Author's Note: This is the first fanfic I have ever uploaded to anywhere. I wrote this because a friend of mine asked me to. She played through ME2 and felt that after Garrus' loyalty mission that he wouldn't have just given in to being all forgiving so quickly, especially after almost killing Sidonis.

So my friend asked me to do a story about what it should have been like, she also decided to have me throw in some drama for Garrus & Shepard to work out. There maybe some references to a MShep x Garrus pairing in later chapters; also at her request. I understand that my portrayal of Garrus & others may not be everyone's cup of tea, so just bare with it if you can.

Now, I am probably one of the worst writers out there but she liked it and told me to share it. So here it is. I will greatly appreciate any comments. Please no flames, my flameproof suit has not arrived yet.

Disclaimer: Mass Effect and its characters/dialogue belong to Bioware.


Chapter 1

The RTV (Rapid Transport Vehicle) sped along on its automated journey back to the docking area where the SSV Normandy SR-2 sat waiting.

Things were progressing smoothly as the calm skyline of the Citadel passed by. To an untrained eye, the three occupants all seemed calm almost tranquil. However, there might as well have been a raging hell storm going on for all they would have noticed.

Silence was all-encompassing inside the passenger compartment, seemingly smothering the Human, Turian, and Drell; yet none seemed willing to speak up and break this stillness.

Glancing to his left side towards his turian ally, Shepard observed him staring intensely out the side window. Garrus sat holding his rifle in crossed arms the barrel leaning gently against the window.

Only the occasional twitch of his mandibles breaking the illusion of his look of serenity. While his exterior gave off the impression of a cool, poised and collected individual in reality he could not be further from it.

His insides were a total mess, twisted up in every conceivable way. Garrus' emotions were rampaging throughout him, feelings of anger, relief, sorrow, regret, gratitude and many others are all waging their own personal war for control.

His anger was most prominent amongst them.

Anger over his situation, over letting Harkin go and just hoping he was apprehended by C-Sec, over Sidonis going free when he finally had him in his sights, not getting the justice he felt his late comrades deserved.

However, seemingly hovering above them all; he was angry with Shepard for talking him down and not allowing him to carry out his plan.

He felt that should have pulled that trigger the second he had a clear shot. To hell with what Shepard said to him, Sidonis deserved to be punished for what had happened but for some reason he just could not bring himself to do so.

He had sat there looking through his rifles scope as Sidonis walked away.

So many conflicting thoughts and feelings threatening to tear the turian apart from the inside out. However, he somehow managed to keep his charade going.

"Are you doing alright Garrus?"

"Humph" was the gruff reply that seemingly echoed as Garrus shifted slightly gripping his rifle tighter to him.

"You did the right thing back there."

Again, the turian refused to respond remaining impassive just continuing to stare, seemingly willing to burn a hole through the transparent aluminium with his gaze.

Looking into the rear-viewing mirror Shepard observed their drell compatriot sitting silently eyes closed in an almost trance like state. Shepard had seen this many times before, during and after missions that the assassin had accompanied them upon.


Thane could regularly be found in a meditative prayer aboard the Normandy. During missions he would sometimes stop what he was doing to pray after he had just made a kill often ignoring all else around him.

Thane would open his eyes from time to time to glance from the human on his right, to the turian on his left before closing them and returning to his prayer.

Thane had dealt with many humans in his career, but few possessed the same drive or tenacity.

He had witnessed the Commanders impressive combat prowess, strategic intellect, and seemingly indomitable will that pushed him onward against the odds even whilst sustaining severe injuries.

Shepard also showed equal skill outside of militaristic arenas, often intimidating individuals to settle conflict without resorting to violence or sometimes charming them to draw out information. Shepard had even deployed such talents in helping him deal with his own wayward son.

For that, Thane would forever be grateful to the human. Again, on just their latest mission Thane had witnessed Shepard use his talents to save the life of one turian and perhaps just saved the soul of another.

Focusing on the turian, he had not known him for a long time as compared to the Commander. Their interactions being somewhat limited. As their paths rarely crossed much, their majority of meetings occurred in the mess, in the comms rooms for briefings, the armory for load out or when aboard the shuttle hurtling to make planet fall.

