- Portal 2: Episode One starts here -

It was this same room where the fix was launched. Doug was in some sort of stasis. She (whoever "she" was) knew that for stasis achievement either there needs to be a Relaxation Vault or an elevator. This was just weird.

"Okay? Is there an escape prevention system?"

A barely familiar voice started talking.

"No. We're just having trouble putting people inside maps. It just fails: the maps start not working, the people duplicate, et cetera, et cetera. That's why I said "a mod". Now, as in Blue Portals there are no exits, we had to develop this teleporter. And – you still have to use it. Properly. This. Time."

"Thanks. Then I choose Portal: Stay Inside."


And after yet another ten seconds the teleport occurred. This time Chell appeared inside of a bureau with this really weird guy who was a good friend. This friend (otherwise he wouldn't be a friend) welcomed Chell.

"Hi there. I'm some guy named WinstonSmith, which is totally not a reference to George Orwell's novel 1984, or that there is one "unperson" whose removal process is currently happening in Po- I mean, this universe. I honestly don't care about anything here. Just exit and go do something else."

Chell was about to go when Winston added: "And by the way, I added the Survival Campaign if you want to try it out."

Now that corrupted entry, Chell could go out. The bureau's chamber had two doors opposite to each other. One had "north" written on it and the other one had "south" on it. Chell tried to take the south door but hit the table while walking and was shown a carpet with a green eye ornament. After somehow standing up, she decided to take the north door, but again was led to a failure as the shit sauce bed from Portal greeted her. That "bed" from Portal for some reason was A.I. enough to put Chell in stasis by itself. Her last thought was: "I never thought Portal 2: Episode One would be so short."

„So, sbrown had to fail and put Chell into the unknown while leaving me here. But nevermind that. I'M FREE! HOORAY!"

Doug Rattmann had his destiny achieved. He was out of the nightmarish facility forever for this time. He didn't even think of some "her" that was key to the achievement. The stupidest facility of all time was no longer constraining him, and "she" could go to the Android Hell.

"Okay, so that I'm out… what should I do? I'll ask an ordinary citizen," he thought. He found a bench where a citizen wanted to calm down after the day's work, sat down and said to him: "Hi."

"Who are you? I've never seen you before."

"Well, that's because only recently I escaped the Aperture Laboratories."

"Aperture Laboratories? I thought that no one going there can ever escape?"

"Well, my fellow- I mean, human Companion Cube called Chell Johnson couldn't. She is now in the unknown."

"You mean that she is dead?"

"Maybe. You will never know what a map can suggest."

"Okay… I forgot the introducement. So, who are you again?"

"I'm Doug Rattmann, the proud maintainer of the Aperture Image Format."

"Lol, I must have your program then. I have some Combine images acquired but they were encoded in this format. Then I searched for a decoder and bam, your program."

"Anyway, so I escaped and discovered that I'm famous here. But I still don't know what to do."

"Why don't you visit my house?"

"Hey, what a good idea! Of course yes!"

"If only I can remember what house it is, because the Combine don't have the street names nor the house numbers…"

"But can't you make your own ones?"

"Once the signs are put on the houses, they are almost immediately destroyed."

"And for keeping them in-mind?"

"You knew that the Combine were dickheads?"

"I knew that Aperture Science were dickheads."

"Really? Did they destroy the street names or the house numbers?"

"In Aperture Laboratories, there are no streets and no houses – only the test chambers. They have a plain number, sometimes a name of the map/creator and that's it."

"But they themselves keep them?"

"As far as I know, yes."

"See? And the Combine are dickheads enough to cypher their made-up house number under a RSA-16384 – or something like that - cypher."

"Damn. I need to write a program to decode these numbers."

"Nah; it's still enough for us to have a house number like AD6C8F002ABB987C."

"And you remember it?"

"Our society became very forgetful, but I wasn't that forgetful to remember it. But I know one secret. Don't drink their water."

"Could water be the source of forgetting?"


"I'll remember that. But, like I said, let's come to your house."

"Okay. I'll have to remember where AD6C8F002ABB987C is, though."

They stood up and walked along the Combine streets with random fixtures and a hundred thousand explosive barrels that kept exploding and destroying City 18.

"Here we are. Welcome to AD6C8F002ABB987C, or, in short, My House."

The citizen used a weird key that didn't even resemble a human key and it worked.

"Woah. I must be in Half-Life 2, as this is not what I was used to all the time," thought Doug

Then a Caucasian woman in her forties somehow teleported and said:

"The Borealis – and Aperture Science themselves – suck. I need to turn into the side of the Combine."

After a minute of silence, she added something to it.

"And also, I took Abby out of context in Portal: Prelude."