J: SURPRISE! Long time no update! For those of you that refuse to read the opening thingies before the actual story this is a little extra add on for those that were interested to know the extent of Anzu and Tea's vocabulary. I have to say, my own vocab isn't that great with name calling and such, so don't expect anything...remarkable. If this doesn't meet your insult needs give me a few really long words to use for either Anzu or Tea, or both. AND if I can work with them I will change this content using what was provided.

Disclaimer: Don't own any yugioh of peoples!

REMINDER: The sequel for 'A Dark Past and Present' is up and running! Just as a reminder it is titled 'A Dim Present and Future' and I know that those that are reading this are mostly BakuraXAnzu fans, but the sequel mainly involves a romance between Anzu and Seto, but I promise there are plenty of freaktacular Bakura moments!

ENJOY!


-Age Five-

"You're a dumbie!" Mrs. Gardener sighed at the sound of her daughter's voice carrying all the way from her bedroom to the kitchen where she sat reading the newspaper. Her husband was scheduled to return at any minute from a last minute inspection call down at the local army base. The last thing he would want to return home to is his daughter arguing with her sister B.T. again.

Mrs. Gardener put down the newspaper and counted to three in her head, at the number three she heard," Well you're a jerk! …Jerks are meanies that don't know their thumb from their little finger and that they say mean things to other people to feel better!...N-no, I'm n-nooooooooooot!" Mrs. Gardener judged the tone and the volume of her daughter's voice and felt that this was one of the more subtle arguments…at the moment. When she started hearing the longer names then she would intervene.

Tea sat on the floor with a broken red crayon in one hand and a broken pink crayon in the other. Her brown hair was tied back in a little blue bow that matched her blue sundress and blue socks. Tears sat in the corner of her eyes as she glared at the other little girl sitting across from her that she considered to be her invisible twin sister that only she could see. She had brown hair just like her but it was longer and tied in little black ribbon pigtails, instead of wearing a sun dress she wore gothic lolita dress with a tiny cute skull as part of the bow on the front. Besides that and her eyes which were gold B.T., or Anzu, was Tea's twin sister for all those that would ever see her. No one but Tea's parents believed that B.T. was actually real, and all the other kids and adults said B.T. was her imaginary friend.

Throwing the broken crayons on the floor in frustration the little girl in blue pointed at her sister and yelled," I am NOT a baby just cause I love my daddy! You're a…a…you're a butt muncher that eats poop!"

Anzu, having an intellect much larger than her 'sister', simply shrugged and smiled in a not very nice way. Walking closer to her mirror image she retaliated," If I'm a butt muncher than you're a naïve little baby that can't even use the potty all by herself, you're a bed wetter that will be eaten by the boogie man because you still pick your nose!"

Tea was a big girl that could already do up her own velcrow shoes and count to 15, being called a bed wetter and being threatened with the boogie man was meaner than any mean name that she had ever been called since she could understand words and exchange them with her sister. Completely devastated Tea let the tears fall and wailed out at the top of her lungs," YOU'RE A MEAN SISTER! MOOOOOMMMMMMMYYYYYY!"

Anzu watched in satisfaction as the little baby ran out of the room crying for her mommy, sitting down she mumbled in a quiet little voice," That's what you get for breaking my red crayon…baby."

TEA:0

ANZU:1

-Age Ten-

"Can anyone tell me what the value of X would be in this equation?" Mr. Tendo scanned the classroom to pick out the most inattentive student, and was rewarded with the sight of Tea Gardener looking at her reflection in the window with a very, unpleasant expression.

Being the mean teacher that he was Mr. Tendo called out," Ms. Gardener I highly doubt you will find the answer outside, now please come up to the board and give me the answer."

Tea cursed under her breathe and sent one more dirty look at her reflection. Yugi Moutto, sitting two seats over from his friend couldn't see this going over very well. He'd known Tea for over a year and he full heartedly believed that she had another personality, or sister, that lived inside her. A flash of gold made him gulp nervously, 'I hope they're not fighting again.' He got his answer when Tea wrote on the board in very large letters, "TEA GARDENER IS A HUGE SLUT THAT EAT'S THE HEART OF MEN FOR BREAKFAST!" Everyone in the class either snickered (the females that envied Tea) or made the (80) face.

