This really isn't me- but it... ended up like this anyway. Haha. Hope you enjoy.
Warning, dirty stuff about, but nothing seriously... dirty... really happens. Supposedly comedic.
Takes place when Mustang is stationed in the east, a little after he got his little group together and quite before the Fullmetal alchemist came into the picture.
"Why is the Colonel so blind?? It's so obvious that the Lieutenant likes him, right??" Havoc shouted, stabbing his fork in the direction of a poor glasses clad man. Dangerously close too.
This was one of the days when said Colonel was in Central, accompanied by his Lieutenant-slash-assistant-slash-babysitter-slash-perfect-girl-for-him-in-everyone's opinion. They'd be returning to the East that afternoon.
Meanwhile, the rest of his direct subordinates were at the local breakfast place.
"Really? She likes-likes him?" a wide-eyed Fuery asked.
Everyone else rolled their eyes.
"Who would look after that lazy bum of a commanding officer if they didn't love him?" Breda gulped his coffee down.
"The colonel returns her feelings too. He just doesn't show them." Falman put in, grabbing the bottle of syrup from the hands of the confused Fuery.
"But then how did you conclude he has feelings for her?" Fuery's eyebrows scrunched up.
"Looking at them, you just know." Breda stuffed another pancake into his mouth.
"The colonel is probably just in denial, dating all those girls..." said Havoc as he lit up his first cigarette of the day. "Including my ex-girlfriends." he sighed.
Riza blinked at the pink piece of paper she found. It was folded up, stuck underneath some papers on her desk, and PINK.
Not that it was the color that disturbed her. Just a little bit.
It was more of the content that puzzled her.
"Roses are red, Violets are blue, Lieutenant Hawkeye, I think I'm in love with you." -M
'M... Musta...' The thought came, unbidden. On her cheeks appeared the slightest of blushes, but her expression did not betray her.
Yes, it was a pleasant surprise. But when the rest of Colonel Mustang's team was watching through the window, in some bushes, it automatically became pretty hard to believe.
She sighed, took out a pistol and aimed, single handedly firing four shots at the glass window.
Boy were Second Lieutenant Havoc, Second Lieutenant Breda, Warrant Officer Falman and Master Sergeant Fuery glad that the window was bulletproof.
"I can't think of any reason why she wouldn't want to receive a letter from a secret admirer!" the lieutenant exclaimed, exasperated. He lit a cigarette.
"It's not that she didn't like it. She's too sharp for her own good. She realized it was us. Lt. Havoc, put that out. We're in the middle of a mission, not to mention in the middle of shrubbery. You might start a fire." the redheaded second lieutenant put in.
"I guess she thinks it's a prank..." the young communications expert sighed.
"Way to state the obvious, kid." said the older warrant officer. "But we're not giving up just yet."
The next day, Colonel Mustang discovered a dozen red roses on his desk. They were beautiful. And weren't really intended for him.
"Flowers?" A surprised Lt. Hawkeye exclaimed. She had arrived with him.
"They're for a certain 'R' from 'M'" Roy Mustang read off the note. "Who's M? Maria? Mary? Milly? Or Meredith?" he contemplated, seemingly unaware of his lieutenant's sudden uncomfortable disposition.
"Sir, I'll... fetch a vase for them, sir." Riza continued and left the room again.
The others then filed in, surprised to see their smug looking superior with the bunch of roses that was meant to be for a certain 'R'.
R for Riza.
"I found them on my desk." -his answer when questioned.
"The stupid delivery guy! He assumed it was for the Colonel??" Breda cursed, careful to keep his voice down. "We know R can stand for both Riza and Roy, but..."
"Wouldn't it be more logical to deliver them to Lt. Hawkeye?" Feury asked.
"What sort of girl would send a dozen red roses to a guy?? Even if he is the Colonel!!!" Havoc exclaimed out loud.
"My thoughts exactly." came a voice from the doorway.
"Lt. Hawkeye?? When did you..." they panicked.
"Yes? Here's the vase, Colonel. I added water to it too."
The next day, everyone discovers that the roses seem to have withered and dried up overnight.
"I guess Lt. Hawkeye added something more than water. I'd say some Sodium Hypochloride or some other effective plant killer." Falman said under his breath.
"Aw, man. We've got to come up with something better! The flowers sucked." Havoc complained.
"What about a meeting? A... Date?" Fuery said excitedly.