However, Thane noticed some traits that the two shared. Both preferred to operate in the shadows, usually from a fair distance, both were excellent sharpshooters, both kept to themselves aboard the Normandy. One of the most striking similarities they shared was the pain of loss.

For Thane it was the loss of his beloved wife. For Garrus it was the loss of his squad, his friends.

Now it was they both had set out to settle a score with those responsible. Thane he had gotten what wanted but it had cost him much in return.

However, fate seemed would have it that for Garrus things would not be the same.

Closing his eyes and clearing his mind, he returned to his meditation as the transport continued onward.


Shepard again looked over to Garrus, eyeing him carefully doing his best to read his body language and gain an understanding of what he was currently thinking. However, turians are harder to read than the other two main Council species of the Asari and Salarians.

Their angular facial features, made up of the naturally 'armored' skin were not as expressive as that of the asari, salarian or other humans.

Still they were easier to read than that of the Elchor, and the impossible to read Volus and Quarian tucked away in their environmental suits.

Nonetheless, subtle hints are there for those with a keen eye to notice and it was at times like this; that Shepard was quite grateful for the Alliance Militaries training drilling an attention to detail into him.

'What is going inside that mind of yours Garrus?'

For Garrus the ride could not end soon enough, he too had been trained to pay attention to detail in ones surroundings and with his sharper turian senses; he was doing a far better job at reading the Commander's body language than he was doing of him.

Being cooped up like this was driving him nuts. Currently he just wanted to get away from everybody back to the main battery room and just be alone once again. He especially wished to be away from Shepard.

His attention was taken away from his warring emotions and the human, when perceived the RTV was making final approach toward the docking area.

"What's going with you Garrus?" Shepard said as the craft came to stop lowering itself down onto the landing pad.

"There is nothing to talk about Shepard." the turian cast over his shoulder stepping out of the RTV followed by Thane who quickly disappeared into the crowd.

Shepard made some kind of rebuttal remark but it seeming fell on deaf ears, as Garrus did not reply he merely shrugged off the comment placing his rifle on his back before heading off in the direction of the Normandy.

Striding smoothly Garrus made his way through the crowds of people as they traveled to whatever was their destination. He noticed personnel coming and going, supply crews delivering goods, maintenance going about their jobs. In addition, some were just crews shipping out others returning from whatever their mission had been.

Glancing around him, Garrus could make out the C-Sec personnel scanning over the crowds following their patrols.

"Garrus."

He could hear Shepard calling amongst the hustle and bustle of the masses.

'If I can make it to the ship quick enough I might be able to make it inside before he does.'

Few paid the turian any attention as he passed by them. He pushed his way through the crowd of people, almost knocking over several who were in his way. He knew Shepard would undoubtedly stop to help up those he had knocked down.

"That should buy me some time."

Garrus did not wish to intentionally harm them but right now if they could used to buy him a bit more of a lead on the Commander then it was worth it. Glancing over his shoulder Garrus saw the Commander currently helping a uniformed salarian gather up some datapads he had dropped when he has pushed his way by.


Shepard kept his eyes on the turian making his way through the crowds, pushing a few people out of his way as he went along.

This was far from normal behavior for Garrus; something had to be serious to get him to act in such as fashion. He always seemed to hold himself in a poised respectful manner, but since the encounter with Fade and then Sidonis.

Garrus had seemed troubled and Shepard wished to help his friend.

Weaving between the flow of Citadel patrons as they went about their routines. Shepard followed as close as he could.

Noticing the increasing speed at which Garrus seemed to be traveling as he drew nearer. He was closing in when Garrus had bumped into a salarian carrying an almost absurd amount of datapads.

The salarian stumbled for a moment before losing his hold upon the majority of pads as they rained down.

"Such rude behavior for a turian, inexcusable."

"Let me help you with that."

"Ah, thank you human."

Stopping the Commander knelt down and began to gather what pads he could, returning them to the original owner. With a quick nod the salarian stood back up hurrying along his way in a typical salarian manner.

Though the delay was brief, it was enough to give Garrus a good lead. Leaving Shepard to once again duck and weave through the masses in an attempt to catch up.