Mr. Tendo couldn't even think of anything to say for a whole minute, which was a whole new record of silence on his account. Yugi saw the transition between personalities when Tea took a step back and screamed," ANZU YOU BITCH!" Very quickly she erased everything off the chalkboard, including the math problem. And deciding not to be out done she wrote in even bigger letters," ANZU IS A PENNY WHORE THAT SLEEPS WITH MEN AND WOMEN JUST FOR A QUICK DOLLAR AND EVEN SLEEPS WITH THE POLICE OFFICERS THAT COME TO ARREST HER FOR SOLICITING HERSELF! SHE ALSO HAS EATEN LIVE KITTENS AND PUPPIES FOR BREAKFAST!" As soon as Tea finished she went flying backwards in what all the observers thought was a stroke or fainting spell. Yugi recognized it for what it really was, Anzu was pissed and had pulled Tea into her subconscious mind to have a proper full out brawl.

Sighing in fatigue and pity for his friend Yugi stood from his seat and quietly volunteered to his teacher," I-I'll take her to the nurse's office sensei. Tea's been under a lot of stress lately." Mr. Tendo simply nodded and rather robotically moved to erase the chalkboard.

On that day Tea had won the battle, but had also been titled 'Queen Crazy' for the rest of her middle school years.

TEA:6

ANZU:5

-A Week After Duellist Kingdom-

'Knock' 'knock' Tea opened her front door to meet her little friend Yugi Moutto inside. Shifting from foot to foot nervously she meekly said," I'm glad you could come Yugi. I could really use your help."

"What's wrong Tea? You aren't sick are you?" In his state of worry Yugi pulled Tea down to eye level so he could put a hand on her forehead to feel her temperature.

Smiling kindly she removed his hand and sighed," No, but thank you for the concern. It's actually rather worse than that, it's B.T. She's getting harder to control. Ever since she learned more about your puzzle she's gotten really restless. If she gets to out of hand I could lose complete control for more than just a few minutes. Do you think…do you think the other you could help?" She felt so bad asking help from the other Yugi and not her friend who would do almost anything for her.

Yugi understood and felt no ill will for this request. He took a step back and allowed the spirit of the millennium puzzle to take control of his body. Just as Yugi could identify the changes in Tea when Anzu took control, Tea like wise could tell she was dealing with her new friend that had not only saved her from a creepoid bandit but he had also beaten Pegasus at his own game. The spirit could tell this job wouldn't be very easy, especially since it involved one of his best friends. Meeting Tea's eyes with full determination to help he asked," Is there a room that we could do this out of sight in case your parents return. I don't want to involve them as well."

Tea nodded and led the spirit to the unused room with no door. The room had been there when they had purchased the house, and neither parents or child felt any need to touch it, the room just gave off vibes of negativity that made many people uncomfortable. As they walked into the room Tea felt a sudden pain in the back of her skull. Dropping to her knees and clutching her head Tea gasped in pain," Dammit! SHE KNOWS!"

The spirit stood unfazed as he watched Tea go from a pain labored form to a golden eyed unhappy woman. Her arms crossed Anzu leered at the spirit with as much venom as her eyes could portray. In a voice equally displeased she hissed," So the little cry baby finally got scared of me did she? I bet she blinked those pretty blue eyes at you and told you I'm nothing but a menace."

"And she wasn't lying either. I haven't known Tea long, but I know you are the same as Bakura's other soul. Corrupt and power hungry. You have no right to inhabit Tea's mind or body any longer. You will be banished." To show his words were not empty threats the millennium eye began to shine on his forehead as it resonated with the millennium puzzle that summoned the Shadow Realm to the room.

Anzu rolled her eyes at this power display, she'd seen plenty of it during the duelist kingdom. Lazily waving her hand Anzu informed the spirit," How about a game instead of instantaneous banishment? You win, I go, I win, you go. But it will be a game of my choosing. Deal?"