"Whoa, kid. You're way too enthusiastic. Weren't you the one having doubts before?" Breda chuckled.
"Yes, sir! But that was before you opened my eyes. They're so totally meant for each other. It's so soap opera like that he's her boss, so it's forbidden love and that he's a well known womanizer but she can't help having feelings for him anyway!" Fuery grinned, sparkly eyes and everything.
"Okay kid, tone it down. You're getting kinda freaky." Havoc stared at the younger officer.
Meet me at the Italian Restaurant in the fancy hotel six blocks from your apartment at 8:30pm tonight? The one on 12th street. Will be waiting at the table in the corner. -M
Riza stared at the (pink!) paper, crumpled it in her hand, and left the office quietly.
The four, who were trying watch Riza as discreetly as possible, looked up from their paperwork and grinned at each other.
"We've captured the hawk, so let's take this mustang for a ride."
"Nice code names, Lt. Havoc."
"Shut up, Breda."
She sighed. A blind date? With a secret admirer? 'This could be a prank.' she thought as she remembered the four guys watching her that time, and every other time, seemingly plotting something sinister. Were they trying to set her up with someone? If so, why not ask her straight up? Of course, she would've probably refused. So they resort to trickery? She sighed.
But what was there to lose? She was single, and free for the night. God knows she never had any social life, besides her friends in the military.
She wondered if this M was a soldier. Then this would violate the law on fraternization. She sighed again.
She'd never get what she really wanted anyway, so... 'Blind date it is.'
Did you like the flowers Roy? I've some interesting information for you, but only if you'll meet me in the Italian restaurant in that fancy hotel on 12th street. About 8:15pm? Ask for M's table. Your treat, kay? -M
The Colonel smiled, intrigued. He discovered the crisp pink piece of paper on his desk that afternoon. The lieutenant had gone home early, surprisingly. And the other four were, again, surprisingly, working overtime. He left them, saying he had a date with the flower sender.
Havoc didn't look as jealous as usual. In fact, the four subordinates looked positively gleeful. Did they know who this M was? Who was she? For once, it wasn't someone he asked out- she'd done the asking. So why not? She could turn out to be drop dead gorgeous, or a pretty decent girl at least.
"M's table? Oh, this way, sir." the waitress could not help but blush when Mustang, in all his semi-formal button-down shirt goodness, greeted her politely and asked for his table.
"I assume you're Mr. M?" She smiled accommodatingly. "Your date is a very lucky girl."
"Huh?" Mustang was thoroughly confused. "No, I'm not M. Actually, I'm here to meet her. It's a sort of blind date." he explained slowly.
"M is a lady? But I could've sworn it was a guy who called and reserved the table earlier... Guess I was wrong. I'm sorry, mister. She prepared a lot for this, I'm sure, so please enjoy." as she left.
Mustang was dumbstruck with the information he recently discovered.
He tried to process it. Tried.
'M is a guy???'
'He sent me flowers. Flowers.'
'and he asked me out on a date???'
He remembered to close his mouth- it dropped slightly in the course of his... thought processing.
'So, no drop dead gorgeous M?'
Drop dead gorgeous, yeah right. The phrase had gone through Riza's head as she got ready for her "date". It would be quite the fancy place, she knew, as she passed the high end hotel on her way to and from work.
She wore a navy blue halter dress that hugged her waist and flowed down 'til the knees. Rebecca had convinced her to buy it, as she looked 'Drop dead gorgeous' in it, the girl's exact words. Not that she really believed the obvious exaggeration. She topped it off with a leather jacket, that didn't go with her dress at all, but she'd take it off later.
Finally, she could not contain her curiosity anymore. It was 8:15pm, and she grabbed her purse.
Some money, check.
Pistol, fully loaded, safety locked, check.
Riza Hawkeye never really felt the need for pepper spray.
'Wish me luck, Black Hayate.' she half smiled as she closed the door to her apartment and started walking.
Roy Mustang was torn between staying put to wait or tearing the hell away out of there. Before he could make a decision, or think about it clearly, he was distracted by a blonde with a great hourglass figure, even from behind. With the way her hair was put in a bun, she looked achingly familiar. He just couldn't place it.
The girl turned, and imagine his surprise when he saw she had a name tag. 'Lucy' was a waitress. Pretty enough. He smiled and called her over.
'Would you know who called to reserve this table tonight?' He asked her in his deep voice.
Obviously attracted to the guy, she put on a huge smile and answered him, "Ms. M, I think. They called earlier for a reservation at 8:15. I wonder why she isn't here yet."
