Author's Chapter Notes:
Just a little something to hopefully make you smile. A little conversation between the boys after Sam gets stuck in a pipe on the job and Dean tries to go in and rescue him.
Just dialogue in this one, hope you can follow who is who.
Little bit predictable and a little bit naughty too!
"How did you ever think that your giant shoulders where gonna fit through here."
"I got in, I just couldn't get the right angle to turn so that I could get back out. Didn't ask you to crawl in here after me."
"Yeah, you did! How else was I supposed to reach you?"
"Dean, really you're gonna have to move that hand."
"Why? Why?" 'Cos of where it is man."
"Where is it, what is that I'm touching? Oh God, is that a zip?"
"If you don't know what that is, it really is you that's a girl! Your head's on my stomach man, guess where your friggin' hand is."
"Shit! Sorry. Crap, can't move it dude, my sleeve is stuck."
"Fine, I'll move then."
"Sam! Don't move up!"
"Well I can't exactly move the other way with you in the road."
"Yeah but Sam…said it yourself dude, my face is on your stomach. if you move up, it isn't going to my hand that squashing your nuts. Brightside though, my hand would be covering my eyes."
"What? Crap. I swear you move that hand in anyway but off of me…."
"Try the grill again."
"It's STUCK Dean, that why I asked you to SEE if you could get up along side me and help, not just force yourself onto me."
"Never had to force myself on anyone dude, ouch, that hurt! Dude, quit hitting me man or see that hand you're worrying about…!"
"Just, just…do something Dean, turn, move back down….anything!"
"I can't move down, the other grill shut behind me."
"So we're both stuck now?"
"Yeah and since I can't bend my knee to get a good kick at it, the only way out is up. Try it again!"
"Dean, what part of it's stuck aren't you getting? Watch your hand!"
"Sam! It's dark, I can't see shit so I can only feel my way about. Jesus I feel as if I'm in a picture hall trying to get to 3rd base."
"Well you're not! Wait? 3rd Base? In public?"
"Hey, what can I say, the movie was boring. Wait, I'll try and turn."
"Shit, sorry, sorry."
"Sam turn so we're back to back."
"Dude are you cuddling me?"
"No asswipe, my sleeve is caught, turn the other way!"
"Sorry. That better?"
"Yeah but watch your knees Sammy, I'd really like to be able to still to have the option of having kids when we get out of here."
"The jewels Sammy, watch the friggin' jewels!"
"Sorry. Ok, I'm round. Is that your arm I'm on?"
"Bet you're hoping it is."
"It's my arm, don't worry, I got another one. I'm gonna try turning now, Jesus Sam stop wriggling your ass in my face man!"
"Hurry up then! Wait Dean, can you not push me into the wall?"
"I'm sorry Sammy, wait and I'll breathe in! Dude, you're crushing my hand! And that is so, so….I'm gonna need therapy by the time we get outta here."
"Your not the one with his brother's hand squashing his package. Did you just snort?"
"Yeah. Package? No wonder you can't get laid if you call it that. Besides, this is more action than you've see all year."
"Not the kinda action I'm really looking for Dean."
"Can you reach my sleeve? See what it's caught on, 'cos your breaking my damn arm man."
"Wait, I think I got it. No. Wait. Wait."
"Button on it is stuck through a hole in my jeans, I can't get it out."
"Peachy. Never mind. I'm gonna turn now. Lie still."
"I know Sam, I know. It's my hand dude. I'm almost there. Is this good for you?"
"I swear to God Dean….Dean what is that digging into my back?"
"It's my gun dude, don't flatter yourself."
"Seriously, you need to lay off the burgers man, your ass is getting fat."
"Shut up and slide down now."
"Now I have one of your hands on my ass and the other on my d…."
"Shut up Sam. Dude I think we're stuck. Can you move up a bit."
"Not with your hand there, I'll dislocate your shoulder if the sleeve doesn't give."
"I do. Let's just calm down and think for a minute."
"Hey can you reach your phone?"
"Dropped it earlier."
"Fanfriggin' tastic. Can you reach mine then?"
"Where is it?"
"Hey, I've given you your jollies for the last half hour, least you can do is return the favour."
"Not funny Dean. Are you sure you can't reach?"
"It's in my right pocket and my left shoulder's stuck on the wall. Can't get the angle right to reach it."
"Ok. I need to turn back round."
"Great, now we're spooning. Suddenly I'm kinda glad about where my hand is considering what my backside's pressed up against."
"Shut up and breath in, I can't get my fingers inside. Maybe if I wriggle them."
"Think my bracelet's caught in the pocket lining of your jeans. I can't get my hand back out. Just gonna pull and see if it gives, Damn, I'll try it again. Nope. One more time….."
"Sam, if you don't stop that, this is about to get more embarrassing really quickly."
"One word Sammy, friction! Can you curl your fingers and see if you can push it out, maybe I can reach it then or you can reach round and get it."
"You want me to reach round?"
"Sam, so help me God, I swear dude……"
"Sorry, couldn't resist. I think I can reach."
"Sorry, almost there, if I just push with my fingers a little bit more…."
"Sam, you're killing me here man."
"Do you want out of here or not?"
"Phone's a little further over there Sam."
"What? Oh God, sorry, wait I got it. Now what?"
"Can you dial Bobby and get it onto speaker?"
"Think so. Yeah. It's dialling."
"Hey Bobby. It's Dean…….yeah we're kinda stuck on that job you sent us on…..Sam followed it into a drainage pipe and got stuck…..yeah, I'm kinda stuck too….ok….thanks Bobby. "
"We're never living this down are we?"
"Nope. I think there might be pictures taken and everything. That'll be one for the family album!"
"Oh God Dean…..I think I need to….."
"If you pee on my hand Sam, I swear….oh no, did you just….?"
"Liar! Oh Jesus Christ Sam, what the hell do you eat that makes them smell like that? Oh God, I'm gonna be sick."
"God, we're gonna be found dead like this aren't we? Me feeling up my brother and you with your hand stuck in my pocket. On the upside though, maybe they'll have to cut open this pipe, then it won't matter 'cos the whole place'll explode."
"I'd call you my bitch but under the circumstances….SAM….HAND!"
Chapter End Notes:
Hugs, Mary xx