to his tattoo for 'love'. Sasori mentally scoffed, if it weren't beneath him, Sasori would have done a better and more original job. But then again, he had a rep to protect. He just wondered if the ninja would notice the Jinchuriki's face when they finally got around to barge in… What the hell was taking them?! He hated waiting…
Gaara shot his best lazerbeam glare at the Akatsuki douchebag who was sitting on his body and writing on his face as he sat on a cloud. If he wasn't dead right now he'd squish them. He knew he'd given up the addicting act of squishing people about three years ago, but he really wanted to right now…
"Yo noobie!" a man with white wings suddenly appeared next to him. "The name's Zabuza, you wouldn't have happened to see a girly looking guy fly by would you?"
Gaara blankly shook his head. He half wondered how someone like that homicidal maniac looking guy was an angel.
"Damn! Oh well…" he sighed. He finally noticed Gaara wasn't paying attention to him anymore and glaring down at the guy sitting on his corpse. "Hey, glare any longer and you'll become a ghost!" Zabuza joked, but in all reality really was warning the noobie. "You haven't been dead long have you?! Man It sucks to be you! You don't even have wings yet! I hope you're comfortable on this cloud cuz you're gunna be sittin' on it for a while!" Zabuza laughed at the noob's expense.
Gaara shot him a glare, which didn't even phase the former Demon of Kiri. Zabuza merely shrugged off the killing intent. Seriously? How was that supposed to work on a dead guy?!
Zabuza looked down and burst out laughing. "Don't worry kid, people have told me I have no eyebrows either! Mainly some loud blond gaki, but hey, look at the bright side! Would you rather have no eyebrows or Giant Caterpillars Of Doom" Zabuza suddenly made an overdramatic horrified face before becoming cheerful again in a creepy split second, "on your face!"
Gaara's immediate thoughts went to Lee and imagined his eyebrows on his face. He shuddered. Yup, it was better to have no eyebrows…
Haha, now if they showed that on TV, I'd be watching the show more often!
Rate and review! I kinda actually want to know your reactions to your daily dose of crack! XD