"You're sure it was a girl?"
"Well... Her voice wasn't that high, it sounded quite neutral. I couldn't really tell, sorry." She apologized.
That's it, he decided.
"Well, she's not here yet..." he said.
"Yes, we'll bring her to your table as soon as she arrives, sir."
He smirked. "Then for the meantime, how would you like to join me-"
"Over here, Miss. He's been waiting for quite a while now." another waitress popped up.
Mustang glanced at his 'date'. Lean legs, dress up to her knees. 'Dang, too long,' he thought, somewhat disappointed. At least it was a girl. He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding.
Then he looked up at her face and what he saw shocked him ridiculously.
Riza Hawkeye could not believe her eyes. The Colonel, her boss, was seated at the table the waitress led her to.
She found herself unable to speak, and the two waitresses took the sudden awkward silence as a cue to leave.
Roy Mustang stood up, wide-eyed.
"S... Sir." She stuttered.
"You're 'M'???" they both exclaimed at the same time.
He chuckled but she still did not crack a smile. It seemed Riza was really surprised.
"Did you write this?" She plucked a slightly crumpled piece of paper from her bag and showed it to him.
He raised his eyebrow at the familiar color. He picked a similar looking folded up note from his pants pocket and handed it to her.
"This 'M' isn't you, Colonel?"
"Oh please, call me Roy, Riza. And no, M does not stand for Mustang, definitely. 'She' was the one who invited me here"
She brushed off the first statement. "Sir, 'He' was the one who's been sending me letters, and asked me out too."
"I got that note this afternoon. I was so intrigued that I postponed my date with Dianna-"
She tensed up at his words. "Then sir, since this is clearly a mistake, a silly prank, please, call up Dianna-" she said the name as if in pain, "-right now. She could still be free. I'm sorry to ruin your night, Colonel Mustang." She turned to leave.
She couldn't think clearly. Her eyesight clouded up with unshed tears. 'No, Riza Hawkeye does not cry in public. Scratch that, Riza Hawkeye does not cry, period.' she told herself.
"Wait!" The familiar voice practically commanded. She froze in her tracks, following orders out of habit. He grabbed her shoulders firmly and turned her around. She looked down, not wanting her superior to see...
"Riza, are you alright? It might be a prank, but I'm glad you turned up. There's no one else I'd rather spend the night with." he told her while shaking her shoulders a bit.
She laughed softly, and sighed. 'What a liar. He does know how to make a woman feel good, doesn't he?' she swiped at her eyes. He let go of her, and she looked up, her expression unreadable again.
"Alright." she agreed. "It's just dinner..."
"Not a date? I came fully prepared to sweep the girl off her feet!" he half joked.
"Then I hope I'm good enough for tonight. You must have been expecting someone totally different." she said nonchalantly, as she took her seat on the chair Mustang pulled back for her.
"You're better than anyone I imagined." he leaned in from behind and whispered into her ear.
She blushed as her heart started to beat unnaturally faster. It seemed it would be quite difficult for her to put up her usual facade that night.
They ordered- she a simple Carbonara pasta and he some seafood kind.
An awkward silence followed as Riza kept her eyes on her wineglass, tilting it 'round and 'round with Roy watching her, quite amused.
"So who do you think planned all this?" he said, to break the silence.
She looked up, "I have a list of suspects, sir."
"I told you not to call me that, Riza! We aren't at work. You used to call me by name before." he frowned.
"Sir, that was before I joined the military, sir. And even then, when you were studying with father, I always called you Mr. Mustang. You were the one who called me Riza, sir."
"You're right... Just, drop the formalities, okay? Please call me Roy. That's an order, Lieutenant." he smiled.
"Wait a second." she suddenly grabbed a pen from her purse like she just realized something. On a table napkin, she wrote:
'Sir, our table's bugged.' she handed it to him.
He read it, then took the pen.
She read: 'Roy, not sir. And by who?'
'It's the type of bug used in our department- Msgt. Fuery's. Sir, they're spying on us.'
He read this in amusement. So his subordinates were behind all this. Then a plan came to him.
'Play along.' he scribbled back.
Before she could ask-
"Riza, let's drop the act- we're alone again. Nobody's listening." He stared into her eyes, smirking.
She was surprised. But she realized soon enough this was to get back at her sneaky co-workers.
"Al- Alright. I guess I'm just uncomfortable..."
