Disclaimer: I do not own any characters from the Kick-Ass comic or film written by Mark Miller, or any guest characters from other Kick-Ass fanfic's they are owned by their own writers and creators. However, all rights and characters for Omega Kid belong to me and are owned by me alone. So if anyone wants to ever use any characters or anything else from this story for a special chapter or fic will have to ask first...but don't worry, there's a 99% chance I'll say yes.
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The Beginning Arc
Chapter 1: Why Not Me?
Everyone in the world dreams of being a superhero! It's our nature to wish we were better, and to show the world that we could stop the bad guys, get the girl and save it just like in the comics. Only problem is this isn't the comic world where you either get bitten by radioactive insects or hit by gamma bombs to acquire supernatural powers. Nope, this is the real world. A world where all we can do is live, eat, sleep, dream and die. I always thought that's what my life would be like, until that night!
It started off uneventful; going to school, doing homework, playing God of War III, and then I decided to search YouTube to see if there was any news of a UK release of the new season of Heroes. During my search I saw a video titled 'wannabe superhero'. I decided to check it out, see how cheap-budget this fan video was, and I was blown away. It was news footage of a kid dressed in a green swimsuit fighting off three thugs with nothing but two batons and a will to never back down. It was intense, he was getting knocked down time and time again. The three that were on him didn't hold back on the punches, even across a computer screen I could feel the force of the hits that were dishing out, but it was like this kid was inhuman, he took them all in his stride and rose back onto his fight to take them all on once more. It got to the point where the three thugs had to scurry off, like defeated dogs with their tails between their legs, meanwhile, this superhero had no concern for his well-being, only for the battered guy he was protecting from the thugs. Unbelievable is the first word that comes to my mind, followed by amazing.
In the months that followed, that kid named Kick-Ass became a sensation. All around the world; Kick-Ass comics, costumes and every single merchandising known to man. And it wasn't long until more heroes popped up, all inspired to fight crime and protect the innocent. The first one that really stood out was Red Mist, but he didn't last long, disappearing just as quickly as he arrived on the scene. During news round one night, Kick-Ass and some Batman impersonator had been kidnapped, and were saved by a little girl in a costume. Kick-Ass, Red Mist and the other two heroes haven't been seen since, but that hasn't stopped other heroes appearing everywhere in America. All kinds of costumes, wacky names and personalities, it was incredible...but you know what would be more incredible? If that actually happened over here in the UK.
Speaking of which, I've kinda forgot to introduce myself, the name is Thomas Lanks, your normal 15 year old living in London. Nothing really special about me; going to the cinema, playing video games, and still waiting for Arsenal Football Club to win something. At school, I wasn't really the most unknown kid at school, but I didn't have any real friends either cause I didn't stand out at anything. I wasn't the smartest so no one needed my help with school work, and I wasn't the most athletic so I wasn't part of any of the school's sports teams. Everyone just looked over me, I did get the occasional taunt sometime, but even the bullies got bored of me cause I was unknown.
Outside of school is where things were better for me. I had the two best friends anyone could ever hope for, the brothers, Alex and Stephen Columbus. They considered me like another brother since our mothers were best friends growing up, and so the three of us grew up together pretty close. Alex and I were born within a week of each other, me just edging out on him, while Stephen is three years younger. Although when Alex and I get into our arguments, Steph seems to be the most mature out of the three of us.
My parents...died in a car accident when I was about four. I can't remember anything from it, but apparently I was involved in the crash, I was the lucky one, if you could call it that. It's still scary to think about at times, not knowing how or why it happened. Since then, I've moved about with other relatives, aunts and uncles, until finally my older sister Jenna turned 18, and she could become my new and permanent legal guardian. What can I say about Jenna? She's a big pain, but I love her anyway, and although I've never really said it to her, I admire her never-say-die attitude. Her records show countless job interviews, all turned down because of her grades from college are not quite making 'the right impression'.
I do really want her to succeed and make something of herself, but in times of recession and a lot of unemployment for older teens, it's hard if you don't seem to have that special something. She does have at least one job to help pay the bills she's still getting use to though, working at a local comic book shop, Comic-City. It was ironic a few months back when she came home to say she had her first job at a comic store while I was sitting in my bedroom reading them. Another neat thing was it gave Alex, Steph and I a place to hang out and talk...or more often arguing.