The spirit hadn't played a non-duel monster's penalty game in a while, he could only assume that his opponent would choose a game he had not familiarity with thus increasing it in her odds. But he couldn't pass up this chance to help Tea start a normal life, he'd heard and seen many examples of the trouble this spirit had caused Tea. Sucking in his pride the spirit gave a nod of agreement to these terms. Anzu's cruel smile twisted up at the corners, she snapped her fingers and summoned the battle field. The spirit was utterly perplexed and let his opponent know so by questioning," Exactly what game are we playing Anzu?"

"It's called a Dark Dance Duel. Tea and myself invented it when those silly cards were released. The rules are simply, but the actual process will be amusing to see for sure." Anzu then graciously explained every single rule invented for the game, and the spirit's facial expression couldn't be any more deliciously worried.

(A/N: At this point the duel plays out with Yami barely managing to keep his pride intact with horrible dancing. If you guys are interested in a full length version of this DDD then please let me know in a review and I shall put it in. But for now use your imagination of Yami doing things such as cheesy disco and the chicken dance xD)

He was, in lack of a better term, royally screwed. He was exhausted and out of dance ideas, and to top it all off Anzu had activated the Special Step of her Mystical Elf that allowed her to not only regain 30 tiles, but also attack him a second time, and all he had left were 30 tiles. Inside he apologized to Yugi for not being able to help Tea and bowed his head in defeat.

Anzu cackled in glorious victory at the sight of the spirit broken and defeated. It would only be another moment before she had officially won. In order for the Mystical Elf to make it's second attack she needed to recharge after using most of the it's energy to bring back 30 tiles. Had she been more observant she would have noticed that a tear had slid down her cheek and her arm was drawing back in a fist.

The spirit looked up when he heard Anzu abruptly stop laughing, he was astonished to see her sprawled on the floor with her own hand clenched around her throat. Realization of what was happening kicked in at the same time that Tea managed to take control of her voice box to yell," Sp-sp-special step CANCEL!" The spirit watched in astonishment as the Mystical Elf seemed to smile in relief towards him and disappear back into the shadows.

Getting back onto his feet the spirit suddenly remembered a dance he had always found amusing, thinking of the right song to accompany it he snapped his fingers and got into the first position. The spirit's previous tuxedo vanished to be replaced by Egyptian clothing that he thought felt a little too comfortable; he could have sworn his skin looked much darker as well. Brushing it off he began to dance in an Egyptian walking movement as the song 'Walk Like An Egyptian' by The Bangles played. Had anyone else been present at the time they would have laughed hysterically, (A/N: Yugi was laughing to the point of tears inside the millennium puzzle, but did so in his own chamber so as not to distract the spirit), thankfully Anzu was too preoccupied with fighting Tea off to realize he was creating a monster. The song ended and the spirit quickly summoned," I call Gaia the Fierce Knight in attack mode and activate his special step, Double Dosage! ATTACK!" He didn't know if it was against the rules or not, but he needed to land the attack before Anzu could retaliate.

Tea must have been paying attention to what was going on as she fought with Anzu and quickly relinquished all control to her evil soul sibling. Rather confused Anzu looked up to be met with the ruthless spear of the spirit's monster. On impact Anzu's tiles vanished along with her shrill voice," I won't be gone forever! I will come back! AND WHEN I DO, TEA ISN'T THE ONLY ONE THAT WILL FEEL MY WRATH! YOU'RE BOTH A BUNCH OF CUUUUUUU-" The shadows vanished leaving Tea and the spirit crumpled on the floor breathing heavily as a single little duel monster's card appeared between them.

Barely managing to push herself up into a sitting position Tea whispered with a hand to her head," Is, is she really gone? It's just me in here?"

"Yes, you have you're life all to yourself now Tea. But whatever you do, don't touch that card. I'll deal with it…in just a moment." The spirit gave Tea a comforting smile before returning to the millennium puzzle to rest and recover. Yugi took over just in time to see Tea collapse with a smile and tears streaming from her eyes.

FINAL SCORE

TEA:10

ANZU:10

Their Vocabulary