I was just about to write some more of Without Esme when I thought of this reflection.
Edward's reflection of the time just before he saw Bella;
The boredom I could not cope with.
Everyone else has someone else to cherish, to love.
I tried, briefly, to find someone but I never found THE one.
I've been alive since 1901.
I have a family.
A considerate family.
But one that does not understand.
I wish it was Carlisle with the mind reading.
Anyone else with the mind reading.
But then I did not want to burden anyone.
It was bad enough that I could go nowhere near Jasper.
And as Jasper was almost always with Alice I saw little of her too.
I couldn't stand their pity as they, and only they, knew what I was going through.
Yet they were my family I could not avoid them for long.
So I enrolled in the local high school with them to make an effort.
Not to be the 7th Wheel.
But to help anyone who needs it.
But I couldn't hide it for much longer and I knew I needed to leave.
Not permantly that would break Esme's heart.
But long enough that I let them have their alone time.
I gave myself a month.
To satisfy my need of my family.
Then I would go for how long I do not know.
But so I could use my gifts so I could help the humans.
This time it would be nothing like the last time I went before Rose.
This time no blood would be shed innocent or not.
That was the plan.
Until Bella joined Forks High.
And then I knew I had reason to stay.
Even if it did mean a temporary leave.
I would never be alone again.
Until she died.
And when that happened I would die to.
Because I had finally found something in the boredom,
A reason to stay,
Please review. Or at least let me know if you thought it was a hit or miss. If this is a success I could do more drabbles like this and expand it.