"So, when do you think Havoc, Breda, Falman and Fuery will find out?" he said in a straight face.
"Find out what, ...Roy?"
"They won't suspect a thing, if we keep acting the way we do and if we keep our meetings... as clandestine as... we always have." she smiled weakly.
At that moment, they heard a snort, like someone spitting out their drink. The four were apparently spying on them from nearby. The two were careful not to look in that direction.
Funny, the idea of an audience made her more confident.
"This is new, isn't it, Roy?"
"Us together- out on a date."
He smiled slyly as he placed his elbow on the table and his palm below his chin. "What do you say we skip this and go straight to your house as usual, Riza?"
"I don't think..." She stuttered out at the suggestion, then regained her confidence when she remembered they were being listened to. "But Roy, somebody went through all this trouble to get us together for dinner."
"I don't want to wait any longer! This is boring. I want to go have some real fun."
"And what kind of fun have you got in mind?" she questioned, a bit curious
"Oh, I'd rather show you than explain." Roy looked at her and licked his lips in a way that made her feel... She pinched herself mentally.- 'He's acting. This in all an act.' she thought, suddenly self conscious again.
Silence reigned at the table for four- where four men were not really eating, but instead, were waiting with bated breath for their commanding officer to... elaborate further.
'Relax.' he wrote on the napkin.
"Let's just have these wrapped up and leave! I can't wait to-"
"Now now, behave Roy, you're acting like a child."
He smirked when he realized she'd interrupted him to keep him from saying anything about his 'plans' when they got back to her place, but before he could reply, she suddenly glared at him: "And take your hand away from under there! We're in public!" she said, scolding.
His left hand, previously on his lap, unconsciously reached for a fork on top of the table.
They heard a chorus of gasps and a certain smoker's snickering.
Even he raised an eyebrow at her daring statement.
After his suggestions, his subordinates' imaginations were probably going crazy. Who knew what they were thinking now? After all that time he had spent in their company, he knew just how perverted their minds could be.
She shrugged and actually grinned in return. She was having fun.
He laughed at that and this was when he crushed the bug with his fist.
"What do you mean, lost?"
"Get it back!!! Now!"
"Augh! What are they doing over there?"
-The two heard from somewhere in the restaurant.
"Finally. Privacy. I think that was the best way to leave 'em hanging." the Colonel smiled.
"I'd hate to explain when we get back to work..."
"We don't. They're gonna be curious about it, but we'll leave 'em wondering."
"I wonder why they set this all up..."
"Isn't it obvious? So you could date me? I know you've always had a little crush on me." he smirked.
"What? I- no!" she spit out. God, this was embarrassing.
"Then I was just imagining those 'Mrs. Riza Mustang' doodles in your notebooks? I found them on the dinner table one night."
"That was in junior high school!" she turned red.
"And so... Now, no more?" he asked worriedly.
She shook her head.
"Ah... Well, too bad. You know what, I used to imagine us together when we grew up. You know, living together." He laughed.
She looked at him disbelievingly.
"Your dad hated it when I spent time with you. I think he was just jealous."
"If he even wanted to even spend time with me." she said softly.
He sighed. "He cared about you, you know? That's why he always kept me away from you by giving me stuff to study. He even told me that his number one rule was that I was never to 'touch his daughter' if I didn't want to be toasted like marshmallows on a stick. I didn't think 'touching' meant something else entirely."
"Oh... Yes... Then you wouldn't play with me anymore- tag or wrestling or anything. Then I started poking you and 'accidentally' bumping into you because every time I did, you'd shout something like, 'I touched you! Mr. Hawkeye's gonna kill me!' until you realized he wasn't really going to roast you alive." she laughed at the memory.
"That went on for months, didn't it? You were so carefree back then- and so was I. Sometimes I wish we could just go back."
"I remember you used to pick apples for me and dad and I'd make apple pie for both of you, back then."
"Ah, you weren't good at that at all. Your father would always make me finish the rest of the pie- I don't think he could stand more than one slice at a time."
"Hey, I got better at it, gradually."
"And you never failed to bring me a mug of hot chocolate every night, when you saw me working really hard at studying alchemy."
"You weren't working hard, Roy. You were always slacking around. Just like you do now." she smiled.
"I missed you, Riza. After I became a state alchemist and your father passed away... You never returned my letters anymore. Where were you the whole time? Military Academy?"
"Actually, yes. My grandfather turned out to be a soldier, and I wanted to enlist..."