As in right now, with me sitting on the other side of one of the tables while they went on and on about whatever face-off came to mind.
''I'm telling you Doomsday would own Hulk!''
''No way, Hulk would destroy him!''
''Oh my days...Thomas who would win?''
Normally when these two couldn't win an argument they would ask me because I know a lot more about comics than they did. ''Well, if Doomsday dies he just comes back and becomes immune to what killed him last time. But Hulk, if angry, could have unlimited power...'' Alex and Steph just sat there on the opposite side of the table from me, waiting in anticipation for my brilliant answer. ''Don't know!'' I said bluntly.
They both looked at me astounded I didn't have an answer. ''What's up with you? You haven't been yourself all day!''
He was right, I haven't. I don't know what it was, but this morning I just woke up and...couldn't think about comics anymore, not when the real thing was happening in the real world right now. ''Just...''
I trailed off trying to think of what to say, until I noticed Alex give a little smirk to Steph and look back over to me. ''Did someone think about Rachael again last night?''
Oh God, I can't believe he used the Rachael card on me. Hoping that my cheeks weren't as red as I feared I stuttered back at him. ''What? No...no...why would I think about her?''
This time, it was Stephen's turn to answer. ''Because you've had a crush on her for years.'' Another trait he expressed the most out of the three of us, answering rhetorical questions.
Rubbing my head, not wanting to think about Rachael on top of other things I finally told them my thoughts. ''It has nothing to do with Rachael. It's about these real-life superheroes!''
Their eyebrows raised simultaneously, as they gave each other a quick glanced before asking at the same time. ''What about them?''
''Well...how come we still talk about the ones in the comics, and never the actual heroes in real life?''
Alex was the one to reply. ''They aren't really superheroes though, they have no real powers. Also comic book characters last decades, while a real-life hero gets the crap kicked out of them within the first few hours. It's a meme Thomas, this superhero fade is going to die down soon, hopefully before the heroes actually die themselves. Ever since Kick-Ass and Red Mist disappeared, I don't think there's been another hero that's lasted a single day.''
Steph clicked his fingers to get our attentions. ''Actually there was that guy in Boston I heard about...I think the name was...Captain Great!'' Stephen said, of course, seeing as how that guy was his favourite hero for a brief period of time.
Alex just replied back. ''Yeah everyone's heard about him...because he got locked up in a psycho hospital after saying things like Area 51 and the Force is real!'''
''I thought you believed in that stuff?'' I pointed out.
He shrugged his shoulders. ''I believe in some paranormal stuff, but Area 51 is too much!''
''What about the Loch Ness Monster?'' Steph asked.
As the queries rolled off of Steph's tongue as quickly as Alex's answers, I couldn't help but laugh. They were the only people I know who could drag a conversation about real-life superheroes to cryptozoology. As they went on, I stared out of the window, looking down towards the street that leads towards Central London. It find the sight surreal sometimes, the surroundings close-by were nothing out of the ordinary, run down buildings and shops with graffiti all over. Further down though, tall glass buildings with cranes all around building some kind of new development. It's like looking at two different worlds, it makes me think of how different it must be in America where there are superheroes popping up all the time...and then that's when it dawned on me. ''How come no one in England has tried being a superhero?''
The brothers had finally ceased with their conspiracy theories and turned to me. ''Huh?''
''How come there are so many superheroes appearing around the world, but none over here in the UK?''
It seemed like they gave my question some thought, however it lasted no longer then a few seconds as Alex looked back to me. ''Because we don't see it as a fad over here!''
''A fad?'' I repeated, making sure that he was sure he was using the right word.
He nodded in confirmation. ''Yeah. America loves a good story to report. This is the 21st century, you no longer have to be special to become a celebrity, just do something stupid and have a lot of people know about it. But also it's common sense. If anyone tried it, they end up dead in hours!''
''That still doesn't answer my question, why hasn't anyone tried?''
''Cause...because...'' He stumbled a bit trying to piece together the right sentence. ''It's a different place! People don't know what to expect, and so they're afraid that it might be impossible to achieve something, and by then it might be too late to quit!''
I considered his words, and it made a lot of sense. Alex, at first, may not seem like the type to offer helpful advice, but in actuality, he's one of the wisest I know. The amount of helpful advice he's given me is only equal to the amount of arguments he's given me.
When it seemed like the subject of real-life superheroes had hit a stalemate, Steph went back to the other matter that needed addressing with Alex. ''Okay what about mermaids?''