"What made you decide to?"
"Because of someone."
"Who? Oh, your grandpa?"
"No, someone else."
"It's my fault you enlisted, isn't it? I told you about all of my dreams about the future of this country. I didn't count on all the war that'll supposedly get us there... I should've been enough. Now your hands are stained with blood. You didn't have to..."
"...It was my choice, Roy."
"I wish you never gotten into this mess. The military..."
"We wish for a lot of stuff, but most of the time we've just got to make do with what we already have on our hands."
"Still, I wish you never enlisted."
They ate their dinner in silence for the rest of the night.
She wondered if that last sentence meant he found her presence a bother, all those years.
The lieutenant then offered to accompany the colonel to his home, but he insisted he should be the one to walk with her to her home.
"Are you sure, sir?"
"Yes, it's fine Riza. And please, stop with the sir."
"I can't help it... Roy," she smiled a small smile.
They walked under the moonlit sky to her apartment building.
"Goodnight and thank you, sir." Riza said, nodding her head slightly in appreciation when they reached her door on the third floor.
"What, no goodnight kiss?" he joked.
She blushed unconsciously and immediately turned away.
Suddenly, he was impelled to gently take her face in one hand, place the other around her waist, and softly press his lips against hers.
She kissed him back.
He then pulled back and stared straight into the reddish brown eyes that belonged to the person he held dearest to him.
"Sir..." she was still kind of surprised. Both at his and her own actions.
"You know what, Riza? I realize... I don't regret you joining the military after all. You were still innocent and untainted by this... But it was inevitable, because I wouldn't trust anybody else with my back. You're the most capable person for the job. So, please, continue to do your best, Lieutenant." he said, all serious now.
"Sir, yes... Sir." she saluted him.
He acknowledged it then turned to walk down the hallway.
She smiled to herself- he did want her around, after all.
'I wish you never enlisted- because then I'd have already asked you to marry me.' he voiced out loud his thoughts once he was sure he was out of anyone's hearing range.
Stupid fraternization laws. Those were definitely near, if not the top of the list of reforms he was going to enact immediately when he became Führer.
Four pairs of eyes watched warily as Colonel Roy Mustang entered the office with Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye in tow. The colonel suddenly dropped the lieutenant's hand, the four barely catching it.
"Yes, men? You seem like you want to me ask something." the colonel smirked.
"Sir, no, sir." all four squeaked.
"Oh yes, boys, I've been notified about your behavior for the past few days-" Riza took this time to speak.
"Warrant officer Falman, please refrain from using the military phone line to make personal calls. You've been recorded as calling to the East city Florist, and the hotel on 12th street, not for any military reasons, unless you'd like to explain."
The older guy paled.
"Second Lieutenant Breda, unauthorized missions are prohibited- especially when spying on fellow officers."
The redhead gulped.
"Speaking of unauthorized, Master Sergeant Fuery, espionage equipment is only to be used in official military missions, please remember that."
The timid guy looked scared enough to piss in his pants.
"Second Lieutenant Havoc, I think you should know that possessing a pad of pink paper may significantly decrease your chances of getting a girlfriend."
A cigarette dropped onto the floor.
"And Colonel Mustang-" she continued in her serious tone.
Everyone turned their full attention to her this time-
"How would you like to come over to have dinner at my place tonight?"
"You know I want more than just dinner, lieutenant." he smirked.
"Of course, sir." she replied without batting an eyelid.
They both resisted the urge to laugh at their subordinates' utterly flabbergasted expressions.
"I must admit, the holding hands just before entering was a nice touch, sir." she laughed.
"Well, your admonition of them was nothing short of spectacular, either. You sure know how to hit them hard, Lieutenant Hawkeye."
"My pleasure, sir. I'm glad the men came up with the silly idea of setting us up on a fake date. I think I'm going to enjoy work for the next few weeks."
"Oh yes, I love the way you invited me here for dinner." I only wish the second part were real. He added in his mind.
She smiled, proud of herself.
"By the way, your apple pie has improved greatly." he complimented as he took a huge chunk of apple pie from the dessert plate she brought out. "I guess I'll have to be the one who finishes the whole pie, as usual." he added, looking quite the opposite of remorseful.
"Thanks, ...Roy." she said as she gazed at her commanding officer, her childhood friend, her recently rediscovered best friend, and in the future, hopefully, something more...
I might make a second part. Tell me what you think? :)