''Fake!'' Alex answered in no time at all, before his forehead creased heavily and he then slapped Steph across the head. ''Mermaids? Are you serious? That's just stupid!''
''Ow!'' Steph whimpered. After a quick rub of his head, he went back to the crypto quiz as if nothing's happened. ''Ghosts in the mirror?''
Despite not getting anywhere with how I felt about this real-life superhero business, I couldn't help but smile at the two. Not really needed anymore, I just got up and went over to the stands, hoping that another comic would take my mind off this subject...but the thoughts only intensified. Looking to see which comic I hadn't read yet, another thought came to me, what was it like to be a citizen living in the comic world? It must be amazing watching all those heroes using their powers to save the world. It's almost identical to the real world right now, wishing you had the power to do some good in the world. That's when it dawned on me, wasn't Kick-Ass thinking the very same think I am now? Wasn't everyone else who dared to put on the spandex thinking they could be superheroes so much that they went out and did it? They must have, you could only do something like that if you really though it through, and if they did it...
''Why not me?''
In the next few weeks, it seemed like my life had changed forever, I was transformed into someone new. Instead of playing video games, I was down the gym training and weightlifting 24/7...at least I would have been if the prices weren't through the roof. So whenever I could, I turned my room into a training camp. When I was reading comics or watching superhero films, I wasn't watching or reading for the campy dialogue or beautiful female leads, I was watching and reading for tips on good battle styles and tactics…and yes okay, a few campy one liners, but depending on how you say them, they can sound awesome!
Something else that I added to my reading list were the newest Percy Jackson books, and any martial arts training books I could find. If there were none of those, boxing books, just anything that had to do with some kind of physical training I needed to read. Jenna did ask me on occasion why I seemed to take the sudden interest in wanting to build myself up, maybe she thought I was being bullied and was learning to fight back, as much as I would like that, I still think I needed to have actual biceps to do that. Saying that though, only a month after I dedicated myself to this, I could finally see a bit of muscle on myself, I was learning fast. Constantly getting stronger, running faster, learning quicker, I even started to feel a bit of confidence grow in me! In the superhero version of my world, I felt like king of the world, but of course there is one fatal flaw superheroes have...
''Thomas, come on down or you'll be late...again!''
There is a human version of their world they have to come back to, and mine was going to school! I just wanted to get this day over with quick like the rest, and get back to training. Making my way into the kitchen, it was too easy to grab a bit of Jenna's toast while she wasn't there. I made a quick dash to the door, smooth sailing...until an 18 year old, female version of myself stands at the door, waiting for me like a hunter waiting for its prey...and the hunter in question I call Jenna.
Grabbing the piece of toast from my mouth, she smirks at me. ''You can buy your own food at school.''
''It's just a piece of toast.''
''So then you can wait to buy some food at school,'' She proceeded to eat the toast in my face before checking her watch and running to check herself in the mirror. ''I need to eat before my interview today.''
''Oh yeah,'' That reminded me. Quickly checking through my bag, I finally found what I was looking for and handed it to her. ''Good luck with that.''
Curiously, she takes the item from me, and upon further inspections, gives me a warm smile. ''A good luck card? Aw, that's so...'' She stops mid-sentence and gives me a dirty look. ''Okay what are you after?''
Oh crap, she's got me out! Play dumb. ''What? Can't a brother be nice to his sister?''
''What do you want?''
She's not buying it, abort! Might as well ask. ''Can we have pizza tonight?''
''Only if I get the job!'' At least there was a chance. With that out of the way, she gives me a quick goodbye hug. ''Thanks, see you later!''
I wave her goodbye as I walk out the door. Even after walking on a few steps, I could still listen in on the dimming sounds of Jenna getting frantically ready. I admit, it would be sad if she had to quit at Comic City, but she did deserved better. I sometimes lose track of what jobs she is going for, I don't even know what she's applying for today. By the way, that card was genuine alright! We haven't had pizza in ages is all.
As I walked towards school, all I could think about was fulfilling my dream of being a superhero. Although, during the time of training and studying, another thing came to my mind, why not be better than them? After all, there are new superheroes all the time, if I really want to stand out, I have to be the best there is! Why not be the greatest real-life superhero ever? I certainly think it's achievable, I'm just missing two little things...a costume...and a name!
To Be Continued…